Star Trek doesn' t belong to me.
"Envy" is part 3 of my idea of the end of Kirk's first five year mission, it is a sequel to "Pride" and "Sloth" and a prequel to "Gluttony". As a mindful observer you have realized by now that these are four of the seven deadly sins, therefore you can anticipate 7 parts in total. :-)
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Envy - An emotion that "occurs when a person lacks another's (perceived) superior qualitys, achievements, possessions, or aspirations and either desires it or wishes that the other person lacked it." (Parrott, W. G., & Smith, R. H. (1993). "Distinguishing the experiences of envy and jealousy." In: Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 64, 906-920.)
Minor reference to "The Tholian Web"
Envy
Captain's Log, stardate 6021,7: The Enterprise is on her way to Starbase 3 with the Vulcan ship P'Jem in tow. We have sustained damage in a fight with five Romulan warbirds, during which many crewmembers were injured, including Ensign Chekov, who has still not regained consiousness. Also, the doctors M'Benga and McCoy have been injured previously and so were unable to perform their duties. For that reason I have requested Captain Saluk of the P'Jem to send over a doctor of his crew to help out our medical staff.
Dr. T'Plok has proved to be an asset, and has worked with Dr. McCoy who has resumed his duty this morning quite well. However, we hope that Dr. T'Plok will be able return to her ship when we have reached the starbase, where we will have to undergo repairs on our warp drive. Also, we're hoping to pick up our helsman Mr. Sulu and head nurse Chapel, who were on shore leave, on the starbase.
Our passenger, the Romulan commander Tamulok, has been strangely communicative, socialising with the crew. I have cautioned my officers not to talk to him too freely about the ship, Federation technology or politics. I do not trust Tamulok. My first officer Spock agrees, although he has spent much time with the commander, discussing Vulcan and Romulan history and myths. Spock is still convinced that we have found Vor-Ka-Ri, a legendary place in both Romulan and Vulcan mythology, in the neutral zone. He and Commander Tamulok hope to work out a strategy for proposing a treaty to the Romulan Empire that will allow both, the Federation and the Romulans, to investigate that planet in the neutral zone. I personally think that this will be extremely difficult and dangerous, since we have found out that the Romulans are in the middle of a civil war and we do not know which side is in power right now. What we also don't know is, on which side Tamulok is, the five warbirds that we destroyed with the help of Commander Tamulok were rebel forces, however, their commander, Valdran, seemed to think that Tamulok was on her side.
I am looking forward to handing over Tamulok to the Vulcan delegation that will meet us on the starbase, as well as some well deserved shore leave.
Kirk stopped recording the log, and took a mouthful of cold coffee. He grimaced. Looking around his quarters, he felt a sense of restlessness. He didn't like having to crawl to the next starbase on impulse speed, although they were back in safe Federation territory. And they were better off than the P'Jem which was unable to move by herself.
That explosion had been massive. It had destroyed six ships, the warbirds and Tamulok's ship. Kirk still couldn't understand why Tamulok had sacrificed his own ship in order to save the two Federation vessels. Well, he wouldn't complain. However, he was concerned about that new weapon which had caused this explosion: a generator that modified the shield's frequency until it destroyed all ships with shields in the vicinity. Was it a new weapon developed by the Romulans? Or was it something that Tamulok had found on the planet that Spock suspected to be Vor-Ka-Ri?
"Sickbay to Captain Kirk!" It was the voice of Dr. T'Plok. She was another surprise: definitely Vulcan, but then again, strangely interested in human behaviour, and what was even more strange: she tried to emulate it.
"Kirk, here."
"Captain, you wanted an update on Ensign Chekov's and Dr. M'Benga's condition."
"Yes?" Kirk asked hopefully.
"There's been no change," she reported.
There's been no change for a disconcertingly long time, Kirk thought.
"I'll be right there, Doctor," he said and grabbed his uniform.
"Captain, you will not alter the situation by your presence in sickbay, there is no ..." T'Plok's voice came over the intercom.
"I know, doctor," Kirk cut her off and left his quarters.
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"Now, why did you do that?" McCoy asked the Vulcan doctor vexedly.
"The captain ordered to be informed on the condition of the patients," T'Plok turned to look at McCoy, who had cornered her at the intercom, his arms folded in front of his chest.
"If there was a change. But what good does it do to tell him that nothing has happened?" he stepped forward, trying to intimidate her, as he realized in some corner of his brain, and he also realized that he didn't succeed, because T'Plok either just wasn't able to feel intimidated (it was an emotion, wasn't it?), or because she wasn't able to read human body language well enough.
"He said: "Keep me posted." And this is what I did, doctor," she said, raising an eyebrow questioningly at her colleague.
McCoy took a step backwards again.
"Well, you are not familiar with human behaviour, or with our captain, T'Plok, or you would know, that by giving him your report, you just succeeded in increasing his concerns and making him come down to sickbay, although he should be resting."
"I see. Doctor McCoy, I apologise for my mistake. It is increasingly difficult for me to understand human psychology. I've studied it, as I've mentioned to you before, however, I find the theory to be quite different from the practical experience. I am grateful for your insight on that matter."
"What? Forgive me, doctor, but I was expecting you to put off human behaviour as illogical."
"Humans aren't as logical as Vulcans. That is their nature. If I am to be a physician for humans, then I need to know all about their behaviour and psychology. And I also find it quite fascinating."
"You surprise me. I know a Vulcan who has an absolute aversion to any kind of emotions. I always assumed all Vulcans feel that way."
"You are not completely false in your assumption, Doctor. However, as I consider myself primarily a psychologist, I believe that by studying human behaviour I can learn a lot about the Vulcan psyche as well."
Bones looked up at that. She was a psychologist? He wondered if she was the one who had been assigned to mind meld with him. He took another step backwards, suddenly feeling intimidated himself.
"Really? Vulcans aren't like humans. We are more guided by our emotions."
"Yes, however, we Vulcans have the same emotions that you have. Only, they are stronger than human emotions. That is why we found it necessary to control and surpress them. Unfortunately to a degree, we therefore have lost our ability to understand our emotions. For me, as a psychologist, it is of great importance to understand these emotions, in order to help my patients."
McCoy had put an empty bio-bed between himself and Doctor T'Plok. A Vulcan psychologist, strange, that, he thought.
"Are you trained in mental techniques?" he asked her. Thinking about the mental evaluation, that Starfleet Command had tried to enforce on him, after that mind rape. A Vulcan psychologist would have melded with him if Jim hadn't intervened.
"Yes. But you need not fear me, Doctor. I understand what you have gone through. And I am grateful that this mental evaluation has been put off. Believe me, it is not something I ... enjoy doing, for I know it will probably cause pain. As a matter of fact, I also think this is quite a needless procedure, since you seem ... normal."
McCoy felt increasingly uneasy, he just wanted to forget that incident on Meriah, and he didn't like talking about it, not with his friends, and definitely not with a stranger, least of all a Vulcan psychologist who was able to invade his mind the same way that Meriahn had. And although what she had said was meant to reassure him, he began to feel threatened. Pushing away that emotion, knowing he was being a little paranoid, he mumbled: "Thank you."
Thankfully, Kirk entered at that very moment, searching sickbay for Doctor T'Plok who had called him to inform him about the condition of two of his officers. He found her and McCoy who was staring her down, while gripping hard at the edge of a bio-bed that was between them. Oh-oh, I knew there was going to be trouble, he thought.
"Doctors? What can you tell me about M'Benga and Chekov?" Kirk approached them and suddenly realized that rather than anger, it was fear that eminated from McCoy. He stepped beside him and put a hand on his back, lightly, but reassuring, and hopefully not too obvious for T'Plok.
Although Kirk kind of liked her, he had anticipated some problems. Minor disturbences that are inevitable when humans become involved with Vulcans. But, if he was correct, these weren't minor disturbences. Had the Vulcan threatened McCoy? Kirk remembered with unease that T'Plok was the very doctor whom Starfleet Command had ordered to evaluate the mental state of McCoy by melding with him.
"As I said, Captain, there has been no change," T'Plok repeated and tried to sound reassuring, but succeeded only in sounding as if she was talking to child.
"Doctor T'Plok, I came all the way down here to get a full report on the conditon of my officers and not to hear you repeat what I already know!" he almost shouted at her, staring her down angrily. He knew he was a little bit overprotective these days, when it concerned his CMO, however, he also knew that McCoy was not easily intimidated. To get him to grip the edge of a bio-bed in order not to tremble with fear took quite a lot.
"Jim! If there's been no change, we can't tell you anything that you don't already know! M'Benga's condition is still serious. He's in a coma, and although he should wake up eventually, he will require quite some rehab after that. We believe it is best to transfer him to the starbase's sickbay, where he can receive more adequate care," McCoy said, realizing why Kirk acted the way he did, and feeling guilty. T'Plok hadn't done anything wrong, on the contrary, she had tried to be supportive.
Kirk was somewhat appeased. Maybe he hadn't drawn the right conclusions, but he had to remember talking to Bones later on.
"What about Chekov?" he asked McCoy, who had walked over to the bio-beds on which Chekov and M'Benga lay.
"Well, he still hasn't regained consiousness, although he should have. At this moment, however, I'm not overly concerned. This may be a protective mechanism of his body, for it would be quite painful if he woke now. His trachea has been badly damaged, and each breath would mean quite some discomfort. However, if he doesn't wake up within the next 24 hours, we'll start to become a little concerned, we don't want him to slip into a coma also."
"I have contacted Lieutenant Sulu on Starbase 3," T'Plok piped up.
"Whatever for?" McCoy looked at her questioningly, but all the while kicking himself for not having done so himself.
The corner Kirk's mouth curved up into a half smile. You're not jealous Bones, are you?
"Was that wrong? I apologise. I just thought that it would be beneficial to Mr. Chekov's recovery, to have someone who is close to him come and visit at a moment like this. I have read that even in a coma or unconscious, humans can sense the presence of a close friend or family member which usually has a positive effect on their condition." T'Plok looked at McCoy with genuine interest.
"Yes, of course. That was very considerate," he replied, looking down at Chekov.
"Mr. Sulu said he'd come aboard as soon as we arrive."
"Good, and thank you, Dr. T'Plok. Anything else?" Kirk asked the Vulcan doctor. Bones felt more than a little uncomfortable around her, he observed. He doubted that this was just jealousy, and itched to confront Bones. Maybe there was something about her that he hadn't realized. To him she seemed surprisingly considerate.
"As a matter of fact, yes. I wanted to talk to Dr. McCoy about it first, but I believe you, as commanding officer, should also know."
McCoy stiffened and Kirk glanced at his friend again.
"What is it now, doctor?" he asked impatiently, and again he realized he'd addressed her in an impolite way without knowing if she'd really deserved it.
"Doctor Pulliam's sister was one of the four humans who were murdered on the P'Jem," she said.
"I knew it! She seemed familiar. I think Kate mentioned having a sister on a Vulcan ship once. I should have realized it before," McCoy said.
"Jennifer Pulliam mentioned to me once, that she was very close to her sister. I think her death affects Dr. Pulliam's work negatively. She seems distracted and unfocussed. It could prove to be dangerous for her patients."
"Of course, it does affect her," Bones exclaimed with a touch of anger directed at her, "but she has done a great job in the treatment of M'Benga, Chekov, and myself, so far. So you can't be suggesting to force her to take leave? This would not help her getting over her sister's death at all, you gree ... you hear?" McCoy caught himself.
Kirk gave McCoy's shoulder another pat, then addressed the Vulcan: "Dr. T'Plok, thank you for bringing that to our attention. Now, if you don't mind, I would like to talk to Dr. McCoy in private." Kirk said to her, then pushed McCoy towards his office.
