The room seemed too crowded this evening and Victoire felt like punching Michael in the face as he asked her to dance for the sixth time.
"No, Michael, I don't want to dance tonight, I have a headache!" she snapped.
It was partly true, these day she had the headache twenty four seven. But tonight she needed to think. She needed some time to herself, to arrange her thoughts. As she settled in a corner, Shelby Crawford gave her a knowing look, and Victoire felt like throwing the glass at her face. She loathed to admit that her best friend was right. You will end up hurt, Vic, he's a heart-breaker, Shelby had said wisely.
Well, too bad she didn't care. If Teddy wanted to go on some stupid round-the-globe trip of enlightenment, so be it. She was not going to lock herself up in her bedroom and sob it out. But she knew that wasn't it. She knew what was bothering her. She had been saying stupid things about him being irresponsible and that was when Teddy, in his rare bout of anger, had said it.
Victoire, you don't understand. You know what, you're such a pretty face, you would never have to. You just have to smile and the world will come praying at your feet. You don't need to look beyond, he had said.
Well, as they say, truth hurts more. She didn't need to look beyond, but it was not as if he had to either. Apart from the tragic loss of his parents, he lived a good life too, and not to mention, hordes of girls swooned at his feet too. And that's why she felt more scornful, because of his holier-than-thou attitude. What made him feel he was so special?
Slughorn came barging in. "Miss Weasley? What is a pretty girl like you doing in a corner? Not enjoying the company?"
"It's okay, Professor. I just don't feel that well, tonight."
"Not staying up late, studying are you? No, no, dear, that simply won't do."
Victoire squirmed a little. As Slughorn went on about the good effects of sleep, she suddenly asked, "Professor Slughorn, why did you invite me to join the club?"
Slughorn looked a little taken aback. Then, a wide smile emerged from under his bushy moustache. "Why you're... you're a pretty, young witch, who wouldn't want you in the club?"
Victoire made up an excuse to leave early, and cried into her pillow for about an hour. Teddy was right.
After crying for about two hours or so, her tear glands seemed to have become distinctly stenosed. She sniffed tearlessly and kept tossing around her bed. After two more hours of sleepless unrest, she knew what she would do. She would study hard and get more NEWTs than him and shove it in his face. She would show him she was not just a pretty face!
x x x x x x
Victoire kept pushing her food around the plate and ignored her mother's warning glances. Well, the house was full of guests; she would not make a scene in front of everyone.
"Hey, it doesn't look nice, you know."
Victoire was appalled at the person who said this.
"That's rich, coming from you," she said, scowling at Uncle Charlie.
Uncle Charlie just laughed. It is so annoying when people laughed at insults, she thought, scowling some more.
"Teddy told me," he said.
"So?" she asked, bristled at his sympathetic expression. He did not expect her to break down and cry, did he? Or, had Teddy asked him to snoop around and see if Victoire was wallowing in her misery?
"Nothing. Just wanted you to know, that I'm here if you need to talk."
"What's to talk about? He wants to be Magellan. And I don't care."
Somehow this struck as funny to Uncle Charlie and he said, "Vic, did he tell you why he wants to go explore the world?"
"He wants to look beyond."
"Yes, that. But there's also another reason."
"What? Let me guess, he is tired of safe, sanitary bathrooms and wants to do it in a swamp full of mosquitoes," she said with an unkind smirk.
"That sounds interesting, but no."
"Then what is it?"
Uncle Charlie considered her for a moment, before saying, "Because of his mother."
Victoire sat upright. "His mother? But she's.."
"Dead, yes. But her dream is not, apparently."
"What dream?"
"Well, pretty much the one Teddy wants to pursue."
Victoire did not know how to react.
"But it's not his dream, is it? A lot of us have unfulfilled dreams. I'm sure his mum wouldn't want him go travelling through dangerous forests because it was her dream. Even she didn't pursue it!"
Uncle Charlie looked sober. "Oh, Vic. If you don't want to understand, no one can make you. But maybe this is his only chance of sort of connecting with her. He was a tot when his parents died. Vic, don't be stubbourn."
Victoire sat stolid. She did not get it - if she was ever sure of anything, it was that she loved Teddy. And she knew Teddy loved her back as well. No matter how hard he tried, no matter which peak he climbed, he would not be able to get his parents back. So, did it really make sense to leave your loved ones behind to try and catch a mirage?
Uncle Charlie must have been observing him. "You know what, I have something that'll help you understand. Come on."
After dinner, Victoire followed Uncle Charlie to her father's room. Uncle Charlie cast a Muffliato Charm on the door, and pulled open the cabinet behind Bill's study table.
A glowing pedestal emerged and as Victoire stepped closer, she gasped.
"Oh my God! Dad keeps a Pensive?" she asked shocked.
"Hey, don't tell him I showed you. Now, here's what I wanted to show you," he said, touching the tip of his wand to his temple. He pulled out a wispy, silver thread of memory out of his forehead and set it afloat in the shimmering liquid of the Pensive.
"Take a look," he said, stepping aside.
x x x x x x
Victoire fell on the hard stone floor, but surprisingly it did not hurt at all. She scrambled to her feet, brushing her skirt when she saw a girl sitting in a corner, with her face buried in her hands. By the look of her hunched, shaking form, it was clear that she was crying.
Victoire realized that it was the Astronomy Tower at Hogwarts, and it was the dead of the night. She was about to approach the girl, when she heard the sound of feet bounding up the stairs. She flinched and started to run, before realizing she was in the Pensive and no one could see her.
"Tonks!" shouted a boy, from the stairs.
"Go away!" shouted the girl back, tossing her bubblegum pink hair out of her eyes.
Young Charlie sat down beside her, and gingerly reached out to touch her arm, but thought better of it.
"What is it, Tonks? You know you can tell me," said Charlie.
Suddenly Tonks jumped on her feet.
"Do you know what's wrong with them? They're all bloody scared!" she shouted, throwing her arms up in the air.
Charlie seemed to wait for her to vent out more.
"They think I can't take care of myself. I am of age, aren't i? I am taking the NEWTS, aren't I?"
"Tonks, it's natural. My Mum cried for hours when I said I'm going to Romania to work with dragons. They'll relent, eventually."
"No, they won't. I know it. They have talked to Dumbledore, so that I don't run away. Is that what they expect of me? That I'd run away? I'm clumsy, I'm impulsive, but I'm not irresponsible!" shouted Tonks, at the top of her voice.
What with all that shouting, she suddenly looked tired. She dejectedly walked back to her place and slid down the wall, beside Charlie.
She sat in silence, while Charlie fiddled with his wand.
"You know, they have always wanted me to be an Auror and... I have never known a time when I didn't think of being one. I never afforded myself the freedom to weigh other options, because I can't let them down," said Tonks slowly.
"If you had the option would you have wanted to be something else?" asked Charlie, tentatively.
"Who knows. Maybe," sighed Tonks, staring at the starry sky.
Charlie stood up and walk towards the ramparts overlooking the grounds. "It's going to dawn soon. We better get back," he said non-chalantly.
Tonks didn't seem to hear. She whispered, "I let them choose my ambition, my life. They can't let me have a single year of it?"
Victoire felt air swooshing past her ear, as if it was being sucked away. The surroundings contorted, and squeezed away from her. Before she could realize what happened, she had landed on her bottom on the floor of her father's bedroom.
Victoire took her time standing up. Uncle Charlie, the older self, was looking at her, his arms crossed.
She shuffled across the room, and pulled open the window. She could see a familiar starry sky.
"I never asked him why he wanted to go, you know. I was too angry that he was going to leave me alone for a year. And I was scared for him," she said out to the night air.
When she fell silent, Uncle Charlie said, "So, did you change your mind?"
Victoire did not turn towards him when she nodded - she did not want him to see her tears. Somehow he understood.
She waited till she heard the door click shut, before collapsing on the bed crying.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Written for Hogwarts Online Ravenclaw Collaboration Fic "Connections in Blue and Bronze"
