I Had No Idea

Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. Just having a little fun with them using my own imagination but how I wish I did own them.

A/N: Hi guys! I'm starting another story & in here we're gonna see more cuteness & fluff. There will be cute arguements, hard core Bella, egotistic Edward & playing hard-to-get scenes too. I'm excited about this one ^-^ I'm not yet sure if I'm gonna add some lemons but who knows? (;

Emmett woke up and decided to go get some orange juice from the kitchen. Passing through the living room, he noticed Bella's head peeking through the blankets.

She slept in the living room.

Did fucking Edward bring a girl home again last night?

Since there were two bedrooms and three people, Emmett and Edward shared a room before. Now, Rosalie, one of Bella's close friends is moving in with them and she's sharing the room with Emmett. Edward had to move to Bella's room.

Deciding the big condo was too quiet for his own taste, Emmett wanted to do a wakeup call. Using the iPhone dock in the kitchen, he turned on the radio and turned on all the speakers surrounding the house. Bella did a great job with their surround sound. The whole house was booming. The bass was so damn low. Emmett loved throwing parties here. Good thing these condos were sound proof.

Tuning in to Rosalie's favorite station, he turned it up. Turning around, he saw Rosalie smiling and she kissed him with passion.

"Good morning." She smiled.

"Good morning, beautiful. Hey, did Edward bring home a girl last night again?" He asked.

"I'm not sure. Him and Bella went home last, why?" She looked up at him curiously.

"Bella's sleeping on the couch." He motioned to the living room.

Emmett dropped his hands from her waist and decided to do the main event. He wanted Bella to wake up and scare her to the point that she'd pee her pants again. It happened once upon a blue moon but hey, it was so fucking worth it to watch. It gave him a good laugh for at least a day!

Plugging in the cord for the speaker that was directly at Bella's ears, he hovered over reaching for the outlet. He plugged in the cord but forgot the main power source which was at the other side of the couch. Walking over, he saw two pairs of feet tangled around each other. Running back to the kitchen, he found Rosalie cooking pancakes.

"Rose! Bella brought home a guy too?!"

"What?!" Rosalie exclaimed walking over to look at the living room.

"No, she's alone dummy."

"She's not! Look at how many pairs of feet there are."

Rosalie gasped. Emmett continued to plug in the cord and music blasted through the speakers.

Let's go crazy crazy crazy til we see the sun

I know we only met but let's pretend it's love

Bella hoped out of the couch and started screaming running back and forth. Looking back from where she came from, she screamed once again and raised her eyebrow. Emmett was hiding behind the couch recording the oh-so-hilarious and precious-moment-that-had-to-be-caught-on-tape. Bella ran to the bathroom and Emmett couldn't stop laughing. Rosalie held back a smirk while watching from the kitchen counter.

Walking to the couch, Emmett was prepared to give it to the guy. He'd explain to him that she's not all that. She's a hot piece of meat and he gets it but what he saw should've been a big turn off and that she's not worth his time. He'd say thank you and don't come back ever again.

Looking at the couch, the guy tossed and turned and tried to muffle his ears by the loud, booming voice through the speakers which were directly right next to his ears.

Shaking his head, he decided it was time to wake up Edward and his little bitch. Opening the door ever so quietly, he was going to turn on the switch for the speakers but he was surprised to see that it was an unknown girl without Edward.

Where the fuck is he?

Weirded out and a little worried, he passed by the bathroom and another devious grin spread across his face.

He waited inside the closet next to the bathroom and opened the door slightly ajar, just enough for him to see outside.

Bella got out of the bathroom and Emmett jumped out of nowhere in front of her. She stared in shock, frozen and screamed. Her reactions were always late. She'd always be a second or two frozen before screaming or running for her life.

Emmett's pranks were never getting old. It was still as funny as it is.

Bella was fuming mad and she stomped towards the kitchen. Emmett tried to calm himself down and decided it's time to get rid of the dick Bella went home with before looking for Edward.

Pulling the sheets from the guy's face, Emmett saw an annoyed Edward.

"What the fuck? If you're… Then she didn't… Did you…Who the fuck…What are you…WHAT THE FUCK?!" Emmett yelled in confusion.

"What?" Edward groaned.

"I thought Bella brought home a guy and you brought home a girl."

"I didn't bring home a—"

Emmett raised his eyebrow at Edward and he suddenly remembered.

"Oh shit. Man, I don't wanna fucking deal with her for now."

"You're such a dick."

" ." Edward glared.

"You didn't sleep next to your take home girl."

"Becau-"

"You don't wanna deal with kicking her ass out either."

"Yeah, you're probably right."

"What the fuck happened last night?"

"I thought she was hot, wanted to fuck her but shit got real when we got home. Bella went home first but I followed after her cab coz I was worried sick. She was drunk and alone."

"When we all arrived here, Bella fell asleep on the couch and the girl went straight to the bathroom. She started puking all over the place and I had to clean that shit in the middle of the fucking night. After her puking sessions, she started seducing me and it was going down real good but then—"

"Wait the fuck up, you don't even know her name huh?"

"Nope, not really." He laughed.

"Anyway, I was about to finger her when I felt something stuck up there. She was on her fucking period. Fucking disgusting." Edward cringed at the memory while Emmett half laughed his ass off and half chanted 'ew ew ew'

"She said she forgot and that she would make it up to me. She offered me a blowjob which I accepted coz I was in deep need of a release. It's like turning you on and leaving you hard and shit and you have to take care of it on your own. She asked for the favor back," Edward laughed. Emmett stared at him in horror and pity.

"Dear god please don't tell me you gave her one."

"Hell fucking no! I excused myself to the bathroom and when I came back, she was passed out. You and Rosalie were sleeping and I didn't wanna fucking bother you so I crawled next to Bella."

"Which was so uncomfortable by the way! You know how it feels to be woken up by a damn One Direction song and a dreaming, unconscious guy grinding his morning wood up your ass while groping your vagina? And we barely had space!" Bella butted in.

"You know you liked it, Swan." Edward winked at her

"Think again, Cullen. Would I be ranting right now if I did? Now get yo skanky whore out of this condo or I'll drag her out myself. Next time, try grinding on someone who isn't on their period." Bella yelled back, glaring at him.

"I didn't fucking know! And the fuck, I didn't say anything when I saw a guy practically inserting his penis up your ass and his tongue down your throat!"

"I never said anything near that to have you comment on my actions last night!"

Listening to the two of them yelling at each other, Emmett thought about something.

Why don't these two blind dumbfucks just go out already! They're so oblivious to the attraction and the force pulling them together! It's been like this ever since middle school.

Sigh.

They have no idea.