Reno Sandwiches

"Goddamit!" screamed Reno slamming his cup of coffee onto Rude's desk and emptying half the contents.

"Morning Reno," sighed his partner as he slid his stationery and papers away from the spilt coffee. "Why are you so happy today?" continued the Turk.

"Coz there's never anything to do around here bald and I hate being stuck inside with crappy paper work, it sucks.

"I wouldn't be so sure there's nothing to do you know," said Rude at an attempt to find something that would make Reno simmer down a little. The redhead stared at Rude confusedly and before he could say anything Rude answered the question that he knew was about to come from Reno's mouth. "Just go see Tseng, and I told you nothing." The Turk left the room smirking and looking temporarily contented at the idea that he might be 'on to something' while the bald man finished off his coffee.


"Sup Mr. Tseng" Reno sarcastically saluted his superior and not at all to Tseng's surprise as he casually entered his office.

"Can I help you with something Reno?" replied his superior appearing to have simply ignored the redhead's disrespectful attitude towards him.

"Well kinda, is there some kind of secret mission goin' down that nobody's telling me about."

Tseng replied as he watched Reno curiously rifle through the possessions on his desk. The simplest things seemed to amuse him. "Why would you ask that Reno?"

"It's just that well, I dunno really, just thought there might be something to do around here by now that's all." Reno lifted a purple pen out of a desk tidy, and shook its purple feathers in front of Tseng's eyes.

"It was a gift," Tseng said sternly eyeing Reno's smiling lips.

"Whatever," coughed Reno.

"Oh yes, well I suppose I might as well tell you now. It's just a small case of investigation work, there have been sightings of a strange airship landing. Nothing like anyone's ever seen before. I'm sending Elena and Rude over to the chocobo farming area to check it out."

"What? A chance to get out of this dump to go see the pretty chocobos, why didn't you tell me?" The redhead's position slumped and he stood moody, looking like a child about to enter a dentist's surgery or having just being told he couldn't go to his best friend's slumber party.

"I didn't inform you Reno because it's just a simple mission and probably nothing at all and we don't need it turning into anything unnecessary, like last week." The Turk raised the tone of his voice, questioning Reno's ability to actually remember what happened.

"You're still on that?" said Reno trying to piece together all that he could in his mind of last week's mission. "Dude you really have to learn to let stuff like that go." The redhead flicked his long hair to the side out of his eyes. "Besides, I had had a few."

Tseng simply rolled his eyes at the Turk stood in front of him. "Talk to Rude and Elena, see if you can't convince one of them to switch with you."

Reno saluted his boss once again with a cheesy grin and then left the office. Tseng just hoped that one of the other Turks would be willing to stay behind tomorrow. Anything for a quieter life.


"Hey baldie!" shouted Reno. The Turk slowly raised his head as his noisy partner entered the room, signalling for him to continue. "How come you didn't tell me there was a mission on?"

"Because it probably wouldn't even last more than a few hours and remember,"

"Don't Rude! I've already had that from Tseng!" Reno shoved his arms into the pockets of his jacket and stood there shooting evils at Rude, as if it was an attempt to scare him.

"Reno, you put the guy in hospital,"

"But Bald!"

"For 3 days Reno, we have enemies now that we didn't have before that."

"He looked suspicious," the defensive tension in the Turk's voice grew.

"Sitting In a café, reading a menu. Yes Reno… very suspicious."

"Shuddup you stupid bald man!" screamed Reno trying to think of something to justify what he did, but he couldn't. So he did what he always did at times like this, lost for words. He changed the subject. "So you think 'Lena will switch with me or what?"

"I'll switch instead," said Rude, "you and Elena go."

"Can't wait to tell her the great news tomorrow."

"She'll love it."


"What?" came Elena's voice from the other end of the corridor, "with Reno, but what about Rude? Sir I was looking forward to that."

"I know but honestly Elena it's just easier to give him what he wants, I'm sure you can understand." Tseng sat in his office chair with his usual morning coffee preparing himself for another strenuous day's work.

"Morning ladies, been talking bout me much as I made my way here? I know it's hard to resist." Reno sang his way into the room, grinning idiotically at his boss before leaning on Elena's shoulder.

"Two hours time Reno, understood?"

"Yeah sure thing Tseng," replied the redhead reaching over for the cup on Tseng's desk. "Needs more sugar, and milk, and sugar" he continued after taking a sip.

Before Elena could even greet Reno he was off again, "Well I'm gonna go see my bestest baldest buddy now, later."

As he left the office thoughts circled Elena's head, 'Was he on drugs?' and 'what the hell is up with him?' and she was ever so slightly nervous about their mission. Not the task itself, that was easy, but because of the hyper state of mind Reno appeared to be in.

"Hey Rude," the redhead skipped into his partners office seeming to have an unusually happy aura around him.

"Reno," replied the Turk hesitantly noticing what his partner was holding. "What's that?"

"I maded you a sammich baldie," Reno answered. He walked over to the desk with a smile crossing his face and set the plate down in front of Rude.

"Why?" asked his partner. With a great interest he slowly moved his hand towards the sandwich to examine it.

"I thought you might be hungry, I'm being nice." The look on the Turk's face appeared to be genuinely sincere. Rude wasn't entirely sure that the thing he was about to put near his face wasn't about to explode but he didn't want to hurt his partner's feeling either. "I cut it into bite sized bits for you too," Reno said this in a voice so much more high pitched that his normal one that it was almost adorable and Rude unfortunately found it hard to refuse.

"What's in if first?" Rude already knew he was going to have the sandwich but he decided it was probably still safer to ask anyway.

"It's a Reno special sammich!" his friend stood grinning childishly. "Cheeses, hams, lots of layers and stuff." He kept on grinning and waited for Rude to start eating.

"You gonna watch?" asked the bald man about to take a bite.

"Nah, I'll be back in about 30minutes to an hour baldie… enjoy" replied Reno waving as he left the room.


About three quarters of an hour later Reno strolled happily into Rude's office where his partner was going through some paperwork from a couple of days before. "Hey…partner," he said shutting the door behind him.

"Hey," Rude was slightly confused by the tone of Reno's voice as he came in but even more so by the worrying expression on his face.

"Was it tasty Rude?"

"…yes… thank you Reno."

"Good," the redhead closed in on his partner, "eat it all?"

"Yeah, I did."

"Sweet," the Turk continued to move closer to Rude and then stood at the back of his desk chair. At this point Rude knew there was something not quite right about Reno. "How ya doing big guy?" He put his arms around Rude's neck as he whispered to him.

"Reno, what are you doing?" asked Rude feeling uncomfortable with the idea of what he thought Reno was doing going through his mind.

"What's the matter Rude? You tense?" Reno had no intention of letting his partner answer any of these questions, he had his plan set. "Just relax Rudie."

Rude had never thought of Reno as the shy type when it came to delicate situations, and what he was about to do just reconfirmed it all. He watched his partner as he came around to the other side of the chair, pushing it away from the desk and back against the wall near a window.

"Reno…" Rude raised his voice slightly and Reno lowered his head to look the Turk in the eye but just carried on like he hadn't heard him, let alone understood him. He leaned in and kissed Rude on the lips taking him totally by surprise. Reno had messed about with him before joking, mostly when he was drunk. But he had never kissed Rude like this before.

"Reno," Rude said after his friend pulled away.

"Shh," the redhead pushed two of his fingers up against Rude's lips. "Please don't tell me to stop Rude."

The bald man was becoming more and more uncomfortable because of the situation and was gripping tighter to the arms or his chair by the second. Reno knelt down in front of Rude and unzipped his trousers to touch him. Rude didn't quite know what to say or do because of his disbelief about his predicament but mostly because of the Reno that was attached to him. He knew he shouldn't like this, but he did. Of course he did, anyone would.

"Rude you're so, well I guess it's true what they say about bald guys," Reno laughed that cocky laugh that was filled with self satisfaction. "Do you like that Rude?" This really didn't help Rude's resistance to what Reno was doing. But surely if he really did want Reno to stop, he would have made him by now. Though he tried to ignore it, he couldn't. He tried to control himself, but he really couldn't. "Oh, I guess that's a yes."

As soon as he had spoke the redhead jumped up and ran out of the room, leaving Rude in a very awkward situation. Rude was angry, frustrated and hard, but mostly angry. He hadn't been this mad at his partner before, and couldn't believe what he'd just done to him. He pulled himself back over to sit at his desk, and after putting his head in his hands shouted his partners name as loud as he could before trying to calm himself down.

"Hey Elena, you ready? lets go" Reno came running into the room, only just stopping before running into the sofa where Elena was sitting having just put down a magazine onto her lap.

"Hey was that Rude just now?" Reno grabbed the blond by the shoulder, pulling her up and off the sofa. "Reno?"

"No time, I'll explain later. We've got work to do Elena or have you forgotten reading your magazines!" Elena opened her mouth to speak but instead of making a legible sound she found herself being dragged down the hallway by Reno. Apparently he'd taken charge, and Elena was sure that the fun was about to begin some time soon.


A/N: Well I hope you liked it so far, please review and let me know what you thought.