Parker was repeatedly banging her head into the dry erase board.
It no longer mattered that her head ached even without the added abuse, frustration was fairly seeping out of her pores.
She truly wondered how Nate had managed not to take a header off of a thirty foot skyscraper without the benefit of gear for all of those years.
How does one manage to stay sane when they have so much responsibility?
"What the hell are you doing?"
She momentarily stopped the relentless assault on her skull in order to face her best assault weapon.
She frowned forlornly and shook her head.
"I thought we'd gotten over this, Parker," Eliot slammed his beer bottle on the counter irritably and crossed his arms, "Nate and Sophie aren't coming back. What was that speech about it all being okay when we said goodbye to them? You seemed fine -" Eliot narrowed his eyes thoughtfully, "- unless this has nothing to do with Nate and Sophie coming back."
Parker sighed and flung her head back to stare at the ceiling.
Eliot's profiling of her took a backseat to his anger. "Dammit, Parker, snap out of it and just communicate like a normal person!" He snatched his beer from where he'd abandoned it on the counter and flopped down on the couch opposite her and the dry erase board.
Parker slowly moved to sit on the hard back chair she kept close to the board - comfort during brain storming was the devil's playground in her opinion - and stared at her hands for a long moment.
"Do you think I'm doing okay - you know, at - at running this team?"
Eliot eyed her for a moment. "You're running this team? I thought I was running this team."
Parker's brow furrowed in confusion. "What?"
Eliot grinned at her befuddled expression and took a long pull off his bottle. "Parker, you're doing a great job. You don't run things like Nate, but all in all, in many ways that's a good thing."
He watched her with his characteristic detached curiosity as she picked at the dry skin around her nails.
"I don't know, Eliot. It never seemed this hard for Nate. He just snapped his fingers and poof," she snapped her own fingers, "everything magically fit together. We might have to go to Plan Z, but it got done."
Eliot shook his head in confusion. "Parker, since Nate and Sophie left, we've had dozens of jobs. We've never even had to resort to Plan G yet. What's really eating you?"
Parker swallowed hard and shook her head."It all seems too easily done. It's like Nate was intentionally sabotaging us, or putting us in dangerous situations. And I hate thinking like that, Eliot. But it just seems..."
"Like Nate enjoyed the thrill so much he'd jeopardize our safety?" Eliot cocked an eyebrow, and Parker felt as if he had taken the words straight from her lips.
"Kind of, yeah. It's not easy, but we haven't had any near death experiences in over two months, which probably shatters our record when Nate ran the team."
Just then, she heard the front door clicking and buzzing, signalling that Hardison was back from his comic book store shopping spree.
She stood quickly and crossed the room at lightening speeds.
She grasped Eliot's muscled forearm tightly and leaned forward until her lips almost touched his ear. "Please don't say anything to Hardison about what we've said, okay?"
Eliot hesitated, causing her a moment of panic before he nodded. He swallowed and shifted, which confused her.
Human behavior tended to do that to Parker, but this felt different. Like maybe even Sophie would be stumped by it. Doubtful, but it would be fun to think about the 'grifter who knew all' being stumped by human interaction.
It was only when Eliot flexed his biceps that she realized she was still leaning down and holding his wrist.
She released him and stood abruptly just as Hardison entered.
Hardison stopped in the doorway, glancing back and forth between his girlfriend and his best friend. "What's going on?"
Parker froze. Seconds seemed like hours. Minutes were days.
Finally, after what felt like a century, Eliot stood and walked to the kitchen to retrieve a beer, "Nothing's goin' on, Hardison."
Parker smiled widely and ran to wrap her arms around his neck, "How was comic book shopping?"
"Aw, hell naw, now I know you two is up to somethin' shady. What's goin' on, Eliot? What's happenin' Parker? You gonna kill me in my sleep?"
Hardison's voice raised about an octave and a half until Eliot cringed.
"Hardison, nothing's going on, okay?" Eliot gestured wildly in Parker's direction, "Parker and I were just -"
"Eliot!" Parker interrupted frantically, her heart thundering in her ears.
Eliot continued, "Parker was asking me if you'd said what you wanted for Christmas, man."
Hardison visibly relaxed, nodding.
"Gotcha."
Parker never wanted to lie to Hardison, but she knew that if he caught wind that anyone was questioning Nate's leadership abilites, it would greatly upset him.
For some reason, after Nate and Sophie left, Hardison had created an alternate reality in that head of his, making Nate out to be Ward Cleaver.
As Hardison turned to unpack his new treasures, she stared at Eliot across the room. Their eyes locked, and just as Eliot's eyes shifted away, she caught a glimpse of a look that, up until that moment, only Hardison had ever given her.
And up until then, she never wanted anyone else to to look at her that way.
