A/N: Time for another story, now, this will be a Co-ob with Mad Bobert and into another Self-Insert, only this time, neither of us will have knowledge of the events that are to transpire, that doesn't mean of course we won't help on certain events.
We will be taking pieces from both the anime and translated novel, so it is fair to both parties in a way, but it won't matter most of the time since we will be writing OC scenes involving us in the game alone.
Now, this will also be a unique fanfic since I am writing about gender bending for the first time, but, if you want details, read on, and enjoy.
Chapter One: Dude Looks Like a Lady!
Do you ever think that if you had just been a better person in the slightest degree, that Karma wouldn't be a total bitch?
Well, I think that every day now, I never did anything too bad, download a pirated movie, hacked a few games for my enjoyment, even in this case just took a copy of a game only to be released into Japan, an absolute cybercriminal, but to I deserve this? I guess I was asking for problems on the account of a sensitive piece of software being copied, but...
Yeah, Karma's a bitch, as am I.
I had woken up at a ridiculous time in the morning but was still as excited as a kid in a candy shop, why you might ask? Because of a simple thing called Sword Art Online, the first ever VRMMORPG and I was play it.
Now, naturally with such a game you would think I would be shouting it over the rooftops, well, no, not unless I have a fetish for handcuffs.
It isn't technically legal, I mean, people download things over the net all the time, why should this be different?
…
Okay, it was only meant to be released in Japan and I could be held accountable for international theft, but hey, its motherfucking SAO, why not?
I am currently chatting to my friend, Robert, over the video cam in my laptop. Quick explanation, Robert is my partner in crime, both figuratively and literally, I get through the difficult programs in anything we do, and he covers my tracks, I like to refer to ourselves as the soldier and the ninja due to this, with my heavy hit hard tactics and his subtle and quick approach, we have never gotten so much as a visit from the law.
Ying and Yang and all that.
Robert had been one of the lucky ones, one of the 1000 beta testers and he was twelfth highest level out of them all, it wasn't a competition, but he kept track himself anyway.
The game was brilliant from what he described, and it had better be, since it uses NerveGear, and from such a great man as Kayaba Akihiko, and right now we were talking about it.
"Okay then, just look for the NPC with the orange stand and we'll meet up," Robert told me as he got out his NerveGear helmet, it looked pretty cool with the visor and all and I was going to love playing it with him.
"So, pigs and rats and junk at the beginning? Typical of the regular RPG, just to check, it doesn't really hurt, does it?"
Robert shakes his head at me, "You always had a problem with things like that, no, it is only a game, if people started giving a device which could actually make you feel like you got ripped in half then the NerveGear would have been bankrupt"
I winced slightly, yeah, as excited as I was, I hate pain.
"Are you okay over there by the way, it's almost four AM right?"
I gave a lopsided grin, "Are you kidding? Miss the grand opening of this with my best buddy, hell no; I would miss my grandmothers wedding for this"
"And risk the wrath of your mum?"
I winched again, "Well... I would have second thoughts then"
A throaty chuckle came from Robert, "So, playing as a trans again?"
Yeah, laugh it up, I usually play as a girl in games, so? I like the experience, plus, if I am playing a VR, with the body practically my own, *wink* *wink*
"Pervert" Robert muttered,
"Oh, did I say that out loud?" I asked in mock innocence, yeah, you are jealous,
"Just go get set up, I'll see you in game." he replied before the screen blinked out showing he was no longer connected to the call.
"And so, time to connect" I mumble as I took out my own little piece of headgear, after starting the program of it on my computer, I put on the equipment, and lay down on my bed,
"I'm going global" I said as a parting phrase, well, second to last anyway,
"Link start" I say before closing my eyes, and the world turned white.
Five blue circles burst onto the screen one after another, before turning green showing the that the all my senses were linked. Logging in with the username and password Robert provided and selecting the English language I looked at the character creation screen, my body had been turned into a cursor for the task,
Before I did my appearance, I got the boring stuff out of the way. Skills. The way this game worked is that you pick five skills to start with and then unlocked more skill slots from side quests that randomly appeared on floors.
My starter skills I picked were Two Handed Assault Spear, Heavy Metal Equipment, Extended Weight Limit, Sprint, and, hey, might as well live it up with Cooking.
"Okay then, time to get this shit started, now, should I be an H-Cup, or a more modest D-Cup?" I said as I looked through the numerous options available,
Okay, I have a breast fetish, I admit it.
I decided on a E before moving onto the next step, Hair. I finally decided on fiery red hair that reached my hips, which were slightly wide with a trim stomach, my legs and arms would be muscular, but only slightly, don't want to look like a macho chick.
Clothing was next, I decided on a simple blouse with trimmings of blue and gold, I had some long fit tight trousers with a gold colour as well, I had two red hair bands treated in my locks as well on either side of my head.
My face was tidy and narrow, my cheeks were nicely round and I decided on envy green eyes to complete the look, as I looked at my avatar's body I thought of an important question.
"Would loving this body be narcissism, or incest?" I took a thoughtful pose, as much as I could as a cursor anyway,
"And would I be heterosexual, or a lesbian when I pick up chicks in the game?" I tilted my 'head' the other way to think,
"Some questions to consider on the chatboard after I'm done" I saw, typing in my characters name, Charlie. I then finished off by putting my 'hand' over the accept icon.
A flash of light later, and I am standing up, I wait a fes seconds, listening to the excited chatter among the other players, before opening my eyes.
Wow.
"Wow..." I cough slightly, my voice was a female pitch now, I didn't think to edit that, luckily, it was a decent tone, just deep enough to not be a squeaky annoying pitch, like a sultry accent on it.
Cool.
I then take in my surroundings, it was a large plaza, beautifully decorated with crowds of people randomly appearing in flashes of blue light, Taking a step forward, I instantly tripped over my own legs and fell flat on my face.
I guess it would take some time to get used to my legs.
"Do you need any help?" I looked up at the sound of a male voice to see a dark skinned man who towered above the rest of the people in the area. His hair covering his head and he had a large axe on his back.
Accepting his help, I got back up blushing from embarrassment . "Its easy enough to walk on this, just have to get used to your new body for a few seconds" the man instructed. Taking a deep breath I took a step forward.
And managed to stay upright, phew.
"See it just takes practice," the man said with a smile. "Soon you will be running around here with the best of them," he finished. As he said that a dark haired man ran past him, knocking into me and sending us both to the floor.
Twice in one day? Really? It hasn't even been 5 minutes ingame yet.
I looked down my bountiful valley to see a black haired mop of a man between them.
"Enjoying the feel?" I asked, regaining my cockiness,
The guy blushes up a storm before he quickly jumps up and runs off.
"At least buy me dinner first..." I muttered, before the same hand that helped me before came into view.
I grasped the giants hand, and got pulled off the ground again, to be greeted by his face breaking out in a grin,
"Still need some practice" he laughs before giving me a salute, "I'll be leaving you alone miss, good luck with the game"
He walked away, and I couldn't help but feel that whoever gets that guy mad might be very sorry.
Was that his natural height?...
Nah, no one can be that freakishly tall.
I went on my way, keeping an eye out for a orange stand. The street was crowded with sounds of laughter and people moving around gleefully examining items for sale and chatting with friends. There were stands selling everything from swords and armor to chairs.
Finally reaching the end of the street, I was saw the a NPC shopkeeper trying to sell oranges. The entire stand was orange in colour and the NPC had orange hair.
…
Well thats original.
Looking to the side, I saw another player begging a female player to join his party, with the fact he was begging, it was obvious he wasn't succeeding, as the girl was just basking in the attention.
Obviously a male player, the only thing I hate about some other trans is that they get a hard on from making other males flip through hoops for them.
Looking around for Robert I couldn't see him anywhere.
Damn, he was probably going to go ninja on my-
"Hello!"
HOLY SHIT!
I stumbled back in shock, my unskilled use of controlling my avatar making me fall to the ground for the third time that day.
"What is with me and falling flat on my ass right now?"
"Karma?" suggested Robert, he then stuck his arm out to lift me up, and I wondered if any women would show me concern in any respect here, and better help offered from a blond bombshell and not a dull guy.
"You know, I bet any of the men here could tell you're not a girl instantly," Robert snarked. "I doubt they are stupid enough not to realise." I was speaking out loud again.
At that moment a overly heroic looking man ran towards me. "JOIN MY PARTY!" he all but screamed me. "YOU SO HOT!" he continued, not bothering to hide the fact he was staring at my chest, here is a hint, the more handsome or beautiful an avatar is, the more likely it is a guy who has enough craters to match the moon.
Looking at Robert, I saw his face was covered in disbelief at the stupidity of his gender.
"Did you hear that Lucian?" I mock asked him while using his username, "This guy thinks I am one hot girl" I smiled in a wicked way, I loved it when I proved him wrong.
"PLEASE!" He then bowed deep into the ground, me and Robert hightailed it before he could look up,
"How did you sneak up on me like that?" I asked him once we were at a safe distance, "I mean, I know you are sneaky but you just walked in front of me and I didn't see anything until you spoke"
"I picked the hiding skill, it is a usefull to invest in if you want to ambush something"
Looking at him I saw he had a dark brown cloak on, with a hood obstructing his face from view, casting it into shadows. He had a longish dagger on his hip, hiding very well from view under his cloak.
"How did you get weapon and armor!" I asked excitedly, wondering how he had it since I didn't have anything on me when I logged in.
"Did you check your inventory?" he asked, an eyebrow raised under his hood.
Chuckling nervously, I shook my head.
"Why don't you do that then?" he questioned. I stood there for a few more seconds before he sighed and demonstrated how it worked.
I found I had in my inventory a wooden spear with a sharp stone tip and a set of weak looking chainmail. Equipping it I looked down at myself. I could feel the weight of it on me. It was a metallic but not that nice looking, the metal links were a bit rusted and it didn't look like it would offer the best protection.
"How did you get a cloak then? It doesn't look like a starting item?" I asked him. "Oh this?" he replied. "I got it from this NPC in the park. Not many people buy it since it offers little to no protection but I like it since is does not decrease my movement speed at all" he finished.
"You always were the shy one" I teased, He punched me lightly in the shoulder for my comment and we walked on through the crowds.
After a few more minutes and several male players begging for me to join their party, we arrived at the city limits.
The Gates opened showing a massive open field, with trees and mountains in the distance.
"All right!" I yelled before running towards the fields excitedly, my spear in my hand. I heard Roberts voice in the background yelling something to me, but I ignored it wanting to reach combat faster.
Then I fell
The sudden loss of ground beneath me made me lose my footing as I tumbled down the stairs towards the grasslands below. I felt each and every one of the stairs hitting my body until I hit the bottom with a thud.
Groaning I pushed myself of the ground. Looking around I saw Robert casually walking down the stairs. "I warned you," he said with a large smile on his face.
"Shut up," I replied as I dusted myself off from my fourth encounter with the ground that day.
"Hey wait," He called to me, turning around I caught a small potion he threw me. "You're on half HP from your small tumble" He told me, laughing at my expense,
"Really?" I looked up to see a health bar, now half full,
"Well that's perfect" I said as I picked myself up, "I can just imagine it, I trip at the last moment in the fight and I die that way, perfect"
"Ah you respawn after a few minutes, but lose half your money"
"Still, not in a hurry to kick the bucket" I said as I turned back to the scenery, "Even if it is temporary"
We stood in silence for a few seconds.
"It is really beautiful" I mutter as I looked slowly around,
"Yep" There is my man Robert, a man of few words.
I gulped down the health potion and then the empty bottle disappeared in a white light, "That encourages litter bugs you know"
"Well, we are going to be endangering some species so I think we don't have to worry about littering"
Heading further into the field, we saw a Boar. "Go ahead" Robert motioned. Nodding I ran it and stabbed at it with my spear, scraping it as it moved.
Trying again I missed as it charged at me. Moving out of the way just in time, I tried to stab at it again and missed for a third time. "Why can't I hit the damn thing!" I yelled.
As I yelled, the Boar did a surprising 180 before slamming into me. The impact send me flying back, hitting the dirt with a thud. I rolled on the ground in agony, "Right in the yolks" I breath out through clenched teeth.
Robert looked down on me, "Even if you could feel pain, you're a girl right now"
I blinked, "Oh right" I stood up from the ground.
Robert sighed. "Try using a Sword Skill, the system helps you with them. To do them you have to do the right motions. If you do it right the system will help you by locking onto the target and helping you hit. Try pulling back your spear and waiting a few seconds before attacking"
Doing what he suggested, I pulled back my spear and felt energy charging up in my arms. The tip of the spear glowed a deep blue, I saw the Boar drag its hoof through the dirt a few times before charging again, I readied myself, before letting loose with a forward thrust.
"Stab!" I shot forward with my spear head's light still shining and I gorged a hole into the pig's snout.
The thing twitched for a few seconds before it fell to pieces, the blue polygons releasing into the air.
A little square appeared in front of me showing my earnings from defeating the Boar, ecstatic that I had beaten it finally, I fist pumped the air only to have my excitement ruined by Robert.
"Well done, you killed a pig." he bluntly told me.
Looking at him annoyed, I said "It was my first blood, what you are looking at is the start of a champion"
"A cross dressing champion" He replied coolly,
"What, do you want me to prove I'm a girl?" I asked him, moving my hands to my chest as if to take off my armour.
He sighed, "Act like that and I would think you're interested in men," he said with a smirk
"You wish" I said back,
I then looked around, "Now it's time to bring home the bacon" I said, "Let's hunt some more, I want to get to level five before we have to leave"
"Let me show you how it's done," Robert said with a evil smirk before drawing his dagger and holding it in a reverse grip.
Sprinting to a pig that was closest, a small dark aura covered his blade. As he got closer he swung his arm out, the sword skill activating and increasing his movement speed towards his target.
He kept moving till he was on the other side of the boar, before sheathing his dagger and walking back. "Hey the Boar's still alive you know?" I yelled at him, as a red line slowly grew around the boar's neck. After a few seconds the line met up with itself and the boars head fell towards the ground before its body disintegrated.
"Wha!?" I looked at the place where the Boar used to be, and at Robert.
"There is no way you are only level 1!" I shouted at him, he just gave a booming laugh and rushed to the next target,
I was not going to be outdone, so I went to my next target too, and began stabbing.
"You know the best thing about this NerveGear deal?"
"What?" asks Robert as he cleans his dagger pointlessly,
"The fact that I can do all this badass stuff, yet I won't get tired or hurt, I don't know why I hadn't tried it earlier"
"You heard a rumour that it makes your brain dumber"
"Hey! I had exams, I couldn't risk it"
"Yeah, besides, you are dumb enough on your own"
"Fuck you"
It was now sunset, after six hard core hours or grinding, we had both reached level 3, I loved the experience. I could feel the fight happening and the sun on my skin. A slight breeze had picked up and I was surprised at how lifelike the game was.
"How about a quick duel" Robert suddenly asked,
I smiled, "The classic Heavy vs Quick again huh?"
"Yep" replied Robert with a knowing smile, bringing up his menu and pressing the Duel challenge button.
"Your on!" I said as I took a fight stance against him, adrenaline pumping.
He smiled, as I accepted the challenge, in half loss mode
Looking at each other for a moment, not moving as the 60 second countdown ended, I charged.
"Attacking from the front again I see" He commented, before he ducked under my thrust and swiped my feet out from under me with his foot, losing my footing I hit the ground with a thud as he jumped back, taunting me.
Jumping back onto my feet, I swung the side of my spear towards him, the reach of the weapon giving me an advantage, stopping him from countering.
Deflecting the attack, Robert leapt towards me with his knife in a reverse grip, swinging at me. Blocking at the last moment due to the speed of the attack, I used the spear to push him backwards.
I then twist my weapon to the side to hit him in the ribs with the blunt side of the shaft, he let out a gasp and I immediately followed up by using the point in a downwards swing in a half circle arch towards his head.
He dodged out of the way, the edge of the spear hitting the ground. He grabbed my spear and kicked me in the stomach, away from my weapon and disarming me. He then prepared to charge up an attack, the light around his knife being absorbed into the aura, but before he could use it he was tackled by a red blur.
I blinked a few times, looking at the scene.
"Huh?" was the only sound I could make, the sudden interference from a random stranger.
I stared at the man who had come out of nowhere before realising the situation.
"Yes! You finally fell to the ground instead of me!" I cheered, while doing a little dance, but I was on the ground so it looked more like a wriggle.
Both of the men stopped and turned to look at my wriggly dance. Roberts face staring at me in amusement and the other man blushing from the shaking my body was doing.
Yeah, complete tease.
"Grow up Charlie," Robert called over to me. "You're embarrassing yourself."
Getting to my feet at the same time as Robert, we both look at the intruder, who was still staring at me in shock. Hearing the sound of footsteps, I turned around and saw the man who had run into me earlier.
"Hey! You're that guy who groped me earlier!" I yelled at him, the said molster then went red,
"It-it was an accident!" was all he managed to say before the other guy looked at him.
"Kirito, You've been groping random women?" was all he could say before Robert burst out laughing.
"I knew those days of you playing a woman was going to bite you in the ass one day" he managed to say between chuckles, it was eligible to me, but the other two didn't hear him,
"Shut up Lucian" I grumbled, I went over to my spear and picked it up, "And you!" I pointed to the red head guy, "You just ruined our duel, I was about to turn the tables on him"
"B-but he was going to hurt you" He tried to defend himself.
"It was a Duel, he was meant to hurt me" At the guys clueless look I sighed but before I could explain the other guy, Kirito started to explain,
"Duels are basically a player vs player fight that takes place if both people agree. There are three types, Total health mode, Half health Mode and First strike mode. The way you win depends on the type of duel"
Realising what he had done, he then turned to me and started to speak very fast, "Hi I'm Klein Im 22 and single and looking for a girlfriend and I'm sorry I stopped your fight!"
At this point, Robert had started rolling on the floor laughing, my eye twitched,
"Um, that is... sweet to hear, but I don't think that it would be a good idea"
Klein looked down sadly but dropped the subject.
"Anyway," Kirito began, "I'm Kirito, We were looking for some Boar when we saw your fight." he explained,
Klein looked excited for a moment but then his stomach growled. "I would love to come, but I have a pizza waiting to be delivered," he said before bringing up the menu.
Robert looked at Kirito for a second, bother pointing at him. "I remember you from a floor boss fight in Beta,"
Kirito looked at him and nodded his head and was about to reply, when Klein interrupted. "Hey, where is the logout button?"
Kirito looked at Klein before bringing up his own menu, "Its right here at the bottom of the menu..." He trailed off as the he spotted the missing option from the the list.
"See? Not there" says Klein, I took out my own menu as well, sure enough, it wasn't there either.
"That can't be right, Lucian, you said there was hardly any bugs or glitches, right?"
Robert nods, Klein then says, "Well, its the first day out of Beta, its bound to have a few bugs"
He cracks a smile, "Hehe, I'm sure the server people are freaking out"
"Pretty soon, you will be too" said Kirito,
"Eh?" he enquiries back,
Kirito points to the clock, "Its 5:25 pm"
As Klein adopted a horror filled expression, I did the math in my head, if it was 4 am back home, and six hours had passed...
...
"My teriyaki mayo pizza and ginger ale!/Fuck! My mums is going to kill me!"
We then stopped screaming slightly and looked at each other,
"What the heck is teriyaki mayo pizza?/You're worried about your mum?"
The two others of our group ignored our questions however.
"Just hurry up and call the game master" both of them say at the same time, they blinked and looked at each other,
Klein then did a quick check, "I just did, but nothings happening"
I was starting to get a bit worried, I started calling the game master as well.
Nothing.
"R-Robert?" the said man turned to me, he didn't mind how I slipped up with his name "there must be a backdoor or something out of here right, you know, like another way to log out?"
He shook his head after a few seconds of silence, "No, the only way there is to log out is through the menu, nothing else"
"But thats nuts!" Klein hollered, "There has to be some other way"
He then started to jump on the spot, throwing different poses while shouting a bunch of words to try and escape, anywhere else and at another time it would have seemed comical, but the beautiful seeming sunset seemed to only be a quickly darkening landscape.
"I told you" Robert continues slightly annoyed but containing none of his original ire, "the only option there has ever been was through the menu, no emergency logouts had been made either in the manual, it doesn't exist"
"You're, kidding right?" asks Klein,
"When it comes to Robert, he doesn't kid when it matters" I say, I was practically glaring at my menu, waiting for some detail to pop into view and tell me its all right.
"I know! I'll just rip the NerveGear off my head!" he then grasped at an invisible device above his head and tried to pull it off.
"I told you idiot, there is no way, trying to take the NerveGear off is like trying to move in your dreams and in full control, only when you are using NerveGear, it is more like a coma, completely unresponsive"
"So, we have to wait till they fix the bug?" asks Klein, I flinched, if it is anything for how long I tried to fix my television last summer...
"Or is someone from the real world removes the NerveGear" chips in Kirito.
"But I live alone..." Klein intones, "What about you guys?"
"My family should have seen me lying on the bed right now, knowing mum, she'll want to consult a doctor first before trying to remove it"
"My cousin is taking care of me, he isn't in much so it should be late in the evening at least" Robert says,
"I have a mum and a sister, so I should be noticed by dinnertime..." Kirito couldn't continue however, as Klein suddenly places his hands on Kirito's shoulders.
"H-how old is your sister?" he asks, suddenly looking a lot better.
"See?" I intone to Robert, "All he does is hit on anything with a skirt, nothing to do with me"
Robert however doesn't snipe back, he just stares out silently,
"GRH-AAAAAHHHHHH!" I looked back to see Klein had been kneed in the crotch and had fallen back, after struggling for a bit, he suddenly relaxes, "Oh, thats right, it doesn't hurt"
"Your perfect for each other" Robert mutters, I glare at him, but I see he was still thinking hard about the situation.
"But don't you find this weird" Kirito asks Klein,
"Of course I do, its a bug" Klein replies back,
"It isn't just a bug, if we can't log out, it will pose a serious problem to the game so early on"
"I see, your right"
"If they wanted to, they could just shut down all the server, and log everyone out"
But where does that leave me I think desperately,
"But not even an announcement has been about it" Robert chips in, he looks into his mailbox, "nothing to say whenever or not they are fixing the problem, I don't even have any spam mail received since coming here"
"It sounds like" I say in fear, "that we are completely cut from the world"
At that moment, the clouds parted to show eerie light across the plains, and a tolling of a bell echoed all over the landscape, we looked in the direction of the city, before suddenly I felt the breeze of the air disappear and my eyes gave way to shining light.
As the light faded, I stumbled back in shock since I was back in the Plaza of the Starting Cit. Tripping over my own feet I fell onto my backside, only to hear a laugh from earlier. Getting onto my feet and turned around to see the giant man who had helped me up when I had logged in.
"Still falling over, I see?" he grinned as he offered his hand. Getting back on my feet, I tried to stop myself from running in embarrassment.
"Yeah, I still need to get used to this" I said, I then looked around, "Do you have any idea what is going on?"
"No idea," He replied, "By the way I never introduced myself. I'm Agil."
Offering his hand, I shook it "Names Charlie," I replied.
Looking around for Robert I couldn't spot him in the crowds of people. Thats when I noticed that the entire place was packed with players, some arguing with each other and others asking if why they are here, and if they can log out.
Looking around, something caught my eye as I looked up to see a flashing red sign with the words Warning written on it. All of a sudden the sign seemed to multiply covering the sky checkering it with flashing signs showing the warning and system announcement.
Then a dark red liquid similar to blood in look started to ooze through the lines of the flashing signs. It fell down for a short amount of time, before it stopped in mid air and started to form together until the shape a of a giant man wearing a red cloak. Its hood covering a non existent face.
Mutterings cut through the crowd. Hearing the word Game Master, I knew it was one of the admins, but why was it missing a face?
"Players, I welcome you all to my world" it announced, sweeping its arms out. "My name is Kayaba Akihiko. Right now, I am the only person who can control this world." The now named Game Master continued in his calm and collected tone.
Staring at the creator of Sword Art Online in shock, I payed attention to his next words. "I think that most of you have discovered the fact that the Logout button has disappeared from the main menu. This is not a bug; it is all part of Sword Art Online system"
The muttering of the crowd increased. "You cannot log out of Sword Art Online yourself and no one on the outside can shut down or remove the Nervegear. Should this be attempted, the transmitter in the Nervegear will admit a powerful microwave destroying your brain and thus ending your life"
Silence reigned throughout the plaza waiting for Kayaba to continue."Is that possible?" I mutter to myself. "It could be" came the deep voice of Agil.
"To be a little more specific, disconnection from an outside source of electricity for ten minutes, being cut off from the system for more than two hours, or any attempt to: unlock, dismantle, or destroy the Nerve Gear. If any of these conditions are met, the brain destruction sequence will start."
"These conditions have been made known to the government and the public through mass-media in the outside world. On that note, there have been several cases where the relatives or friends have ignored the warnings and tried to forcefully remove the Nerve result regretfully 213 players have already exited this game, and the real world, forever""
Screams were heard around through the crowd and Agil behind me gasped
I looked on with shock, Japan might have got the message, but I live far away from there, if mum even gets the go ahead to take of my NerveGear.
"You'll die, and become number 214, another prime picking of the fucking graveyard"
I then pictured myself back with Robert, having the duel, if my spear had connected...
An image of Robert on the ground, health bar at zero, bursting into pieces of warped light.
I gagged at the thought.
"Players, there is no need to worry about the bodies you left on the other side. As of this moment, all TV, radio, and Internet media are repeatedly reporting this situation; including the fact that there have been numerous deaths. The danger of having your Nerve Gear taken off has already all but disappeared. In a moment, using the two hours I have provided, all of you will be transported to hospitals or similar institutes and be given the best treatment. So you can relax... and concentrate on beating the game."
"Beat the game?" Agil questioned. "He tells us we die here we die in reality and then tells us to beat the game? My wife is out there," he says with a slight sob,
I would have felt sympathy, but I was drowned in my own misery to do so, my mum, dad, sister, brother, they will take of that NerveGear, thinking I will be all right.
"Then you die the idiot"
"Players, there is only one way to be freed from this game. As I have said before, you must get to the top of Aincrad, the one hundredth floor, and defeat the final boss that resides there. All players still alive at that time will be immediately logged out of the game. I give you all my word"
No sound was heard through the plaza as Kayaba announced this. Then mutters broke out through the crowd. "Clear all hundred floors? In two months the beta testers didn't even get to floor 10!" a voice yelled from the crowd.
"Find Robert, he is the only way you are going to survive the fuck head!"
The cold logic of that was shocking, I was really useless here.
People stood there staring in shock all around me, some crying and others staring in disbelief. One or two people were on their knees praying. Beat a MMO without dieing? That's almost impossible.
"Then I will show you evidence that this is the only reality. In your inventories, there will be a gift from me to all 9,787 of you. Please accept this," the calm tones of Kayaba broke through the crowds mutterings.
"How can that asshole be so calm, he basically told us to go fuck ourselves in the middle of a fucking monster infested breeding ground, AND WE'RE THE MAIN COURSE!"
Inner me was acting up again, always at times like this when I am panicking that I turn into a version of Sakura from Naruto, calm on the outside, violent on the in.
Opening my inventory and found all that was there was my armour and spear, along with a few dropped items from the Boar's I attacked, but nothing.
Suddenly light shone from every direction blinding me. As it dimmed down I looked around. The once impressive ban of fantasy warriors were replaced with fat teenagers, skinny nerds and the like. Most female avatars had turned into men as cries of shock came from several people as the girls they were trying to seduce turned into middle aged men.
"As predicted, if this is our army to get to floor 100, then we might as well fuck ourselves with sword for the good they will do for us"
The sound of sobbing came from behind me, turning around I saw a man, as tall as Agil crying behind me. "M...M...MY HAIR!" came a cry from him as I saw him lift his head, looking almost identical to his avatar but was missing all the hair on top of his head.
Face faulting for a second I realise this was just his way of coping with the sudden predicament and trying to shift his worries of being trapped inside a death game away from friends and family to something small and insignificant.
In his hand there was a mirror, looking around I discovered that all the other players also possessed a similar item themselves, but why didn't I get one?
Wait, I then realised I didn't have an official game, it was copied from Roberts original by his and my expertise, so most probably, Kayaba thought there would be only 10 000 here today, but in fact, there was 10 001.
Looking at that logic, everyone but me has been forced into their real life form, while I am still in my avatar because I had an illegal copy on a server that doesn't exist.
And so...
…
…
I'M STUCK AS A GIRL!?
"No fucking way! That shit doesn't happen in life! It happens to guys who wish wrongly while a thick headed goddess is nearby, it happens to guys who are the wrong side of an alien experiment, it happens to guys who fall into cursed springs, it happens to people who are sucked into a game of life and...
Death.
I fall to my knees.
"This shit is actually happening..."
"I am going to die..." I muttered,
"We're going to fucking die, kick the bucket, and not temporary, not only that, people aren't going to be able to tell you died here, you are just a lousy kid from one hundred miles away, and will become a toadstool forever afterwards, and people that know you hear, was just a whiney, weak bitch with big boobs, and that is all she wrote"
I fall on my side, not registering the screams from other players at their despair, I just curled up into a ball, and did what I haven't done since I was ten, seven years ago.
I cried.
"Hey? You ok?" a surprisingly calm voice I recognised whispered in my ear. "I know you lost your balls but no need to act like this."
I peeked out of my hands to look at Robert, not giving a smile, but still attempting humour.
"C'mon get up, we have to get going. This place is going to turn into a war zone soon when reality hits them." he continued helping me to my feet. "We need to leave."
I looked at him blankly before looking at the floor.
"Just go on without me, I'm useless, reckless, I'll just get you killed"
He shakes his head before I'm done talking, "Don't you remember that funny nickname of yours?"
I look back at him.
"The soldier and the ninja, you break in and hit hard, I pick up the pieces and clean the mess, we're a team, in real life and here, and I'll be damned if I leave you behind, what if your mother finds out?"
I gave a weak chuckle.
"No seriously that women scares me,"
I laugh a little harder.
"So?" He holds out his hand, "This better be the last time I pick you off the ground"
I remember how I grasped his hand without hesitation, and do you know what?
Ever since then, I have never fallen to the ground again.
