I opened the door slowly.. He stood there silently, golden hair covering his face. I knew what has happened but still , I didn`t excpect him to come..
"So..he died eh?"
He looked at me with blank face . It was perfectly emotionless , but I could see the unbearable pain in his eyes..it was just like when he lost his parents.
"come in.."
Soubi went to the corner of the room and sat down on the small chair. He looked around like he was there for the firts time…
"so you came back to me?"
"I don`t have any other place to go.."
He still tried to hide it , but I could hear the hurt in his voice.. I always knew how he felt. Soubi-kun.. I remembered the small sobbing child who was left alone and had only me. I was too cruel then. Was it same now?... Did Seimei really mean so much for him? Soubi-kun.. I went to the chair and patted his head.. I could imagine his ears flatten against his head. I couldn`t let him be broken now, it was me who made him strong. I didn`t know how to be gentle and caring , but I could do one thing_control him. That was what Soubi really needed.
"You can stay here Soubi-kun. You still belong to me"
He nodded.
I was going to leave when suddenly he wrapped arms around my waist, burring his face in my belly.
"Stop it Soubi-kun!"
I didn`t want to see him like that.. I couldn`t comfort him.. I wasn`t kind.
"I…I am sorry…Sensei" he whispered, still not letting me go...it sounded broken.
I lifted up his face with one hand… it was covered with tears. I hadn`t seen him crying since he was little… Suddenly it hurt. It hurt too much and I couldn`t take it. I knelled in front of him and hugged him. Throwing his arms around me he buried his face in my chest. I could feel him trembling. It was the same again..like holding a frightened kid. He would always stay a gentle child for me. But I couldn`t allow this weakness to last..
"Seimei died Soubi-kun. You should understand it"
He stopped trembling. I stood up and left the room. It was the same as many years ago but somehow now it hurt more.
so here`s another depressive story. I don`t really like it , but rewievs would still be nice..
