"The Kiss That Lingered"

by cay-z

Author's note: Before reading this, I would advice you to first read (and review .) I love you because I hate you.

Just because you might get a bit confused. Oh and please don't hate me for making a point in something so shocking... .

Enjoy .

Oh! Fair warning, I love you because i hate you is what happened before this story in Shinn's pov, Cagalli and Athrun's pre-the lingering kiss pov story? Well, they're coming up. i just really had the itch to publish this. Now it's your decision to go on or just wait for Cagalli and Athrun. Honestly I think that this story stands on its own with i love you because i hate you, but it would show a whole lot more sense if you would wait for Cagalli and Athrun...

Or maybe it won't... hmmmmm...

Chapter 1: Shinn Asuka

I left her there, not wanting to look back. I just left her there.

I hate you because I love you…

When I turned the corner, I ran. She wasn't following me, but she could have been. I ran as fast as my legs could carry me, and being a coordinator, it was a very far run. I ran away.

I hate you because I love you…

I tried to make myself believe that I hadn't done it, that I said nothing to her.

I hate you because I love you…

But nothing can change the facts. It happened, I did it, I told her.

I hate you because I love you…

How I felt for her.

I hate you because I love you…

I hated her because I loved her.

I hate you because I love you…

I ran, ran far away, from the battle in my heart. She should be nothing to me, nothing.

I hate you because I love you…

I should stop my feelings for her from growing any more, I have to destroy those feelings. I ran.

I hate you because I love you…

I ran as far as I can get. I shouldn't get attached to her.

I hate you because I love you…

She belonged to someone.

I hate you because I love you…

She belonged to Orb, she belonged to him.

I hate you because I love you…

I could never win her, never have her.

I hate you because I love you…

From the only battle that I could never win.

I hate you because I love you…


Chapter 2: Cagalli Yula Attha

I hate you because I love you…

I stood there alone, my hand clutching my chest, my breathing hard and sharp.

I hate you because I love you…

I leaned on the wall, not able to support my own weight. I felt myself slide down, but I let it.

I hate you because I love you…

I just sat there. Letting the words sink in, he said he loved me.

I hate you because I love you…

He left after what he did, he just left, without any other explanation.

I hate you because I love you…

Athrun has never told me he loved me. I wanted to cry, but I promised myself I would be strong.

I hate you because I love you…

I shouldn't be confused like this. Just because he said those things. I'm Cagalli Yula Attha, the lioness of Orb, I should be able to handle this.

I hate you because I love you…

This shouldn't bother me the least.

I hate you because I love you…

But why in the world did it? I felt confused, so confused.

I hate you because I love you…

He hates me because he loves me. Should I be feeling regret for asking him? If I hadn't I wouldn't have found out, he wouldn't have told me.

I hate you because I love you…

But somehow, I felt relieved.

I hate you because I love you…

He hates me…

I hate you because I love you…

Because he loves me…

I hate you because I love you…

He may hate me, but he said he loves me.

I hate you because I love you…

Athrun never said he loved me. He never told me he loved me.

I hate you because I love you…

His words kept repeating itself in my head like a broken record. I wanted it to stop.

I hate you because I love you…

But I can't.

I hate you because I love you…

And oddly enough, I feel like I'm enjoying it. Should I be?

I hate you because I love you…

I tried closing my eyes to make it stop, but it doesn't. It gets stronger.

I hate you because I love you…

I tried thinking of Athrun, picturing me in his arms, my head in his chest.

I hate you because I love you…

But when I would look up, it wasn't Athrun, it was him.

I hate you because I love you…

When I looked up, I saw ruby red eyes, not green. I saw raven black hair, not dark blue.

I had to get away.

I stood up awkwardly, leaning hard on the wall.

I hate you because I love you…

I walked to the room I shared with Athrun, I walked slowly.

I hate you because I love you…

When I went in, Athrun wasn't there. Maybe he was still down at the hangar.

I hate you because I love you…

I flopped down on his bed, burying my head into his pillow, trying to get the scent of his hair. It was there.

I hate you because I love you…

I took a long hard whiff of it.

I hate you because I love you…

I wrapped myself in his blanket.

I hate you because I love you…

And closed my eyes, trying so hard to get those words out of my head.

I hate you because I love you…

But I can't. I could never. He said he loved me, but I love someone else. Then why am I feeling this?

I hate you because I love you…

How come I feel this way?

I am so confused.


Chapter 3: Athrun Zala

I hate you because I love you…

I hate him.

I hate you because I love you…

He had no right to do it.

I hate you because I love you…

But then why am I not chasing him?

I hate you because I love you…

Why do I just stare at her and not hurt him?

I hate you because I love you…

He pushed himself unto her, I should be chasing him, punching him the least.

I hate you because I love you…

But I just stare at her.

I hate you because I love you…

That's what he said. And I hate him for it. How dare he touch her like that? He had no right whatsoever. None whatsoever.

I hate you because I love you…

I stared at her, leaning on the wall. She started sliding down. I wanted to grab her, support her like what I should really be doing. But I just stared down at her.

I hate you because I love you…

I stared long and hard, and when she stood up, and when she started walking, I followed her. In the shadows, I followed her.

I hate you because I love you…

I didn't want her to see me, not yet.

I hate you because I love you…

Not just yet. I saw her enter our room, still silent, very much still.

I hate you because I love you…

And I just stood there. I wanted to go inside, but what should I do? Should I tell her I saw what happened? Or should I act like nothing happened? Like I was very much oblivious of how he felt for her?

I hate you because I love you…

I was relieved when I found out that Kira was her brother, relieved when I found out that only a handful of guys including me actually preferred fiery girls like her, I was relieved to have her.

I hate you because I love you…

I love her too.

I hate you because I love you…

I love her more.

I hate you because I love you…

He can't have her.

I hate you because I love you…

I took a deep breath, opened our door, and stepped in. She was laying down on my bed, her head buried in my pillow, her body wrapped in my blanket.

I hate you because I love you…

She lay still, eyes closed.

I hate you because I love you…

I sat down beside her, stroking her blonde hair, letting her hair fall through my fingers. She looked up at me, her eyes wide and tired.

I hate you because I love you…

I gathered her up in my arms, then kissed her, hard on the lips.

I hate you because I love you…

I may not be able to say it, but it's there.

I hate you because I love you…

She wrapped her hands at the back of my neck.

I hate you because I love you…

He can never have her. He may be able to say it, but she's mine. He can never have her because…

I love her.