Disclaimer: I own nothing, not Buffy, not Spike, nothing….but you knew that
As Buffy Summers wondered around Sunnydale aimlessly, the misty rain fell on her face, camouflaging the tears that ran down her cheeks. She wasn't really crying, for she made no sound, yet there seemed to be no end to the tiny droplets that fell from her eyes.
She hadn't noticed that she was being followed. Didn't hear the quiet footsteps behind her, protecting her from the night. All she could hear was the rain as it hit the pavement, and the sound of water slapping on the floor with every step she took. It seemed like she'd been walking around for hours just listening to the sound her footsteps made as they hit the puddles.
He'd been following her since she left the hospital that night. He knew she wasn't well. This was too much for any one person to handle alone, even the Slayer.
He kept his distance. Staying a block behind her at every interval; giving her space. He knew he was needed. The very fact that she hadn't noticed him proved enough that he was needed.
Buffy walked into the deserted children's park, watching as the wind pushed empty swings back and forth. It was an eerie sight to see. She watched on, imagining how many children would never play on those swings if she couldn't win this fight. How many would die?
She tried to push those thoughts aside, but couldn't help herself. Tonight had been the first time that she truly doubted whether or not she could win this battle.
As she walked over to the squeaky swings she saw him in the distance. His platinum hair was glistening in the rain. She looked his way and stared into his eyes from afar. She understood the pain in those deep icy blue eyes, partially because she was feeling it to, partially because she always felt what feelings were deep inside of him, they were connected. Her and Spike shared something that was unexplainable.
Spike walked over to where Buffy was sitting on the swings and sat on a bench facing her. Watching as she peddled her feet back and forth slightly, seeing the tears stream down her face as she did. He wanted to hold her, to comfort her- but he wasn't sure what to do. She looked so lost. He wanted to kiss her lips and make the pain go away, to make her forget…at least for a little while. Seeing her there, crying…he couldn't stand it. He had to help her.
"How did you find me," she asked, as she looked up into his eyes again.
"I followed you, love. I couldn't have you just roaming about. I had to watch over my girl," Spike answered as he searched the pain in her face for some sort of reaction. She was needing him right now and he knew it. Question was, would she be willing to admit it.
She didn't know quite how to respond. She didn't want to argue the fact that she wasn't his girl. There were too many other important things going on. Instead, she forced a smile through her tears.
"You saved his life…I'll never forget…" She quickly looked down towards the floor as the emotion overwhelmed her. Xander had proved himself over and over again. He never felt his role was important, didn't realize how necessary he was to their close knit group, but she would never have made it this far without him. He was more than a friend, he was family.
"He lost an eye, but it could have been so much worse. He could have lost his life tonight Spike, and it would have been all my fault, but you saved him. I sent them in there…all of them. I knew they weren't ready."
"Don't! Don't do that to yourself. You had no choice but to go in there, and you know it. You went in there fighting, it's your job, you're the slayer." Spike stood and took a few steps closer to where Buffy sat on the swing.
Buffy kept pushing herself back and forth. The chains rattling and the sound of the rust echoing in the night. The rain was falling heavier now, matting her blond curls to her face and neck. Her clothes fit like second skin. She shivered slightly from the comment.
"I'm a slayer Spike, not the Slayer- don't tell me you forgot about Faith, you two looked so close before," she shot at him as he winced from the remark. "I'm sorry…that was uncalled for. Besides, it's my job to protect those girls, not to send them off to their deaths."
"They had to be tested sooner or later, you know. At least you found something out tonight. This preacher fellow, Caleb whatever, he's strong- but he's a man. You can fight him. He may have the first on his side, but you can cause him pain. As for Faith…she's insignificant. You're the Slayer Buffy, and you know it. She knows it too."
Spike reached his hand out the grab the chain supporting the swing. He held it tight to keep Buffy from moving back again. They were both drenched, but oblivious to the downpour as they stared at one another for what seemed like forever.
"You did what you had to do," he said as he leaned in closer to her face, "you did what was right. None of what happened is your fault. It needed to be done, if not now, soon. At least now you know what you're dealing with."
Buffy reached up and embraced him, wrapping her arms around him as she allowed her head to collapse against his chest. He could feel her shudder against him as the tears poured out. He held on to her tight and ran his hand through her hair. "Shhhh, Buffy. No worries. I'm not going to let anything happen to my girl," he said as he placed his lips to the top of her head in a soft kiss. "Let's get you home then, love. It'd be wise to get you out of those wet clothes."
(TBC)
