Title: Do You Hear Me?

Pairing: Alex Cabot/Olivia Benson

Summary: "Well it's all so overrated/In not saying how you feel/So you end up watching chances fade/And wondering what's real/And I give you just a little time/I wonder if you realize/I've been waiting till I see it in your eyes" – Michelle Branch, "Breathe" / Or: Alex and Olivia and a coming home of sorts (Post Sunk Cost Fallacy)


There are 637 saved drafts in Alex's personal email; each one starts out the same: Dear Olivia, I'm sorry it's been so long. There's so much I need to tell you. From there, there are always two categories: the emails in which she asks Olivia to lunch so she can explain everything, and the emails in which she just spills her guts all over the page. She never even considers sending any of them.

Tonight is different. The past few weeks have been different. Seeing Olivia again, touching her again, after all these years reminded Alex of just how hard the universe works to bring them back together every single time they are ripped apart. Like fate. Like destiny. Like soulmates.

Dear Olivia,

I miss you.

Simple. Honest. Easy to send. Easy to send. She should send it. Get it out there. Put the ball in Olivia's court. Stop dancing around this great unspoken thing.

There are 638 saved drafts in Alex's personal email; each one starts out the same: Dear Olivia.

She tells herself it's better this way – for the both of them. If they were really meant to be together, the universe wouldn't try so hard to keep them apart. But even as she locks her phone and drops her empty wine glass into the sink, she doesn't believe any of that.

She sleeps fitfully, like she is being reprimanded for holding herself back yet again. She wakes up exhausted but determined. She unlocks her phone, selects the draft from the night before, and presses send before she can overthink.

Just breathe, she thinks. The ball is in Olivia's court now. Even if Olivia chooses not to respond at least Alex knows she did her best.

But, maybe miraculously, Olivia does respond, just a couple hours later. Dinner? My place? I'll get a sitter. 7:00

Sounds perfect, Alex replies.

Standing in front of Olivia's door at 6:52 with a bouquet of flowers, Alex feels ridiculous. For them to be starting over again after all these years…it's almost unbelievable. Almost.

Olivia opens the door with flour on her cheek and her face flushed. Her hair is only half done, but she's more beautiful than anyone Alex has ever seen. "Come on in," she says. "I was just finishing up."

But Alex doesn't move. She's rooted to the spot now, just staring. Everything they've been through has brought them to this moment. The flowers tumble from her hand. Just breathe. "I love you," she says, breathless, like it's the first time all over again. "I love you, and I can't imagine spending my life with anyone but you."

Olivia stands stock-still, hand on the doorknob. For a long moment, Alex isn't sure if she's going to have the door slammed in her face, but then Olivia smiles wide and light. And, oh, Alex was wrong: this is the most beautiful Olivia has ever looked. She steps forward, cups Alex's face, and presses a kiss to her lips. It's quick, over almost as fast as it started, but when Olivia pulls back she is still smiling. "Come in, Alex," she says.

And Alex does.

One night, months later, Alex closes her laptop and sets it on the coffee table. She settles into her spot beside Olivia on the couch and leans up to press a kiss to Olivia's jaw.

There are zero saved drafts in her personal email.


AN: Hey, thanks for reading! Just a quick FYI: this is probably the only story I'll be posting for like the next year. I'm taking part in a 52 Weeks, 52 Stories challenge which I'm posting about over at itaxiacorpseries on tumblr if you're interested in checking that out.