"Uncle Won, why is Chudley spelled wrong? It says C-H-U-D-L-E-I-G-H, but we are here to see the C-H-U-D-L-E-Y Cannons."
"Harry mate, are you sure Lily is yours and Ginny's kid? She must be hanging around Hermione too much. When she goes off to Hogwarts she will trap herself in the library."
"Uncle Won! I can hear you. Now answer my question!"
"Well the Chudley Cannons weren't actually founded in Chudley. They were actually founded by a man named Walter Chudley who had had too much fire...fizzy drink."
"Uncle Won, I know what firewhiskey is. I'm not three."
"No, Lily, you are four. How do you know what firewhiskey is?" Harry cut in.
"Uncle George. Now get back to the story, Uncle Won."
"Fine. Fine...
Walter Chudley was known from Northumberland to Wiltshire as the finest chaser to ever play Quidditch. It is rumoured that he could outscore a seeker singlehandedly. Quidditch teams from all over the world tried to recruit him but he looked upon them with disdain. Disgusted with the other teams Walter decided to just form his own from his old Ravenclaw team. The team in itself was not the best but they had never lost a match because no one could score like Chudley. To register as an official team however they needed a name.
They weren't based out of a city so that wouldn't work. They decided to solve their problem like they solved everything else, getting as drunk as physically possible and going from there. In the middle of the pub Chudley stood up on the table and shouted as loud as he could, "I can shoot a Quaffle faster than it can shoot of a cannon! I am a bloody Chudley Cannon. Worship me! Worship me my Cannons! If you worship me we shall conquer! Cannon Chudley. Walter "The Cannon" Chudley! You are my CHUDLEY CANNONS!" The team decided that what could be a better name for a team than one named after their captain."
"Uncle Won, that doesn't tell me why Chudleigh is spelled wrong!"
"I'm getting to it, Lily. Anyway...
The Chudley Cannons went to the IOQA, that is the International Office of Quidditch Affairs, and registered. The Chudley Cannons were ready to conquer everyone from the Falcons to the Arrows.
The first thirteen years after it was founded the Cannons lost 3 League Cups, causing Walter to grow more and more frustrated. How could they not be undefeated? The third year they lost to Ballycastle, the eighth to Puddlemere, the ninth to the Magpies. Now it was them against the Falcons, the last time they played them their seeker had only just caught the snitch in time and they had been barely ahead in points. Now this round the Falcons seeker had snagged the snitch and they were waiting on a final score.
Walter was getting more and more drunk. He knew he was going to lose, he kept going over the points in his head, and the Falcons captain seemed to know it too.
Eventually he got tired of waiting and went to storm off to their home pitch. It was in the backyard of his mansion. It might not have been that professional if his yard wasn't the size of the Hogwarts grounds.
He went to the fireplace and threw in the floo powder. "Chudley Mmannooer," he slurred, too drunk to say where he wanted to go. He stepped into the green flames and was gone in a woosh of flames.
He walked out of the fireplace and sat down in his plush comfy chair in his parlour and slept. He was awoken the next morning with a massive hangover in an unfamiliar room by an unfamiliar person.
"Who are you and what are you doing in my house?" he groaned sitting up, "And what have you done with my chair?"
"I am the mayor of Chudleigh in Devon, may I ask how you got in here, sir? I locked my office last night yet here you are, almost like magic!"
"Of course it is magic, have you never heard of the floo?" grumbled Walter.
"Mr. Mayor, I think he is just very drunk. Let me escort him out of your office."
"Very well, Doris. You deal with him, dunk his head in ice water or something. That should do the trick."
Doris guided Walter out of the Mayor's office and into the street before taking out her wand and mubbling a spell. "What in Merlin's name do you think you are doing? Showing up in muggle Chudleigh raving about magic! You are lucky I didn't have to call in the Obliviators!"
"Do you know who I am? I am Walter Chudley, best chaser in the world! Now bring me back to my house! How did I get here?"
"That would explain it. You messed up the floo didn't you. You are in Chudleigh in Devon. You were never at your house."
"They named a town after me! I knew I was famous but I didn't know I was that famous. Wait until the boys here about this!"
"No, Mr. Chudley, Chudleigh has been around a lot longer than your Quidditch career. We have a proud history here, and it has nothing to do with you."
"Fine, whatever. Do you know where I can find out the results of the game?"
"We only get sports news once a week, Mr. Chudley. This town isn't known for Quidditch like Falmouth is."
"Do you at least have somewhere I can floo out of here from?"
"You are far too drunk to floo, you will stay here at the Crooked Broom for the day and you can go home when you can walk straight."
And he did go home eventually and he and the team had a good old laugh over how there was a town named after them. After Walter Chudley's death and the Great Fire of Chudleigh that destroyed the entire town, the Chudley Cannons moved to Chudleigh to help rebuild and eventually became an integral part of Wizarding Chudleigh.
And that is why the Chudley Cannons are out of Chudleigh, Devon."
"That's cool, Uncle Won! But did the Cannons beat the Falcons?"
"Just wait and see."
If you are part of the Quidditch League Fanfiction competition you will know this is seriously meta. I do not know when the Cannons won certain games but for the purpose of this story it was based of the results from the comp.
It has been a great season and I love all my Cannons and I am so grateful to have met everyone involved.
