Disclaimer: I don't own any of Squaresoft's characters... no matter how much I beg and scream and bloviate... *sigh* Lyrics provided by the one and only, Anime Lyrics.com.
AN: Beware! This fic is very demented and has shonen ai/reverse lolita complex stuff in it. If you don't know what all that means, then don't blame me for being traumatized after reading this. Remember, it's only for fun ^_^. And to all the Sora fans, beware of character bashing and extreme OOCness. I love Sora, but he's just so easy to make fun of, so forgive me! Now, on with the story! (Oh, and this is a one-shot, so no sequels!)
Sora: Who would want a sequel to this? You evil, HEARTLESS authoress!!!
Otaku-Chan ^_~: Why thank you!
Kingdom Heartthrob
By Otaku-Chan ^_~
Sora wiped the little beads of perspiration off of his forehead as he awaited his next challenge. The atmosphere of the arena seemed heavy and very quiet. His heart was pounding with anticipation.
'So, I've finally made it to the Platinum Match. I wonder who'll be my opponent,' Sora thought as he readied his keyblade for the upcoming battle. When the silence was broken by a strange sound up above him, his gaze averted upwards towards the purplish haze of the early evening sky. Then he blinked, wondering if he was hallucinating those funny little specks of light that seemed to dance around each other before coming together to create a brilliant magical platform that was spinning with all of it's intricate patterns. Sora's breath nearly caught in his throat. Whoever his challenger was sure knew how to make an entrance.
Suddenly, a blinding white beam of light shot down from the platform, slamming hard into the ground, causing a slight tremor of the arena floor. Sora began to feel excitement and fear wash over his small body. As the light dissipated, a black lump of something was crouched down low to the ground, it's back facing Sora. Long silvery locks of hair cascaded down the person's back like a waterfall of silk. Then, as the ethereal being stood up, black leather crinkling as it did so, Sora was mesmerized. A singular black wing on the beings right upper back extended along with the person's right arm (Sora couldn't tell if it was a man or a woman yet ^.^;).
As the dangerous, yet angelic looking turquoise eyes met Sora's, the sixteen-year-old-desperately-in-need-of-a-growthspurt-pre-pubescent-little- boy knew what he was feeling had to be true. "I'm in love." Yes, Sora knew a gorgeous person when he saw one, and he quickly wiped away the small bit of drool that began sliding out of his mouth. His heart was doing flip- flops and his breathing increased to almost panting. One could've sworn they saw hearts in his eyes. (Aww, Sora's first true love ^_~).
Suddenly, strange music began playing from seemingly nowhere...
Estuans interius ira vehementi Estuans interius ira vehementi
Sephiroth Sephiroth
"Wow! You have your own theme music! I'm so jealous! So, your name is Sephiroth? That's such a cool name! Hey, I just thought of something... both of our names start with 'S,' isn't that cool?" Sora kept rambling on, not noticing the six foot Masamune katana that the dark angel was unsheathing.
Sors immanis Et inanis Sors immanis Et inanis
"Hmph. You will not win this battle," the man said smoothly (Sora now confirmed that it was a man due to his deep, manly voice ^.~).
Veni, veni, venias, Ne me mori facias Veni, veni, venias, Ne me mori facias
Sora didn't seem to register what the man said, being too engrossed at the thought of how sexy the man's voice sounded. It was at that moment that he wished he had taken those steroids Riku offered him. Then, perhaps he'd be a little taller and stronger. *Sigh* Would this Sephiroth guy accept his love, even though he was so small? Sometimes he felt like his keyblade made up for something he lacked... (@_@ whoa... poor kid... )
Veni, veni, venias, (Gloriosa) Ne me mori facias (Generosa) Veni, veni, venias, (Gloriosa) Ne me mori facias (Generosa)
Sephiroth Sephiroth
"Now, you die."
Sora didn't even see the long blade coming until the last second when he quickly jumped, just barely avoiding having his twiggy legs cut off. As Sephiroth got closer to him, he smirked. The boy looked like a Cloud/Squall hybrid, how fascinating. Perhaps he was their offspring? Hah! Whatever the case, this puny boy would be no match for the great Sephiroth and his long sword... (*Bats away screaming fan girls, or guys ^.^* I'm talking about the Masamune, not his OTHER sword, ok people? ^__^)
"Well... I guess I have to fight you since I worked so hard to get here, but after the fight, we can become good 'friends,' right? (You mean yaoi lover, don't you?)
Sora looked around for the odd female voice that kept making such mean comments about him. "Listen authoress-lady-person, my preference for drop dead sexy bishounen clad in black leather is none of your damn business!" He shouted, blushing prettily. Sephiroth merely sighed, looking quite bored at the moment.
(Oh? Is it now? Well then, I guess I'll have to become more than an evil authoress and REALLY have some fun with you! I'll become an evil NARRATOR that makes you do things entirely against your will! Muahahahahahahaha!!!)
Swallowing a gulp of air, Sora's brows furrowed. Now what would happen?
(Suddenly, Sephiroth leapt onto Sora and glomped him... for starters... )
"H-Hey! I-I'm not ready to go all the way yet! Oh, Sephiroth! Sh-Shouldn't we get married before we do this?" Sora sighed in pleasure as the man kissed his neck gently.
'What the #%&* am I doing?! I can't stop myself!' Sephiroth thought in a panic. His hands were moving without his consent, and he was practically making out with the kid! If anyone ever found out about this, he'd be ruined! He tried desperately to gain control of his body, but the evil authoress/narrator would not let up. To his horror, he began to remove Sora's coat... then his shirt...
"I-I love you, Sephiroth, really, I do, but... I've never done this before, and..."
Sephiroth silenced Sora with a searing kiss, molding their lips together as his hands explored the boy's smooth, flawless chest. At that moment, Sora gave into the pleasure he was receiving from the angelic bishounen. After all, what was the likeliness that Sephiroth would return his feelings like this? Ok, so even if it was the authoress/narrator's doing, this wasn't so bad...
(Oh, it only gets better ^_~. At the moment the two were sharing that heated kiss, Riku was mysteriously teleported, from wherever the hell he was, to the arena, to witness, with wide, disbelieving eyes, the only person he ever desired, making out with the coolest villian ever created by his mother company Squaresoft. It was too cruel!)
"Sora... how could you?"
Hearing that familiar voice, Sora abruptly ended the kiss and turned to see Riku, looking deeply hurt, and really pissed.
Sephiroth slowly stood up. This new boy seemed strong... "I will not let you take my yaoi lover before I have fully claimed him!" On the inside, Sephiroth was cursing his misfortune. 'Why? Why?! How could I have said such a thing?! How could I have kissed that puny rodent?! AAAARRRRGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!'
(Calm down now Sephy, there is a medication called Prozac, which I'll give out to everyone when this fic is over... )
"Listen Sephiroth, I don't know what made you decide on Sora as your yaoi lover, but I'll tell you this, his ass is mine!" Riku shouted, pulling out his own weapon.
Sora blushed deeply. Did Riku really feel that way about him? Was he about to be involved in a love triangle? (*Gasp!*) "R-Riku... I... I didn't know you felt that way."
"Sora, from the moment we first met, I felt connected to you in a special way. To me, you will always be more than a friend, but now... why? Why are you doing this with a man you've probably just met? Don't I mean anything to you?"
"Riku, this is all just a big misunderstanding! It's the evil authoress/narrator that's making us do this, I swear!"
Sephiroth grinned, "So when you said you loved me... that was all a lie created by the authoress? I could've sworn that happened BEFORE she decided to control us. You truly are a fickle little boy."
Riku glared at Sephiroth, then at Sora. "Is this true?"
Sora fidgeted nervously with his feet, looking down at the ground. "Well... "
"Yes or no?" Riku demanded, startling Sora out of his thoughts.
"Yes. I admit it. I am in love with Sephiroth. I'm sorry Riku, but we were never meant to be." Sora picked up his keyblade, ready to fight if need be. Riku merely laughed, a sad laugh that shook his entire being. So, he was being rejected? He knew he had to do something about that, even if it meant hurting the one he loved. Sora couldn't have meant it, could he?
Then, leaping into the air, Riku prepared to attack Sephiroth. Sora wasn't prepared for what was about to happen next...
"Riku... you know, for a little boy such as yourself, you are really well- built... not to mention handsome, " Sephiroth said in a seductive voice. "Perhaps I'll take you as my yaoi lover instead of Sora."
(OOOHHH....now we have a real love triangle!)
Riku's heart nearly skipped a beat as the beautiful he/she looking creature smiled at him. What did he just say? He wanted him to be his yaoi lover? This was just too weird! "Sorry, but I can't love anything that looks female, so take this!" he shouted as he prepared to strike Sephiroth with his own keyblade.
Estuans interius ira vehementi Estuans interius ira vehementi
Sephiroth Sephiroth
Sora felt left out... and the music was starting to get on his nerves. 'How did everything wind up like this? And I was about to score! Damn it!'
Sors immanis Et inanis Sors immanis Et inanis
"Sing in English dammit! I can't understand Latin!" he pouted as he sat down and put his shirt and coat back on.
(Now, now Sora, too much stress is not good for you. Here, take this. It'll make you feel better ^_~ *A bottle of some pills magically appears in Sora's lap*)
Sora sighed in defeat and without a second thought, popped a pill. Hmmm, he was feeling a bit better... a bit different, too. Suddenly his body grew taller, muscles he never knew he had became more defined, and Loa and behold, he was an adult!
(See? Now Sephiroth will surely want you again! Maybe even Riku too! Go get 'em tiger!)
With renewed determination, Sora set out to stop the quarreling men and make his new self become known. "SEEEEEEPPPPPHHHHYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!! RRRRIIIIIIIIIKKKKKKKUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Look at meeee!" he yelled, jolting both guys out of their heated battle. Eyes opened wide at the sight of the new (and improved) Sora. Sephiroth dropped his sword, and Riku did likewise with his keyblade. Slowly, the two men walked up to Sora, blushes on their pretty faces.
"I'm in love."
"Me too."
Sora smiled. It was wonderful to be loved, but who would he choose? Both men looked promising, and he did know Riku longer than Sephiroth, but...
(How bout I make the decision for you? ^_~)
Before Sora could get out another word, both men glomped him. Well, if you can't have just one, take both!
And so, the tournament was canceled, and later on, the three men went to Traverse Town to declare their love to all. Unfortunately, many didn't want to attend the wedding... (Gee, I wonder why?) Cloud was in tears that his beloved Sephiroth was in love with another, and Kairi, well, being on an isolated island, had no clue anyway as to what was going on, so we'll just forget about her. And so, the three-some couple of bishounen lived happily ever after, shaming Disney by their un-straightness ^_^. Ah, isn't love wonderful?
~Owari~ The End
AN: That was scary. Well, If you've read this to the end, please do whatcha gotta do, and R+R!
AN: Beware! This fic is very demented and has shonen ai/reverse lolita complex stuff in it. If you don't know what all that means, then don't blame me for being traumatized after reading this. Remember, it's only for fun ^_^. And to all the Sora fans, beware of character bashing and extreme OOCness. I love Sora, but he's just so easy to make fun of, so forgive me! Now, on with the story! (Oh, and this is a one-shot, so no sequels!)
Sora: Who would want a sequel to this? You evil, HEARTLESS authoress!!!
Otaku-Chan ^_~: Why thank you!
Kingdom Heartthrob
By Otaku-Chan ^_~
Sora wiped the little beads of perspiration off of his forehead as he awaited his next challenge. The atmosphere of the arena seemed heavy and very quiet. His heart was pounding with anticipation.
'So, I've finally made it to the Platinum Match. I wonder who'll be my opponent,' Sora thought as he readied his keyblade for the upcoming battle. When the silence was broken by a strange sound up above him, his gaze averted upwards towards the purplish haze of the early evening sky. Then he blinked, wondering if he was hallucinating those funny little specks of light that seemed to dance around each other before coming together to create a brilliant magical platform that was spinning with all of it's intricate patterns. Sora's breath nearly caught in his throat. Whoever his challenger was sure knew how to make an entrance.
Suddenly, a blinding white beam of light shot down from the platform, slamming hard into the ground, causing a slight tremor of the arena floor. Sora began to feel excitement and fear wash over his small body. As the light dissipated, a black lump of something was crouched down low to the ground, it's back facing Sora. Long silvery locks of hair cascaded down the person's back like a waterfall of silk. Then, as the ethereal being stood up, black leather crinkling as it did so, Sora was mesmerized. A singular black wing on the beings right upper back extended along with the person's right arm (Sora couldn't tell if it was a man or a woman yet ^.^;).
As the dangerous, yet angelic looking turquoise eyes met Sora's, the sixteen-year-old-desperately-in-need-of-a-growthspurt-pre-pubescent-little- boy knew what he was feeling had to be true. "I'm in love." Yes, Sora knew a gorgeous person when he saw one, and he quickly wiped away the small bit of drool that began sliding out of his mouth. His heart was doing flip- flops and his breathing increased to almost panting. One could've sworn they saw hearts in his eyes. (Aww, Sora's first true love ^_~).
Suddenly, strange music began playing from seemingly nowhere...
Estuans interius ira vehementi Estuans interius ira vehementi
Sephiroth Sephiroth
"Wow! You have your own theme music! I'm so jealous! So, your name is Sephiroth? That's such a cool name! Hey, I just thought of something... both of our names start with 'S,' isn't that cool?" Sora kept rambling on, not noticing the six foot Masamune katana that the dark angel was unsheathing.
Sors immanis Et inanis Sors immanis Et inanis
"Hmph. You will not win this battle," the man said smoothly (Sora now confirmed that it was a man due to his deep, manly voice ^.~).
Veni, veni, venias, Ne me mori facias Veni, veni, venias, Ne me mori facias
Sora didn't seem to register what the man said, being too engrossed at the thought of how sexy the man's voice sounded. It was at that moment that he wished he had taken those steroids Riku offered him. Then, perhaps he'd be a little taller and stronger. *Sigh* Would this Sephiroth guy accept his love, even though he was so small? Sometimes he felt like his keyblade made up for something he lacked... (@_@ whoa... poor kid... )
Veni, veni, venias, (Gloriosa) Ne me mori facias (Generosa) Veni, veni, venias, (Gloriosa) Ne me mori facias (Generosa)
Sephiroth Sephiroth
"Now, you die."
Sora didn't even see the long blade coming until the last second when he quickly jumped, just barely avoiding having his twiggy legs cut off. As Sephiroth got closer to him, he smirked. The boy looked like a Cloud/Squall hybrid, how fascinating. Perhaps he was their offspring? Hah! Whatever the case, this puny boy would be no match for the great Sephiroth and his long sword... (*Bats away screaming fan girls, or guys ^.^* I'm talking about the Masamune, not his OTHER sword, ok people? ^__^)
"Well... I guess I have to fight you since I worked so hard to get here, but after the fight, we can become good 'friends,' right? (You mean yaoi lover, don't you?)
Sora looked around for the odd female voice that kept making such mean comments about him. "Listen authoress-lady-person, my preference for drop dead sexy bishounen clad in black leather is none of your damn business!" He shouted, blushing prettily. Sephiroth merely sighed, looking quite bored at the moment.
(Oh? Is it now? Well then, I guess I'll have to become more than an evil authoress and REALLY have some fun with you! I'll become an evil NARRATOR that makes you do things entirely against your will! Muahahahahahahaha!!!)
Swallowing a gulp of air, Sora's brows furrowed. Now what would happen?
(Suddenly, Sephiroth leapt onto Sora and glomped him... for starters... )
"H-Hey! I-I'm not ready to go all the way yet! Oh, Sephiroth! Sh-Shouldn't we get married before we do this?" Sora sighed in pleasure as the man kissed his neck gently.
'What the #%&* am I doing?! I can't stop myself!' Sephiroth thought in a panic. His hands were moving without his consent, and he was practically making out with the kid! If anyone ever found out about this, he'd be ruined! He tried desperately to gain control of his body, but the evil authoress/narrator would not let up. To his horror, he began to remove Sora's coat... then his shirt...
"I-I love you, Sephiroth, really, I do, but... I've never done this before, and..."
Sephiroth silenced Sora with a searing kiss, molding their lips together as his hands explored the boy's smooth, flawless chest. At that moment, Sora gave into the pleasure he was receiving from the angelic bishounen. After all, what was the likeliness that Sephiroth would return his feelings like this? Ok, so even if it was the authoress/narrator's doing, this wasn't so bad...
(Oh, it only gets better ^_~. At the moment the two were sharing that heated kiss, Riku was mysteriously teleported, from wherever the hell he was, to the arena, to witness, with wide, disbelieving eyes, the only person he ever desired, making out with the coolest villian ever created by his mother company Squaresoft. It was too cruel!)
"Sora... how could you?"
Hearing that familiar voice, Sora abruptly ended the kiss and turned to see Riku, looking deeply hurt, and really pissed.
Sephiroth slowly stood up. This new boy seemed strong... "I will not let you take my yaoi lover before I have fully claimed him!" On the inside, Sephiroth was cursing his misfortune. 'Why? Why?! How could I have said such a thing?! How could I have kissed that puny rodent?! AAAARRRRGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!'
(Calm down now Sephy, there is a medication called Prozac, which I'll give out to everyone when this fic is over... )
"Listen Sephiroth, I don't know what made you decide on Sora as your yaoi lover, but I'll tell you this, his ass is mine!" Riku shouted, pulling out his own weapon.
Sora blushed deeply. Did Riku really feel that way about him? Was he about to be involved in a love triangle? (*Gasp!*) "R-Riku... I... I didn't know you felt that way."
"Sora, from the moment we first met, I felt connected to you in a special way. To me, you will always be more than a friend, but now... why? Why are you doing this with a man you've probably just met? Don't I mean anything to you?"
"Riku, this is all just a big misunderstanding! It's the evil authoress/narrator that's making us do this, I swear!"
Sephiroth grinned, "So when you said you loved me... that was all a lie created by the authoress? I could've sworn that happened BEFORE she decided to control us. You truly are a fickle little boy."
Riku glared at Sephiroth, then at Sora. "Is this true?"
Sora fidgeted nervously with his feet, looking down at the ground. "Well... "
"Yes or no?" Riku demanded, startling Sora out of his thoughts.
"Yes. I admit it. I am in love with Sephiroth. I'm sorry Riku, but we were never meant to be." Sora picked up his keyblade, ready to fight if need be. Riku merely laughed, a sad laugh that shook his entire being. So, he was being rejected? He knew he had to do something about that, even if it meant hurting the one he loved. Sora couldn't have meant it, could he?
Then, leaping into the air, Riku prepared to attack Sephiroth. Sora wasn't prepared for what was about to happen next...
"Riku... you know, for a little boy such as yourself, you are really well- built... not to mention handsome, " Sephiroth said in a seductive voice. "Perhaps I'll take you as my yaoi lover instead of Sora."
(OOOHHH....now we have a real love triangle!)
Riku's heart nearly skipped a beat as the beautiful he/she looking creature smiled at him. What did he just say? He wanted him to be his yaoi lover? This was just too weird! "Sorry, but I can't love anything that looks female, so take this!" he shouted as he prepared to strike Sephiroth with his own keyblade.
Estuans interius ira vehementi Estuans interius ira vehementi
Sephiroth Sephiroth
Sora felt left out... and the music was starting to get on his nerves. 'How did everything wind up like this? And I was about to score! Damn it!'
Sors immanis Et inanis Sors immanis Et inanis
"Sing in English dammit! I can't understand Latin!" he pouted as he sat down and put his shirt and coat back on.
(Now, now Sora, too much stress is not good for you. Here, take this. It'll make you feel better ^_~ *A bottle of some pills magically appears in Sora's lap*)
Sora sighed in defeat and without a second thought, popped a pill. Hmmm, he was feeling a bit better... a bit different, too. Suddenly his body grew taller, muscles he never knew he had became more defined, and Loa and behold, he was an adult!
(See? Now Sephiroth will surely want you again! Maybe even Riku too! Go get 'em tiger!)
With renewed determination, Sora set out to stop the quarreling men and make his new self become known. "SEEEEEEPPPPPHHHHYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!! RRRRIIIIIIIIIKKKKKKKUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Look at meeee!" he yelled, jolting both guys out of their heated battle. Eyes opened wide at the sight of the new (and improved) Sora. Sephiroth dropped his sword, and Riku did likewise with his keyblade. Slowly, the two men walked up to Sora, blushes on their pretty faces.
"I'm in love."
"Me too."
Sora smiled. It was wonderful to be loved, but who would he choose? Both men looked promising, and he did know Riku longer than Sephiroth, but...
(How bout I make the decision for you? ^_~)
Before Sora could get out another word, both men glomped him. Well, if you can't have just one, take both!
And so, the tournament was canceled, and later on, the three men went to Traverse Town to declare their love to all. Unfortunately, many didn't want to attend the wedding... (Gee, I wonder why?) Cloud was in tears that his beloved Sephiroth was in love with another, and Kairi, well, being on an isolated island, had no clue anyway as to what was going on, so we'll just forget about her. And so, the three-some couple of bishounen lived happily ever after, shaming Disney by their un-straightness ^_^. Ah, isn't love wonderful?
~Owari~ The End
AN: That was scary. Well, If you've read this to the end, please do whatcha gotta do, and R+R!