Tom sits underneath an apple tree on a small hill watching the sunset with Jenny resting on his lap. He looks at her and she gazes back at the gaping void that is his eyes. Tom tightens his grip around Jenny ever so slightly and smiles back at her, then they return to watching the rest of the sunset.
Time slips by and soon they are about enter the twilight of the night just before dusk. Suddenly the reality screams in agony as a tear opens up and out comes a giant lemon followed by a horde of demons from the depths of hell.
"The Giant Lemon, I though I had slain you!" Tom exclaims.
"Ha, that indeed you did, however, the Giant Peach used the spoon power time machine to save me by replacing me with another giant lemon. Since you tired to kill me I shall take what's most precious to you that I will." The Giant Lemon replied.
The sound of thousand upon thousand guns being loaded and read to get fired echoes throughout the grass land.
Tom holds up his hands and says "Come on, don't do anything you'll regret."
"Fire!" The Giant Lemon shouts.
The demons fire off their weapons at Tom. The bullets stops in a few meters away from Tom and hangs suspended in the air for a brief moment before they turn around and flies back at those who shot them in the first place killing them instead.
Unfortunately, firing at Tom was just a distraction so they could snatch Jenny behind his back. Unfortunately for them that is, just as one was about to cup at feel at Jenny's bosom she uses her electrical blasts to fry the demons.
More demons continues to arrive from the tear. Jenny creates a storm cloud that blast of chains of lightning while Tom uses his telekineses to destroy them.
"Tom, there is no ending to them. We must seal the tear!" Jenny shouts.
"I can do it."
Tom and Jenny sees a person standing next to them.
"Who are you?" Tom asks the mysterious person.
"I'm you, from the present."
Tom and Jenny gasps.
"I will merge with you so you'll obtain the knowledge necessarily to close the tear." the other Tom grabs a hold of Tom and they merge instantaneously.
A massive boulder comes flying out from the nearby forest and smashes down onto a group of demons. With a swift hand movement Tom slices the Giant Lemon in two and uses the boulder to press out the lemon juice over the tear. Tom then lifts up a tree from it's foundation.
"Jennifer, hand me the the Spatial sandwich bandage." Tom shouts to her. "Not the ham sandwich, the peanut-butter jelly one."
She throws him the right sandwich with a bandage on it, Tom changes it's trajectory and gets the spatial sandwich to stick to the tree then hurls it like a projectile at the tear. A huge explosion erupts and once it has hit it's apex it reverts into an implosion and seals the tear.
"That's how you bandage the universe." Tom said but then he caught a glimpse of something and turns his attention to it. "Whoa, I found the chair again"
"Awesome chair. Let's have sex on it."
"YES!"
There on that very chair they had the most awesome sex ever. This truly was a tale of excellence.