*Knock knock knock* "Amy."
*Knock knock knock* "Amy."
*Knock knock knock* "Amy."
Sheldon bounced up and down on his toes as he waited impatiently for someone to answer apartment 314. He hadn't been here in oh so long and wasn't sure why he was here right now even, but the least someone could do was answer the door for a guest, even it was an unexpected arrival.
After a few moments, Sheldon repeated said knocks and shuffled even more in his spot. The luggage he had with him waited patiently at his side, as if it had no choice. The hallway air was cool, the scene around him comforting, and yet, he was still more nervous than he had ever been in a long time.
Why wasn't Amy answering her door? He knew she was here, her car was in the parking lot and he could see her lights on under the crack of her front door. She wasn't still mad at him, was she? They had only talked a total of three times over that summer, once a month. He hoped she wasn't still mad.
Letting out a sigh of irritation, Sheldon decided to call for her through the door, desperate to see her.
"Amy, could you get the door? I know you're here." Oddly enough, Sheldon heard a familiar groaning from inside as Amy yelled "It's…open," in a strange voice, followed by a fit of giggling.
Placing his hand on the doorknob, Sheldon began to wonder if this was the best idea. Sure she didn't sound angry, but she could be once she saw him. She was known for being overly emotional. Frustration or tears were inevitable.
Hesitantly, Sheldon opened the door a crack and peeked inside. Amy was sitting in the middle of her living room in a pair of shorts and a baggy t'shirt. Dear Lord it was the most skin he had seen on her in a long time. And was that a hat she was wearing…?
The minute Amy saw Sheldon, she sprang up from the floor where she was sitting criss cross and stormed her way over to her front door; flinging it open the rest of the way.
Sheldon recoiled when he saw the furious glare Amy was sending him, and his stomach fell simultaneously. She sounded so happy a moment ago, perhaps she didn't want to see him just yet…?
Or maybe she had just missed him too much. Maybe it was too much hurt for her to handle, too much to deal with. He didn't blame her, leaving like that without an explanation was pretty risky. Even so, that was no reason for her to take it this extreme, or dress in such a way. Was that a bottle of vodka in her hands? Good Lord.
"What do you want?" Amy snarled at him, her body tense and her lips contorted into the most wicked frown he had ever seen on her. He instantly cringed at her expression, and he thought he saw her face soften once he did this, but he couldn't be sure. Her eyes were blazing in fury and rage.
"Uhm…" Sheldon spat, swallowing and backing up slightly. He watched as Amy sighed and relaxed her shoulders. The scowl on her face instantly turned to a deeper frown than before and she turned her back to him, walking and sitting back down on the floor. Sheldon was conflicted, she hadn't invited him in, did he stand in the hallway, or come in…?
Before he could say anything else, he gasped quietly when he observed Amy raise the vodka bottle to her mouth and take a long swig. She began rambling after that, holding the bottle loosely in her grasp.
"Welcome to club depressed, running since three months ago." She told him with a sigh, her voice surprisingly steady considering how much she had already drunken. Sheldon stared at her wordlessly, his luggage in hand, and cleared his throat in an attempt to speak.
"Can I… may I, come in?" he couldn't bring himself to look her in the eyes after what she had just said. He didn't mean to cause her this much pain, he was just trying to save himself from becoming lost. It wasn't hard to deny the fact that he had neglected her over these past months, but he came here with the hope of reconciling, at least a little bit. Now he wasn't even sure she would talk to him beyond a simple hello.
"Depends, are you going to continue being a jack ass? If you are, don't take a step closer." She said confidently, taking another long gulp of straight vodka from the bottle. Just watching her made Sheldon's stomach churn, he hated seeing her in such a state.
Sighing, Sheldon rubbed the back of his neck and looked to the ground. "Has it really been this bad?" he asked quietly. Amy was silent, and he dared not move an inch, as if it would come back to haunt him if he did.
"Don't worry about it, Sheldon. I'm… I'm okay, just… come in, okay?" She was practically begging him from her spot on the floor, and when Sheldon looked up, she was craning her neck to look at him, her expression blank. He wondered if she was still mad at him, but decided to take up her offer and wheeled his luggage inside behind him and set it down.
Closing the door, he looked around for a place to sit, but when he glanced to Amy, she was patting the floor in front of her, indicating for him to sit across from her. Sheldon Cooper never sits on the floor, but she was drinking, so she probably wouldn't remember, would she? He sat down across from her anyways, it wouldn't matter in the long run, as long as he took a shower once he got home.
For a moment, the two sat on the floor, staring at each other in an uncomfortable silence, before Amy took a deep breath and began talking in the same clear voice, with added emotion to it that had Sheldon grasping on every word she said.
"Sheldon, do you know how much Hell I've been through… these past three months? God it was horrible… getting up… working… coming home…. Drinking and crying myself to sleep… those were my days, Sheldon! And did you… did you even, care? No, no you… didn't… but, but it's okay… vodka is…better… than… than any friend you could have… at least, that's what Penny says…"
It was absolutely impossible for Sheldon not to role his eyes at Amy's rambling. While he felt something towards her for putting her through this apparent pain, he couldn't help but feel disappointed in her some how. Sober Amy wouldn't be saying this nonsense…
"Amy, first of all, I don't think I could apologize enough for what I did to you, I honestly don't. Second, if we're going to talk, could you please put the alcohol away? I really need to talk to sober Amy right now, and it's not helping."
"Why?" Amy snapped, squinting her eyes at him and leaning in closer. "Why, so you can continue being a jerk to the Amy who actually cares?"
Hearing Amy say she didn't care at that moment shouldn't have surprised Sheldon, she was drinking after all, but still, her words stung. Silently, he reached over and placed a hand gently on her vodka bottle and pulled, intending on taking it away from her.
Surprisingly, her grip on it was stronger than he had expecting and she seemed to be putting up a fight on letting it go. So he tried again, this time with more force, but she still wasn't budging. That was when Sheldon decided to change his method on getting the bottle away from her, grasping her hand gently and staring deep into her eyes.
"Nice try, Dr. Cooper." Amy said with a smirk, hugging the bottle closer to her and causing Sheldon to drop her hand and lean away from her. The sudden coldness that covered her hand after was unbearable, her hand had been cold for far too long.
Bringing the bottle up to her lips, Amy paused before actually taking a sip. What was she doing? She had Sheldon sitting right in front of her; her hands didn't have to be cold.
On her own free will, Amy finally set the bottle aside. Sheldon visibly relaxed at this, and the tension in the air lifted ever so slightly.
"Are you going to sit there or are you actually going to offer me an explanation as to why you left without telling me?" Amy asked, a crack in her voice. Sheldon didn't speak for quite a bit, but when he did, it was almost as if he had already been thinking of what to say, the words flowed from his mouth so smoothly.
"I'm going to be honest with you, Amy, I thought if I told you, if I allowed myself to talk to you while I was gone, I would actually admit to you that I couldn't do it on my own. I didn't want to break down and tell you that… so I ran."
Amy listened on silently, nodding here and there and groaning internally when she thought about how she was going to feel in the morning. Everything seemed like an illusion right then, but Sheldon sitting in front of her was real. His explanation was real. Her urge to kiss him was real. Everything was as clear as daylight.
So she interrupted him, by leaning in and hugging him, of all things, instead of kissing him. She felt that if she pressed her lips to his, he would cringe at the taste of alcohol against them. And to her discomfort, that's when the tears started falling, right in the middle of that awkward hug on the floor, drunk and confused as ever.
"I'm sorry…" Sheldon whispered over her shoulder, wrapping his arms around her briefly before pushing her away and getting up off the floor. Though Amy was disappointed, Sheldon offered his hand to her and helped her up off the floor as well.
"Lets get you to bed and we can talk more in the morning." He said softly, intending on guiding her to her room. She leaned into him immediately as she began to feel the alcohol in her system taking over.
"You… you want to spend the night here?" She kind of just assumed, and prayed to whatever deity out there that he would say yes. God she hoped he said yes. She rooted for those words to come off his lips so much it almost made her sick.
"Of course I do," Sheldon said simply, a sad smile on his face. "I've missed my girl too much to go home alone."