John Doe – The unanswered questions of my life - or who am I?
Epilog
Slowly the last rays of sun disappear. The first fog is rising from the grass in front of the house. A man is sitting on the veranda and reads a book. Now the upcoming darkness forces him to close it. He takes off his glasses. His clothes are not the right size and look very old. First gray streaks enforce his hair. The thick black beard hides his adolescent face, in fact almost completely. At the first glance you might think he is nothing but an old, ugly and lonely man. Only his eyes, unfathomable and shimmering like the Caribbean Sea, can guess the smart young man he is.
He loves when autumn sends his first signs across the country. Somehow this season fits to his feelings best.
With all his thoughts he is far away in history. "Six years! That's all I have" he is thinking " Happy Birthday John ".
Six years now, without knowing anything about his past. When he woke up in hospital 6 years ago, no one could tell him who he was before they brought him to the hospital. He touches the scars on his body. The doctor told him that he was found with severe burns to the chest at the entrance of the hospital. Unfortunately they found a brain tumor too and he needed surgery in order to live. The doctor noticed he had one done before, because during the surgery they found another scars. That's all he knows about himself. After one year searching for a sign that would help him to remember, he decided to leave LA. He felt like a stranger there. One of the new friends, he found while searching for his past gave him this small cabin in the wood to live in.
He shivers a bit. "Time to go inside " he is thinking. The Sun just disappears behind the mountains on the other site of the lake. Only the red and orange shimmering clouds are left on the beautiful sunny day it was today. The usually blue- green friendly looking lake is now lying there black and menacing, perfectly matching to the feelings he is in at the moment. He takes a deep breath. The silence of the untouched nature around is floating into him. He tries to keep this feeling just for a moment. He tries to put all the desperation out of his mind. Sure he learned to deal with his situation over the years, but one question is never gone and when he goes back into the house, seeing his face at the glass of the window it is black. He stands there, not able to move. Fixing the face he can see there and yell in his mind.
" Who am I ???"
Chapter 1Naked, like nature made him, John steps out of the lake. It is early morning. Dewdrops are all around on the grass and the trees. First sunlight let them shimmering like little pearls. The lake looks like steaming with the clouds of fog allover it. It is cold this morning. John's shivering a bit. His body is well shaped, only the scars on his breast telling about the pain he was into, not long time ago. One of them looks like a dark red heart. It's positioned directly on the place where his broken heart beating inside. So it looks like he put his heart outside. John is used to go for swimming every morning, as long as lake isn't covered with ice. The endless silence around him in the open water, seems to take all the tortures from the nightmares he had all night away from him. He takes his towel and drys his body a bit. Than he wraps it around his hips and goes back to the house.
Coffeemaker has already done his work and a delicious smell of fresh coffee welcomes him. Fast he steps into the small bathroom and finish to dry his body. He put on shorts and a dark green shirt. John looks like someone on vacation now. When he look into the mirror he strokes his beard, " I need to shave I guess " he says to himself.
Then he goes back into the only room this house has. The bed into the corner looks messy. The pillows are lying beside of it. The sheet isn't on the right place either. Looking at this reminds him on the nightmare tortured him last night and made him awake this early in the morning. He was used to have those dreams over the years, but last night it was so real. The face of the woman always asking him for help in his dream, was clear like never before. She pointed her hands in his direction. Tears were in her eyes and he can still hear her saying.
" Please don't leave me. I love you so much. Please Michael come back.
" MICHAEL !!!! " His until this moment sad and lonely looking eyes seems to change into the brightest ones on earth.
" Yes, Michael !" he says very loud ," She called me Michael. I am Michael ! I have a name ! "
He runs in direction to his PC, the only window to the real world he has . He is as nervous as a single person can be. He almost falls over his yesterday carelessly on the floor thrown clothes. I need to clean this up, he is thinking while avoiding to hit the ground at the last moment. The chair in front of the small desk is like fixed at the bottom, when he moves too fast tries pull him backwards. Finally he makes it; To sit down and type in the web –address. It seems to him like it takes hours before the search for people site open, he is used to search for signs about his past.
"Micael ", "mihel", "mchael". He hits the table with his fist . " Calm down " he says to him self. " Just concentrate ". Very slowly now he types in:
"Michael – Missing -Explosion . "
He hesitates for few seconds before hitting " ENTER". His eyes are closed. When he finally do it.
"Don't be to excited, there will be nothing. Lower your hopes." he says in his mind. Almost 5 minutes was passed, he is just sitting in front of the screen and doesn't have the courage to look at it. He isn't sure if he can deal with another disappointment, another no search results message.
" OK ! It will change nothing if the list is empty !" he says loud and serious. He lows his head a bit. Slowly, very slowly he opens his eyes. His long, thick eyelashes passing his eyes like a curtain that slowly opens. He still looks down at the bottom. Still afraid there will be nothing again. He needs to tell himself to focus. Finally he lifts his head and there are a long list of results. Nervously he starts to check them.
"Michael X died in an car-accident, when the car exploded …
"Firefighter Michael Y is missing in action after the big explosion of Fuel tanks in Florida…"
"Michael J suffered heavy injuries when he tries to avoid …. "
and so on …
Nothing of this yet ring the bell. He is close to give it up.
" No matter" he tells himself " At least I have a name now!"
"Please MICHAEL come back!" he hears the woman saying again. Her face always makes him feel like home, no matter how bad the dreams he had were. He knows he loved her and she had to love him too.
" Some day I'll find you! I promise! " He says to the picture that is stored in his mind forever.
The smell of the fresh coffee reminds him that he was on his way to have breakfast. So he decides to close the site for now. He clicks the " x ". All he needs to do is lift his finger from the mouse-button and the darkness of his lost memories will be shown on a black screen too. His eyes gliding for a last sight down the list and there it is …..
Miami Herold" Michael Scofield , famous for saving his brother's life by breaking him out of Fox river state penitentiary, didn't survive his Final Break! "
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