I don't really watch television, but Lili Reinhart and Cole Sprouse are too beautiful to not watch.
Jughead was angry he couldn't blame anyone.
Well, in theory, he could. He could blame his dad for essentially ruining his life and the life of his entire family. He could try to blame Tall Boy for offering him the jacket in the first place, but one branch eventually stems back to the whole tree. In which case would be Jughead, a lone birch in a familiar field of aspen. He made the decision to join the Serpents, something he doesn't regret, but knows will cost him a lot more than he can provide down the road. He also made the decision to take a shady route to help his dad get out of jail. Apparently, his heart only knew of desperate intentions that asked for a price of said heart.
In the end, the joining of a gang on the path to consume all of him and the paranoia of separation from all he ever knew saw Jughead trade his own heart, which nursed dreams and aspirations with a certain blonde haired girl, for the safety of his father.
He remembered the look of distress he caused Betty by their split, but it was the result of a desperate intention he did to mean well. If he could protect her by separating from her, then he would do it. He if had to intentionally break her heart so she would remain pure and perfect in the dark world he was dealing with, he would do it. Hell, if he had to sacrifice his last bits of decency so she could retain hers, he would do it.
And did it he did. Jughead was confident their separation and split was something they needed, something they could eventually look over when the time was right and fix, because that's who they were.
They were Betty and Jughead; they always fell back together.
But the sight of the pretty pink package had him thinking otherwise. The edges were crisp and the folds sharp; obvious signs of several hours of consumed time and thought out planning. A clean white bow, made from actual ribbon and executed masterfully into a beautiful loop sat prettily at the top, practically gleamed at him.
Did he say gleamed? He meant glared.
For a second, the rational part of his brain told him it was a gift from Betty to someone of her choosing, but the irrational part, the bit that was getting larger, stronger, and starting to sound a lot more rational than irrational, noted the carefulness of the wrapping. Of course pure and perfect Betty could wrap something like this for anyone, but the idea didn't really fit. This was perfectly wrapped with affection.
Affection no longer directed at him, and the thought alone crushed him.
He knew he shouldn't be snooping in her office. At one point, when everything was okay and stable, the room also belonged to him- to them, but his desperation to see Betty was getting the best of him. Catching sight of a small tag, he picked it over and looked over the familiar scrawl:
To Betts,
the best girl I know
Of course, the rational part tried to sooth the rumbling of his stomach with the probable cause that it was from Veronica, the only other female with as much strive for intended perfection as Betty herself. It would make logical sense too, if the care in wrapping had anything to show by. But the irrationally rational part suggested it was from someone other than Veronica who knew Betty's fondness for elegantly wrapped presents. Someone who's writing had been on several of Jughead's notes for his manuscript. Someone else who knew Betty to be the best possible girl they knew.
Like a forgotten bruise, he recalled his last meeting with Archie at Pop's, where he learned Archie was no longer with Veronica, and as a way to comfort his best friend, Jughead also revealed he had ended things with Betty. He'd done it as a way of leveling the ground, to let Archie know he wasn't alone, he was going through the exact same ordeal, and Jughead would be available if he ever needed to talk. Looking back at it now, maybe it would have been better if he hadn't of mentioned anything at all.
For some reason, the thought of Archie being the one to support Betty with everything Jughead wished he could do but couldn't struck him in the heart. If he remembered correctly, their conjoined presence during the search for Jason Blossom's killer was the catalyst for their relationship in the first place. What started off as working together for the Blue and Gold eventually shifted to Jughead placing a kiss on her lips for the very first time.
Would the hunt for the Black Hood set the stage for a relationship that never had the chance to happen in the first place?
Jughead frowned at the pink box again. He wasn't an idiot, it was second nature for him to read people, it's what made him such a successful writer. He saw the look the two shared when Archie had given Betty that stupid record, her bashful smile and shy giggle. The proud look Archie wore at her gushing over the thoughtfulness of his gift was just as strong as the look of indifference he tried to put on, but it was obvious to anyone who had a functioning pair of eyes and a tendency to overthink to notice his happiness at her reaction. If the tensing of Veronica's shoulders was anything to go by, she noticed it too.
Of course, he would want the two people he cared for more than anything to be happy, but for them two to be happy... together? It… bothered him. To picture Betty in a position Veronica once held a few days ago, arms wrapped around Archie, face bright with young love, Archie gazing up at her with the same look of affection Jughead was making fun of just a few weeks ago… To picture Archie in his spot in Pop's booth by Betty's side, with his heavy arm draped across her shoulders, drawing shapeless figures on her bare arm, his usually gloom mind given a moments change with certain thoughts guaranteed to make Betty blush.
To picture them kissing? The thought alone sunk his stomach, crushed his heart, and made him sick.
Sick with what? Maybe anger, jealousy, regret. Emotions he wasn't used to feeling now seemed common placed. For some reason, the very thought of the girl who managed to engrave herself into his previously non-existent heart sharing heartfelt moments only experienced between them two, the silent looks of 'I-love-you's' said between them, heated kisses laced with potential for more, with another boy? And not just any other boy, but Archie Andrews?
It's the same reason why Betty's breaking up with him via Archie had hurt so damn much. Since they were children, Jughead had to live with being second best for everything, from being the second best child to the second best friend to both his best friends. With Betty, his feeling of being second best was replaced with the amazing discovery of finding his own equal in Betty Cooper, so his subconscious fear of Archie suddenly pulling his head out of his ass one day and realizing that Betty was the literal definition of the perfect girl-next-door, his perfect match as well, grew every day they were apart.
The sick feeling in his stomach bothered him to the point where he was offended. Offended by both of them for even thinking their being together wouldn't bother him, wouldn't insult him, wouldn't hurt him.
But this is why Jughead was angry in the first place, because he couldn't blame anyone but himself for the entire situation.
At hearing the door open, he dropped the tag, his thoughts and insecurities, and turned, eyes softening at Betty's noticeable hesitation. "Hey."
Under normal circumstances, he wouldn't have been so bothered at her reluctance. He doesn't even think he'd of noticed it were they together. But they weren't together, and for some reason, Jughead Jones had suddenly become hyper-aware and somewhat paranoid of anything and everything 'Betty Cooper'.
Standing in front of her, here in her office, he already looked like a fool for being here in the first place considering how he left her the last time he saw her, so clearing his throat before he made an absolute fool of himself, he approached her slowly and began his weak explanation. "I stayed behind because…" but even after a second, he wavered. Why did he stay behind? He could have given her his gift in front of everyone, even if it wasn't apart of Kevin's stupid Secret Santa, because then it would have made things less (or maybe more?) awkward between them; it would have completely evaporated any yearning to be by her side and see her beautiful smile directed at no one but him. To be honest, he thinks he made it worse by being alone with her. "Merry Christmas."
He could almost feel the tiny gift behind him mocking him as he presented her his own present. A quick once over and he automatically wanted to take it back and run out the room. Wrapped haphazardly with more tape than actual paper, some areas bunched up together to cover spots he didn't know how to fold, it was a hideous sight compared to the one Archie had given her. To top it all off, he had put nothing to top this all off the way his best friend had his own gift. Maybe there wasn't, but Jughead, being the hawk-eyed writer he was, saw the symbolism instantly. Maybe she didn't, but Betty, being the observant detective she was, probably saw it too.
"Thank you." Betty's reluctance was not only obvious in the way she spoke, but in the way she gently took the gift from his hands, making sure not to touch him. Had he of been selfish and not broken things off, he would of imagined her smile and laugh, everything beautiful. He'd hug her and maybe kiss her in a rare but meaningful act of affection. He'd think of ways to continue to make her happy for the day, month, and even forever. He wouldn't be so wound up over the pink package from a particular red haired boy with a lot of shared heavy history with Betty.
Instead of dancing around an issue that would no doubt bother him for the entire time he spent away from her, he jerked his head to the gift and leaned against her desk to allow her view of it. "Cute present," he said, the uneasy feeling in his stomach returning, "who's it for?" It was funny he said it in the context of her giving the gift for someone, as opposed to someone giving the gift to her. He knew the answer already so he didn't know why he asked in the first place. It wasn't from her, and even if it was, it wasn't for him.
The softening of her face and small smile was too sickening for him to look at, so he crossed his arms across his chest, brought a hand to play with a single strand of hair in his line of sight, and looked at the door from which she entered. "It's from Arch," she said gently, "he dropped it off this morning, but I haven't had the chance to open it." Instead of making a motion to grab and open it, Betty turned to look at him, mimicking his position of locked arms, and with an arched brow, waited.
Despite being the color of freezing ice water, her eyes were fire. He did a quick search for that small bit of bravery he had a few moments ago and, with a shaky breath, started. "Look, I'm sorry, for how it all went down between us." He sighed. "The Serpents, my dad and I specifically, are in a precarious place. I…", despite her scowl and his depleting amount of adrenaline, he pressed forward, "I just don't want you in those crosshairs." It might of been difficult for her to see it then, but he knew Betty to be an extremely bright girl; she would eventually see them being together right now wasn't the greatest of ideas.
"Well that's not your decision to make, Jughead," she bit, the annoyed tone in her voice was directed at no one but him and it made his stomach sink, "even if you think it's to protect me, it's my choice, what I risk and for whom."
A weak, "I know", was all he could offer because that's all he knew. He knew she was willing to do everything in her power to not sever the tie he had broken so easily, but he couldn't allow her to do that for him. He knew how much he meant to her and how devoted she was to him, but he had treated her devotion as if it was a joke, as if she was in the wrong for loving him the way he knew he loved her. "I should go. I need to check on my dad."
Embarrassed is what he was. How could he have thought he could make things up? What was he doing here in the first place? He had told her they needed to remain separate until things were once again stable, but how can they become stable if all he was doing was making motions as if to re-establish his severed connection to her? If this was the case, why weren't they together? His gift to her was thoughtful and he had gotten it before the abrupt break up, so he didn't want to let it go to waste. Besides, what use did he have for a signed first edition of his beloved's favorite author other than to act as a constant reminder that he was no longer with her?
He was about to leave her office, head hung in shame and tail tucked in-between his legs, when he heard her sigh before she called him back.
Underneath her desk she brought out a large box, green and wrapped with a startling silver bow on top. Even with the reminder of Archie's pink gift, he couldn't stop his lopsided grin. She graced him with her own smile in return before he left.
Maybe their separation and split was something they needed, something they could eventually look over when the time was right and fix, because that's who they were.
They were Betty and Jughead; they always fell back together.
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