Sentimental
Kari never understood entirely. Jessa found that to be quite endearing. He was always quietly confused about some customs and behaviours. His greatest confusion lay with love. He didn't understand how there could be so many different meanings to one entity. He loved Brochael. He would always love Brochael; that much was obvious to everyone.
He would never quite understand how to react though, when others were in love. The love between Jessa and her cousin Thorkil confused him. The two were often at odds with one another. They could bicker for longer than anyone else – and they often did; over even the most trivial of matters. Jessa sometimes caught Kari staring at them as she argued with her cousin. He once thought that they hated one another and they had tried to convince him otherwise but fell into another argument.
Kari watched little children playing on his visits. Sometimes there would be two tiny children. They weren't old enough to understand but they kissed each other's cheeks affectionately. They showed the love between friends that minds didn't have to understand for the heart to be wise in. Kari had a tentative understanding of that after a few conversations but when Wulfgar and Signi did the same he became awfully confused. He still couldn't understand entirely.
His innocence was extended beyond that of a child. A child understands the love that their parent's share. A child loves their friends without question. If there are siblings a child understands the love between them. A child understands the love of a family; between cousins and second cousins and aunts and uncles. A child understands all of that and more. It's only due to age that a child is underestimated.
Unfortunately, they overestimated Kari. His understanding of love was incomplete. He didn't know what was real and what was not. He saw marriages that fell apart. He heard the women gossip about infidelity. He couldn't see the positive for the cloud of confusion that hung over him.
For a long time, Jessa was charmed by his confusion. His innocence was sweet and endearing. However, the day eventually came when she had grown distant from those sentiments. She sighed quietly whenever he frowned in confusion. She tried to keep her expression neutral when he asked questions.
No one else had grown weary of his questions. No one else was bored with his naïveté. Kari wasn't a fool. He saw through her disguise. It hurt his feelings that she was growing infuriated with him. In his mind all friends accepted all flaws without question. Jessa had made it blatantly clear that she would not.
He knew better than to do it. He had tried to ask her. She would always brush off his questions before he could complete them. He didn't like to watch her walk away from him. That was why he confronted her that night. The two of them were alone in the guest room that she had been assigned.
"I want answers," he told her.
"I've tried explaining this to you before. There are no other ways for me to make it clear. I don't think you'll suddenly understand if I try again," she reasoned.
"You've grown tired of me," he frowned but was equally as adamant.
"I haven't. I-" she suddenly couldn't speak.
Her eyes widened in horror. She knew exactly what he had done. She glared at him but remained in place. He could immobilise her if he wanted to. Perhaps he already had.
"I want to be your friend," he explained. "I'm sorry for doing this, Jessa. I have to know why you're being like this. Have I done something wrong? I want to hear your explanation. I promise that I won't go into your mind."
She struggled for a moment. The words were on her tongue and they wanted out. Whether it was by his doing or not she didn't know but she had to tell the truth. She wanted to tell him for quite some time but hadn't the nerve to do so.
"I was always overly sentimental…" she said when he released the chill on her throat.
"I don't understand," he tried to meet her gaze but she couldn't look at him.
"You never did understand. I can't make you understand. I've tried all of these years but you're no closer to understanding than before," she sighed. "Kari, it's late. I'm tired. Please let me go to sleep now."
"Of course, sleep well," he retreated slowly. "I'm sorry about this, Jessa. I had to know. I won't do this again."
She looked at the door moments before it closed. Her throat ached with the need to call him back but she didn't. The moment he left they both knew that he was still no closer to understanding than he was before their meeting.
Author's Note: Aw. Yes, I feel like a sentimental sap. I'm slightly upset by this but at the same time I'm utterly content. This is the first time that I've done one of these and truly enjoyed doing so in a long time. Thank you, Snow-Walker Trilogy for this enjoyment. I also want to thank all of you, dearest readers, for reading my work. I hope with all of my heart that you enjoyed my story. I apologise if you were not satisfied, just as I apologise for the fate of Fuyu no Tenshi as I still haven't found my book.
Part of the Revival Collection.