Just a quick one-shot that came to me at three am. The movie played out in my mind, but I'm not sure it translated well. Basically, Pen is nursing a shattered heart due to a devastating loss. As she tries to make sense of everything, Hotch shows up with something that might help her move on. I hope you like it.
I don't own Criminal Minds.
Song prompt: "Rhythm of The Rain" by Dan Fogelberg
Rhythm of The Rain
"Damn you Derek Morgan!" Penelope Garcia muttered under her breath as she sat on the park bench. Reaching into the bag of pop corn, she threw it down on the ground and watched the pigeons fight for the pieces. "I hate you!" She threw more pieces, watching with half interest where they landed.
The park was the last place she had wanted to be, but after leaving work early, she found her apartment too small. Going for a walk, she found herself in the park, sitting on a bench, feeding mite infested rats with wings and wondering how she could have fallen for someone like Derek Morgan.
She had done some stupid, asinine things in her life…God knew some of which were in her permanent FBI file, but falling for the player of the century - last and the current - and then giving him her heart had to be the stupidest thing ever! She should have known where he looked at her with those big brown eyes and killer white smile that he was lying when he said, "You can trust me, Baby Girl; I will never hurt you."
Liar! Her mind screamed. She should have shot him when she had the chance - or rather chances. Pfft, good chance doing that one since you don't believe in guns, Penelope, her conscience chided.
"After what he did, I believe in them with all of my heart," she replied, but her voice lacked teasing. Honestly, she didn't believe in much of anything anymore. Derek was gone, her heart was broken, and she didn't even get the chance to tell him good-bye. Staring off into space, she kept tossing the kernels.
Soft footsteps walked up behind her. Not bothering to turn around, she concentrated on her task.
"I thought I might find you here," spoke the familiar voice of Aaron Hotchner. Pen ignored him. "May I sit down?" He waited for an answer, then sat down beside the tech analyst.
Hotch watched her for a moment, then the birds. For a long time no one spoke. In the distance, thunder rumbled.
"If you sit out here when the storm arrives, you might get hit with lightning," Hotch observed.
"I've been shot; I don't think lightning can hurt much worse," Pen quipped.
"I haven't experienced either one, but I'm sure neither is a pleasant experience." Hotch turned to look at the blonde woman in her polka dotted dress. "I put in paperwork to give you the rest of the week off. I didn't think you needed that stress right now."
"I was going to be in tomorrow," Pen argued.
"No you won't," Hotch contradicted. "You need to get yourself right and work thru what happened before you try and tackle crime." He reached out and patted her hand. "That's what Morgan would have wanted you to do."
Pen's mouth twitched. "Why should I care what Derek Morgan thinks?"
"Because he loved you, and you still love him."
A single tear slipped from her eye to trail down her cheek to drop from her chin. "No, I don't," she whispered, but her voice quivered.
"Yes you do, but it's going to take time to realize that; trust me, I know."
"At least you had Jack to help you; I have no one. Just memories, and the last memory I have of him is him stealing my box of chocolates JJ gave me and me telling him that if he didn't give them back, I was going to wipe him off the face of the earth." Her tears fell faster.
"I know," Hotch replied. Pen looked at him sharply. "He told me. On the drive over to question the witness, he was really quiet, so I..."
"You profiled him," Pen finished.
"I asked him what was wrong," he corrected. "He told me what he did and what you said. He felt bad and promised to make it up to you. I told him that if he didn't, I would make sure he did." Hotch became quiet as he let her digest his words. "You didn't cause what happened," he comforted.
"But I said -" she started to argue.
"I said the same thing," Hotch interrupted. "Neither of us could have known that we were going to be ambushed when we got to the witness's house. We were out gunned and out manned."
"Why did he have to be hero?" Pen wailed. "Why didn't he run?"
"Because he isn't a runner," Hotch reminded her. "But he did save that child's life."
"I wish he was here so I could kick him."
"Me too. But if it would make you feel any better, you can kick me instead," he offered.
Pen considered the request carefully but let it go. "Thanks for trying to make me feel good, Boss, but that wouldn't help." She threw more popcorn as the thunder rumbled louder. The soft breeze blew a little harder and the few people in the park decided to leave. Even the birds took flight.
"What's wrong?" Hotch asked.
"He missed my birthday. I know…it wasn't his fault, but it still hurts. He never missed it in seven years - even when I was with Kevin, he never missed getting me something. Now I have no Kevin, no Derek, and no birthday."
"It hurts when your birthday falls on a holiday," Hotch comforted. "My and Haley's anniversary is Flag Day. Every June fourteenth when the nation is celebrating the birth of the stars and stripes…I can't ignore or avoid it. If it was any other ordinary day, I could pretend that it just came and went."
"I know."
Hotch reached into his suit pocket and pulled out a small box. "I debated whether or not to tell you this, but I was going thru Derek's desk to clean it out, when I came across something I think belongs to you." He handed the black velvet box over.
Pen slowly opened the box and drew in her breath. "Oh…" Her tears fell faster, but there was a smile on her face. Small, faint, but it was there. The first Hotch had seen in a couple of weeks.
"What is it?" Hotch asked quietly.
"Opal earrings. Beautiful opal earrings."
"But your birthday is in February."
"I know, but I love opals. They are unique, pure, and so rare," Pen whispered as she touched the large stones with her finger.
"Just like you."
A few rain drops fell, only to be followed by a few more. Hotch opened the umbrella and held it over Pen's head. Then the clouds opened up and the down pour came.
"He loved me."
"Yes he did. If he was here, I would kick him. Because there is nothing I wouldn't do to make you smile again," Hotch answered honestly. "I think we should get inside before we catch pneumonia."
"I can't." Closing the box, she held it tight. "I like the rain. Derek liked the rain too. In fact, he loved it. He loved dancing in it and just being himself. I can't count how many times he would grab my hands and spin me around. He didn't care who watched or how foolish he looked. I'd give anything to have one more dance in the rain."
Hotch watched the broken hearted analyst's face. He knew his team cared for one another, but he would never have guessed how deep those feelings went. Or maybe he had. But right now, he needed to find a way to make Garcia smile again. Even if it was just for a minute.
Throwing the umbrella down, Hotch stood up and reached for Pen's hand.
"What are you doing?" she asked in surprise as the rain drenched the ever stoic Aaron Hotchner.
"Dance with me."
She blinked once, twice, three times. "What?"
"Dance with me - in the rain." Taking her hand, he pulled her up, then twirled her around.
"There's no music," she observed.
"Did Derek need music?"
Pen shook her head. "No. He said he went by the rhythm of the rain."
Hotch's eyes twinkled. "Follow my lead." He laid her head on his shoulder and started to sway.
Pen pulled back and looked at him. "Thank you, Boss." She smiled at him - a genuine, true smile - the first he had seen in over two weeks. She laid her head back down.
Hotch felt his heart squeeze with both pain and joy. She was going to make it. "You're welcome, Penelope."