.
I am holding vigil at Asami's bedside. It's about four in the morning so almost everyone is asleep. It's just me and a man who is outside watching the front of this place, hidden behind tinted windows in a parked car. The room is dark except for the harsh spotlight of a reading lamp that is beside the chair where I am sitting.
Asami sleeps.
He was wounded from being shot by a gun. He'll recover.
My confidence in this is not 100%. It should be, but so many things could go wrong. An unknown blood clot could make its way to his lungs or his heart or his brain.
No. I can't let myself think of things like that. He'll recover. I'm sure of it.
An infection could overwhelm him. This is presently a real threat. It was caught early, but what if...
Stop it. Think of something else. ANYTHING else.
He's sedated. Heavily.
I am so sorry for this. There is a single-purpose in his mind right now. He would kill himself trying to get Takaba back, so the drugs were given to prevent him from attempting to do this until he can heal.
Until his sanity returns and he is capable of dealing with this rationally.
I'm not saying he's insane right now. That's not what I meant at all. Just determined, in an instinctual sort of way. I can't allow that. It's my duty to keep him safe.
He'll recover. He's strong. So strong, he managed to fight off the normal dosage of sedation, which is why he's so heavily drugged now.
Please forgive me.
Even at this level he tries to fight it. I see him struggling. It also doesn't take away his dreams. I know of what he dreams. In his dreams he speaks the name that at this moment is the center of his universe... Akihito.
Takaba has been a game changer. He went from being a whim to someone of profound importance, almost overnight. It was amusing to watch. He's a pain in the ass, but he's also responsible for lighting a fire in Asami. It's been a most welcome change.
He's also responsible for saving Asami, my precious superior, who was working himself into an early grave. He's now healthier more than ever, thanks to Takaba. He's eating regular meals, his behavior has been less risky, his stress levels have become non-existent...
Until now.
There are rapid movements beneath his eyelids. I hear soft moans. It has to be a nightmare. To see him in this state is heartbreaking for me. This level of stress is very bad for someone who needs to heal.
He's kicked the sheet off. The hospital garment he is wearing is pulled up around his waist, leaving him exposed.
This will not do.
I was going to cover him up, but then I notice he's sweating. This is a good sign. It means the fever will soon break. I probably should wait until he shows signs of cooling down first. I wouldn't want him to overheat.
It doesn't make me uncomfortable to see him this way. I've seen him undressed before. He's not shy about his body and I don't have those types of desires.
Whatever he is dreaming has now become turbulent. What should I do? Do I try to wake him? He's so heavily sedated it shouldn't be possible, but neither should it be possible for him to be dreaming.
I look where he is exposed. It occurs to me if Takaba were here, he could bring him out of this nightmare. He'd take away all his stress. The tool that they like to use for this is sex.
I'm not blind to that. They're discreet enough, but you can tell when it's about to happen by the way they look at each other. It's a glance that passes between them, predator and willing prey. I know this because I see it enough.
Another moan escapes his lips. It must be bad.
I take a deep breath and then stand up and walk over to him.
Just for tonight... let me be Takaba for you.
.
I was working on the scene in Controlled Chaos where Asami is being cared for after having been severely wounded by Fei Long, when this odd idea struck me. It continued to stick in my head, so I wrote it out. Not sure if most will be repelled by it but I was in a devilish state of mind.