My heart breaks a little more as I sit here dreaming of what it would be like if I had chosen you.
Would we be free from pain?
Would we be able to give into the music of the night?
Let the flames at last consume us?
I should push the thoughts from my mind as I look to the figure lying beside me.
I should slap myself for letting my mind wander to a lonely figure so far away.
I should, but yet I do not.
I realize only too late that my heart truly belongs to another.
My heart will never belong to the man beside me, but to the man who lives forever in darkness.
A man who taught me and lead me when no one was there
A man whom I have now abandoned to his solitude
Will I ever forgive myself?
No I shall never, for my abandonment of him is worse than death itself.
Now I must live my life knowing I belong to another in my heart.
No I shall never forgive myself
I deserve the worst of fates for my piteous thoughts
I wonder if he is still below the Opera
Do I dare try to find him?
No, I shall never try to find him.
I will live the rest of my life knowing I love him and let that be enough.
But it will never be enough.
I realize only too late that my heart truly belongs to Erik.