Title: Slipping into Routine
Summary: Frankly, it sucks to be human.
Disclaimer: Don't own.
Notes/Warnings: Unbetaed. Language.
If anything is out-of-whack, I'll just say this is AU.
Not to mention alcohol and insomnia does strange things to people...
Slipping into Routine
Edward sighs when he hears the all-too familiar racket coming from upstairs. Not again.
The door opens, and he sees the remains of a lamp on the floor and the leg of a broken chair in Envy's hands. He shouts Envy's name.
"Fuck off, pipsqueak!" Envy snarls and throws the leg at him. To the boy's disappointment, Edward catches it and sets it down.
"You're a bigger brat than Wrath," Edward comments amiably, noticing the way Envy's shoulders tense at the name. The thought of that whining idiot enrages him more.
"This is your fault," Envy snaps, abruptly pushing the blonde against a bookshelf. "If you weren't so hasty in closing the Gate, I wouldn't be stuck here with you."
Edward slowly pries his grip from his collar, and Envy hates how little effort it takes.
"I thought you were dead!" Edward fires back, shoving Envy away, causing the him to stumble over his feet and onto the bed.
"I'm a homunculus, moron. In case all this 'science' addled your brain, homunculi don't die from a few stab wounds."
Edward's condescending laugh makes him glower. "How long are you going to keep this up?"
Envy shrugs. "Forever since I have no idea what you're talking about."
"This!" Edward sweeps his mechanical arm at the mess Envy made.
"What about it?" Envy replies innocently, glancing at the room coolly.
"You can't throw a fit every time you're reminded that you're not a homunculus anymore. Accept it. You're human," Edward says almost maliciously, and the look on his face is even uglier.
"I am not!" Envy snarls, nearly shrieking the last word as he leaps off the bed at the smug blonde. Edward ducks at the last second and rams his elbow into Envy's bare stomach. He hears a groan above him and stands back up, smirking.
"You can feel pain now, can't you?" Edward states more than asks, already knowing the answer when he looks at the resentment on Envy's face. "You can't shift. You can't even beat me anymore." He hears Envy's sharp intake of breath.
"I'm just going easy on you, pipsqueak," Envy mutters, but the confidence is gone from his voice. Edward raises an eyebrow, daring Envy to just try and prove his words. Envy is the first to look down at his feet, which are still stubbornly covered in black material. He remembers how reliable they once were, never letting him land on anything but them.
It hurts to know that the alchemist is right. His perfect balance is gone. Any strength he had—as he discovered—was a result of the stones he had consumed, not from working out. Now he's just thin, but lately he's been able to grab onto something suspiciously like fat in certain spots. He hates it, not having control over his body anymore. He's so ugly now.
"You're wrong," he whispers viciously, sliding an arm over his stomach. "The Gate didn't make me a human. I'm still a homunculus, just like how you're still a damn alchemist. It just doesn't work here in this stupid world."
"You sure about that?" Envy wants to smash his fist into the careless look Edward gives him, but doesn't because he knows the boy is now faster than him and could easily break his wrist. "The Gate works in strange ways."
"It likes to fuck things up, I can tell you that," Envy retorts. "I didn't want to shift into a dragon. How the fuck was I suppose to find the bastard that way? But that was the cost of getting to the other side."
"You still killed him," Edward says softly. Envy scoffs, "I was more or less comatose when that happened."
"The Gate does everything for a reason. It could have given you your soul back."
Envy laughs humorlessly. "Equivalent exchange, dumbass. If I had gotten my soul back, you'd have to attach it to a pile of junk, just like what you did to your little brother. The Gate can't take anything except my body. I have nothing else."
"The Gate took my—how do you put it—experiences for the life of Al," Edward confesses. "It's not always cruel."
"Bullshit! The Gate gave birth to me, spat me out knowing the bastard wouldn't want me anymore. Then it puts me here with the people I hate the most!"
Edward can feel the rage boiling under Envy's skin.
"I'm trying to help here," Edward says coldly.
"Some help you are." Envy sneers. "How 'bout you focus on opening the fucking Gate instead of traipsing around saving humans."
Edward's hands curl into fists, and Envy almost squirms with delight. It's been a while since Edward was the angry one.
"Thousands of lives are at stake if Al and I don't do anything! You never change, do you? You're still a selfish bitch, even after all we've done for you."
Envy ignores the icy tone in Edward's voice and meets his glare levelly. "Good. Maybe that'll be motivation for you to get rid of me."
Edward throws his hands up in the air and groans. "I don't know why I put up with you! It was Al's idea to keep you."
"I'm not a fucking pet," Envy deadpans.
"Well, you sure would be hopeless and probably dead without us, like a lost little puppy," Edward mocks. "After that incident with the authorities..."
Envy makes a move to strangle him, but Edward hastily says, "Al will be back soon. He won't be happy to see you made a mess of his room."
Envy scowls and stops. Guilt-tripping. He can't believe Edward's using his soft spot for the younger, less-annoying Elric as blackmail to clean up. Edward laughs at his disgruntled look as he reluctantly moves to pick up the broken lamp.
"Al bought dinner, so come down when we call for you."
"'m not hungry," Envy mutters.
Edward rolls his eyes as he turns around, unable to resist dishing out one more taunt. "Come on, Envy. Humans get hungry."
"I'm not fucking human!" But the growl from Envy's stomach protests otherwise. Edward cracks up.
"Fuck off, shorty!" Envy screams.
Edward barely has enough time to shut the door behind him before Envy flings the lamp at it.
There's one thing that would make my day, darlings, I think you know what.
TBC.