You've been warned!
We all wanted to know what was wrong with him. Since our second week into summer break, he had been withdrawn . He did nothing but sit in his room, not answering his cell, home line, or e-mail. A couple of us had even tried to see him at home, but to no avail. His mother was so worried about him, saying she only saw him when he decided to use the bathroom or to get a drink. She didn't know when the last time he ate was.
Sora has never been one to talk about his own personal feelings. He's the type of kid who's more worried about other people than himself. Like, when his father died two years ago when Sora was 14, not once did we see him cry. He sat by his mother the whole time, a smile on his face trying to calm her down. Even I broke down when it happened. But no, not once did we see him cry. He may not be very physically strong, but emotionally, he's a hell of a lot stronger than anyone I know.
Back on track. We had tried and tried for weeks to find out what was wrong with him. School was then in only 3 days, and none of us had heard from him. His mother mentioned that the one time that she did get a glance at his face, it was tear streaked, bags under his eyes, he was pale, sickly looking and his hair was in complete disaray. That was a week ago . That was the only time she got a good look at him.
She called us every other day, informing us whether she had seen Sora or not. She had been so worried that he was starving himself, she left food outside of his door everyday, but when she went to bed at night and walked by his door, it was all still there. We were worried about her as well. Worried she was going to stress herself out.
We took shifts, one of us was always at the house to be with her and keep a look out for Sora.
We'd all thought this summer would be the greatest. We'd left school with great big smiles on our faces, great report cards in our hands, planning out our summer. To say Sora ruined it, would be harsh. I'm totally sure that his reason for the way he is now, is totally understandable. He just isn't one to do this stuff. And that just made it all worse... That's why I was on my way to his house. I was not going to leave until I got to the bottom of it. I had to know what the hell was going on with my best friend.
†
Walking into his house, I saw his mother curled up on the couch, sipping tea and watching the telly on minimum volume. She looked a total mess. Her long, light brown hair was up in a messy bun, he face was pale, making her look so much older than the 38 years that she was. She was looking thinner than usual, and it looked as though she hadn't slept in months. She was stressed. And I really couldn't blame her.
I removed my shoes and walked in to kneel by her.
"Mom?" I whispered. All of us called her 'mom'. She refused to talk to us unless we did. So, we humoured her. She turned to look at me with her sad eyes. "Sweetheart, has he come out of his room yet?" She sniffed, holding back a sob and shook her head. I grabbed her hand and held it with both of mine.
"Oh, Riku! You have to help him! Please!" She whispered, tearing up. "I need to know what is wrong with my baby. If anyone can get him to open up, it's you darling. It's always been you." She broke into quiet tears, hugging me close. The only thing I could do at that point was hold her and try to calm her down.
God, I hated seeing her like this.
When she had calmed down five minutes later, I pulled back. She smiled softly at me, placing her hand on my cheek. "Riku, I believe you are the only one who can help him. Give it your best."
Nodding, I stood up and softly padded up the stairs. I knew this house inside and out. You could blindfold me and I could find my way anywhere in here. As I walked along the hall leading to Sora's room, I took my time so I could look at the pictures. They were all of Sora, his mom, his dad, and even me. There was the odd one of the other kids, but I was present in so many of them. Well, we had been best friends since before we started school. Our moms had been best friends since elementary school. We all took it hard when my mom passed.
When I got to his room, the door was closed. I did nothing but sit infront of it and listen tio the sounds coming from inside. Music could be heard, no surprise, bu what was shocking, was the very small, very broken and hurt voice, singing to the lyrics. It honestly broke my heart to listen to him. He normally had such a beautiful voice and I loved listening to him sing, but this just hurt.
I waited until the song was over before I softly spoke his name. All sound stopped. I said his name again, just a little louder and waited. The bed creaked, but nothing else happened. Standing up, I placed my hand on the handly and told him I was coming in. I expected the handle to be locked, but to my surpise, it clicked open.
Opening the door, I found it was completely black inside. closing the door, I pushed away the urge to turn on the light. I would take this slowly as not to scare him away.
"Sora?" I whispered. I heard him sniffle, and I made my way to his bed. Sitting down , I stared straight ahead at the wall. "Sora, you have us worried." Nothing. "Please, talk to me."
Usually, the trick wasn't getting him to talk; it was getting him to stop talking. The eerie quiet was deafening. As my eyes adjusted to the dark, I could make out the shapes of the furniture in his room. If I could see all that, I could probably see Sora. but, I decided I would not turn to see him. I hadn't known if he would appreciate that.
Keeping my voice as soft as possible, I spoke up again. "Sora, please. You have no idea how hard it is on me, us. We have been worried sick, and I think it's about time you told us what was wrong."
I heard a whimper and felt the bed move. Next, I felt him sit on the edge of the bed, leaning against me. "Riku..." He whispered. I had to strain to hear it, but I heard. "Riku..."
His voice was full of so many emotions. It killed the soul to hear him.
His shoulders started shaking, letting me know he was crying. He turned his head so his face was burried into my shoulder. I turned towards him and pulled him into my chest. His sobs then became vocal. Not loud, obnoxious sobs either. The kind that were quiet, restraint, yet loud enough to make you die a slow, painful death. I held him close to me, rocking slightly.
After a couple minutes, he finally calmed down slightly. He stood up and walked towards the door. Just when I thought he would walk out, he flicked on the light switch. I gasped at the sight. It was worse than his mother had said. He was deathly looking. The bags under his eyes were so blackish purple against his almost white skin. His eyes had lost that beautiful lustre. His hair was a complete mess, sticking up in places that were abnormal, even for Sora. He looked thinner, starved. I guess he hadn't been eating...
"Sora..." I whispered, my mouth going slack. He whimpered again and hung his head, hugging himself. "Sora. Oh my god. What happened?"
He walked towards me and fell into my arms. "Riku it was fucking horrible!" He sobbed, clutching my shirt. I stroked his hair. Sora didn't swear often. Usually, if he did, he would blush a cute shade of pink and try to hide.
"Tell me. Tell me everything." I continued with the soft voice, afraid to scare him away. He nodded and clung to me tighter. What he had to say, would definately be a horride memory for him to relive, and a horride story for me to hear.
"Remember the... the night we all went to the movies? The night I said I would be fine to walk home alone?" He questioned in a soft tone. I nodded. I remembered well. It was the night before Sora started shutting himself up. I automatically thought of the worst possability. He walked home, alone, at night. What else could have happened other than him getting raped?!
"Well... I decided I was going to cut through the alley way. I know, not the best choice." He took in a deep, shuddering breath. "In the alley way, three people were arguing. I was going to just continue through as if nothing was happening. Their argument was getting out of hand by the time I reached them. As I was about the go by them, one of them pulled a gun. A gun, Riku! I saw everything. Right infront of me, he shot the guys. Right infront of me!
He turned towards me and smirked. One of those smirks that turn your blood cold and make you feel sick to your stomach. I went to run but he got to me and threw me against the wall. Riku, I was so scared, I didn't know what to do. There were two dead bodies only a few feet away, the murderer leaning against me... I tried to push him away, but he only pinned my hands to the wall. I almost lost conciousness there. I almost lost it, I was so scared. Right now, I wish I could have!"
He bust. He started crying. Long, and hard. It was a gut wrenching sound. And I fucking hated it! I held him closer, me head resting against the top of his. I let him calm down before asking him to continue the story. He sniffled but nodded. Still holding onto me, he continued.
"He started rubbing against me, moaning as if he was in total bliss. The sick bastard was getting off on me!... I kept my head to one side, trying to block everything out. But then, he grabbed me. He grabbed me and started rubbing me. And my trechorous body reacted! I felt disgusted! I... was so lost. I knew what was going to happen. I just knew. But I didn't want to. I didn't want anything but to get away from the freak at that point in time, RIku.
Anyway... when he seemed satisfied enough, he undid his pants, and pulled them right down his legs, his undergarments as well. He then got mine. Once I had my lower clother half way down my legs, he turned me over and thrust into me. My god, it was so much fucking pain Riku! So much! I wish I had died."
By then, Sora was crying all over again. I couldn't blame him. He'd been raped, and seen the murder of two people! How sick could some people get?! I was feeling so disgusted. I was angry. I was heartbroken for the boy in my arms.
"I felt broken inside. I felt as if I was worth nothing. While he was... thrusting into me... he wrapped his hand around me and pumped me. I felt dirty. God, you have no idea how horride it was Riku. When he had finished with me, he just threw me to the ground and walked away, laughing. Laughing! That bastard had stolen an intimate moment from me and walked away laughing! And me, being the weak little fool that I am, did nothing but sit there and cry..."
The waterworks started again, but I didn't care. I was angrier than I'd ever been. I clutched him tightly to me. Before even realizing it, I had started crying too. Not that Sora would know, but I did. What I was feeling was beyond words.
"Riku, I never should have walked alone! I... I... Oh my god... Riku, please... don't let him come for me again! Please Riku! Don't let anything else happen to me!"
I nodded. "Sora, no one will ever do that you again. I'll be with you from now on." I meant every word. He burried his face into my chest and cried. Just cried.
We must have been standing there for what seemed like forever. Finally, I pulled away from him, holding his shoulders, and looking into his eyes. "Sora, I wont ever let that happen again. I promise. As long as I am here, I will protect you."
He smiled and nodded. It was a sad smile, but a smile that held so much that I could only smile slightly back. This boy had everything stolen from him, but he was pulling through. I stick to what I said. Sora is the strongest boy I know. Not physically, but mentally.
†
It's been months since that night in Sora's room. We told his mother that night what had happened and there were a great many tears. Sora accepted help and went to a psychiatrist. He only attended maybe four sessions before he deemed he was fine with everything. I was with him during the last session. He claimed that while he had friends like me, he didn't need someone else to help him. She only smiled and nodded. I felt oddly giddy at his words.
Schools been great for us. He's doing good in school, and is fine around people now. He doesn't flinch when we touch him when playing around, but he gets wierd around others.
That night in Sora's room made me realize that I harboured feelings for my bestfriend. Feelings of deep adoration. I wanted to be with him. To protect him from harms way. I wanted to hold him in my arms for long periods of time, wanted to kiss him softely to let him know everything would be alright. I felt a need to hold him against me in bed on the verge of falling into a deep sleep with the one I loved. I felt my heart yearn to tell him I love him and have him say it back.
So I acted on it. Just the other week I told him everything. And, to my surprise, he smiled and hugged me. When we parted, he looked to be crying, but a grin was plastered on his face. The feeling had been mutual. We came straight out and told our friends, they accepted us, no problem! The rest of the school had been hard to convince, but they give us no problems.
I'm supposed to be getting ready. I'm taking Sora to a carnival. You should have seen his face when I mentioned it yesterday. He looked so happy. And I know I couldn't have been happier being with him.
Oh, and the bastard who raped Sora, he was arrested. Seems Sora wasn't the only one he got to. Sora was just the first one to say anything to the authoraties. That sick freak is looking at a life time in a state prison.
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