Crossing Lines
By Joan Powers
A/N I haven't read the spoilers for Gum Drops in great detail, yet due to all the rumors about proposed changes in this upcoming episode, I'm writing it the way I think it should happen. As always, thanks to smryczko for her insight and advice.
Summary: During an out of town case, Sara and Grissom spend an unexpected night alone in a motel room.
Type: G/S angst
Timeline/Spoilers: Season 6 Upcoming episode Gum DropsRating: PG-13 or K+
It would be an understatement to say that she was surprised when she opened the door of her motel room to find Grissom standing there. But her rational mind rapidly took over, allowing her to reach a more logical conclusion.
The case, he wants to talk about the case.
Yet when she studied his expression, that didn't seem to fit. She knew that look when inspiration suddenly hit him like a sledgehammer. When that happened the excitement about him was typically palpable; it was infectious. She relished that look, that telltale gleam in his eyes that screamed he was on to something. But that wasn't what she was seeing.
"Can I come in?" he mumbled a bit impatiently, perhaps a little embarrassed to be standing outside in his gray flannel pajama pants, black LVPD Forensics T-shirt and bare feet. "Greg snores – loudly."
Sara could barely stifle her laughter for Grissom seemed so pathetic. What choice fodder for teasing poor Greg mercilessly. She'd look forward to doing that.
"Of course." She stepped back, allowing him to enter.
In typical form, Grissom avoided small talk and normal social graces. He automatically began checking out the furniture in her room. He selected the largest chair and started to drag it closer to the coffee table.
Sara caught on to his plan. "You've got to be kidding. It's a big bed. I won't bite. Besides if you're tired now, think how your neck and back will feel in the morning."
He paused, considering her point, while thoughtfully rubbing the back of his neck as if assessing how much damage he could safely inflict upon it. Then he sighed.
"Ok."
Sara's laptop computer was balanced on one end of the bed so she headed in that direction while Grissom gingerly perched on the opposite side.
"Were you working on something? Don't let me disturb you."
Yeah, having you in bed beside me won't be a distraction at all.
Even though she doubted she could sleep, she sensed how weary he was so she shut down the computer. "I had a hunch, but it didn't pan out." She placed the laptop on the nightstand beside her.
Now they were both sitting on top of the bedspread, awkwardly clinging to their respective edges of the mattress as much as they could safely manage, which was utterly foolish since a large chasm existed between them. Neither was very comfortable.
It was odd to see Grissom looking so tired, almost down. Maybe even defeated. In fact, this case seemed to be getting under his skin, given his outburst earlier that day. That didn't happen very often. So many times in the past, Grissom had lectured her on not becoming emotionally involved in cases. The tables had seemly turned. He appeared almost, vulnerable.
"Tired?" she asked.
"Exhausted."
"Why don't we turn off the lights and try to get some sleep? With fresh eyes, we'll see more in morning," she recommended. He agreed. She rose to flip the light switches and check the lock on the door. When she returned to the bed, the covers were turned down.
"Not going to be very comfortable lying on top," Grissom stated logically.
She slipped into the bed, gratefully pulling the sheet and blanket up to her neck. She was relieved that he'd brought that up, for even wearing her worn sweat pants and faded Harvard jersey she'd been getting chilly.
Time in the dark had a life of its own. As an insomniac, she recognized its subtle nuances. As they lay there, flat on their backs trying to rigidly adhere to unspoken boundaries, she wasn't sure how much time had elapsed before he spoke.
"Why do people do these things Sara?"
At first she though she must be dreaming, Grissom didn't talk like that, especially not to her and not in that tone of voice, with hints of raw pain. It wasn't as if they were having yet another distant philosophical discussion. Then she realized he'd turned on his side to face her, she heard him moving and saw his shadowy outline. He was waiting for an answer.
"I don't know." Somehow the darkness and her inability to fully gage his reaction led her to feel closer to him. "It's funny I used to think that there were good people and bad people in the world, and if we just got rid of all the bad people then the rest of us would be safe."
"And now…" his voice seemed closer.
"You know it's not that simple. Look at some of the atrocities we've seen seemingly normal people commit. I think extreme stress or circumstances, such as loss of a job or a loved one, can force good people to cross that line." This wasn't an easy conversation for her, because she couldn't help but think of her parents and her conflicted feelings about them.
"Maybe good or bad is more of a matter of where you cross the line?"
"Or what pushes you to it," Sara replied. "I can't for the life of me think of any way to rationalize what this creep has done."
"I can't either. I don't know how to help these people Sara." Despair was evident in his voice.
Her hand immediately flew across the gap between them, contacting his forearm and than squeezing it gently. Then he shoved his hand onto hers.
"We'll figure something out baby. Don't worry. Try to get some rest," she gently assured him. Rather than backing to their respective edges, they remained as they were, lying on their sides facing each other, with only their hands touching. After several minutes, Sara could discern the change in his breathing and his grip loosened as he fell asleep.
Unfortunately, Sara most likely would not fall asleep due to her insomnia. Usually she preferred to read to help the time pass, but she looked forward to spending a few hours so tantalizingly close to the man she cared for so deeply. Eventually she turned on to her back to get more comfortable and despite her prediction, she managed to drift off.
About four in the morning, she woke up, urgently needing to use the bathroom. However she was shocked to find herself nestled tightly against Grissom's body. His arm was wrapped about her. It was so wonderful she hated to break contact. But she didn't have a choice in the matter.
She tried to move his arm but it wouldn't budge, his grip was strong. Finally getting a bit desperate, she woke him up.
"Grissom? Grissom!" She half-whispered.
"Huh?' he responded groggily.
"Let me go, I have to use the bathroom," she urgently pleaded.
It took him a moment to figure things out but then he complied.
When she returned, she climbed into the bed and cautiously inched closer to Grissom. She didn't know who had made the first move and she didn't want to be accused of taking advantage of the situation or reading something into it that wasn't really there. But it was so nice in his arms. Should she move closer? She didn't want to be too forward. He solved her dilemma for her by reaching for her and pulling her back to their original position.
"C'mon honey, let's get some sleep," his words slurred together.
When sunlight began to stream into their hotel room, Sara found herself still in his arms. She savored the sensations for a while, sensing that Grissom wasn't ready for more than this at this time. In fact, she wondered if he'd planned on waking up before she did so he could sneak off and pretend that nothing happened. She laughed for she knew that was exactly what he'd do, act like nothing happen, like nothing had changed between them.
But she knew better, they both did. He'd already crossed a line.
THE END