note: I need some inspiration. I still do. Please, if you review, leave a phrase or word or song or something that you find emotionally...refreshing.
blank&white
by ash!trik
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series: kingdom hearts
pairing: AXes
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b l a n k & w h i t e
[one-shot]
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disclaimer: I own nothing.
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Axel hates the white.
Everyday, he sits there (though he's never sure whether it's the same place, because you couldn't tell). Everyday, he sees the blank nothingness of his room and never stops despairing – but he's not actually despairing, really, because he can't. No heart means no feelings, right?
Wrong.
There was no other way to describe it. He can feel the despair clenching his non-existent heart and making it beat hard and loud. He can feel the way his mind always tries to drown itself whenever the emptiness comes back. He can just feel it.
And now Axel despairs, and waits, sitting in his room with nothing to do but sigh and occasionally whimper (only if it gets real bad, because Axel's no wimp, of course), and trying to not open his eyes so that he'll not see the never-ending nothing.
There's only one light in his life that wouldn't ever hurt him, but the light was gone at the moment. His light was flighty, prone to pain, and most often always by his side. But sometimes his light would go off on a mission, and Axel would get stuck again, right here in his room, just sitting and sitting and despairing and despairing…
Sometimes, he likes being assigned to the gruesome missions the Organization completes. Sometimes, he even likes to maybe fail them, so that Leader will punish him and place him in the dark, dark jail cell that let in no light. But sometimes after doing that, he starts to miss his one and only light. .
But it's better than the white, Axel thinks. And he knows it's true. After all, the white is pure and innocent and beautiful – and so blinding, so painful.
The white?
Axel hates it…
"Yo, Axel," Roxas grins, sliding smoothly out of his dark portal – his portal, which had shattered the white nothingness of Axel's room.
And Axel grins back, opening his eyes. Now, the room wasn't so white anymore.
"Nothing much, kiddo. Just meditating."
Roxas scoffs and plops down on the floor beside him. The portal slips back closed, but it Axel still feels perfectly fine without its soothing darkness there. It didn't matter if his eyes were open and he could see all the white. It was comforting, really, the blackness of Roxas's cloak and the crimson red blood splattered on it.
To Axel, at the moment, everything is not so empty anymore. Even the space where his heart should be.
Because Roxas is the only light for him.
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got it memorized?
A/N – 10.08.09 [ash!trik]
I've been forcing these out recently and I'm starting to think it's a bad idea.
But who wants to study physics?
…Exactly.
Have a nice day.