// Heyy! Well, this is my first fic I've posted here for Harry Potter. I've written a few things but they've never made it past my saved folder. However, I spent a while on this and thought, what the hell, let's try it. So I have. All reviews are welcome, I hope you like it! BTW I also wasn't sure what rating this would be under, I believe its nowhere near a M… but some people might want to look at it differently. It's based on the song 'When You're Gone' By Avril Lavigne. //

Disclaimer: I do not own any Harry Potter Characters nor do I own the song 'When You're Gone'

I've always needed time

On my own

Hermione stared solemnly at the homely walls of the old café. She was sitting quietly in one of the two plush emerald and purple chairs that flanked a small mahogany coffee table. She looked down at the rich coloring and plucked absently at the emerald threads. She stared silently at the arm of the chair and her own fingers intertwined with beautiful emerald colorings. Memories washed over her of so many years and the tears threatened to overtake her.

I never thought I'd

Need you there when I cried

She pushed them back, holding them at the bay with the positive thoughts, of unfulfilled promises and the day when Draco Malfoy would return to her. Hermione picked up her cup of coffee from the table and she leant back in the chair, pulling her legs up and tucking them beneath her. She held her coffee cup with both hands and stared down at the dark coloring. She closed her eyes, the picture of sadness, and thought back on his departure. She remembered back when she'd first cried in front of him and how he'd held her.

"She was everything to me." Hermione sobbed into the drenched pillow on their bed as she cried over the loss of her mother.

Draco sat beside her but didn't touch her. "I know how you feel Mione. No woman could ever replace your mother; no matter how similar they might have been."

Hermione looked up and him with puffy eyes. "But I love her." She whimpered.

Draco looked at her with tender eyes and gently moved closer, wrapping her in his strong embrace. She discarded the pillow and let herself fall into him. "I miss her so much Draco; I've never missed someone so much in my life."

"I know sweetheart. I know."

Hermione smiled slightly, she'd missed more than one now. And it had that similar gut wrenching feeling; like your stomach was falling. Like when you miss the last step on the stairs and you feel sick as you think you'll never stop falling. She laughed bitterly as she remembered telling him she needed her space; how she was independent. Draco had gone all huffy for a week and tried desperately to explain to her just how much he had to be with her; Hermione laughed it off as hormones. Now she realized just what he meant; how he'd portrayed his feelings of her through his eyes and the way he touched her fleetingly with the tips of his fingers.

Draco stared at her, exasperated. "Granger I want you so much; don't you get that?"

Hermione sighed and nodded, "I do Draco; but I can't have you hovering around me all the time. It gets to the point where I want to scream."

Draco shook his head, "You're looking at this the wrong way."

Hermione smiled, "Really?"

Draco nodded. "You get to the point where you hang around someone day and night just to see their face. You follow them wherever they go so you know they're safe. You yearn for them with a passion so strong it engulfs your entire body. You can't think clearly when you're not with them, you can't concentrate. All you want is to be with them." He looked at her with his piercing silver blue eyes, "Then it's all ok."

"Then it's all ok?" She asked with a raised brow. He nodded softly.

"Then it's all ok,"

Hermione's arm tingled as she remembered his long fingers resting on her forearm; that shiver that would course through her body at the faintest touch. The way he could make her giddy with the faintest brush of his lips on any part of her skin… she gave herself to him.

"You are so, beautiful." Draco told her softly as he kissed her neck, his velvet lips leaving burning trails where they touched her skin. His hands held her waist lightly, his finger tips brushing against her naked skin.

Hermione sighed and ran a hand through his platinum blonde hair. "Mmmm."

"I don't know what I'd do without you." He whispered as he let his tongue dart out and lick the shell of her ear. Hermione shivered.

Draco turned his head and swiftly pressed his lips to hers in a possessive kiss as his hands moved up and deftly undid the clasp of her black bra. He kissed the top of her left breast before nuzzling her neck.

"You know I love you, don't you?"

Hermione breathed softly into his ear. "I do, and I love you just as much."

And the days feel like years

When I'm alone

A whole year ago today. A whole year he'd been gone; an entire year, three hundred and sixty five days, twelve months… How ever Hermione looked at it, it seemed like forever, it was all she could do to keep herself from breaking down and sobbing her lonely heart out. A year ago she'd slept with him on his last night with her. He'd held her tightly to him and she held him as tight in fear that he would let her go and never return. She'd sobbed quietly into his chest; she knew there was a slim chance of him ever returning.

"Don't leave me Draco." She sobbed into his chest.

Draco held her head and her body as he kissed her forehead. "I don't want to love; I never want to leave you."

Hermione hiccupped. "Why do you go where I can't follow?"

"Because that's what I do. It's what I've always done. It's my place."

Hermione started to cry harder and hit him with her right hand, "I don't want it to be your place!" She almost screamed, hysterical as she cried and he tried to calm her. "I don't want you to go, I won't allow it!"

"Hermione!" Draco grabbed her wrists and forced her to look at him. "I love you, don't you ever damn well forget it. I will do everything I fucking can to get back to you; you know I will." He had to be strong for her, but Hermione had seen it in him that night. That glimmer of fear that showed he was just as afraid as she was.

"I love you so much Draco."

"I know sweetheart; I know."

It hurt Hermione on a whole new level. She'd never loved anyone like she'd loved him. Of all the people that went to fight the final war Hermione's heart cried out for the platinum blonde pureblood that reined from Slytherin House. They weren't just in love, they loved each other. They loved each other unselfishly, and Hermione thought that maybe that love would bring him back to her.

And the bed where you lie

Is made up on your side

She remembered holding him that one last second before he apparated away. The next morning she woke alone and cold; his side of the bed untouched as if no one had been there. To Hermione no one had. Not even she had moved across to that side. She remembered padding around the house in a dream, she'd mourned for him, and had resorted to sitting in the corner of their wardrobe where is clothes were. She'd sat there for hours, drenching herself in the smell of him, trying to remember what he looked like in her mind without seeing a picture.

Hermione wandered slowly through their house, staring at the pictures on the wall. She stopped at each one and drank in the moving scene. In her mind she remembered what they'd been doing that day, and where they were. The first was them both outside Hogwarts, Draco had his arms around her waist and both were waving happily at the camera. The second was of them at the beach, Hermione dripping wet and sitting on Draco's lap as he kissed her passionately on his deck chair. The third was of them at Harry and Ginny's wedding. Draco had her in his arms and his face held a look of smugness as if to say, 'Yes, she's all mine.'

Hermione remembered crying herself to sleep one night in their pokey corner of their closet, surrounded by Draco's comforting smell. She held a shirt to her chest as she sobbed; trying to feel as close to him as she possibly could.

When you're gone

The pieces of my heart

Are missing you

Hermione took a small sip form her mug and let the hot drink scald her throat and burn her into unawareness. She stared sadly at the couples with linked arms and laughing with one another. She remembered having that once. They war had ended eight months ago. They said that no one who came home never made it out alive. Hermione had kept a candle burning in her soul for him.

The Minister of Magic stared solemnly out at the sea of people. "The relief that over comes me as I tell you this is great; the war is over. And we have prevailed."

The crowd cheered in sad relief and overwhelming happiness.

The Minister coughed, "But it is beaten down by a sadness many of you will experience for how long I cannot tell. Many brave witches and Wizards gave their lives to save us; and some will not return. For that I am so, so, sorry."

When you're gone

The face I came to know

Is missing too

With each passing week the candle burnt down, and after three months the candle had died and Hermione's heart had died along with the candle. His image faded from her mind bit by bit as she tried to remember him; she resorted to pictures; but she wanted so desperately to conjure up his image without needing any help. Harry and Ron had returned; and Hermione's heart had fluttered with relief when she saw them, and it kept fluttering for so long as it waited for her man to come back as well. The fluttering died long ago.

"HARRY!" Hermione started crying as she flung herself at her childhood friend. Ron appeared as well and Hermione gave a sob of relief and ran to him, burying her head in his dirty clothed chest.

"We've missed you Mione." Ron told her as his voice broke and she felt the hot sting of tears that weren't hers.

"I've missed you both as well, so much." She looked stricken for a minute before she looked up and Harry and Ron. "Where's Draco?"

They remained silent.

"Where is he!?" Her voice held that heart wrenching panic as she waited for an answer. Harry's voice broke.

"We don't know."

I've never felt this way before

We were made this way for each other

Out here forever

I know we were

"You bring out the worst in me Granger." Draco told her in a husky voice as he pinned her to the wall. Hermione laughed as she wrapped her naked legs around his naked waist.

"I know; don't you love it?"

He growled as he moved his hips against hers, but not giving her what she wanted. "You make me feel alive."

Hermione bit her lip as she held onto his shoulders and pressed her upper body against his. "You make me want to live." She told him truthfully.

He looked up at her and grinned, "We were meant for each other don't you think?" He slid into her, and Hermione groaned as she replied her answer.

"Made for each other… forever."

Can't you see you're killing me? Hermione thought sadly. She wasn't sure what was killing her. The feeling of loss. The fear of never finding anyone like him again; of having that passionate love… all of it added to that brutal point when she realized she just had to move on. That was the point where Hermione realized just how impossible it was. He was never coming back. Hermione had thought of this every once and a while. But it had never really sunk its terrible roots into her mind.

And all I ever wanted was for you to know

Everything I do I give my heart and soul

I can hardly breathe

I need to feel you here

With me

Hermione remembered when they'd started going steady, everything she did she gave her all. He prompted her to want to do well, even more so than before. Of all the things Hermione had ever put her effort into was their relationship. She gave him everything she had; she gave him all her love, all her affection. He never held back in telling her she was beautiful, that she was talented, that she was a brilliant cook.

Hermione smiled slightly as she remembered making dinner for him.

"Granger… This meal is beautiful."

A smiling Hermione laughed as she stood beside him as he ate, "Thank you Draco." She let her hand rest lightly on his firm shoulder.

He looked up, "But I dare say I've tasted something even better."

Hermione's eyed him carefully and she flexed her fingers on his shoulder. "Oh really? What?"

Draco grinned, and Hermione knew he'd been waiting for her to ask. "You."

Hermione sighed. Maybe she should let the roots embed themselves inside her and let them sprout to their full extent. Who knows? Hermione stared sadly out of the window as it rained. The droplets of water adding to her damp mood and making her feel depressed. She looked out at the rushing mob of people and her colorless lips moved silently. I miss you.

And when you're gone

The words I need to hear

To always get me through the day

And make it ok

I miss you

Slowly, a single tear dripped down her cheek.

// When I wrote this is it actually looked much longer; when I posted it, it decided to shorten itself, so I apologize for the length. There you have it, I hope you found it ok, and if you did please leave a review (even its telling me how horrible this was lawlz)! CC is totally welcome. 3 //