This is just an idea that I've had for nearly forever (or at least since last summer) and just now got around to writing. Enjoy!:)
JJ hadn't wanted it to go like this – not any of it was supposed to turn out anything like this – but it had. She had to do this, for her own sake, and maybe, somehow, even for Will's. So she stood there looking at her feet, just inside his front door, trying to fight the tears as she explained why she had come.
A solitary tear slipped down her cheek, and she watched it splatter onto the hardwood floor.
It felt like one more pinprick in her heart as she quietly explained, "Sometimes love slips away and you just can't get it back; let's face it."
She glanced up at him and saw the pain written across his foggy eyes. For a split second, she almost took it back, but she didn't – she couldn't. She was done trying to convince herself that she could fix him or love him enough that he would give up the alcohol. It wasn't a matter of whether or not she loved him enough; it was whether or not he loved her enough to give the drinking up for her. So far the answer had appeared to be that he didn't, and she couldn't take it any longer.
"I'm leaving town, Will," she said gently. "Between your drinking, and my job; I just can't live this life anymore; I've got to start over. I see the way out, and I'm going to take it; I'm going back to Pennsylvania."
With that she turned and left the house, going back to her car and driving away from Will LaMontagne, Jr.
"Are you sure?" Hotch asked levelly, hints of sadness and concern glinting in his dark eyes.
JJ swallowed, nodding resolutely, imploring him to understand as she said, "I don't want to spend my life jaded, waiting to wake up one day and find that I've let all these years go by wasted. I cannot become jaded, Hotch; I want to be able to enjoy my life through the lens of whatever shred of innocence I have left."
Her unit chief sighed, laying her resignation – she'd just told him it was effective immediately – back on his desk. "Alright," he replied. His tone was heavy, but his eyes weren't without understanding now as he requested softly, "Just promise me you'll keep in touch."
JJ nodded, and without further comment from either of them, her boss came around his desk and hugged her before – for the second time that day – she turned around and walked out. Because that was what she had to do in order to rediscover the person that she wanted to be. As it was, Agent Jareau had not been that person.
Will stared down at the empty glass in his hand, hating the liquor for not keeping its promises. JJ was gone from his life forever, and the whisky wasn't getting rid of the pain. He groaned, dropping his head into his hands before turning his gaze to stare at the whisky bottle beside him on the counter.
That's when it hit him where the problem had started. When he had lost his partner to a bullet to the heart the year after he and JJ had met, he had started drinking in earnest, and this was where it had gotten him.
In one swift move, he snatched up the bottle and shattered it against the side of the sink, watching in satisfaction as the amber liquid flowed down the drain.
It was time for him to be a man and stop living in the past. Things that were even more life-changing were going on in the present, and he had to face them.
Starting with leaving the place that daily brought back the memories of his failure to his partner.
"But come on, Detective!" his boss pleaded. "I know you tend to have a few too many on the weekends, but you still come into work as one of my best guys; I need you here – the department needs you!"
Will stood his ground, saying sharply, "JJ's the best thing that's ever happened to me, and I need her. I've got to find her, and when I do, I've got a feeling we won't be coming back here. I have spent so much time in the bottle, that if something doesn't change – if a lot of things don't change – I'm going to wake up one day and find that I let all of these years go by wasted – so many more then what I already have – and I just can't do that to myself or to JJ. I'm sorry," Will lay his gun and badge on the chief's desk, saying, "but this is the last time you'll see me."
The sunset really was pretty that evening, JJ realized absently as she drove along the highway. Or was it always that way? It really had been long enough since she had taken notice that she couldn't remember. There was something truly cleansing about seeing the sunset again – really seeing it – and despite the roller coaster of a day that she'd had, it made her smile.
She was done with wishing for things that weren't going to happen. She was done with missing the still of the morning and the colors of the night sky like this one. She wasn't spending anymore time wasted on her old life.
So she kept driving along towards her home state until the moon and the sun were both suspended in the sky, having no idea what Will was doing at that very moment.
Will drove like a madman to get back to his house, hastily throwing together a suitcase so that he could go find the love of his life. Stepping into the bathroom, he reached into the medicine cabinet for his toothbrush, but stopped when he caught sight of himself in the mirror.
His eyes were clearly – really, truly clear of any of the affects of alcohol – for the first time in awhile. Even considering that JJ was gone, the fact that he was totally sober for once – in a stretch that he was determined was going to last the rest of his life – well, that felt amazing.
His attitude perked up barely a little as he threw his toothbrush into his suitcase and zipped the mess closed.
Now it was time to go find his JJ.
Will had caught up with her, she realized with a jolt of shock, watching in her side mirror as his familiar vehicle pulled onto a side road behind her. She took a deep, steadying breath before stepping out of her car and closing the door, leaning against her hood with her arms crossed as she watched him climb out of his own car as well.
"What do you want?" she said, wishing that she had been able to sound a little sharper then what she did.
"I want you back," he answered simply, stepping in front of her with eyes that begged forgiveness.
She shot back, "You want your whisky more."
"No, I don't," he said, laying a hand on her arm. "I made a mistake in the whisky, JJ; I see that now. I want to get away from it – I mean it this time – but I'm going to need your help to do that. Please."
JJ almost wanted to shrug off his touch; she wanted to point out how many other times they'd had this conversations, and how he would inevitably go back on his word. She didn't do any of those things, though, because this time there was something different in his eyes – clarity and a genuine sincerity that she hadn't seen before, and more then she wanted anything, she wanted to trust that look.
"I can't go back to D.C. with you, Will; I already quit the Bureau. My mom's even found a job for me in my hometown."
He smiled then, revealing, "I don't have a reason to go back either, JJ; I quit my job too, and you're going to be in Pennsylvania. I want to go with you, darlin'."
JJ looked away from his soulful eyes with their heartfelt gaze, trying to take this all in. "You quit your job for me?" she whispered.
"I don't want to end up jaded either, sweetheart. I don't want to wake up one day and find that I've let all these years go by wasted. I don't wanna keep on wishing; missing the still of the morning and the color of the night. So help me, I ain't spending no more time wasted." He tilted her face back towards his, pressing their foreheads together as he whispered, "But if you'll let me, I'd like to spend the rest of my life with you."
A sob escaped JJ's throat, giving release to all of her pent up emotions and her sudden relief and overwhelming love for this man in front of her. Will pulled her close, his arms tightening around her waist as she tilted her mouth up to his and kissed him before whispering simply, "Okay."
"I love you," he murmured as she leaned her head onto his shoulder, keeping their arms locked around one another.
"I love you too."
Hopefully you all liked this! Reviews make my day full of rainbows and unicorns, if you feel so inclined; thanks!:)