Title: Kisses and Killings; Permanent Placement Program

Summary: Welcome to a world where the best hide in the streets of Roseville. Welcome to a world where nothing is as it seems. Welcome to the world of Andi, DeeDee, Carlos and Will--Welcome to the Permanent placement Program. Welcome to hell.

Rating: T

Warning: Contains references to violence, self-harm, mental disorders and possibly sex.

Disclaimer: I haven't ever owned the Gallagher Girls.

Claimer: I own Andrea Jones, Carlos Ruiz, William Marr and the Permanent Placement Program.

A/N: Welcome to the re-write of The Permanent Placement Program! This one will hopefully be better than the original. Expect updates on Mondays; if I can't I'll post an A/N.

Being a girl is hard enough, but fitting a few extra names and lives into that knockoff designer purse alongside that all important lip-gloss is even harder.

Believe me on that, I know.

See, in the whole world, there are about a thousand people who are unique, people who are more different than you'd ever even think.

They're all under the age of eighteen, and all of them have double lives.

Don't get me wrong, it's not like they're cheating on girlfriends or boyfriends or something like that. The percentage on THAT is WAY higher.

Alright, flat out, I'm a 3P-T/LUSR/U42/91.

In human terms, I'm a Permanent Placement Program Trainee, Located in the US, specifically Roseville, and a part of Unit 42. My ID number is 91.

To clear that up, there's a group of non-normal kids in the world. In Roseville, there are four of us.

There's me, of course.

There's my partner, Carlos Ruiz.

There's my leader, DeeDee Thompson.

And her counterpart, Will Marr.

The four of us are a team, a seamless unit. We've been together since we were in diapers, for God's sake!

We're part of the Permanent Placement Program, as I mentioned earlier. We abbreviate it as Three-Pee, 3P, but we ourselves are Three-Pee-Dash-Tees. 3P-Ts.

Basically, the Permanent Placement Program is for spies born and bred. We've lived in regular families, with regular lives, going to regular schools, having regular lives, being regular kids.

We don't gossip about that cheerleader cheating on her jock boyfriend, we don't bond over chick flicks and shopping. We gossip about the new level 8 uranium powered gun that we may or may not get to use, we bond over stun guns and suicide rings.

We are never, ever, regular. God, I hate that word, because after the school bell rings, we are new people, never regular people. Who are we really?

Spies.

Naturally, the rest of the world—even the spy world—doesn't know about us. We're that good, that high level of clearance.

My own cousin, one Tina Walters, doesn't even know I'm a spy, and she's one herself! All she knows is that her cousin, Andi, has always been a bit sneakier than normal people, but she passed that off as nosiness.

That's a good thing, really, because I don't want her to be involved in the 3P world. She's a coveops spy in her sheltered little world. She needs to stay there. It's safer.

The downside to the cool word with the stun guns and the world travel and the missions for what you believe is right...well, people die. You learn things you never wanted to know. You make lifelong friends and have them die in your arms. Your first kiss is someone's last breath. You see people bend until the break and then you have to step on the pieces. You watch as someone you love is tortured. But you get the lifelong friends—for however long your life may be. You get the cool stories to tell your children—if you even live long enough for that to happen. You get the beautiful thrills and the terrifying falls. You're a spy. It's amazing.

You may be wondering why spy parents don't enroll their children in the 3P-T world. Simple. They don't know about us. And they never will. We're too dangerous, too volatile. We've been trained for this our whole lives—there's nothing else we know how to do. You back out, you die.

It's a horrible thing, but it something we have to do. We're 3P-Ts. Eventually we'll be 3P-Fs, and 3P-Bs. Permanent Placement Program Field and Permanent Placement Program Base.

Think of it this way—if spies watch other governments, who watches them?

We do. For as long as there have been spies and governments, there's been us. We keep them in line—and to keep us from getting too powerful, no 3P lives beyond the age of 40. We don't have wheezy old guys teaching us stuff—it's twenty-five year olds and thirty-six year olds passing on their knowledge. No one can get too self-important; if they do, they die. The job is simply too dangerous. Some die before twenty—friends of mine are among them.

As for us 3P-T's, we're fairly new. The junior division was only created recently. Only thirty years ago we were started. It's a secret, learning about us. And it's a dangerous one. The woman we know as DeeDee's mother isn't her mother. Really, it's a secret agent pretending to be her mother, since her own mother was killed just for knowing who we were.

It's a horrible burden, and taxing, too. It's a strain not to kill that boy in your English class that won't quit asking you out.

But don't mind me. I'm just a high school girl. You never heard of me being a spy. I'm only Andrea Jones, a high school freshman.

You don't know anything about me. And if you're lucky, you never will.

But someone does have to know, and unfortunately, that's you. All of us 3Ps have to keep records now, so everyone can see what we've done on missions. No one believes them—they think they're novels. But they're not.

God, I wish they were. The past year has shown me everything I thought I knew was terribly, terribly wrong. But even when I thought it was right and perfect and still fun and games, I was still a person. Even now, I am, I suppose.

It just doesn't feel like it anymore.

But since my record started back when I was still naïve, that's where it'll begin for you. I warn you—it will become dark and depressing, sad and upsetting…but I lived through it. You can do me a favor and read a few pages.

C'mon, it won't hurt…much.