So the inevitable finally happened, Imogen's father had passed away, in his sleep thankfully, and the funeral had just ended. The girls were headed back to Fionas' loft and Fiona couldn't quite figure out how to comfort Imogen.
Imogen looked particularly upset and her face was red and puffy because she had been crying just moments before. She was quite prepared for her father's passing but she wasn't expecting it to be too soon so she was a bit thrown off when she received the news. Fiona looked quite upset too and she looked a bit like she'd been holding back tears, like she was trying to be strong for Imogen but she was struggling with it. Fiona slid her hand across the back seat and put it on top of Imogens' and squeezed it gently. Imogen looked up to Fiona and gave a small reassuring smile before sniffling and using her other hand to wipe the tears from her eyes.
Within a couple minutes they were opening the door to the loft and walking inside. Luckily Drew had gone to stay with Bianca for the week, mostly because he knew it was going to be rough around here for a few days now that Imogen was staying here more often. Fiona closed the door behind the two of them while Imogen scampered off to the couch and cuddled up under the fluffy blanket.
"Immy, do you want some tea or something," Fiona asked cautiously.
"Mhmm," Imogen mumbled into the blanket.
Fiona went into the kitchen and made her some tea and she put it in Imogens' favorite mug. The mug had cows around it and said moo around the top of it and for some reason Imogen loved using the mug. Fiona walked back over to the couch handing Imogen the tea she had made for her.
Imogen drank her tea and then resided to hugging her knees under the fluffy blanket. Fiona had enough room to slide behind Imogen and put her arm over her. She kissed the side of her head and then snuggled into her back holding her tightly.
They stayed like this for a good half hour before Imogen nudged Fiona so she could turn over onto her other side so they were facing each other. She looked at Fiona and then practically dove into her chest and hugged her tightly starting to softly cry and mumble words that Fiona couldn't understand. Fiona hugged her back while repeating, "It's okay, sweetie."
Imogen soon stopped crying and leaned up to look at Fiona and said, "I know, it's just I miss him already."
"If it counts for anything I miss him too," Fiona said cautiously.
"That makes me upset too, the fact that you barely got to know him and now he's gone," Imogen admitted.
Fiona was speechless, she didn't know what else she could say to comfort Imogen and make her feel better. Fiona wiped the tears from Imogens' cheeks and she leaned in and kissed her gently with her hands still on Imogens' cheeks. Imogen hugged her again this time nestling her head into Fionas' neck holding her tightly. Fiona wrapped her arms around Imogen again and they just sat there in silence again.
Soon enough Imogen mumbled something into Fionas' neck but Fiona couldn't really understand her.
"I'm sorry Immy, what did you say?" Fiona asked.
Imogen giggled a bit and leaned back, "I said I love you, Fions," she repeated before kissing Fiona.
"I love you too, Immy," Fiona said once they stopped kissing.
Imogen smiled and then kissed Fiona again. Soon enough they were making out but Fiona seemed a bit hesitant at first. Imogen was the one to pull away first and when she did she kissed Fiona on the cheek and then got up from the couch and walked into the bedroom.
"Where are you going?" Fiona asked.
"Come and find out," Imogen replied.
Fiona sighed not really wanting to get up from the couch and chase her down like she usually ends up doing at times like these but she decided that if it would make Imogen happy she would do it. She walked into the bedroom and saw Imogen curled up under the blankets in her pajamas and her hair up in pigtails.
"Come join me," Imogen said, "PJ's first though."
They both smiled brightly at each other before Fiona walked into the other room to change. Imogen scared Fiona because when she turned around Imogen was standing in the bathroom doorway just smirking at her.
"Imogen! How long have you been there?" Fiona asked quickly feeling slightly embarrassed.
"Long enough," she said smirking even more.
Fiona leaned back on the sink and pouted a bit because of how embarrassed she felt. Imogen moved over to her slowly before putting her arms around Fionas' shoulders and kissing Fiona rather passionately but gently at the same time. Fiona hesitated but eventually put her hands on Imogens' hips and kissed her back. Imogen then took Fionas' hand in her own and walked back into the bedroom with Fiona trailing close behind.
The girls quickly settled into the bed under the blankets and were making out yet again. A couple minutes later Fiona ended up on top of Imogen. Imogen took advantage of the moment and wrapped her arms around Fiona and put her hands under the back of Fionas' shirt and rested them on her lower back.
About 15 minutes later they seemed to have switched positions and now it was Fiona who had her hands resting on Imogens' back and Imogen was on top. Soon enough though Imogen was lying on her side and Fiona was lying on her back facing Imogen. Imogen leaned up and used her hand to prop her up while she pulled up Fionas' shirt just enough to see her bare stomach. She took her other hand and started tracing swirls on Fionas' stomach. Fiona just laid there smiling at Imogen the entire time.
Imogen eventually put her head on Fionas' shoulder and sort of snuggled into her side while still tracing swirls onto her stomach. Soon enough Imogen fell asleep with her hand resting softly on Fionas' stomach and within a couple minutes Fiona also feel asleep.
When Fiona woke up she spread her arm out and noticed that Imogen wasn't in bed with her. Fiona got up a little worried and walked into the other room just to find Imogen eating cereal in the kitchen. She decided that she might as well join her girlfriend and have some breakfast.
"G'morning," Imogen said perkily when she saw Fiona walking towards her.
"Morning. Feeling any better?" Fiona asked.
"Yeah, actually. Quite a bit," she replied.
Fiona walked closer and kissed Imogen good morning and said, "Well that's always good."
Imogen nodded while Fiona got some cereal of her own and ate next to Imogen standing idly in the kitchen.
"So what'd you think of last night?" Imogen asked quietly.
Fiona smiled remembering it and replied, "Very much so, we need to do stuff like that more often."
"Yeah well, we'll have a lot more time to and I'm pretty satisfied with that idea," Imogen said smirking at Fiona. "Got anything to do today?" she asked.
"Nope," Fiona replied.
"Good because I have an amazing idea of what we're going to be doing," she said innocently.
Imogen checked yet again to make sure the blindfold was still covering Fiona's eyes before leading her down the hill.
"Where are we?" Fiona asked for the fifth time.
"I told you, at a park nearby," Imogen said simply.
"So why am I blindfolded then?" Fiona asked.
"Because. It's not the fact that we're at a park it's something that's here, especially for us that's a surprise," Imogen finally admitted.
"What could it possibly be?"
"You'll find out in a minute, Fions," Imogen said.
A couple minutes Imogen stopped them and put her hands on Fionas' shoulders and turning her around a bit. Then Imogen reached up behind her head and untied the blindfold and took it off.
"Imogen, is that a-"
"Jumping Castle!" Imogen screamed like a giddy little child.
Imogen practically ran for it and was jumping around inside it before Fiona could even make her way over to it.
"Come on, are you gonna join me or what?" Imogen called while jumping up and down.
"Alright, alright," Fiona said giving in to her girlfriend.
Fiona climbed inside and Imogen took both her hands. Imogen started jumping around refusing to let go of Fionas' hands until finally, Fiona lost her balance and fell over. Imogen giggled and plopped down next to Fiona who was smiling.
"I assume this is quite amusing to you," Fiona said still smiling.
"Well, yeah. Of course it is," Imogen said while giggling some more.
Fiona couldn't help but let out a little laugh and then she just kept smiling while watching Imogen roll back and forth around the inflatable castle. Fiona leaned up against the back of it and sat there smiling and watching Imogen. Imogen jumped over to Fiona and grabbed her hands to help her up. This time Fiona was having a bit more fun with it until Imogen accidentally crashed into her and caused her to fall into the back corner.
"Sorry, Fions, I lost my balance a bit," Imogen said giggling like she wasn't really sorry about it.
Fiona smiled at her and nodded slightly like it was ok. Imogen jumped over to the corner where Fiona was and plopped down next to her again. Both of the girls just sat there smiling in silence.
Imogen broke the silence saying, "Tag, you're it."
Imogen got up and jumped to the other side after touching Fionas' arm. Fiona figured she might as well play along so she got up and went after Imogen. At first the game was pretty innocent but that would soon change. Before Fiona could even process what was happening Imogen had knocked her over onto her back and was on top of her kissing her neck gently.
Imogen then whispered in her ear, "I got you now, don't I?"
Fiona could only manage a quick and simple nod in response. Imogen then kissed Fiona while slipping one of her hands under her shirt just a little bit. They just stayed there making out for at least 20 minutes before Imogen got up and started jumping around again almost like it didn't happen. Fiona just stayed there sitting while Imogen jumped around her.
A couple minutes later Imogens' mom called asking her to come over for dinner because they needed to talk about living arrangements and that type of thing. Imogen dropped in the middle and sat down frowning after hanging up the phone. Fiona moved over to her and put her arm around Imogens' shoulders holding her tightly.
"What's wrong, Immy?" Fiona asked.
"She wants to talk about me living there all the time now and all the other things I've been avoiding dealing with," Imogen said sighing.
"Just know that you're always welcome at my place, you can stop by anytime for anything even if it's just to get away for a little while," Fiona said.
Imogen just nodded in response before getting up and saying, "Well, we better get going. Can you drop me off before you head home?"
"Sure," Fiona answered simply.
Imogen kissed Fiona on the cheek before saying goodbye and watched her as she walked down the street toward her loft before going inside. Imogen was surprised to find out that it was quiet inside until she heard dishes being put on the table. She walked into the kitchen area to see her mom putting two plates on the breakfast lounge.
"How are you today, Imogen?" Natalie asked when she saw her standing in the doorway to the kitchen.
"Pretty good, actually," Imogen responded.
"How about we sit down and eat dinner then we can talk?" Natalie asked.
Imogen just nodded in response and then moved to sit down and join her mother for dinner.
Imogen let her mom clean up the plates from dinner by herself as she just sat there in the chair awaiting the upcoming conversation.
"So, about your new living arrangements, I assume you'll be living here full time until you go off to college. You are going to college aren't you?" Natalie asked unsure of what her daughter was planning for her future.
"Yes I will be going to college," Imogen said plainly.
"Well that's good to hear. I got all your stuff and everything already. It's all upstairs in your new room," Natalie said.
"Well, thanks I guess," Imogen paused and then realized something, "You didn't look through any of my stuff, did you?"
"No, of course not. Why?" Natalie said slightly shocked at Imogens' tone.
"Nothing, it's just I don't like people going through my stuff, that's all," Imogen lied.
"Ok. Now how about you tell me about your, um, girlfriend?" Natalie asked nervously.
Imogen sighed and then said, "Fine, what do you want to know?"
"Her name's Fiona, right?" she paused to see Imogen nod, "Well then, how long have you two been together?"
"About 6 months," Imogen replied.
Her mom went through a whole bunch of questions like a typical mom would and answering all of them made Imogen realize even more why she had avoided this conversation for so long.
"So she lives alone, then?" Natalie asked.
"No, she has a roommate, Drew, but he might be moving back home soon," Imogen replied soon regretting it.
"Do you want dessert?" Natalie asked.
"Sure, I'm gonna go run upstairs real quick. Be back down in a minute," Imogen said before running up the stairs.
Once upstairs Imogen went to her 'room' where all her stuff from her real room was. She walked into the room and noticed everything was pretty much the same as back home except for all her clothes which were in boxes by the closet. Imogen knew exactly what she was looking for and she needed it really badly at that moment. She went looking for the familiar blue and green box but she couldn't find it anywhere. She knew exactly what was in there and she needed it, now. About 10 minutes later she was forced to give up and make her way back downstairs so her mom wouldn't go looking for her. Little did Imogen know things were about to get really bad.
When Imogen got back into the kitchen there was her blue and green box sitting on the counter and her mom looking worriedly up at her. She looked like she was about to cry or break down and that's when Imogen knew that her mom saw what was in the box.
"I thought you said you didn't go through my stuff," Imogen said a bit upset herself.
"I did this just happened to fall and open by itself so of course I had to pick up everything inside it and put it back," Natalie said clearly upset with it. They both stared at the box in silence waiting for one of them to speak up.
"Is this what you went upstairs looking for?" Natalie said breaking the silence.
"Sort of," Imogen said honestly, "but not for what you think."
"Then for what?" Natalie asked nearly screaming.
"I was going to get rid of them," Imogen lied.
"Good. They're already gone," Natalie stated.
"What?" Imogen said shocked heading for the box. She opened it just to see the 3 tattered journals and a couple unused bandages and what not that she had thrown in there because she had nowhere else to put them.
While Imogen was staring in disbelief at the box her mom tried to take her arm but Imogen pulled it away and took the box and stormed upstairs.
Imogen slammed the door to her room shut and started crying. Once she stopped crying so much she went through the journals to see if maybe there was one something left. When she got to the oldest journal she found exactly what she needed toward the very end of the book. Imogen tried to stop herself but she just couldn't hold back from falling into her old habits again. It was only one and it was considerably smaller than the others. She started crying again before she threw the piece of metal back into the box and pushed it under the bed.
Imogen couldn't think clearly at all, all she could think to do was grab her wrist where the cut was and to put pressure on it to make it stop bleeding.
Her mom came to her bedroom door and kept knocking and asking to come in. Imogen kept yelling at her to go away and leave her alone and eventually she gave up and left.
Imogen got up and pulled on one of her sweaters once it stopped bleeding and then grabbed her backpack and started throwing clothes in it. She put as much clothes in it that would fit and then put the backpack on. Once she was done she opened her door and stormed out of the house slamming the front door on her way out.
Imogen had been walking around for about 15 minutes before she decided that she might as well head to Fionas' loft because at least there she felt safe. So she turned around and headed towards the loft.
A couple minutes later Imogen was standing in front of Fionas' door and was just about to knock when her phone went off. It was a text from Fiona asking how dinner went and when Imogen saw it she decided to knock on the door.
Fiona opened it seconds later completely surprised that Imogen was there. She was smiling at first but one good look at Imogen showed Fiona that she had been crying and the smile from her face dropped instantly.
"Immy, what's wrong? What happened?" Fiona asked as she let Imogen into the loft.
Imogen didn't respond, instead she dropped her bag by Fiona's bedroom and then dropped herself onto the couch crawling under the fluffy blanket. Fiona came over right away and sat next to Imogen putting her hand on Imogens' back comfortingly.
"Immy, tell me what's wrong?" Fiona asked softly.
Imogen moved so that she could put her head on Fionas' lap and looked up at her with tears in her eyes before burying her head in the blanket and in Fionas' stomach.
Fiona wasn't sure what was wrong but she was determined to comfort her somehow. Fiona started brushing her hair back gently while whispering "It's okay, Immy," over and over again.
Imogen never moved from that position but eventually she did stop crying and not long after that she fell asleep.
Imogen woke up an hour later to see Fiona looking at her worriedly.
"Hey, sleepyhead," Fiona said casually when she saw that Imogen was awake.
"Hey," Imogen said tiredly.
Imogen sat up and looked at Fiona shyly and gave her a half smile.
"Do you want to talk about it now," Fiona asked cautiously.
Imogen sighed and said, "I guess I'm gonna have to at some point."
Imogen was still tired and wasn't thinking properly which would explain why she didn't think of the possible consequences when she pushed up her sleeves. Unfortunately they were pushed up just far enough to see the cut she had made just hours before and Fiona took notice to it almost immediately.
Fiona put her hands on Imogens' cheeks and looked her straight in the eyes and said, "Don't lie, did you do that to yourself?" she asked looking towards the cut on her arm, "Imogen, answer me," she said when Imogen didn't answer for some time.
Imogen started tearing up again and nodded her head slowly. Fiona wanted so badly to cry herself but she wouldn't let herself yet because Imogen needed her to be strong.
"Tell me why?" Fiona asked.
"Natalie found out and she got rid of them all, well almost all of them. I was getting better though but it set me off and I couldn't stop myself and I don't know, I just lost it and then I stormed out," Imogen said in between sobs.
"How long have you been doing this for?" Fiona asked curiously.
"Years, but I was trying to stop and I had for a while but I relapsed. You should know what that's like," Imogen said honestly not really meaning any harm by it.
"I do but why didn't you tell me about it before? Don't you trust me?" Fiona asked.
"Fions, I trust you more than anyone it's just that I thought I was better, I thought it wouldn't happen again," Imogen confessed.
"Yeah, well, I thought the same thing about my problem but I relapsed anyway. It happens, Imogen, but at least when you're feeling like you might relapse, you could at least have someone there to help you get through it," Fiona said.
"I'll keep that in mind," Imogen said, "Thanks though."
Imogen pulled down her sleeves and wiped the remaining tears from her eyes using her sleeves. Imogen noticed that Fionas' eyes were tearing up so she wiped her tears with the sleeves as well.
"Promise me that you won't do that again and that if you ever feel like you're going to, to talk to me first," Fiona said seriously.
"I promise," Imogen said.
"Good, now about that bag of yours that you brought in here. What's that all about?" Fiona said a little less seriously.
"I did say that I wasn't ready to live with Natalie full time, so I was wondering if maybe I could live with you when I'm not with Natalie," Imogen said perking up her mood a little bit.
"I could never say no to someone like you," Fiona said even though she was surprised that Imogen was ready to take a step like that.
Imogen leaned in and kissed Fiona gently before taking her hand and leading her to the bedroom picking up her bag on the way in.
Imogen got into her pajamas while Fiona did the same in the other room. Imogen finished first and instead of trying to sneak up on Fiona like the day before she just crawled into bed. Fiona came in a couple minutes later and joined Imogen in the bed under all the blankets. They snuggled up to each other and kissed good night and soon were both fast asleep.