Hello there. After four or so years on break, I'm publishing another story. There are plenty of manga spoilers in this story, so if any of you are not caught up with canon, well too bad for you.
For those of you following my other story the Love Hina fic Closet Weirdo, progress is still stalled on that one. For that, I apologize. Hopefully, the wagon will get unstuck from the rut someday.
Well, enjoy my newest project:
A Kumo Nin's Guide to Konoha
I: Kyubi's Rampage
Life has been hectic lately for the Namikaze Minato. It has been eighteen months since the complete and total victory against the joint forces of Iwa and Suna, and being named Yondaime Hokage after the peace negotiations.
Despite this, war has not yet ended for Konoha: Hostilities still continued with Kumo to the northeast. Lead by the elderly Nidaime Raikage, Kumo had adopted a hit-and-run raider approach to their war against Konoha—they would infiltrate Hi no Kuni and destroy storehouses, rice fields, and anything of value, before retreating back to the safety of the mountain defenses of Kaminari no Kuni. This infuriated the Konoha leaders to no end, yet they realize that surrendering was not an option for Kumo when it was winning a war that their allies lost.
However, there were more pressing matters for Minato to deal with at home in Konoha. His wife, Uzumaki Kushina, was eight and a half months pregnant, and was about to give birth to their first son anytime now. It would be normal for any father-to-be to be nervous about the birth of their fist child, but Kushina's case had a unique circumstance that would endanger Konoha itself: She was the Kyubi Jinchuriki.
Hailing from the sealing techniques of the Uzumaki Clan, the seal holding the Kyubi no Yoko inside Kushina was perhaps the best that any mortal could produce in this earth. This seal, however, had one fundamental flaw—it is greatly weakened during childbirth, or upon the death of the Jinchuriki. Because of the risk of releasing Kyubi during this critical time, Minato has arranged for the childbirth to take place outside the walls of Konoha on October 10th, to be presided by Sarutobi Biwako, the wife of the Sandaime Hokage.
However, two days before the fateful day (as if Minato were not busy enough), two Kumo-nin suddenly arrived without warning at the gates of Konoha, apparently on a diplomatic mission to negotiate the terms of peace. And Kumo has sent their best ninja for this mission: The sons of the late Sandaime Raikage, Ei, and the Hachibi Jinchuriki, Killer Bee.
"Hokage-sama! We have Kumo-nin at the gates!"
The poor choice of words by the chunin sentry caused Minato to quickly spring into action from his paperwork and activating his Hiraishin that's infamous throughout Suna and Iwa. Quickly reappearing at the village gates, he quickly spotted the two hulking Kumo-nin and immediately launched a tri-pronged kunai at the bigger fellow. Realizing that he was being attacked, Ei activated his raiton armour and barely dodged the Hokage's punch. Infuriated by the recent turn of events, Ei quickly called out to Minato before things got worse.
"Namikaze! Is this the way Konoha treats emissaries from other villages? We came to discuss peace, yet you wish to continue the war?"
Minato quickly scanned the two Kumo-nin and quickly realized who they were. Ei, with his raiton armour activated, rumoured to posses speed rivaling his Hiraishin. If their brief encounter said anything, those rumours were not completely unfounded. Yet even more disturbing for his is Ei's companion and his younger brother, the proud Jinchuriki of Hachibi no Kyogyu, Killer Bee. Bee was said to possess near-perfect control of the beast inside him, a feat only accomplished by Uchiha Madara, Senju Hashirama, and the current Mizukage. And due to Minato's 'greeting', Bee now has the Bijuu Chakra Cloak around him, ready to fight at moment's notice.
"Bee," said Ei in a controlled and firm manner, "stand down."
"But bro, that dude attacked us, yo! His attack was an abomination; a disgrace to all nations!"
"Bee, even though Konoha wants to continue this war, we did not come all the way here to pick a fight."
Minato watched as the Hachibi Jinchuriki complied with his brother's orders. He should reprimand that chunin for causing an embarrassing diplomatic incident against Konoha. But now, he had, not one, but two urgent matters to attend to. He knew this would further lower their bargaining power, but he had to somewhat convince the brothers to postpone negotiations for about a week.
"You said you are here to negotiate," said Minato to Ei. "Let me assemble my advisors to inform them of your arrival. Until then, you are free to move around Konoha under escort."
Minato turned around and walked back into the village, with Ei and Bee behind him. Hopefully, the next few hours will help cool the Kumo-nin down and give them the week to forget about what just happened.
"Here are our terms of peace."
Ei handed Minato an envelope bearing a seal with the Kumo insignia on it. Minato unsealed the envelope, and together with Sarutobi Hiruzen (the retired Sandaime Hokage) and Uchiha Kagami, read its contents. Minato really wished he wasn't here right now. But Sarutobi and Uchiha insisted that the quicker they can get this peace negotiations over with, the more they can concentrate on Kushina's childbirth. Soon enough, the three Konoha leaders frown as they browsed through its brief contents.
"Shimo no Kuni (Frost Country) to Kaminari no Kuni. War indemnities totaling 500,000 ryou to Kumo. We won the war your coalition! Do you really think the people of Konoha will accept this?"
"Correction, Hokage: You won against Iwa and Suna. You haven't won against us yet. As a matter of fact, we currently hold the advantage."
Ei realized that Konoha, or more specifically, the leadership, seemed to be distracted by something else. He couldn't quite put his finger on it, but hopefully, he could seize this opportunity to stick to what he thought were paltry demands by the Nidaime Raikage. Perhaps, he wouldn't even need to threaten Konoha to have Bee reek havoc in the village in full Hachibi mode. But for now, he would press his advantage.
After a tense silence, the Sandaime Hokage spoke up: "Honourable Emissaries from Kumo, if you will, please give us a week to think about this offer. Until then, feel free to enjoy the amenities Konoha has to offer."
"And why should we delay this for a week? Weren't you so quick to try and finish this an hour ago?"
Minato, Hiruzen, and Kagami looked at each other. Kushina's childbirth was supposed to be an S-ranked secret. Heck, even Kushina's status as the Kyubi Jinchiriki is an S-ranked secret, unknown even to most of Konoha's shinobi. And they can't really make some crap up, since Kumo will quickly investigate whether their excuse was a lie or not.
Reluctantly, the Yondaime Hokage began to speak: "Ei-dono, my wife is pregnant, and is about to give birth in two days."
"Wife? What sort of fools do you take us for? You don't have a wife!"
"This was supposed to be an S-ranked secret to protect her from Iwa, but I guess the word is out now."
"Then who is this wife that you speak of?"
"Uzumaki Kushina."
Uzumaki Kushina. Ei quickly recognized that name from his time browsing Kumo's Mission Archives. One of the last two people known to belong from the Uzumaki Clan. Because of the clan's special chakra, the Nidaime Raikage wanted her in Kumo to become the next Nibi Jinchuriki, going as far as trying to kidnap her. To top things off, the person who foiled the Nidaime's plans was the man before him currently pleading his case for a reprieve.
Kumo was at a great advantage here. Not only were they ransacking Hi No Kuni's economic infrastructure, but now, they are now in possession of two pieces of information to blackmail Konoha with, namely the wife, and the future child of the Yondaime Hokage. And Konoha is well aware that Kumo is not known to keep any secrets. Ei and Bee had to admit that they are enjoying seeing the Hokage squirm before them being caught unaware.
"We may consider ourselves bastards, but we are not heartless bastards." Ei stated, with a smirk clearly forming in his face. "So be it, Hokage. Be with your wife. You have your week."
Minato was about to thank Ei for the break, when the Kumo-nin cut him off.
"And remember that anything said during the negotiations will be relayed back to Kumo."
And with those parting words, Ei and Bee left the room, escorted by half a dozen Konoha ANBU.
"Bro! If you're so bored, why not hire a ho, and get her gored?"
Ei sighed as Bee once again tried to rap his way out of boredom. Indeed, they had nothing better to do for the night. It has been two days since the negotiations were recessed for the week, and they've done all the sightseeing and eating in the local joints as much as they were allowed. But what's getting to him right now was not the pause in negotiations, but the unceasing rapping that his brother has been subjecting him to ever since Bee was a kid. And his latest suggestion was quite ridiculous, if not borderline treacherous.
"Bee, were I to hire a whore, then I may as well go to the Hokage office and make a public donation of my DNA. The last thing that we want is for Konoha to gain a new lineage due to our carelessness. Besides, this is as good a time as any to gather intelligence about this village"
"But bro, what are we to do for a week, while the Konoha ANBU on us peek?"
Ei sighed, as he repeats, "Didn't you hear me the first time? I said, we'll gather as much information on Konoha as they would allow."
"But why agree to the recess, so that Namikaze can attend to his princess?"
"Bee, I have to admit that I have a soft spot for someone in his position. Mum wasn't exactly in prime childbearing age anymore when she had you, you know? Heck, I was already jounin when you were born. My point is, even dad had to take time off from his duties just to attend to your birth. I guess Namikaze deserves the same sort of dignity for someone in that situation."
"Oh, I see," Bee said, wondering what could have been had their father done something different.
As the brothers ponder silently about their late parents, a sudden crash and flash of chakra interrupted their thoughts. The chakra, originating from just inside the village walls, was both strange, yet somewhat familiar to the Kumo duo. Though they knew not exactly the creature the chakra came from, they knew what type of creature the chakra originated from.
"What the heck!" Ei exclaimed. "We're being attacked by a bijuu at this time?"
Bee further elaborated, "Kyubi. Hachibi tells me it's Kyubi."
Why the heck would Kyubi attack now out of all times? As far as the brothers from the Yotsuki clan knew, the last time anyone heard of the beast was at a battle between Senju Hashirama and Uchiha Madara a long time ago. No one else knew what happened to it afterwards. Did they somehow beat the odds, and have the beast make its reappearance now out of all times? Or had someone in Iwa, Suna, or Kiri somewhat gotten a hold of the demon and attacked them during the negotiations and take out two birds with one stone? Either way, things weren't looking good for both Konoha and the delegates from Kumo.
"I can say that the Hokage is not in an enviable position right now." Yup, the Hokage is quite screwed right now, as if the stars aligned themselves to spite him. First, his wife was giving birth. Then, they arrived. Finally, he has to deal with this attack.
Even though they weren't in Kumo, it only took a second for Ei to make a decision: "Bee, try and stall the Kyubi for now while I go and find Namikaze."
With that, the two left the ryokan they were staying in as they head to their respective places.
Things were frantic in Konoha Hospital. With a lot of people dead, and many more injured due to the first attack, the medic-nin were scrambling and running around to tend to those who needed immediate treatment. Most of the wounds they've seen were quite horrific and were never before seen during their entire careers as shinobi: Chakra burns. But this is not chakra burns in the sense of someone overexerting themselves, nor even burns resulting from a katon jutsu from the Uchiha clan. There burns were corrosive, affecting even a few of the medics giving treatment, until all of the demonic chakra eventually dissipated.
At the nursery, a female medic just received the call to report to the emergency ward. It seemed that the hospital needed all the hands that they could get. As the medic neared the stairwell, the wall beside her suddenly burst open, knocking her down and nearly being hit by debris. As her eyes focused on what had caused the damage, it revealed a gigantic, imposing, dark-skinned man before her.
"Medic," Ei commanded, "where is the Hokage?"
"I-I-I d-don't know…" answered the medic as she laid down in fear before him.
"What do you mean you don't know? This is the nursery, right?"
"Y-Y-Yes.."
"And the Hokage and his wife are about to have their first child. Now tell me where Namikaze is!"
"W-W-What do you mean h-his wife," the medic answered fearfully and confused, "N-N-Namikaze-sama isn't married…"
"Don't you dare play games with me!" Ei exclaimed as he picked the medic up by the collar of her shirt, putting them face to face with each other. "Do you realize what's going on outside? Now tell me, where is Namikaze?"
The medic replied as she began sobbing, "I-I r-really don't know. H-He isn't in the hospital. I'd tell you where he is if I knew…"
Ei stared at the medic eye to eye. She wasn't lying. She was probably more clueless on what's happening around Konoha than he was.
In the end, the eldest son of the Sandaime Raikage threw the medic back on the floor, unhappy by the lack of progress he was having in this crisis. As he turned back to the hole in the wall he created and headed for the battlefield, he muttered out his frustrations.
"Damn you, Konoha. What sort of fools do you take everyone for?"
"Keep the demon out of the village until Yondaime-sama gets here!"
The ragtag group of Konoha's elite had just successfully pushed Kyubi outside the village walls. However, this progress already came at too dear a cost. Umino-san was dead, along with countless chunin who were unfortunate enough to be guarding the wall the Kyubi went through. Shimura Danzo and Uchiha Kagami were critically injured, and both elders had to be rushed to the hospital. The remainder of those still fit to fight stood at the ruins of the wall, lead by the elders Sarutobi Hiruzen, Akimichi Torifu, Utatane Koharu, and Mitokado Homura.
"Minato, what could possibly hold you back at a time like this?" Hiruzen wondered. "I know things went terribly wrong with the labour, but I sure hope you're still alive."
All of a sudden, the Third Hokage's thoughts were interrupted as another gigantic creature appeared in the forest outside Konoha. This beast, rivaling the size of the Kyubi, had the head and torso of a bull, and the lower limbs of an octopus. And from the looks of it, he's facing off against the Kyubi. Unfortunately, the group feared the worst.
"I can't freaking believe it," exclaimed Nara Shikaku in exasperation. "We have to deal with another demon, as if one is not enough?"
Sarutobi interjected before panic completely unraveled the group, "That is the Hachibi of Kumo, and it looks like he's fighting Kyubi. It looks like we'll be getting some help from Kumo…for now."
As the Konoha shinobi try to calm themselves down watching this titanic clash of the demons, Killer Bee in his full demonic form issues a battle cry before the demon in front of him:
"Kyubi no Yoko, Hachibi and I are going to kick your ass!"
The Hachibi form suddenly spouted a jet of ink from its underside, propelling itself towards Kyubi at high speed and soaking the surrounding forest and shinobi with ink. As Bee prepared to gore the Kyubi with Hachibi's horns, the nimble nine-tailed fox stepped aside to dodge the attack…or so it thought.
"LARIAT!"
With his right arm outstretched, Bee managed to clothesline Kyubi at the neck, sending both giants a couple of hundred of metres more away from Konoha. Normally, such a devastating attack would literally gut any person unfortunate enough to be at the receiving end of it. However, the Kyubi is a demon. And for it, Bee's attack was merely a blow to its body (albeit, a heavy blow).
As Sarutobi and his group watched the two giants wrestle each other, the other Kumo-nin appeared besides the Sandaime Hokage.
"Sarutobi-dono, how goes Bee?"
"It looks like your brother's faring well against Kyubi. I must say I'm glad you've decided to come to our aid."
"AAARRRGGGHHH! YOU JUST FREAKING BIT ONE OF MY TENTACLES! LET'S SEE IF YOU LIKE THIS!" Bee then retaliated by biting one of Kyubi's tails, causing it to roar out in pain.
"Sarutobi-dono, it looks like Bee can't win this fight alone," Ei said, while looking at the struggles his brother was having, "I need you to tell me where the Hokage is!"
"Something must have gone terribly with Kushina's labour for all this to happen. I'm not even sure if Minato is alright at this point."
An incredulous Ei asked Sarutobi, "What does the birth of Namikaze's child have to do with this attack?"
"WHAT THE FREAKING HELL, KYUBI! YOU JUST KICKED ME IN THE GROIN! Wait, Hachibi, you have a groin?"
"I can't believe I'm doing this again," Ei muttered, as he decided to join the fray and try to seal Kyubi himself. It has been a long time since he last participated in a mission to seal a rampaging bijuu, namely the Nibi no Nekomata, fifteen or so years ago. Before that, the Hachibi rampaged around Kumo numerous times until it was finally sealed into his brother, Bee. He thought those days were long behind him…until this came along. His skills may be rusty, and he's probably biting off more than he could chew (since he had never sealed a beast greater than Eight Tails before), but he was left with no other choice at the moment.
"Sarutobi-dono, go find the Hokage," as Ei begain to order. "You, you, and you," pointing to the Ino-Shika-Cho, "I need the largest sake barrel you can find, the longest chain available, and every sealing parchment in this village!"
"Who the hell are you to order us, Kumo scum!" A Konoha ANBU exclaimed, "Until the treaty is signed, you are our enemies!"
"Have any of you guys fought a tailed beast before?" Ei roared in anger. "As far as I know, I'm the only person within two days' travel to have ever sealed a rampaging bijuu, so quit whining!"
"Sandaime-sama, the Kyubi…" Inoshi stammered fearfully as the pointed to the fighting beasts.
Having momentarily freed itself from Killer Bee, a dark ball of demonic chakra slowly formed at its mouth, gathering energy as it grew bigger. As the beast prepared to release this ball, Ei whispered to himself in resignation:
"Bijuudama: We're screwed."
"OH NO YOU DON'T, KYUBI!"
One of Hachibi's tentacles suddenly wrapped itself around Kyubi's mouth, dissipating the Bijuudama for the time being. Kyubi countered with a reverse headbutt on the Hachibi figure's face, though Bee kept the Kyubi's muzzle tightly shut in an effort to prevent the fox from forming and releasing a bijuu's ultimate jutsu. Ei and Sarutobi looked at each other during this reprieve.
"What the hell are you waiting for?" Sarutobi yelled at the group. "Go get everything that Ei-dono needs! Now!"
At that moment four shinobi took off, with the Ino-Shika-Cho gathering Ei's request, while Sarutobi heading to the secret place where Kushina was giving birth to her child.
"Minato, I don't have much longer to live. Please, let me do this."
The Fourth Hokage painfully looked at his dying wife, while cradling their newborn baby in his arms. He couldn't believe that Kushina would soon be gone. Everything was going well for a while, from the maintenance of the seal, to the childbirth itself. However, everything changed when an intruder killed every guard and medic around, even the wife of the Third Hokage. The intruder even took his son, Naruto, as ransom, forcing him to choose between his wife and his son.
In a moment of what many would say as a major lapse in judgment, he chose his son over his wife, the Kyubi Jinchuriki. He chose his legacy over the safety of the village. By the time he got back to his wife, it was too late: The Kyubi was released, and he now had to fight the intruder whom he thought was long dead—Uchiha Madara.
He wanted to fight the rampaging Kyubi, but he knew that Madara was the greater threat to Konoha. The fight took a good hour until Minato managed to wound Madara critically, forcing him to retreat. By the time the family was reunited, the couple had only one thing in mind: Sealing the Kyubi into Naruto.
But Kushina was dying, mortally weakened by the unsealing of the bijuu. As her final act, she would seal the demon inside their son, Naruto. But it pained Minato to see the woman he loved die like this before him.
"Kushina, you cannot die like this." Minato said in denial. "You're the one who taught me fuinjutsu. You are the person who made me Hokage."
"Minato, we don't have much time," Kushina said as she laboured with every breath she took. "I have to start the jutsu now…"
Minato handed Naruto over to her, as Kushina began the jutsu that would seal Kyubi into the infant. However, Minato realized one thing: Kushina was already too weak to have enough chakra to execute the sealing alone. And it seemed that his wife realized the same thing. This left him with one other choice—a choice that would leave their son an orphan on his very first hours of life. As Kushina finished her part, Minato took their son to face his fate.
"Kushina, I'd have to supplement your jutsu with Shiki Fujin. Your chakra cannot complete the sealing alone, so hopefully, the Shinigami can take some of Kyubi's chakra for the sealing to finish properly. Please forgive me for leaving Naruto without his parents."
Kushina was about to respond when someone interrupted them.
"Minato-kun, are you really thinking of sacrificing yourself and leaving your son alone?"
The couple turned to see the source of the voice, and saw the Sandaime Hokage, obviously winded from the quick trip from the battleground to this place.
"Minato, what the hell happened here?"
"Uchiha Madara attacked us."
This was shocking news for Sarutobi—Uchiha Madara was still alive. After the fight at the Valley of the End, no one could confirm the whereabouts of the rogue Uchiha. Not even his body could be found. There was always a small possibility that he survived the fight, and was still alive somewhere. (After all, the current Tsuchikage, who was said to have fought Madara, was still alive and actively ruling Iwa under his guidance.) This event merely confirmed this. This would explain why Kyubi was extracted. This would also explain why Minato was absent in the village while Kyubi was rampaging.
"Sarutobi-sama," Minato stated, "I want you to make sure that Naruto will be seen as a hero."
The night had been tragic for all of Konoha. But Sarutobi now had the opportunity to prevent one more tragedy from happening.
"Minato-kun, the village needs you. You don't have to do this. Besides, Ei-dono already has a plan set up to seal the Kyubi."
"What?"
"Minato, wait!" Sarutobi cried out in vain as Minato disappeared along with his son in a bright, yellow flash, presumably to the battlefield.
Hiruzen can only hope that the Kumo-nin can beat Minato and save him. In the meantime, all he could do now was tend to the dying wife of the Fourth Hokage and give her comfort in her final minutes.
Minato appeared on the village gate with his son in his arms, and he was not too thrilled by what he saw.
The Hachibi jinchuriki, in his full bijuu form, was holding down the nine tails of Kyubi no Yoko. The Kyubi itself was bound in long chains tagged with seals running along it. Ei himself was nowhere to be seen, but he had to be somewhere in the vicinity for the Kyubi to be bound like that.
Kumo cannot have the Kyubi—they already have two of the biju with them. And they can't seal the Kyubi right now—Kushina's jutsu was time-sensitive, and could only be executed within a few minutes judging from the amount of chakra left in his wife.
The two giants were too far away from the gate for Minato to throw his tri-pronged kunai and teleport with. Thus, he bit his thumb to let it bleed, performed several hand seals, and executed the jutsu.
"Kuchiyose no Jutsu!"
Minato and his infant son found themselves on top of a giant frog wearing a yakuza outfit with a gigantic knife on its side. The shinobi of Konoha cheered at the appearance of the frog, for it only meant that the Yondaime Hokage has arrived. The frog looked at the battlefield, and saw the ushi-oni holding down the kitsune.
"Minato," the frog asked, "what the hell is going on here?"
"Bunta, time is of the essence! You have to get us there quic-"
Minato never got to finish his sentence. A bright flash of light shone in the night sky, emanating from where the two gigantic beasts were. The form of the Kyubi suddenly became deformed, as it was sucked into some sort of vessel in the forest floor. After the said deed was done, a powerful shockwave shook the immediate area, casing the frog summon to dispel itself and forcing Minato to right himself up in a city street inside the village walls to prevent injuring himself and Naruto.
This was not happening. This was not the way things were supposed to be! Minato kept repeating these denials to himself as he made his way towards the receding form of the Hachibi to meet with the Kumo-nin.