I hope you like it. :D Thanks for reading (in advance).
It was one fine morning when Brittany got stuck in the traffic. She was on her way to Lima, Ohio to celebrate the foundation day of William McKinley High School - her Alma Mater. She's changed a lot and by a lot means, well, yes a LOT. It's like a 360 degree turn for her. She went from being sweet and hilarious Brittany to a serious, intelligent and alluring dancer. She's now a well-known and kick-ass choreographer. After Santana and Brittany broke up everything changed in her life. She stopped believing in relationships and love. Love for her is a stupid and dumbest thing. We couldn't blame her. After all, she has her heart broken by her one true love.
She arrived at the place she once called home. The ever supportive parents of hers welcomed her. She didn't acknowledge them much though. She went straight to her room that now looks like a foreign place. It was plain. The unicorn posters and some of the photos were ripped off of the wall. White linens replaced the colorful ones she has. She scanned the room and went to lie on the bed. She didn't bother to unpack. The Pierce's residence is just like any other place for her. It's not a home, not a house, just a place where she chooses to stay in for a couple of days. Her dad knocks on her door for a couple of times but she ignored him. She pretended to be asleep. She can't be bothered. She can't even remember the last time she had talked to them. She speaks to them, but she never talked the way she used to.
"Quinn went by... she's asking for you. She said that she'll come back some other time." His dad said and left.
Santana was so nervous about this upcoming celebration. She's one of the richest alumnae of their batch. She funded and backed up the glee club which has undergone a series of downfall five years ago. She decided to help the glee club that has once been a home for her. That's the least she can do. That's the only thing she's been holding on to all these years. She's not yet ready to give up the club because of it has been a great part of her. It reminded her of how she used to sit at the back of the class linking her pinkie with the person she once loved. Santana decided not to come anymore. She doesn't know if she's ready. But something inside of her wanted to take this chance... this only chance to see her again. So she took the first flight early this morning to go back to Lima. She arrived before noon at their house and was welcome by her mother. Her dad passed away a couple of years back because of heart attack. She refused to go back to work after that. But her mom insisted her to go on with her life.
"Quinn's back... she went here a couple of days to check on me. She asked if you're coming home too." Her mom told her. Santana and her mom are sitting on their backyard watching the sun setting from afar.
"Did you tell her?" Santana asked without looking at her mom.
"I did. I told her that you're coming home. Is there any problem?"
"No... not at all." Santana shrugged. "Is she the only one who went here?"
"Yes, dear." Her mother answered. She knows that Santana is expecting for the other blond to come by. She's still wondering why they haven't end up together. Yes, she was quite disappointed at Santana for becoming a lesbian but she came around when she saw how happy her daughter was. Brittany has been a good girl friend to her. She can attest to that.
Santana refused to talk about Brittany after their breakup. Maribel Lopez didn't push her daughter to tell her though. Instead, she just let her daughter to cope up with her own. Most nights she heard Santana crying after the breakup. It pained her to see her daughter like that.
Her husband, on the other hand, knew everything. Dr. Lopez is the most generous and respected man in Lima. He wanted her daughter to be as perfect as he imagined her to be. When Santana came out of the closet, he refused to look at her daughter for months. He drowned himself in alcohol but he never spoke badly about her daughter. As a parent he continued to do what he is ought to do. To feed her, give her a shelter and send her to school. When Santana graduated from WMHS she was sent to study in London. It's so far away from Lima, Ohio. Her dad never allowed her to go back home... not until she finished her studies. She became a doctor too, just like her father had wanted her to be.
"Are you going to be okay? The foundation day is still a week away." Her mom told her after a long silence. The sun finally bids its farewell. But they are still seated outside. It's getting darker and colder.
"Yes mami. I think I need this break." She drank the tea that her mom prepared. The cup she's holding is now empty.
"I'm going to prepare dinner. Do you want to head inside?"
"I'd like to stay here for a few more minutes." She responded. Her mom collected the cup from her and went inside the house. The inside of the house came to life after her mom turned on some of the lights.
Santana grabbed something out of her back pocket. She started playing the lighter in her hands. She closed her eyes feeling the cold breeze of Ohio...
"Santana..." she heard a voice coming from the fence. She opened her eyes and saw Brittany climbing up.
She stood up to help the blonde girl.
"Are you crazy?" Santana laughed with her. "Why didn't you just come by the house? It's dangerous to climb up those fences! It has barb wires hidden on the plants!"
"Well, it's more exciting. It makes my way to you more romantic, don't you think?" Brittany chuckled as they went up to the tree house placed behind the Lopez's house.
"You're such a dork."
"Hey! I did it for you." Brittany sat on the cushion placed in the tree house. It's cosy inside.
"Well, thank you. It's really romantic." Santana kissed Brittany's pout away. She pecked her lips a few times before lighting the candle placed on an oak table.
Brittany scrunched her brows.
"Hm, breathe on me..." Brittany told her.
"W-what?"
"Breathe on me... Say 'HA'." Brittany adamantly asked her.
"Haaaa." Santana obliged and Brittany sniffed her breath.
"You haven't smoke today, right?"
"Britt, I told you... I quit smoking a long time ago."
"Are you sure?"
"Of course I am! Don't you trust me?" Santana said agitatedly.
"I do... of course. You're my girl friend. Tomorrow will be our third anniversary. I think we couldn't last that long if I don't trust you." She crawled on top of Santana who is now lying on a comforter across the small room.
"Then, why do you have to ask?" Santana felt a pang of disappointment.
"I'm curious. You still have that lighter with you." Brittany explained as she rested her head on Santana's chest.
"Well, it's for times like this y'know?" Santana sighed.
"Okay... okay... I'm sorry. I just don't want you smoking. It's bad and I won't tolerate it. I'm your girl friend and it's my job to take care of you."
Santana melted at her words. She kissed Brittany and she gladly reciprocated it. It's times like that that they felt contented. Nobody else around them matters as long as they are together.
6am
Brittany woke up to the smell of fresh brewed coffee and bacon. She knew that she have to get up sooner or else her parents would come and start a conversation with her. She slowly got up and stretched. She opened her luggage to get a tank top and yoga pants. When she's done tying the knot of her running shoes she walked out of the house and started her early run.
She slowed down once she was about to reach a very familiar street. She finally stopped on a corner near her past lover's house. She tried to peek through the fences surrounding the Lopez's residence.
Santana is not a morning person but whenever she's Ohio she always wakes up early. Not because of the familiar feeling of home but because of the terrifying nightmares she always had whenever she's back. She had a cup on her hand and a book that she had read a thousand times. She's not wearing her contact lenses today. There is no need. Instead, she wears her glasses. Her hair is tied up in a messy bun. She's sitting comfortably on the porch as the sun rises up. She's not aware that she's being watched by a particular blonde.
Brittany has her eyes on Santana, watching her every move. She felt uncomfortable from where she's standing at. So she decided to go home. Instead of passing by Santana's house she went the other way around.
10am
The next day all the alumni received a message from the new Principal of WMHS. They are invited for a pre-conference which will be held in the auditorium. The number of strange faces flooded the hallway of McKinley. Nothing much changed inside the school aside from the paints and some banners. Brittany stopped by in front of the cheerios locker room. Good thing it was empty inside. She sat on one of the benches there. She was not alone, that's what she realized a few minutes later. From the other side of the locker Quinn stood there. She's in deep thought. Brittany made her way beside Quinn. Quinn took notice of her. They exchanged smiles along with the comfortable silence they had.
"It's been a while, Quinn." Brittany said.
"Yeah, a very long while..."
"I saw her yesterday." Brittany said.
"Are you okay?" Quinn asked without looking at her.
They decided to sit beside each other. Each of them maintains a decent space from each other.
"Of course." She replied confidently.
"Well, it's a good thing right?"
"Yes it is, Quinn."
"So how are you? I've heard how successful you are now." Quinn looked at her for the first time. She's wearing a gray sweater and faded jeans.
"News really travels that far huh?" Brittany shrugged.
"Well, New York is not that far from Philadelphia, you know?"
"So you work there?"
"Nope." Quinn shook her head.
"So, where do you work then?"
"New York..."
Brittany looked at her peculiarly.
"Berry's in New York too. She's made a big name in Broadway. The least I can do is to be with her once in a while. But we live in Philadelphia..."
"How come I haven't seen you there?"
"You're too busy, I guess?" Quinn chuckled.
"Oh..." Brittany said. Her mouth is in a perfect 'O'.
Quinn's phone interrupted them.
"Hey..." she answered. Brittany can hear loud voices of kids.
"Your mom is not here yet... Mhm, yes... I heard you loud and clear." Quinn nodded her head. "Okay, okay. I'll tell your mom to call you back later. Well, take care of each other. I love you too... both of you." Quinn ended the call. "Sorry about that."
Brittany is lost in her own little world.
"It's fine... Are they your kids?"
"Yes, mine and Rachel's." Quinn smiled.
"So, you and Rachel huh?"
"Mhm, hard to believe right?"
"No, not really." Brittany shrugged. "I know there's something going on between the two of you back then. So, how many kids do you have?"
"We have two. I carried the first one, his name is Bradley. Rach carried our last, Lucy Barbra."
"Wait... seriously? You named her after your first name and Rachel's second name? That's just so... cruel." Brittany sighed exasperatingly.
"Shut up! You'd love her when you meet her. She's turning two this year."
"Oh, and how about your eldest? How old is he?"
"He's four years old."
"Hm, time flies..." Brittany trailed off. "Where is your wife by the way?"
"We're not married." Quinn said sadly. "Not yet... we're just too busy you know?"
"Yet you decided to make two babies? Whoa!"
"Hm, it's all my idea. I thought when we had Brad and Lucy we'd settle down. But I was wrong." Quinn faked a smile. Brittany can see through Quinn. She knows that she's lonely. "Anyways, she's on her way here to McKinley. She dropped by their house to visit her dads."
Brittany only nodded.
"So, how about you?" Quinn asked after a long pause.
Brittany raised her left hand and showed it to Quinn.
"Not married. I'm single and yet to remain for the rest of my life."
"Don't be so sure about that." Quinn said.
"Relationships are stupid Quinn." She sounded aggressive. "It's not for me. I'm overqualified to be someone else's girl friend."
Quinn can now see how her best friend changed. After they wrapped up their conversation they decided to make their way to the auditorium. Quinn saw Santana talking animatedly to one of the teachers. Brittany stopped on her tracks. Santana made her way to her best friends.
"Quinn!" Santana squealed. "How are you?" She hugged her tightly.
"I'm good. I went to your house the other day."
"Yeah, mami told me."
"When did you arrive?" Quinn asked her.
"Yesterday." Santana and Quinn smiled at each other. Santana took notice of Brittany.
"Hey, Britt." She greeted her.
"How come she gets a hug while I get none?" Brittany said. "So, exes are not entitled for a hug?" Brittany raised her eyebrow at Santana. Santana was about to hug her but she resumed walking towards the auditorium.
"Come on, San." Quinn told her.
Brittany ignored Santana and Quinn throughout the pre-conference.
"I'm just wasting my time in here." Brittany stood up but Santana held his legs up to block Brittany.
"Where do you think you're going, Pierce?"
"In hell... out of my way, Lopez."
"Oh, mind if I join you?"
"Santana, just... let it go." Quinn whispered to avoid any commotion. Santana slowly put her legs down.
"Thank you." Brittany said sarcastically.
It was announced that the former members of the New Directions are to present and revive some of their numbers they've performed in the past. Mr. Shue who came back called in a meeting for all the former glee club members. They are back in the choir room.
"Well, well. It's nice to be back." He greeted them.
"Not for me..." Brittany commented on the corner of the room.
Mercedes, Puck, Kurt, Blaine, Sam, Artie, Mike and Tina are all seated in their old seats. While Brittany, Quinn and Santana sat in different orders. Rachel is now sitting beside Quinn. Some of the other members didn't make it.
"Then why are you here exactly?" Santana snapped at her. Quinn shot her a warning glare.
"Girls... come on now. We are here to celebrate the foundation of our school. We are here to reminisce the past and relive the experiences we once shared as a family. We will do it one last time." Mr. Shue explained what had been announced in the auditorium. They had to create a set list of their songs and practice for the few days that is left.
"So this is your assignment," He scribbled something on the white board. He wrote 'PAST' all in capital letters. "I want you think of something that you'd like to remake or perform again... even as an individual, group or pair. But, we need to have a performance as a group so we'll talk about that tomorrow. I'll see you here at nine. No one should come in late. No excuses. Again, nine a.m. sharp."
The former glee club members are once again gathered in the choir room. They gave numerous suggestions of songs for the set list.
"Mr. Shue, how about we open and end it with a group performance?" Mercedes suggested.
"That's a-" Mr. Shue started but he was cut off by Rachel.
"Great idea, Cedes... I already thought about that last night and I came up with this set list." Rachel stood holding a paper in her hands.
"Hold up, hobbit! Can you let Mr. Shue finish just this once?" Santana rolled her eyes at Rachel. Rachel was a bit taken aback as usual.
"Thank you, Santana..." Mr. Shue cleared his throat. "Rachel, may I see the set list please?"
Rachel stood up and gave it to Mr. Shue. He scanned it while nodding his head. "Thank you for this, Rachel. I think it's wonderful though we have to make a few adjustments."
"Oh, that is totally fine with me Mr. Shue. In fact we can ask their help for suggestions."
"Okay. Let me read to you what is listed here... Hm, Raise Your Glass, The Climb, Firework, Defying Gravity..."
"Whoa! Whoa! It's like the list is made just for her. We're a team in here Mr. Shue. It will be better if the set list will be divided fairly!" Mercedes commented.
"I agree with, Cedes. Why don't we just give our own suggestions so that it would be a lot more personal to all of us?" Kurt looked for approval.
"In that way, we can really relate and perform better." Blaine supported his husband. He took Kurt's hand in his and kissed it.
"That's a good idea. Who else agree to that?" Mr. Shue asked and they all raised their hands. "Okay then... I'll leave you for a while to think about what song you want to add in here. But the first four in this set list will be used. So no more song for you Rachel." With that Mr. Shue left the room to run some errands. They all talked to each other and throw left and right suggestions. Tina writes their suggestions on the board.
"How about Seasons of Love?" Mercedes asked and they all nodded in approval. "We can sing it in the opening or ending..."
"I think it would be best if we sing it in the beginning and then let's sing Don't Stop Believin' as the ending song." Blaine suggested.
"Cool. Puck, Sam and I decided to sing No Surrender." Artie said.
"Okay... How about you Quinn?" Tina asked.
"I think I'd like to sing Never Can Say Goodbye..." Quinn said.
"Hm, it's pathetic Quinn." Brittany chimed in. "Well, I'd like to sing Run the World." She smirked. "Write it down, Tina." Tina scribbled it on the board. "How about you Santana? Anything going on in that pretty head of yours?" Brittany pointed to Santana. "I have a suggestion for you... how about you sing 'Mine'? I can still remember that epic performance of yours... it made me believe that you really loved me. That is so bizarre because right after that song you broke up with me."
All of them were silenced by Brittany. Santana was holding back the tears after hearing those words from her past lover. She cleared her throat.
"Hm, I'm sorry to disappoint you but I swore never to do that song ever." Santana sounded aggressive. "I'd to remake..." She walked towards Tina and grabbed the marker from her. She wrote 'VALERIE' on the board.
"Oh, interesting... want me to choreograph it again for you?" Brittany shrugged in her seat.
"Oooookay! That would be wonderful, Brittany." Quinn said. Once again she successfully avoided an inevitable heated conversation.
"Cool. We can start practicing tomorrow." Brittany smirked at Santana.
After an hour they completed the list of songs. Mr. Shue came back with the new musicians the Principal got for them. After lunch break they came back to the choir room and started practicing. Brittany and Mike were the ones who choreograph the songs. They divided them equally so they can finish on time since they only have four days left for their performance.
Brittany invited some of the cheerios to join the performance. She asked them to be the backup dancers. Brittany discreetly flirted in them which made Santana uncomfortable. She sometimes caught herself glaring at Brittany. Brittany would secretly smirk at Santana whenever she feels her staring.
"Perfect!" Mr. Shue commented on Quinn and Puck's performance of Keep Holding On. "Who's next?"
Blaine and Kurt stood in front to sing All of Me. They are all touched seeing those two perform. Well, except for Brittany who is against all the mushy stuffs. Brittany ignored their performance and continued flirting with one of the cheerios. She placed her arm on top of the other girl's shoulder and whispered to her ears. The girls face immediately turned pink. Santana rolled her eyes and tried her best to watch Blaine and Kurt.
During practice Brittany would not-so-accidentally brush her hands on the cheerios ass. Santana felt furious. She doesn't know why but she felt a little offended because Brittany is avoiding her. Sometimes she would throw off some insults to Santana regarding her voice and the way she dances.
"No one's asking for your opinion, Pierce." Puck tried to defend Santana.
"Guys, let's just practice okay?" Artie butted in.
"Let's um... start again." Sam said nonchalantly.
Brittany looked infuriated with Puck.
"Well, Puckerman... who's asking yours?"
"Just shut up and let Santana do her own thing." Puck said.
"Okay. If you really want her to be a laughing stock then go ahead. I'm not going to stop any of you." Brittany crossed her arms defensively.
"Shut uuuuuuuuuuuup!" Santana screamed. She walked towards Brittany and dragged her to the school's parking lot.
"Let go of me!" Brittany whined. Santana let go of her arm angrily when they reached the far end of the parking lot.
"What the hell is the matter with you?" Santana asked.
"What are you talking about?"
"Don't ask like you don't know anything! You know what? I'm so full of all the things you're doing! I've kept my mouth shut for the past few days. You haven't heard anything from me. Not even a single insult! But, you... you never run out of bad things to say about me." She pointed at Brittany. "If this is still about what happened between us, then I'm sorry! I've already told you that for the nth time, Brittany! Why can't you just forgive and let it go?"
"Oh, you think this is still about the past? Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you but this has nothing to do with it. It's nothing personal... I'm just giving my opinion to make your performance better. Now, if you don't want to hear my suggestions then don't listen. But you can't stop me from talking!" Brittany said in a challenging voice.
"Then fine!" Santana shouted and left her.
After another day of practicing, Santana exhaustedly walked towards the parking lot alone. The Principal invited her for a small chat regarding the funds that Santana gave the school. They'd like to acknowledge Santana during the celebration of McKinley's foundation day but Santana refused. She said that she doesn't need any of that. She only wanted to help. The Principal respected her decision.
She was about to enter her car when she saw Brittany at the far end of the parking lot. She narrowed her eyes to get a better view. Brittany is making out with a cheerleader inside her convertible.
"What the fuck?" She whispered to herself. She shook her head and finally decided to enter the car.
Brittany saw Santana left. She clumsily pushed the girl who is kissing her neck furiously.
"Okay. You can stop now!" She said and fixed herself.
"If you really want her that bad why don't you just ask her?" The girl frowned.
"It's not that simple, Anne. It's just-"
"Too complicated?"
"Yes... sort of."
Anne chuckled at her.
"Your sister would kill you if she knows that this happened." Anne reapplied her lipstick.
"Well, nothing happened in here. Besides, you still need my recommendation to enter Juilliard Dance Division right?"
Anne nodded her head.
"Just make sure your best friend will not know any of this."
"Where is your sister by the way? I haven't seen her in practice. Is there a problem?"
"No. She's not feeling well. You should pay her a visit. She's a mess."
"Oh, well. I gotta go... I'll wait for the recommendation." With that Anne left her.
Santana twist and turn all throughout the night. She couldn't get her mind off of what she saw. She came to school without any sleep at all. She feels drained. She couldn't focus on what everybody else around her is saying.
"Lopez, get up. Time for Valerie." Brittany called her. She just finished Run the World choreography. Santana reluctantly stood up from her seat and went closer to Brittany. "Do you remember the basics?" Brittany asked her. She just nodded. "Okay, show me."
The band started playing the intro but Santana missed a note. Brittany asked them to start from the beginning again. Santana missed another lyric of the song. Brittany is getting agitated. "Can you please focus on the song Santana!" Brittany shouted at her. The whole choir room looked at them.
"Sorry." Santana shook her head to focus.
"Okay, hit it again." Brittany impatiently asked the band to start again. Santana started singing and dancing. When she turned around she loses her balance. Brittany catches her on time. She saw how pail Santana is. The sweat coming from Santana's body is so cold. The members gasped and ran immediately towards them.
"Santana, Santana... hey, are you okay?" Brittany repeatedly asked.
All of them gathered around Santana.
"I'll bring her to the clinic." Puck made his way to pick up Santana but Brittany hugged Santana defensively.
"NO!" Puck stopped upon hearing Brittany. "I'll bring her." Brittany picked Santana up and carried her bridal style towards the clinic.
The nurse immediately checked on Santana and unbuttoned her clothe.
"Hey, hey!" Brittany shouted. "Is that necessary?" She asked the nurse.
"It will help her breathe better." The nurse explained. She checked Santana's eyes and blood pressure.
The nurse came back to sit on her desk. "She's just a little stressed. She lacks sleep and haven't eaten yet that's why she collapsed." She told Brittany.
"Can I bring her home?" Brittany asked.
"Yes. But she needs to rest for today. So no more practice for her."
"It's fine." Brittany said.
"Where am I?" Santana mumbled holding her head. After a few seconds she loses her consciousness again.
"That's what I'm talking about." The nurse said. "Take her home and feed her. Make her drink several glasses of water or juice to help her hydration."
Brittany called Quinn to borrow her car since it is bigger than hers. Quinn immediately went to the clinic and talked to her.
"Is she okay?" Quinn asked.
"Yes, she just needs some rest. May I borrow your car?"
"Let me drive you home."
"Okay. Thanks."
Brittany carried Santana to Quinn's car. She gently placed her on the back seat.
"Which house?" Quinn asked.
"Santana's..." Brittany mumbled. She looks so worried about Santana. Her bitchiness seemed to fade when she came back in Ohio. Her old self is returning little by little that's why she's so afraid. She's so afraid that when she come back to her old self all the feelings she pushed away will come back together with it. As well as the memories she tried to forget. But this time she didn't care anymore. Life is about taking risks after all...
"What happened?" Maribel asked Brittany when she went out of Santana's room.
"She collapsed during practice." Brittany said.
"Poor Santanita..." Maribel shook her head as they went downstairs. "Oh, Quinn left a few minutes ago. Rachel needs her."
Brittany only nodded her head.
"Do you want anything to drink? Coffee? Juice?" Maribel offered and smiled at her. They reached the living room. Brittany looked around. Nothing much changed in Santana's house. "Oh, how about your favorite sweet tea?"
Brittany beamed upon hearing it. She nodded her head and smiled shyly at her. When they were still in high school Maribel would always make them sweet tea. She has her own recipe for that. Maribel came back holding a tray. She placed it on the coffee table in front of them. She sat beside Brittany on the couch and gave her the teacup.
"Thanks mama." Brittany said as she excitedly took a sip of the sweet tea.
"You're welcome, doll. I missed hearing you call me that. It's been a long time since you came here."
"Yeah, almost seven years..." Brittany sighed.
"Six years, eight months and twenty four days." Maribel said surprising Brittany. "But who's counting anyways?" She chuckled.
"It's obviously you, mama. Wow, you really record each day and year?"
Maribel shyly nodded her head. "It's just sort of a past time, you know? Then after a few months it has become a part of my routine. Every day I'd put an X mark on the calendar. I kept the old ones."
"Wow." She said in disbelief. "You're really something." Brittany chuckled.
"Of course I am." Maribel jokingly said. "You're not going back to practice doll?"
"Nope." She shook her head. "They can handle it."
Maribel took a sip of her tea and nodded. They held a long silence, each of them having deep thoughts.
"It's getting late..." Brittany said. Neither of them wanted to get up. They missed sitting around like that. Having their private yet lazy moments. Maribel looked at Brittany as her own daughter. That's why it pained her too when they broke up.
"Spend the night with us, doll. Your mama missed you." Maribel looked at the now murky facade of Brittany.
"I missed you too mama. But do you think it's a good idea?"
"Why not?"
"I saw a picture in Santana's desk." She said not directly answering Maribel.
"Which one?" Maribel inquisitively answered. She leaned back on the couch and took a long sip from her teacup.
"Is she married?"
"Oh, that one..." Maribel shook her head. "They are not... I mean, she's not married yet. But it's not my story to tell, doll."
"I understand, ma."
"I know you do." Maribel took Brittany's hand on hers. She squeezed them gently. "Want to start making our dinner with me?"
"Just like the old times?"
"Yes." Maribel nodded. "Just like the old times."
Brittany giddily stood up and practically dragged Maribel to the kitchen.
Santana was awakened by the noise coming downstairs. She slowly opened her eyes trying to figure out where she is. She sat up from the bed and held her head. She still feels a little dizzy. Her stomach is growling at her. She realized that she hadn't eaten anything yet. She learned that she is now in her room. She opened the lamp and slowly got up. She made her way to the bathroom connected to her room. She removed washed her face, brush her hair and removed the contact lenses that is starting to irritate her eyes. She wore her glasses and changed into some comfortable clothes.
Santana went out of her room. She heard familiar voices laughing and chatting downstairs. She found no one in the living room. She followed where the voices are coming from. She slowly opened the door towards their dining room adjacent to it is the kitchen where the noises are coming from.
She stopped on her tracks when she saw Maribel and Brittany.
"Mija!" Maribel called out. She reached for her daughter. "Are you alright?"
"I'm fine mom. Just a little dizzy." She shrugged. She looked at Brittany who is leaning on the kitchen counter facing them. She's holding a glass of wine. She nodded at her.
"Dinner will be ready soon." Maribel announced as she get back to the stove to stir the sauce.
"What are we having tonight?" Santana asked standing awkwardly in front of Brittany. She avoided her piercing blue eyes.
"Spaghetti." Brittany answered for Maribel.
"Hm, okay. I'll set the table."
"I'll help you." Brittany followed Santana when she came to the dining room.
They set the table in silence. Santana wished to ignore Brittany but she knows that she'll start a conversation soon.
"So..." Brittany started. Santana chuckled at herself. "What's so funny?" Brittany scrunched her nose. She looks so cute when she does that.
"Nothing." Santana answered.
"Why? Tell me." Brittany demanded.
"It's nothing... it's just... I know that you cannot endure the silence." Santana chuckled again. She was not expecting that Brittany would join her.
"Well, you know me." Brittany smiled sweetly at her.
"Hm, en efecto." Santana said as they finished setting up the table.
They had a lovely night. Maribel and Brittany seemed to enjoy their conversation. Santana excused herself after a while. She said that she isn't feeling too well. Maribel bid her an early good night.
9pm
Maribel and Brittany decided to call it a night. Maribel insisted to do the dishes. She told Brittany to go up to her room. Brittany didn't know which room she is talking about. Is it Santana's room or the guest room? She decided that it's the latter one because she cannot sleep in Santana's room. She was about to enter the guest room when her feet started to walk to the other room beside it. She hesitated before knocking. She took a deep breath.
"Santana?" She knocked three times. She heard some shuffling inside. The door opened revealing an almost naked Santana. She gulped. Santana is only wearing her tank top and panties. Santana's eyes shut close in realization. She mentally hit her head. Brittany looked into her eyes instead.
"Can we talk?"
Santana nodded and let Brittany inside. She immediately grabbed her pyjama pants and wore it. Brittany looked around Santana's room once again. Santana motioned for her to sit on the bed beside her.
"I'd like to apologize for my behavior in the past few days..."
"No need to say that-"
"I know how childish I am. It's just... seeing you here again brings out a lot of memories. And seeing you here is just too much for me."
"I understand..." Santana nodded her head.
There's another long and dragging pause. Neither of them speak. They have so much to tell but words cannot escape their mouths. They are overwhelmed with the emotions that they are feeling.
"What happened to us?" Brittany asked. She lowered her gaze on her fidgeting hands.
"Life happened."
Brittany nodded in agreement.
"I was willing to give up all for you, Santana. I fought but I was defeated." Brittany explained.
The memories that they buried in the back of their minds seemed to come alive. Both of them are lost in their thoughts.
"I know. That's why it hurts. I didn't want to be unfair, Brittany."
"Then why did you do it? Why did you leave me?" Brittany has a shaky breath.
"I have to do it for you to have a better life!"
"But I didn't have a better life! You know... you know that you are the best for me! You know it, Santana. You know it more than anyone else." Brittany finally set free the tears that were bottled inside her for a very long time. She finally feels vulnerable for the first time in years. "You are my life."
"That's not true!" Santana refused to believe it but deep in her heart she knows that it is true.
"You know it is true. I'm willing to be with you back then. I'm ready to spend the rest of my life with you. You know that I'd take care of you and your baby..." The moment Brittany said it Santana's mind went back to the excruciating memories of her past.
She was on her way home from visiting her abuela who lives on the other end of the town. It was two months before their graduation. Brittany was on Quinn's house practicing for their number at glee club. Her car suddenly broke down. She wanted to call Brittany but the signal of her phone failed her. She looked around. It's getting late. The sun already set and the moon finally made its appearance. She's in the middle of nowhere. There are no houses nearby, any gasoline stations or even stores. She's starting to freak out so she decided to wait on her car. After half an hour she saw a car going in her direction. She went out of her car. She waved her hands to get some attention.
The car stopped. Three college boys wearing varsity jackets came out of the car.
"Is there a problem?" The tallest guy said.
"Yes, my car broke down. I don't know what the problem is... I'm not really familiar with car parts." She explained.
"Oh, let me check." The guy who is standing beside the tallest guy offered humbly.
"Where are you headed?" The tallest guy asked her again.
"Going back to Lima." She smiled.
"Oh, we're headed that way too." The shorter guy nudged the taller guy.
"Oh, yes... yes we are. Do you want to ride with us?"
"Is it okay?" She asked.
"Of course." They said.
Santana went to ride with the college boys. The drive was full of funny conversations that distracted her for a while. But then Santana noticed that they are headed to a different direction.
"Whoa, wait. Wait! Lima is on the other way..." She said. The car stopped into an abandoned lot.
"Why did you stop?" She asked. "Lima is on the other way." Her heart is pounding predicting what's about to happen to her. Before she can escape a pair of hands grabbed her tightly. They blindfolded her. She was dragged out of the car by the two boys. She tried to scream but there's no use. One of them slapped her while the other one is holding her still. When Santana tried to fight back she was hit in the stomach. She received several punches and kicks one after the other. She was too numb to feel what's happening around her.
She woke up in the hospital a few days later. Her whole body aches. The first thing she saw is Brittany who is holding her hand tightly.
She came back to school after a week. No one else knew what happened to her aside from Brittany, her family and the glee club. Santana would often freak out whenever she saw boys wearing varsity jackets. It has been so tough for her. She started seeing a therapist that her dad recommended. The therapy helped her a lot.
She's starting to move on with her life. Everything seemed better again but then another unexpected incident happened to her. It almost crushed her to death when she found out that she's pregnant. Her mom didn't find out about that. Her dad took care of it. Right after graduation he sent Santana to London. Her dad turned into this cold-hearted man. He even hired someone to look after her own daughter.
"Dad, I was raped!" Santana was crying terribly in front of her dad. They were at the hospital where Dr. Lopez is working. Her dad said nothing for a long while. He just ignored his own daughter who is rambling about the night that it happened to her. "Do you think I want this baby inside of me? Well, I don't! But this is a part of me. Whether you like it or not I will raise this child!"
"Don't ever tell your mom about any of this!" her dad said sternly. "I'm sending you to London to study and grow that bastard inside you! You're going there alone!" Santana couldn't believe what she heard.
"NO! You can't do that to me!" She protested.
"Yes, I can! I am your father and you will do as I say. You will go to London next week... right after your graduation. You will not go back here until you finish your studies. That baby will go to a foster home. I'll take care of it."
"NO!" She shouted at her father. "How can you... how can you do this to me? I am your daughter, papi! Please see me... please look at me. I don't want to give this child to anyone else. Please. Let me keep my child!" Santana pleaded.
"You are such a disgrace to our family. Think about what other people would say. You have done so much damage. Think about your mom! Do you think she's happy to see you like that? We raised you, feed you, gave you everything you asked for... this is the least you can do in return Santana."
Santana walked out of his office. She realized that his dad is true. She couldn't blame her family. Her family meant everything for her. Her dad is right, that is the only thing she can do to pay them back for everything that they'd done for her.
"That's why I broke up with you, Brittany. I don't want you to wait for someone that is so unsure of her life. See where it brought you now." Santana explained.
Brittany didn't know what to say. The only thing she realized is that she loved Santana even more after she told her all those things.
"I missed you every single day. The morning sickness, the sleepless nights, the fatigues and cramps, the food cravings and all other things that happened during my pregnancy sucked!" She chuckled while crying. "It sucked because you are not with me. I wished every single day that I'd wake up beside you. I wished that you were there to take care of me, hold me and comfort me. I wished that one day I'll wake up and everything will go back to normal. But then, I get tired of wishing."
"I'm so sorry, Santana. I don't know... I don't know where to find you. I didn't know where you went. You know that I'd do anything to be with you. If only your dad told me where you went..." Brittany held Santana's hands.
"And then..." Santana continued. "And then... one day I woke up and she's gone. I had a miscarriage because of too much depression. My dad didn't care though. He still made me keep my mouth shut. Mami only learned about this after he died. She has the same reaction as yours."
The news broke Brittany to pieces. Her tears began to cascade her face again. She didn't say anything. She couldn't say anything. Instead, she pulled Santana into a hug. She rubbed Santana's back as she cried rivers of tears. Brittany could feel her pain.
They remain like that for a long time. Santana took a deep breath before pulling back.
"Well, past is past. We have to move on at some point. It hurts to let go, but it hurts more to hold on, you know? As they say, 'forget what hurt you but never forget what it taught you'. Life isn't going to make a move for you. You are the only one who can make a difference to your own life." Santana stated. "I'm responsible for my own life that's why I couldn't blame others for what happened to me. Life is about moving forward. That's why you have to do the same."
Brittany just looked at her deep in her eyes.
"But how can I move on if I'm still in love with you?" Brittany blurted out. "And I know that you feel the same way."
"Brittany, I can't do this. I'm engaged. As you can see," she pointed out at the picture in her desk, "that is Tyler... my fiancé."
"But he will never love you like I can. And you will never love him the way you love me."
"Britt-"
"Let's make it right this time Santana. You and me, let's do this together. Let's start over again." Brittany pleaded her. "Think about it Santana..." Brittany stood up and kissed Santana on the lips. She walked away from her.
She stopped by the door and said, "I'm sure that he is great but you can't recreate what you and I have. It's your choice... if you want me, I'm here." With that she left.
1 Day before the Foundation Day
"Okay. I think we are all set. Rachel, I just need to talk to you later. Do you have any questions?"
Santana raised her hand.
"Yes Santana?"
She cleared her throat. "Hm, since it's about reliving the past there's a song that I'd like to sing today... this is for a very special person in my life right now. Without this person I think I couldn't move on from the past. So, this song is for you..."
She went in front and started singing.
Uh, Uh ,Uh oh
You were in college working part time waiting tables
Left a small town, never looked back
I was a flight risk with a fear of falling
Wondering why we bother with love if it never lasts
She closed her eyes feeling every word that came out of her mouth.
I say can you believe it?
As we're lying on the couch
The moment I could see it
Yes, yes, I can see it now
Do you remember we were sitting there by the water?
You put your arm around me for the first time
You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter
You are the best thing that's ever been mine
Brittany stared at her during the rest of her performance. The rest of the glee club hummed in the background. Brittany wanted to run towards her and join her. But she just settled watching her in adoration.
Do you believe it?
We're gonna make it now
I can see it
I can see it now
They all applauded in her performance. She was shaking but smiled through the tears.
"Maybe you're all asking when I sang this song… I sang this as a dedication during-"
"Santana…"
All of them looked to the person who called Santana. They looked at each other trying to find some answers. Santana looks shocked as well.
"Tyler? Why… what are you doing here?" Santana asked.
Tyler came in to the room and pulled Santana closer to him. He kissed her on the lips. Gasps and whispers filled the room. Brittany looked down and said nothing.
"I got a little worried. You're not returning my calls. So I went here. Your mom told me that I can find you here…" Tyler smiled sweetly.
Santana looked at Brittany. She's panicking on the inside.
"Aren't you gonna introduce us to him, Santana?" Mr. Shue commented breaking the awkward silence.
"Oh, hi everyone… My name is Tyler. I'm Santana's fiancé."
Mr. Shue shook his hand while the rest of the club sat flabbergasted and surprised. Some of them looked from Brittany to Santana. They all wait for Brittany's reaction.
"Ty, can I talk to you outside?" Santana whispered. They went outside to talk. Santana looked at Brittany one last time.
There's a second or two interval before Quinn went to Brittany. Brittany was brought back to reality when she felt Quinn hugging her. She has no energy to fight today. She hugged Quinn back feeling defeated all over again.
"It's okay… it's okay." Quinn told her repeatedly. "Ssshhh. Everything is going to be fine."
"It's not Quinn… I'm afraid it's not."
Santana didn't arrive in the celebration the next day. The glee club was forced to make some adjustments to fill out Santana's spot. The performance was still a success. Brittany came to Santana's house right after their performance but she's not there. Maribel saw how miserable she was. She took Brittany in her arms and embraces her with all the love she can give.
Brittany is lying on the couch. Her head on Maribel's lap as she strokes her blonde locks.
"Are you okay, doll?" Maribel asked. Brittany shrugged her shoulders as an answer. "You'll be okay…" She said.
"I don't know mama. I love her. That's all I know."
"I know you do. She loves you too. But she has a different life in London now. I know it's hard to accept that fact. I've been there. Santana has been through a lot, doll. And you should understand that."
"Ma, why does this have to happen? I don't understand." Brittany's tears seemed to be endless.
"Everything happens for a reason, doll. Someday everything will make a perfect sense. But in the meantime you just have to deal with the confusion it brings." Maribel answered. "To love is to risk not being loved in return… but, what is love without taking any risk right? Do you get what I'm saying, doll?"
"Yes, mama. I get you now."
"Good… by the way she wants me to give you this." She handed Brittany a paper folded neatly. Brittany sat up and looked at Maribel. "I don't know what it says but whatever it is try to understand and respect her decision. Santana is so confused right now. She loves Tyler but she loves you too… so whatever she wrote in there try to face it bravely, doll." Maribel stood up to leave Brittany. "If two people are meant to be together, eventually their find their way back… no matter how impossible, unattainable, or unimaginable something may seem, if it's meant to be it'll be." With that she left Brittany and went to her room.
Brittany traced her name written on the outside page of the paper. She slowly opened the letter.
Brittany,
I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so you can learn to let go. People leave so you can stand alone. Things go wrong for you to appreciate them when they are right. Have you ever thought that if one thing hadn't happened, a whole set of things never would've either? Sometimes, people should break and fall apart for them to be better and stronger. And I think that it already happened to me. It took me so long to see this… or maybe I have known this all along I'm just too scared to admit it. I love you. And you are right I probably would've never loved anyone else like you. But things are not as simple as that - we fall in love and that's it. We live a happily ever after. Oh, no. Life is not a fairytale. We are no longer who we used to be. You are a complete different person now, and so am I. I have established a new life here in London with Tyler. He is a good man. The man I wished my father could've been. He accepted and loved me for who I am just as you loved me before. I wanted to thank you for all the things that happened when I came back there in Lima. Thank you for loving me unconditionally. The time of caring for my own happiness is over now. It's time that I consider making other people happy. It's time that I put their happiness above mine. Because in real life it's them that matters all along.
Tyler and I are on our way to London again. I'm sorry that I have to leave a little early. Because I know that if I stayed a little longer you'd ask me to be with you and I know that I would say yes immediately. But as I've said, it's time to put someone else happiness above mine. It would be better for us this way.
Starting all over again is not that bad… because when you restart, you get another chance to make it right.
-Santana
Brittany would not love any other person like she had loved Santana. She knows it very well and Santana knows it too. And real love story doesn't have an ending. After all, Brittany and Santana are soul mates… a match made from heaven.
The end. ;)
Hahaha. Thanks for reading guys!
Apologies for the mistakes in grammars/spellings.
Thoughts?