Of Remorse.
Severus stayed awake all night. He had done his job. He told The Dark Lord about the prophecy. He had no idea what that meant, though. He thought about what he did. He thought it was going to kill some wizard. Some witch, and their kid. He did not care. What was that to him? Who were they to him? I couldn't care less, he told himself.
But then, for some unknown reason, the picture of his love flashed before his eyes. He thought about Lily Evans. He thought about the only girl he ever loved. He thought about the only person he ever, truly loved. And he wondered. He wondered what she would have told him. He thought about all those times he had let her down. He thought about all those times he hurt her. And then he cursed himself. He cursed himself for cursing James Potter. He thought about how they all hated him.And then, it struck to him- it wasn't their fault. It was his fault. To have acted like a... he couldn't even think of a word. Why did he have to act like that? Like he never cared? He wouldn't have lost Lily Evans if he didn't call her a Mudblood. He shouldn't have.
Would he be forgiven now? After all this time? He could go there and tell Lily and Potter- The Potters, he reminded himself; how truly sorry he was. They had all grown up, right? They could all act mature. He would be forgiven. Okay, maybe not forgiven, but would be heard out, at least? He wished. He prayed.
Yes, he told himself. He would go and apologize. Everything would be better than now, he hoped. But he didn't know that The Dark Lord had other plans. He didn't know that the Dark Lord had figured out that the prophecy meant the Potters' son-Harry. He didn't know. He couldn't know.