Chapter 1: In the part of this universe that we know there is great injustice, and often the good suffer, and often the wicked prosper, and one hardly knows which of those is the more annoying. (Bertrand Russell)
I decided I'm going to give a second chance and re-upload my stories. Love you all.
Disclaimer: I own nothing. 'nuff said.
"People often wonder why I wear such a hideous color." I said to the silver haired man.
"Which color? You're wearing several." The silver haired male replied much to my surprise.
"Orange. Would you like to know why?" I asked.
"Sure." He said, once again surprising me once again.
"Well, I wear orange for a lot of reasons. I wear it because it's actually a pretty nice color so long as there's not too much of it. I wear it because it was the only thing I could get. I wear it because I want to stick out as a unique individual and be acknowledged. And I wear it because it's a happy color. It's hard to remember happy feelings and how to be happy when it feels like my home is the most dangerous place I could be. When it feels like everyone hates me." I said bitterly.
"Wait, why are you telling me all of this? I'm a complete stranger. Hell, we don't even know each other's names."
"Well you don't seem to hate me and I'd like someone to remember why I used to always wear orange and act the way I did. To me, it doesn't matter that you're a complete stranger so long as you don't hate me. I'm Naruto by the way, but you can call me whatever you like. Preferably not something mean." I said as a look of realization came across the older male's face.
"I'm Hatake Kakashi, and what do you mean you want someone to remember?"
"I'm tired. I'm tired of trying to be happy, trying to be stupid, and trying to be slow. I'm sick and tired of it all. I'm especially tired of being alone."
"Well you're not alone right now; and what about Hokage-sama?" Kakashi asked.
"Well Hatake-san, the Hokage tends to visit me once every other week whenever he can. Which is not often."
Because the Hokage's a very important person, and him being a very important person makes him a very busy man.
"Hmm…one day if you ever get the chance, you should try to befriend an ANBU. They're pretty anti-social at first but once you get past that they're great and loyal friends. They'll accept you, help you, guide you, and watch your back so long as you don't mind doing the same for them." Kakashi said thoughtfully.
"Thanks Hatake-san, I really appreciate what you've done for me. I must be on my way now lest you wish to be seen by any of your comrades with me." I said bowing deeply to the man before me.
"Wait, where might I be able to find you?" Kakashi asked.
"Well, other than my apartment the only other places I'm allowed in are the Academy, the Hokage Tower, Ichiraku's Ramen, and the forest. Although sometimes I go to the Hokage Mountain or the Memorial Stone." I said carefully.
Of course those aren't the only places I go. Just because I'm not allowed in a place doesn't mean I can't sneak or persuade my way in. Take the Hokage's secret library of ninja stuff as I like to call it. I sneak and persuade my way in there all the time. It allows me to visit Jiji and it also allows me to expand my knowledge.
As I was running/walking away I looked back momentarily to only to see Kakashi give an almost unnoticeable wave in my direction. A small smile snuck it's way onto my face. Maybe we could be friends? Ha, fat chance considering the way my life's been for the past 5 years of my life.
I slowed to a walk as I reached the 'ghetto' of Konoha. This place was the flipside of the so-called peaceful and wonderful Konoha. Half the time nobody cares who you are if you aren't worth their time, well unless you're me. The proclaimed 'demon child'.
Now that I think of it, there are many titles used to describe me. For example I've been called Naruto, brat, idiot, dobe, demon, pariah, civilian, evil, honest, deceitful, evil, and a murderer one a many times. It all makes me start to question what I really am sometimes. In all honesty I'm actually kind of scared to know the answer, but at the same time I want to know. I'm sick of the whispers and the stares. Of the lies, the secrets, and the multiple identities. How is it that I'm not allowed to know who or what I am, but everyone else is? I'm a living, breathing, organism same as everyone else as far as I know so how come I'm treated as if I'm lower than trash sometimes and accused of crimes I'd never heard of.
Since no one will give me the answers I seek I'll get them on my own. I sure as hell won't be going down without a fight either. I refuse to sit by silently anymore. I feel like I'm slowly starting to become what these people created and I don't want to be. I want to be my own person. I don't want to be the other person everyone seems to see when they look at me. When they seem to be looking at someone else instead of me.
'Look within for the answers you seek.'
I forgot where I heard that but it seems so cliché even if it fits the bill perfectly. Maybe I should start small by meditating. Heh, it's like they say, don't knock it till you try it.
I made it home with minimal acknowledgement thanks to my skill of being friendly with shadows and abandoned back alleys. I immediately locked and blockaded my door with as little noise as possible when I walked through the door. I also made sure no one was inside with me. The rags I call curtains were still doing their job of hiding me from everyone else thankfully.
I sat down on my futon and started trying to meditate.
Focus.
Focus on your goal.
Focus on the truth.
Focus on who and what you really are.
Focus on what's inside of you.
"Not now, not yet, but soon. Soon you will be able to speak with me. I will tell you what I know and you will learn half of the truth. Just remember, don't die, don't break, don't lose it, and don't let rage or hate consume you." Said an ominous voice inside my head.
Maybe I've already lost it? Oh well, it's probably to be expected. What with the life I've had thus far, I'm surprised it didn't happen sooner. On to other thoughts, I really hate a lot of the people in this god forsaken village. I hate them more than I hate myself which is saying something because I hate myself a whole lot although I don't know why. I think I hate myself because being me has caused me so much pain, or maybe because everyone else hates me so much. It might have rubbed off on me.
At this point I was in my bathroom staring at my cracked reflection in a broken mirror. I hate that reflection, but I hate the reflection of the stupid me even more. The me that was created thanks to those hateful people. The me that is the fruit of fear and paranoia. I shook my head for a few seconds to clear my mind of those negative thoughts.
Mold, rotting flesh, and vomit. That's what my bathroom smelled like if I was to be honest. Sometimes I wonder if the crap that get's flushed down the toilets is connected to my showerhead, but then I remember that every other bathroom in this building is in the same condition. Of course the only building that would allow me in is the shittiest apartment building in Konoha that's filled with anything (notice how it's not anyone but anything) that can pay the rent in some way.
Oi, why does my mind keep wandering back to negative stuff. Maybe I should just go to sleep for today and see if anything improves by tomorrow. Hopefully tonight I'll be able to have a decent sleep. Knowing my luck that won't happen…
a little over a month later/nighttime
(changing to 3rd person POV)
"I've got a tip off as to where the Kyuubi-runt lives. The only way for us to succeed is for us to drag him out of there. Get him while he sleeps and then torture him." Sneered one man in the small mob.
"Yeah, that sounds like a good plan." Stated another.
The group then started quietly divulging information and ideas amongst each other. Once finished they all nodded at one another with a leer and started in the direction of the dingier areas of Konoha with one building in mind. When they arrived, only 3 people went in and by the time they came back out they were carrying a duffle bag. One that just so happened to be filled with Naruto.
They carried him off to one of the distant training grounds that just so happened to also contain the memorial stone representing all those who have lost their lives in the line of duty for Konoha. It was there that they did unspeakable things. With a horrified Naruto, helpless to do anything.
The Next Day/Morning
(Kakashi's POV)
I was nearing the clearing in which the Memorial Stone was located when a very strong scent attacked me. A foul scent mixed with a familiar scent. Sensing no danger, I walked up to the source of it.
"Naruto? Are you alright?" I asked, very worried.
He was hunched over his knees sitting behind the Memorial Stone, staring off into nothing. When he looked up, he had a hauntingly bloody and bruised face. Without a second thought I picked up the child in front of me and rushed him to a hospital. No one there would help him until I threatened to either get the Hokage involved or take care of them myself. Meaning I would be taking names and making hits. It was only then that they begrudgingly started rushing to his aid.
I stayed with him the whole time to make sure they were actually caring for him properly. By the time they were done his head, torso, and arms were covered in bandages. Then I left the room for a few minutes so I could get something edible for him to eat once he woke up. When I got back I had to take care of a few people trying to kill him.
I heaved a deep sigh and decided to take him home. It seems that "it" is helping out by speeding up his healing process. I guess "it's" actually good for something other than causing trouble. The boy in my arms stirred a bit, but I couldn't be sure if he was awake or not. He had bandages covering his eyes.
"K-Kakashi-san? Is that you?" he asked hoarsely, "What happened to my eyes? Why can't I see? What about those people?
"Yes Naruto it's me. As for your questions I only know the answers to a few and I won't be answering them till you get some more rest. At the moment we are on our way to my place, okay?" I said gently.
He nodded his head slightly in response and then kind of nuzzled into my chest.
During this past month missions have been slow for me and I've had a lot of free time. I spent a lot of that free time with the blonde in my arms and grew fond of him quite fast. I don't really like children all that much but Naruto has managed to become an exception. He is very mature for his age which might be part of the reason why I like him. Either way, seeing him like this is really depressing and makes me feel like I failed at protecting what's precious to me again.
We arrived at my small apartment in a timely manner and Naruto awoke once more.
"Where are we now? It smells like you and dogs." Naruto mumbled to me, momentarily distracted.
"We're at my place." I replied sounding nonchalant while looking for an extra shirt that hopefully is too small for me.
I wasn't quite sure how to feel or respond to the comment of this place smelling like 'me and dogs' so I simply ignored in favor of looking for something to replace the hospital gown he was wearing.
"You're at my place because the hospital isn't safe. You're covered in bandages because you've been severely injured. You can't see because your eyes probably received the most damage. Those are the only answers I know. Now how about you try this shirt on." I said, throwing him an old shirt of mine.
After about maybe 5 minutes of him grabbing around I remembered he couldn't see.
"Would you like some help?" I asked.
He grunted an affirmative. I walked over to him and placed the shirt in his hands. And the fact that he was temporarily blind belatedly came back to me again. Meaning he can't dress and undress by himself yet. So I helped him out of the gown and into the shirt.
"Thanks." He mumbled to me.
"Not a problem. You can stay here if you like?" I offered.
"Yes please." He answered curtly.
Now this is very weird…he's usually not that polite when he's with me. Something really bad must have happened. They probably scarred him mentally as well more than usual…
"Naruto…I'm not the best when it comes to comforting someone so the most I can do for you right now is offer you a hug and whatever else I have…" I stated with my arms open.
I scooped him up in my arms and cradled him to my chest. I heard him started whimpering and felt him shaking. I pulled away for a moment only to notice the tears streaming out from behind the bandages. They were tinted slightly because of the blood. I went over to my couch with him in my arms, and pulled a blanket over us when I got there.
I tried to whisper as many reassurances to him as I could, but I could only think of a few. Either way I repeated them and encouraged them as best I could. At least I did so until I was sure he was fast asleep.
I sighed deeply.
"I'm getting soft and attached aren't I?" I mumbled to myself.