*KIND REMINDER: English isn't my language*
Now I'm a hard TOWEN shipper but I used to love Owen and Cristina when Henry was alive and there for Teddy (I always thought how things would have been if Teddy had actually been Owen's sister from the beginning) but since Henry is dead and Cristina is gone...
If you read my others fics "Life After You/Turning Page" you'll probably know they are pretty old fics, I just polished them and added more chapters, I wrote this fic around the same time, so yes, its quite old, so when I found it yesterday already translated into my files I decided to publish it. Once again I only made some corrections but in general it's the same thing that I wrote years ago.
So go grab some coffee, some snack or just get comfortable, it's a long one shot ;) I hope you enjoy it! And and if you get to the end let me know what you think! (also if you don't)
I Wish You Love
I wish you bluebirds in the spring to give your heart a song to sing and then a kiss, but more than this I wish you love… My breaking heart and I agree that you and I could never be so with my best, my very best I set you free… I wish you shelter from the storm, a cozy fire to keep you warm, but most of all, when snowflakes fall I wish you love…
"I said that I love you so much that it hurts, I said it hurts to love you."
"Passengers on flight number 1503 to for Frankfurt".
"I'll always be in love with you, you are the love of my life, I will never love another woman".
"Passengers on flight number 1503 to Frankfurt, please board gate number 8"
"Don't leave me until you're leaving me ..."
"Passengers on flight number 1503 to Frankfurt, please board gate number 8, passengers on flight number 1503 to Frankfurt, please board gate number 8".
A feminine and monotonous voice through a speaker pulled Owen out of his absorption, he couldn't believe that after all they went together he and Cristina were now, definitely separated, that man who had taken small pieces of her in the past had managed to take her away forever from his side, from his life.
Honestly Owen didn't blame her; he knew what was the real force driving Cristina's life. Cut. What filled her soul and mind. Surgery. The reason why she got up every morning and the last thing she thought before going to sleep. Hearts. The reason why, without hesitation, she took a plane to Switzerland. Blood.
Shaking his head once more from the hurtful thoughts, Owen took his small carry-on and went to the corresponding gate, finally, after almost a year he would see his best friend and confidant, Teddy. Just thinking about her and what her life had turned into made him smile in the midst of his grief.
Teddy and Henry had moved to Landstuhl about 5 years ago. She continued directing MedCom and Henry got his degree in architecture, his final project being their beautiful, modern and huge house on the outskirts of the city that contrasted with the old architecture of the area. They had two children, fraternal twins, Madeleine and Théo, a pair of hurricanes of which Owen and Arizona were good-parents.
Thinking about them made his smile grow even more, he loved that pair of kids as if they were his and he was grateful to their parents for letting him be part of their lives even though they lived in different continents. He could still remember when Teddy told him she was pregnant, she and Henry were still living in Seattle and just after the twins were born she received the offer to run MedCom, however she hesitated to accept it and although it hurt him in the soul to know that if she took the offer she, Henry and the twins would leave America, he knew that Teddy deserved this opportunity so he encouraged her to follow her dreams.
And now it was Teddy's turn to give him back some of that support; Teddy knew that Owen and Cristina had broken up, even she tried to convince him by all means to think things better and although he assured her it was the best she still had her reservations, she was so happy in her new life as a wife, mother and chief and wanted the same for her best friend, so when she learned that Owen and Cristina were again in a kind of "relationship" she didn't doubt that they would try again, until Owen called to inform her that Cristina was leaving his life forever.
Teddy felt her heart sink, after all that Owen had lived he deserved to be happy, in his call she could notice how devastated he was so without hesitation she invited him to come to her house and spend a few days with her and her family, it was July, the hottest month of the year, they had just built a big pool so it was the perfect excuse for Owen to leave Seattle for a few days and clear his mind, Teddy hoped that between distance, she, Henry and especially the children will get him out of the depressing state he was in.
And so, Owen was at the Barajas airport in Madrid, boarding a flight bound to Frankfurt where Teddy and Henry would already be waiting to travel to Landstuhl by car. The flight was relatively quiet and without delay, Owen was urged to get to Teddy's house, not only because he was exhausted, but also longed for the distraction that the Altman-Burton could provide, if he didn't do so, he feared that his mind would get cloudier with the absence of the love of his life, Cristina.
After collecting the rest of his luggage Owen went to the exit when he saw two figures that he knew perfectly; Henry was standing next to Teddy, holding in his hands a sign that read "Major Hunt" and Teddy had in her hands a handful of helium balloons with legends like "Welcome", "We miss you", "Welcome home", "Happy Holidays " and a golden one with child handwriting that said "Welcome, Uncle Owen, we miss you, Maddie and Théo". Immediately the sadness became less heavy on his shoulders.
Owen went to where his friends were, both looked so happy and Teddy looked radiant, with a vaporous sundress, a light cardigan and, was that? Did she? Owen was stunned.
"Can you stop looking and give me a hug?" Teddy said with a huge smile opening her arms to him.
He was perplexed. "Teddy... You, you're pregnant! Why didn't you tell me anything?"
"I wanted it to be a surprise... but enough of me, come here, I missed you so much." Teddy said giving a big hug to her best friend. Owen immediately took her in his arms and lifted her slightly off the ground making her shriek, he missed her so much. In any other circumstance Henry would have put some objection, but it was Hunt, he knew that his intentions were just friendly, they were also best friends, he had even added him to the WhatsApp group of Grey Sloan male surgeons.
"I missed you so much". Owen whispered into Teddy's ear, sinking his face into her soft sandy blond hair.
"Me too".
Then he let go of her arms and turned to greet Henry, also giving him a hug but slapping their back as the good males they were. "It's so good to have you here, bro."
"I couldn't wait to get here."
"Well, you're here so come on!" Henry said.
Owen looked at Teddy affectionately again. "You should have told me of your condition, I wouldn't have made you come to Frankfurt for me, I know the way to Landstuhl."
Henry hugged Teddy from behind placing his hands on her belly. "Trust me; you wouldn't have wanted to have that argument with her." And then he kissed her temple. Owen felt a small twinge in his chest, he didn't have that anymore.
"Don't tell me, she has been all moody and bitchy." Both men laughed, earning a jab from Teddy.
"Hey, I'm here!" Teddy said pretending offended. "Besides, you have never come to Germany in summer, you will love the landscape, everything is so green and so beautiful."
"Ok, ok enough, let's go! Maddie and Théo are waiting for you anxiously". Henry interrupted as he took part of Owen's luggage.
"By the way, where are the children? Why didn't you bring them with you?"
"They are with my sister-in-law, I forgot to tell you, it will be a funny and crowded weekend, Laura, her husband and daughters are also visiting." Teddy replied.
"No, not at all! Also, some distraction will be good." Owen answered and Teddy could feel the heaviness and pain in his voice.
She gave him a gentle squeeze on the shoulder and then rubbed his back. "I shouldn't even ask you how you are then". Teddy said softly, Owen just shrugged and gave her a tight smile, then the trio walked towards the parking lot.
"By the way, congratulations for the new baby, you must be thrilled." Owen said once the trio was already on its way to Landstuhl.
"Thank you, and I'm not going to lie, the truth is that I am, I think I'm more excited than Teddy." Henry answered, behind the wheel and without looking away from the road.
"Hey, it's my baby too, of course I'm happy, who isn't happy is Maddie."
"Why?!" Owen asked, amused.
"Well, she is happy, she just doesn't want it to be a girl, she wants to be the only daddy's girl." Teddy answered.
Owen laughed. "Jealous much?"
"Like mother like daughter". Henry added and Teddy gave him a light slap on the arm and a quick kiss on the lips.
"And how are you feeling?" Owen asked Teddy.
"Good!" Teddy answered, rubbing her baby bump. "Well, I'm barely 25 weeks along, but considering how I felt with the twins, I'd say excellent".
"Oh yes, I remember it perfect when you vomited in the O.R." Owen said, laughing. "And you, Henry?"
"Excellent". Henry answered with his characteristic million dollars smile. "My disease is under control and the last surgery I had was two years ago."
"Wow, I'm very happy for you, for you two."
An hour and a half later they deviated on the road and entered a tree-lined path, at the end were the huge and modern Altman-Burton's home, two floors, glass walls, wood and marble mixed in perfect harmony and large gardens.
"Wow, Henry, the house is amazing, good work!" Owen said in amazement as he got out of the car admiring the front of the house.
"Oh, please don't say that or he'll start bragging about how it was the best project of his class!" Teddy added, feigning annoyance, Henry just gave her a sweet kiss on the lips and a soft spanker. "I'm kidding, although I was a bit reluctant I ended up falling in love with the house, but come on, you still have to see the best part."
When Henry opened the door of the house the shrill of two toddlers received Owen. "Willkommen zuhause, onkel Owen!" The twins shrieked in unison while throwing confetti and colored balloons.
"In English, kiddos!" Henry reprimanded.
"Warum, vati?" Maddie asked, innocently.
"Because Uncle Owen doesn't speak German, it's rude."
"Ok daddy!"
"And where are Auntie Laura and Uncle Robert?" Teddy asked when she saw the children alone at home.
"Uncle Robert and my cousins went to the supermarket and Auntie Laura is upstairs." Théo answered.
"Ok... now, say hello to Uncle Owen." Henry encouraged and the twins and ran to hug Owen, he knelt on the floor to be at the level of the little ones. He hugged them tightly, as if his life depended on it. The reception so effusive that both their parents and children gave him was just what he needed; suddenly it was as if everything had ceased to exist outside that house, as if everything had stopped hurting.
"Children, why don't you show Uncle Owen his room?" Teddy suggested to the children.
"YES! Come on uncle, you'll like your room a lot, I helped Mommy decorate it". Théo said.
"Oh Teddy, you didn't have to do that, I'll only be here a few days." Owen said, ashamed.
"I know, but from now on you'll have a room for every time you decide to come visit us, since today you officially have your own room in our home."
Owen was perplexed. "Don't look so excited!" Henry joked. "You're practically family, man; it's the least we could do."
"I... I, I don't know what to say." Owen replied, swallowing the lump in his throat.
"Don't say anything, and go!" Teddy said.
"Come on, uncle!" Théo exclaimed, pulling Owen's hand and both walked hurriedly upstairs, followed closely by little Maddie.
Henry and Teddy watched with a smile as the children surrounded Owen and took him to his room. "It hit him hard." Henry said as he embraced Teddy from behind and laid his chin on her shoulder.
She let out a sigh. "I know, I can't believe that he and Cristina are over, they were meant for each other." Teddy replied, sadly.
"You should talk to him; it's clear he needs it."
"Yes, that's what I'll do, but first I want him to enjoy this day with us before talking to him about Cristina. Should I tell him I talked to her?"
"I don't know babe, but whatever you decide you'll do the right thing."
Teddy turned in his arms and hugged him by the neck. "I love you so much, Henry, I don't know what would be of my life if one day we broke up." Her voice began to shake. "I don't know what would be of my life without you."
"I will not go anywhere, not without you and our children, I love you so much Teddy… that will never change." And he kissed her deeply.
"Feel, feel, feel, it's kicking!" Teddy said, breaking the kiss and placing Henry's hand on the side of her rounded belly.
Henry knelt in front of her. "Hi there, baby, don't you get tired of giving battle?" And he placed a soft kisses while rubbing her belly.
"I would dare to say that he or she is more active than the twins." Teddy said joining her hand to Henry's.
"It's because it will be like its mom, a warrior."
"You are the warrior, my love." Teddy replied, stroking his hair with her free hand.
And they both continued to marvel at the movements of their little baby, just at that moment Owen appeared at the bottom of the stairs. The couple didn't notice his presence. He remained looking at them, seeing how they exchanged gestures of love, soft smiles and looks with secret languages that only the two of them understood. Owen felt like a stalker watching them in silence, but as much as he wanted to move his feet from the luxurious oak floor, they simply stood motionless and it seemed like someone had sewed his lips. And once again that twinge, it wasn't voluntary, just the manifestation of years of dreams and hopes destroyed, his biggest dream, being a father, he probably would never get what Henry was experiencing, he would never feel the embrace of two warm little arms around his neck, shrieking little voices telling him "Daddy" or feeling his baby move inside the love of his life.
"It is moving?!" The screams of the twins knocked Owen out of his trance. The two little ones joined their parents and placed their little hands on their mommy's belly.
Owen would lie if he said he didn't feel envious, but immediately tried to put that feeling aside, Teddy didn't deserve that, let alone Henry. Christ! He had witnessed all the hell that that good man had gone through, surgeries, relapses, being on the verge of death countless times, Teddy trying to deal with work, two little energetic toddlers and taking care of her husband, of course they both deserved all this and much more, he just hoped that in the future life would reward him in the same way.
That day the whole family enjoyed a delicious barbecue in the garden, cooked by Henry and Robert, while Teddy and Laura rested in the terrace and Owen was swimming with the children in the pool.
"Is something wrong with Owen? I noticed something odd when he arrived." Laura asked Teddy as she drank her lemonade and looked at the children in the pool.
"He broke up with Cristina for good; she's already living in Switzerland." Teddy said, solemnly.
Laura turned to Teddy and flinched. "He must be broken, I mean, I only saw her once, when Théo and Maddie were born, and I thought she was… a pretty special woman, temperamental, if I hadn't known she was Owen's partner I would never have guessed."
"Yes, when I knew it I couldn't believe it either, but in one way or another they made their relationship work, until their different goals in life separated them."
"Different life goals? Isn't she a surgeon too?"
"I don't mean work, but... Owen is a family man, he loves children, his greatest desire is to form a family and Cristina... let's say that Cristina's greatest priority in life is her work".
"Oh, I understand, it's a shame... poor Owen, I'm sure he must feel terrible, see your family, I mean, after you two you know… Think that he could've had a family with you".
Teddy's eyes opened like saucers, she told Laura about her past with him, but for years she hadn't thought about Owen as a man, the thought that Maddie and Théo could have been his children never crossed her mind, for her Owen was her best friend, practically the brother she never had, the only man in her life was and would be forever Henry, the love of her life, the father of her three kids, her beginning and her end. And the exact same thing happened in Owen's case, he adored Teddy, he practically considered her a sister, the sister he never had(*), his only desire for her was of protection, taking care, punch the face of whoever hurt her, defend her like the older brother she never had.
"Laura... but what are you talking about? Please don't ever say this to Henry, it's totally inappropriate and out of place, Owen and I are friends, siblings I would say, and Henry is his best friend so please..."
"I know, I know Teddy, sorry, I didn't mean that, forget what I said." Laura apologized. Both fell in an uncomfortable silence, watching Henry and Robert put the meat to grill and the children play with Owen in the pool.
"Splash!" Maddie, Théo, Bella and Lily; daughters of Robert and Laura, shrieked.
"Splash?" Robert and Henry repeated, looking at their women. Robert went to Laura and she immediately got up from the couch and together they jumped into the pool creating a huge splash and making the children laugh.
Henry went to Teddy with a threatening look. "Oh no, Henry Burton, you wouldn't dare!"
"Wanna bet?" Everyone in the pool kept shouting 'splash', even Owen, who finally had been genuinely happy and at ease since he had arrived in Germany, with little Théo siting on his shoulders.
"No, Henry, I'm pregnant, you wouldn't dare to throw me into the pool!" Teddy warned him.
"Who said I would throw you into the pool?" With a gentle but careful movement Henry lifted her into his strong arms and walked with her to the pool.
"Henry, I swear to God, if you let me fall..."
"I'll not let you fall, you are carrying a very precious cargo to let you fall." The rest couldn't stop laughing and yelling.
"Henry, let me down, I mean it!"
"Of course I'll let you down." With great care Henry went down the steps of the pool and once inside he let Teddy fall with extreme delicacy in the water and then help her stand on the slippery bottom of the pool.
"I hate you so much". Teddy said with a smile as she hugged her husband by the neck.
"I know". He answered and then kissed her gently.
"Mommy, Daddy, look, Uncle Owen and I have a trick, look, look!" Little Théo exclaimed.
"What will you do, Hunt? Will you take that insufferable boy and exchange him for a well behaved one?" Henry joked. 'Without thinking twice I would take him.' Owen thought, he loved that boy, also Maddie, but he felt that with little Théo he had a greater connection, maybe because in character and physically he was more like Teddy, or because he was his godson, or because he was the only boy in his life, he didn't know, but what he did know was that he loved that boy with all his heart.
"Henry!" Teddy scolded him.
"Don't be silly, Daddy, I can't go with Uncle Owen." The little one chuckled. "But look, look!"
"Show us baby!" Teddy encouraged him.
"Ready, kiddo?" Owen asked. Théo only nodded once firmly.
With the same determination of his mother, Théo rose carefully to stand on Owen's shoulders, swaying a bit until he managed to balance his slender body. "One…Two…Three!" And the little one jumped into the pool, causing his parents and his uncle Owen to clap, shout and cheer.
"How did you do it?" Teddy asked Owen.
"Do what?"
"Getting Théo to jump into the pool? He's terrified of doing that."
"Really? I don't know it was his idea I just helped him."
"He adores you, Owen, although they don't see you often Maddie and Théo adore you... at school they had to make a presentation of the person they loved most besides their parents and they talked about you."
Owen didn't know what to say, it was the cutest thing he had heard in a long time. "And I adore them."
"The food is ready!" Robert informed the rest of the family.
The rest of the afternoon passed in great harmony, everyone ate, laughed, played and even sang. It was a perfect day, Teddy, Henry and the children were happy to have Owen at home and not to mention him; really this trip was what he needed to clear his mind a bit of the mess that was in his life.
The night came and once all the children were in bed, the adults congregated on the terrace around the bonfire; Robert and Laura wrapped in a blanket, Owen and Teddy in another and Henry lying in Teddy's lap while she played with his hair; It was a truly confusing picture, a pregnant woman cuddled on her best friend's side, wrapped in a blanket and the head of her husband in her lap, anyone who didn't know them would think they were crazy, or was a kind of polyamory or something, but it was just the sign that a man and a woman could be friends.
"I'll go for more snacks; can you help me with the lemonade and the beers?" Teddy whispered to Owen. This would be the perfect opportunity to talk to him.
"Sure!"
Helping her up, they both went inside the house. Henry gave Teddy a wink as a sign of support; he knew the time had come to talk to him.
"Don't you think Teddy and Owen are very close?" Laura asked.
"Laura!" Her husband and brother said in a warning tone.
"What? It is the truth!"
"You'll never fully accept Teddy, isn't it?" Henry asked.
"Brother, it's not that, but it's just that your story is so weird, who gets married to a stranger just to offer him medical insurance? It's absurd, and then it turned out that she loved you?"
"Well, that's how things went whether you like it or not, I'm sorry for the ordinariness of your love story but my story with Teddy is not, our story is a good story and it will continue to be, we are together, we love each other, we have two beautiful and healthy kids and another on its way and my disease is under control, believe me, this will only get better!" Henry ranted, leaving everyone in silence.
Meanwhile in the kitchen, Teddy and Owen ignored what was happening outside.
"Teddy, you have a beautiful home." Owen said as he sat on a stool by the large white marble island in the center of the kitchen.
"Thank you, although in reality all the credit goes to Henry and the decorators, I just brought my clothes." She answered, sheepishly.
"It's not just that Teddy, yes, it's a beautiful house but since you enter you can feel the warmth of home and that, not even the best decorator can do it."
"I'm glad you feel comfortable in my home."
"How not to do it? My favorite people in the planet live here." She smiled. "Boy or girl?" Owen asked, out of the blue.
"Oh... I don't know! In fact neither I nor Henry wants to know until it's born." Teddy replied rubbing her rounded belly receiving a few small taps from the baby. "It's awake. Do you want to feel it?"
"Sure!" And Owen placed his hand gently on her baby bump, and moments later the tapping stopped.
"Everything will be fine Owen, you will see it." Teddy said taking the stool next to him and taking his hand in hers.
He huffed. "I don't know Teddy, I don't think so... never in my life had I felt so much uncertainty about the future."
"It's normal; you ended a very important relationship in your life."
"I miss her like you have no idea, wherever I go I look for her face, hoping to see someone who assimilates her, her mouth or her voice, but it's impossible, nobody will ever be like her". Owen's voice trembled more than once.
"I'm so sorry things ended like this."
"When we said goodbye that day at the airport, when you, Henry and the kids moved here, you told me to fight for her, and look what I did, I ruined everything Teddy, I ruined it!" And he burst into tears, even though he tried to contain the tears they just kept falling, until he stopped fighting, after all he was with Teddy, one of the few people who had seen him shatter, and It felt so good, in no time Teddy hugged him tightly.
"Cry, cry all you want, let it out, I'm here." Teddy comforted him as if he were a small child, as she would do with any of her children when they woke up in the night crying because they had had a nightmare. Minutes later his crying stopped.
"Sorry, I-I…"
"It's okay, it's okay, you needed it."
"What should I do Teddy? How do I move on?"
"It's not me who should tell you that, you'll solve it... but do whatever your heart tells you."
"My heart tells me to go to Switzerland and look for her."
"Then do it". Teddy replied, with determination. "If you really love her and you think you can still solve things then go for her... and if not, only time will tell you what to do."
"Teddy, it's not that easy... yes, I love her, but our goals are so different that I'm afraid history will repeat itself."
"Owen, can I give you some advice?"
"Please!"
"Never expect things to be as you visualize them all your life, nothing is how you plan, you planned to have a wife, children and yet you fell in love with a person with completely different plans, with this I don't mean to leave aside your dreams and focus on what she wants, but look for a balance, a middle point and I know it will not be easy, you and Cristina are the most stubborn people I've ever met in life, but... if really you love her and see your life with her then look for her and if you feel that your dreams are bigger then move on, you are an incredible person Owen, any woman would be honored to be by your side, you deserve the world".
"When I'm with her I can't think of anything else, I don't care about anything or anyone, but when I see those families on the street... Hell! When I saw you and Henry with the children I couldn't help feeling envious". Owen said, sadly and looking down.
Maybe it was the right thing to say that she had talked to Cristina, maybe it would clear up his doubts. "I talked to her" Teddy blurted.
Owen lifted his head and looked her straight in the eyes. "What, when, what did she tell you?"
"It was a quick call, she needed some files about a surgery that we did a few years ago and well, one thing led to the other and we ended up talking about you." Teddy answered.
"So, what did she say to you? God, Teddy, talk!" Owen pushed.
"I can only tell you that she loves you, Owen she, she... look for her, go find her, believe me, you'll not regret it".
"Are you sure?! Teddy, I don't know what I'm going to do if, if she doesn't..."
She cupped his face. "Believe me! When did I lie to you?" Owen chuckled softly. "Or... you can come back and kidnap my children whenever you want."
Owen laughed out loud. "Maybe you'll regret saying that."
"Maybe, but I say it because I don't think you can stand them, in three days you'll return them to me!" She answered, laughing too.
"So... I'm going to Switzerland!" Owen said, enthusiastically.
"You're going to Switzerland!"
"I'm going to Switzerland!"
Both hugged in a mixture of laughter, tears and words of encouragement.
"Are we laughing or crying?" Henry interrupted them with a puzzled look.
"Both!" They answered in unison. Henry just nodded, frowning.
"He's going to Switzerland!" Teddy informed her husband with a huge smile.
"SHUT-UP! He's going to Switzerland?!" Teddy nodded energetically. "Oh men, come here, this deserves a toast!" Henry said, hugging Owen by the shoulders and leading him to the small bar next to the kitchen.
"Hey, no! You can't toast, not when I can't drink alcohol!" Teddy complained offended following them.
"I'm sorry babe, but you'll have to settle for grape or apple juice, just pretend its red wine or whiskey." Henry answered, giving her a soft kiss on the lips.
"I hate you!" She said, smiling. "By the way babe, I just gave Owen absolute permission to come and kidnap the kids whenever he wants." Teddy said, while she poured herself a glass of iced tea.
"Really? And you couldn't take them now?"
"What's wrong with you two?!" Owen laughed. "I'll take that beautiful pair of kids and you'll never see them again." Owen warned them.
"You'll be back with them in three days." Henry answered as he struggled with the cork of a bottle of champagne.
"Told ya!" Teddy added.
"You two really are crazy!"
"I'd like to see you deal with them at breakfast time or bedtime." Teddy said and then the pop of the cork made them jump and laugh.
Henry poured a glass for Owen and another for him, Teddy with her huge glass of iced tea. "Well, let's toast, my toast will be for love". Henry said, raising his glass. "Because love can do everything, because I love my talented, beautiful and hot wife and because love will make this man travel to Switzerland in search of his better half, cheers!"
"Cheers!" The trio said in unison.
"And I want to make another toast." Teddy added. "I want to toast for you two; Henry, my amazing and warrior husband, thank you for these years of love and for our three children and Owen, thanks for all the years of friendship, the advices, the words of encouragement and for being the brother I never had, cheers!"
"Cheers!"
"You are making me really difficult to leave." Owen said, solemnly. "I love you too, more than my best friends you are my siblings."
"We love you too". Teddy replied with a squeeze on his shoulder.
It was late when Cristina finally arrived at her apartment, of that she was sure, not the exact hour but it was quite late, or rather, pretty early, possibly a couple of hours before dawn, she was exhausted, her brain was working almost by inertia.
When she opened her apartment's door an icy breeze welcomed her, but nobody else, the place was empty, although that was something Cristina already knew, no one would receive her when she got home, neither today nor tomorrow, she was alone, but she was happy, wasn't she?
No. The truth was that Cristina wasn't happy, yes, she had the job of her life, she was doing what she loved and lived in a luxurious apartment in Zurich, anyone could say that her life was perfect, but it was useless to have all that if she didn't have what she loved most, the hug, the affection, the touch, the breath and the body of the man she had loved the most in life, Owen.
She would never come home expecting to tell him how was work, her next projects or just lay with him on the couch while he reviewed medical records and she ate cereal directly from the box watching trashy television.
Was all this worth it? Was it worth it to give up the love of her life for a hospital? Maybe it was, maybe it wasn't, but now it was too late to know.
She could not help but remember the conversation she had with Teddy on the phone, that talk was the closest she got to knowing how Owen was, and it was exactly as she expected, he was shattered, her departure had left him in a spiral fall, she would lie if she said she didn't feel guilty, but more than that she felt lonely, empty, she needed her other part, her better half.
While Burke took small pieces of her, little by little Owen filled those empty spaces with his love and attention. He made her do and say things that she never thought to say or do and now, seeing it objectively, she had to recognize that Owen always lived satisfying all her wants and needs, he lived to make her happy, leaving aside his dreams to make her dreams true, even his dream of becoming a father, until it was so big that neither love nor good sex could compensate.
But it was too late for that, all her life she insisted in convincing people that she didn't want children, that they were not her priority and that she would only be distracted from what was really important, surgery, it was too late to repent, to show, like Meredith and Teddy, that children were not an impediment to being a super surgeon, besides, surely everyone would see her as the hypocrite who fell for the charms of a pair of beautiful eyes and a toothless smile. It was too late, everything was over.
Without bothering to take off her coat and much less her shoes Cristina laid down on the sofa looking thoughtfully at the ceiling, remembering all the good times she lived with Owen, she could almost remember the tone of his voice whispering words of love in her ear, the touch of his skin against hers, his masculine scent after making love, she could almost feel his presence close to her.
Suddenly the doorbell brought her back to reality with a start. Who the hell was at this hour? Christ! Will Shane never stop looking for her? How many times did she have to tell him that it was over? Reluctantly, Cristina got up from the sofa and went furious, with a firm step to open the door.
"How many times do I have to tell you...? OWEN!" Seeing Owen on the other side of the door left her breathless. "W-what, what are you doing here?"
All the words Owen had planned to tell her vanished from his head. "I, I..."
"You what?!" Cristina asked, exasperated.
There, there was the Cristina he knew. Encouraging himself, he straightened his back and cleared his throat. "Listen to me, Cristina Yang, because I'll only say this once" Owen said in a warning tone. "I love you, I love you as I've never loved and will never love any other woman, you are the love of my life, my body lives for you, my heart beats for you and my mind can only think of you, since you left, my life has been miserable and I know that also yours, I can see it in your eyes and I can also see that you love me... but the fact that I love you doesn't mean that I'll live again to please you in everything, If you love me and you want us to work, I'm willing to move to Switzerland and leave everything in Seattle just for you, but you must also do your part, be a couple, look for balance, make this work once and for all, because I love you and you love me so if you accept here I am, opening my heart again!" Owen ranted, running out of breath.
Cristina was speechless at Owen's rant, of course she loved him, loved him with every fiber, with every drop of blood, with every minuscule cell of her being, she couldn't believe that Owen was here at her doorstep willing to try it again, she would be an idiot if she wouldn't accept an offer like this, and definitely Cristina Yang graduated from Stanford was anything but an idiot.
"Well, say something!" Owen demanded, Cristina just looked at him with an open mouth, and even though she wanted to talk the words couldn't come out. "Ok, I understand". He said, defeated and turned around to leave forever her life.
Watching him go made Cristina react. "OWEN, WAIT!" And he turned to look at her, she ran to him, jumping, circling her legs around his hips and arms around his neck, kissing him deeply and passionately, immediately Owen walked into her apartment, closing the door with a loud bang, going to the sofa he laid her down hovering over her.
"I love you, Owen. I love you, I love you, I love you". Cristina said again and again between kisses.
And minutes later words weren't needed, their hands, their touches, their kisses and their bodies spoke for them. Once again the fire was there, passion, mind-blowing sex and true love. Both satiated their bodies to exhaustion, as in the old days, no, better. Moments later they lay naked and satiated on the couch, their sweaty bodies pressed close against each other, Owen played with Cristina's raven-black curls and she caressed his warm bare chest with her dainty fingers that only hours before had held a motionless and cold heart.
"I can't believe I'm here with you again." Owen said, drowsy.
"Me neither... when you came to knock on my door... Just at that moment I was thinking about you, it was as if I had called you with my mind".
"Come and look for you has been the best thing I've done, Teddy was right".
"What?!" Cristina shouted, leaning on her elbow and looking into his eyes. "Don't tell me you talked to Teddy!"
"Yes. Why? I wasn't supposed to do it?"
"What did she say?
"Nothing, well, she told me that she had talked to you, but she didn't tell me what about, she only encouraged me to come and find you."
"She better don't!" Cristina said, laying her head on his shoulder again, she would die of shame if one day Owen came to know what she talked with Teddy. "If she told you I'll kill her, I will not care leaving orphans at those ridiculously beautiful children."
And there she was, his Cristina again, the one he loved, sarcastic, he couldn't help laughing out loud. "You wouldn't dare!"
"Of course not! They are so stupidly cute that I wouldn't even dare tear a hair out of them, much less kill their mother... Maybe I'll just hurt her." She said, with conviction.
Again Owen laughed, he couldn't stop, it was as if he was recovering from all those months of grief and sadness. "What did you talk about that you don't want me to know?"
"Don't be noisy and be satisfied with knowing that I love you". Cristina answered, giving him a kiss on his side.
"So, does that mean that…?"
"I love you Owen, I'm willing to try again, to be a couple and make our dreams true and make each other happy"
"Are you sure?"
Cristina rose again on her elbow to look at him. "I am so sure, that I'm willing to talk about children".
Owen was speechless. Was this true? Was Cristina willing to talk about the possibility of having children? "And?"
"I want us to clarify something Owen, I told you once, I'm not a monster if we were to have a child of course I would love it."
"So?"
"I want this to be a commitment, to make us happy without compromising the happiness of the other."
"Meaning?"
"I'm willing to try to have a child with you." Owen's smile could reach his ears. "But!"
"But?" Owen asked, expectantly.
"It will be under my conditions, it will be YOUR dream, under MY conditions"
"I hear you".
"I don't want to get pregnant." Owen looked at her puzzled. "I want us to hire a surrogate."
"Okay". Owen answered more in a tone of question than affirmation.
"I have a demanding job; I can't afford to slow down for nine months, plus post-partum."
"But..."
"Yes, I know, I know Meredith and Teddy did it, but I'm not them, so those are my conditions."
After analyzing her proposal for a few seconds Owen took her face and kissed her hard. "I accept your conditions."
"Oh, and you'll have the night shift at least 4 days a week." Cristina said and then buried her head in his side again.
"I'll do what you want."
"Do you think Teddy and Henry would want to be our surrogates?"
"What?!" He chuckled.
"I mean, they make damn beautiful babies, if the baby doesn't inherit our talents let it be beautiful, being beautiful in life is always useful." Cristina answered, nonchalant.
"You are impossible!" Owen laughed and then trapped her again under his huge body. "I missed you so much".
"Me too, if you hadn't come looking for me, probably, only probably I would have."
"Thank God I came first... we'll make it work Cristina, you'll see.
"I know".
Fic named after the song "I Wish You Love" by Rachael Yamagata.
(*) Yes, I know that Owen has a sister, Meghan, but at the time I wrote this we didn't know about her existence, also I wanted to give this strong fraternal feeling between Owen and Teddy due to the lack of siblings on both sides.
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