Here Without You

Satara

July 7th, 2003

(I don't own anything. All chars. belong to ME and Joss. Song belongs to 3 Doors Down)

Willow sighed as she walked up the stairs to her room. It was getting harder every day just to get out of bed. It was getting harder just to wake up. Willow shook her head as she passed the closed door to Buffy's room. She hadn't come home till early in the morning again. Walking down the hall the last few steps she paused in front of her own room. Taking a deep breath, she slowly opened the door. Blinking back tears she entered the cold room, and sighed as she sat down on the bed. Everything was still the same, as…before. It felt like it had been forever since she had seen… Choking back a sob, Willow fell back against the bed and curled up around one of the pillows. She cried then. For the pillow still smelt of her. It wasn't fair, why did she have to leave, like that? After all they had been through, and everything that had happened, she had to be ripped away from her like that. One tiny piece of metal, and she was gone. Forever. Without meaning to, Willow fell into a deep sleep, the tears slowly stopping and drying on her face.

"Willow. Wake up sweetie." The red head slowly stirred as she came into consciousness. "Come on Willow, you've been asleep forever. The kids are starting to think you've died." Willow opened her eyes, and then blinked. Once, twice, and another for good measure. "Tara?" The blonde smiled as she bent down and gently kissed Willow. "I'm glad you remember my name, I mean, you were only screaming it last night." Willow blushed and then frowned, "I had the most weird dream, you were, were…gone. And I never got to say goodbye." Tara kissed her lover again, and then gave a small laugh, "Well, I'm not going anywhere, love, and neither are you. The kids decided they wanted to go see Xander and Anya. But they wanted to say bye before they left, hence the waking you up part." Willow nodded and gave a small 'oh' of recognition. Smiling she sat up and stretched, enjoying the feel of having Tara so close. She stood up off the bed and grabbed Tara's hand as they walked out of the room. "Willow, wake up, come on, there's an emergency." Willow frowned and grabbed on tighter to Tara's hand. "Did you hear that?" Tara gave her a smile before kissing her again. "Willow, come on! We need you up!" Willow disengaged from the kiss and frowned, "That. Someone's telling me to wake up. It sounds like Dawn." Tara gave her a weird look. "Dawn who, and sweetie are you ok?" Willow looked at Tara like she was crazy. "Dawn! Buffy's little sister? Remember?" Tara lifted her other hand to feel Willow's forehead for a fever. "Willow, are you feeling ok?" Willow was flabbergasted, and suddenly she felt a pull, from somewhere. "Willow! You have to wake up! Come on!" Willow grabbed on tighter to Tara's hand as she felt like she was being drawn up. "No Tara! Don't let me go! I don't want to go back!" Tara just smiled sadly and let go of Willow's hand. "No!! Tara! Tara!"

"Tara!!!!!" Willow bolted up from her bed, nearly smacking Dawn in the face. The younger girl quickly wrapped up her friend in a hug, gently rocking as Willow cried on her shoulder "It's gonna be ok, Will, everything's gonna be ok." Willow just cried.

Willow looked in the rearview mirror of her car as Sunnydale got smaller and smaller. She couldn't stay there anymore, not after everything. It just held too many painful memories. Too many. She opened a window and let the wind flow through her hair, closing her eyes for a millisecond, she imagined it was Tara's finger's running through her hair, like they had so many times. Wiping her eyes with the back of her hand, she refocused her eyes on the road, and the looked over at the passengers seat. Empty, as was expected. Closing her eyes again, she smiled as she felt a hand on her arm. Eyes, opened, she smiled again, when she let go of the wheel with one hand to grab the hand on her arm. "I love you, Tara" Se said as she looked over again. Tara smiled warmly at her and pointed back towards the road. "Eyes on the asphalt, baby. Don't want to get in an accident when we just started, right?" Willow nodded and turned back towards the road. Squeezing Tara's hand, she let go to put both hands on the wheel. "I don't ever want you to leave me Tara. Promise, we'll be together forever. Please?" Tara laughed and leaned over to gently kiss Willow on the cheek. "I promise Will, together forever. I love you." Willow smiled and then looked down at the dash. "I love you too, Tara." Looking over, her smile faded, and she gripped the wheel tighter. Empty. As was expected.

A hundred days have made me older
Since the last time that I saw your pretty face
A thousand lies have made me colder
And I don't think I can look at this the same

All the miles that separate
Disappear now when I'm dreamin' of your face
I'm here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind

I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight, there's only you and me.

The miles just keep rollin'
As the people leave their way to say hello
I've heard this life is overrated
But I hope that it gets better as we go.

I'm here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time

I'm here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl, there's only you and me.

Everything I know, and anywhere I go
It gets hard but it won't take away my love
And when the last one falls, when it's all said and done.
It gets hard but it won't take away my love

I'm here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time

I'm here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl, there's only you and me

- Satara