Hello again everyone! I'm back! I have this idea for a one shot and with permission from FourTrisHEA, I'm expanding on the idea of Tris telling Tobias about Will's death. So if you haven't already go check out FourTrisHEA's oneshot "Peace Serum & A Favor". I'll be posting it soon!
Ill be including the beginning of Chapter 6 of Insurgent, the morning after Tris goes to Tobias' room in Amity, with a couple minor changes. Obviously I'll be excluding the fight with Peter and the peace serum scene in the book. I know it's an iconic scene but in order to make my one shot work I have to exclude it.
That morning I wake up to the buzz of an electric razor. Tobias stands in front of the mirror, his head tilted so he can see the corner of his jaw.
I hug my knees covered by the sheets, and watch him.
"Good morning," he says. "How did you sleep?"
"Okay." I get up, and as he tilts his head back to address his chin with the razor, I wrap my arms around him, pressing my forehead to his back where the Dauntless tattoo peeks out from beneath his shirt.
"I should go get ready." I say after a while.
"I'll get you something to wear," he says.
He reenters the room a moment later and hands me the clothes.
"Thank you," I say softly as I stand on my tiptoes and peck him on the cheek. He smiles warmly at me.
I start walking towards the door but I pause before entering the hallway and turn back to him.
"Tobias?"
"Yeah?"
"When I come back, we need to talk. I know we have work to do, but this can't wait."
"Okay. Is everything alright?"
"No, but I promise I'll explain everything. I'll be back in a couple minutes."
"Okay." He says simply and I can tell he's worried but curious as to what I need to tell him. I walk down the hall to my room and change. All the while I'm thinking about how I'm going to tell him. I just hope he understands. I was definitely not cut out for Candor but I know I can't keep this from Tobias for long. I need to do it before it's too late.
I finish getting ready and walk back to his room. It feels like the longest walk I've ever taken. I enter and find him sitting on the edge of the bed waiting for me. I sit beside him, our knees touching. He takes his hands in mine.
"What's wrong?" He asks.
I sigh. "When I came here last night I didn't get to say everything I wanted to say. In reality I didn't necessarily come here just to cry over my parents' deaths. At least, it's not the only reason I am upset."
"What else are you upset about?"
"I need to tell you everything else that happened during the attack after we were captured and separated. It was my mom who saved me from being executed by Jeanine's guards. Afterwards we started making our way towards the safe house where my father and brother were, along with Marcus and other Abnegation." I pause and Tobias flinches slightly at the mention of Marcus. He'd obviously feel better had Marcus not been able to escape with us to Amity.
"Right before my mom was killed something unexpected happened that will likely haunt me for a long time."
"What happened?"
"I should've known there was a possibility that this could happen but with everything going on, I couldn't think straight. As we were rounding the corner of an alleyway, I came face to face with...Will."
At this point I can already feel my eyes start to water. Tobias squeezes my hand likely knowing what I'm about to say next.
"Naturally, with him being under the simulation, he immediately pointed his gun at me. Even though I knew he couldn't hear me, I tried calling out to him. He never got the chance to fire his gun before I raised mine and pulled the trigger."
By now silent tears are streaming down my face.
"Tris..." He starts softly, releasing my hand and wiping my tears.
"I didn't know what to do. I panicked. I never wanted to kill anyone that day, let alone one of my friends. And telling you won't even be the hardest part. If Christina is among the surviving Dauntless I'll have to tell her when we find them."
"Tris, I know you'd never intentionally hurt anyone. Will's death is not your fault. It's Jeanine's. I know you're wishing it was you that died and not your parents nor Will. That's what I love about you, Tris. You're the bravest person I know but you are just as selfless. You were willing to let me kill you while I was under the simulation. If that had happened I'd be feeling the same way you are now, if not worse. Christina will understand."
"How can you be so sure?"
"She might be a crazy Candor," He pauses and I laugh through my tears. "But she care about you. This whole situation is hard for everybody especially those who were under the serum but once she knows the circumstainces I'm confident she will forgive you."
"Do you forgive me?"
"There's nothing to forgive. I love you too much to be angry over something you couldn't control. I want you to be able to forgive yourself. None of this is your fault."
I smile a little and he gathers me in his arms. I hug him back tight like if I let go he will slip away and I will think this is all just a dream that he's not mad at me.
"I love you, Tris." He murmurs into my hair.
"I love you too." I whisper.
THE END
