The Wingman
Pairing: Zeke/Harper
Summary: Sometimes knowing the alien word for "soup" is just enough to impress the girl.
A/N: This one-shot is set following "Dad's Buggin' Out." It was a great episode for Zarper, but something was missing. Hope you enjoy it.

"This is probably the most disgusting thing I have ever seen in my entire life."

Harper Finkle covered her mouth, fighting the urge to be sick right there in the middle of the Waverly Sub Station. Her eyes glanced toward Justin Russo, begging him to save her from what she was witnessing.

He sat next to her, shoulders slumped and a pout displayed upon his lips. His father had destroyed his Lifetime Achievement Award trophy, so he had every reason to be upset. He caught Harper's stare - a normal one compared to those she used to give him - and shared a sympathetic expression.

"I know, it's gross," he agreed. He then let out a loud sigh, stretching himself out as he attempted to perk up. "But dad'll be back to normal in a few days and we can forget this whole giant bug thing ever happened."

Harper shook her head. "I've gotten used to that," she said, pointing to where Jerry was twitching about. Max had once again started flicking him, leaving the bug Russo stuck resting on the floor on his back, desperately trying to get up. "I was referring to that."

Justin's eyes followed the wave of Harper's hand, landing on his sister. Her face was covered in corn, a biscuit in one hand and a giant spoon in the other.

"What?" she asked, spitting corn out. She wasn't sure what she had done to gather their attention. She was simply enjoying her favorite meal.

"Yeah, she's never going to be back to normal," Justin told Harper, and the two of them shared a laugh.

"Was she ever normal to begin with?" Harper questioned, and the laughter erupted once again. Alex ignored it, but Harper and Justin were having fun with their teasing.

"Not really," Justin answered. His laughter died down, ending in a quiet sigh, and that was when he noticed the fingertip flashlight left on the table in front of him. "Zeke left his finger. Huh. I'll have to put it somewhere for him."

Harper's eyes grew wide. This was clearly her chance to get Zeke Beekerman alone. Her crush on him had grown, and she was finally growing enough confidence that she could talk to him and throw hints at him. This would just be another opportunity for her to do that.

"I can take it to him," she said excitedly, reaching over the table to grab it. "I'll be back in a little bit."

She was already standing up and halfway through the sub shop leaving only a blur of green. She had certainly dressed up for the banquet, but everyone expected nothing less from her.

"Wait, Harper," Justin said, eyebrows raised in confusion. "He left a while ago. He probably went home already. How are you going to get it to him?"

It seemed like such a difficult question, but it was one Harper was instantly ready to tackle.

"Oh please," she said, laughing in what she considered a cool-but-casual manner. "I know where he lives. All cheerleaders have to fill out emergency contact forms. I may have sneaked a peek at his." She paused, finding nothing creepy in her statement at all, but adding quickly, "You know, just in case he got hurt and I needed to contact someone quickly. I wouldn't want to waste time going through the forms."

She felt nothing else needed to be said, so she quickly exited the restaurant.

Justin was left with raised eyebrows and a quizzical expression upon his face. "Zeke's been getting weird phone calls lately. People calling and then hanging up without saying anything. You don't think..."

His only answer was a grunt from his sister.

"I don't want to know," Justin decided, and in that moment he decided to laugh about the situation. "You know, Harper's craziness - it's kind of funny, as long as it's not happening to me."

Alex understood that one so she nodded, waving her biscuit toward him. "Now you're starting to sound like me."

Justin's good mood had only lasted a moment. Now he was creeped out again.

Harper knew exactly how to get to Zeke's home. The truth was she had been around there before when she followed Justin and Zeke after school. That was when she was in her "Justin phase," but now the information proved to be more useful than she could've known at the time.

There was part of Harper that wished she could talk to a younger her and tell her to not waste her time on the oldest Russo. Alas, time travel was no possible - as far as she knew - and she had to accept that and continue to move on from her juvenile crush.

Her journey to his place took her through the park, but her journey was shorter than she expected when she noticed him sitting on the bench. He was feeding leftover biscuit pieces to a few birds that were still hanging out. It was close to dark but the birds weren't going to pay attention to whether or not the sun was out - not if free food was involved.

To any other spectator it would appear as if Zeke Beekerman was having the time of his life, laughing every so often when one bird would steal a piece from in front of another one. He would then reprimand them, telling them they should share.

Harper Finkle, however, knew that there was something off in his demeanor. Typically Zeke would be ten times more excited than he currently was. These few laughs and a couple of smiles were practically the equivalent of frowns and a few tears, at least when converting from normal person behavior to the Zeke scale.

The younger girl approached him carefully, trying to avoid startling him or the birds. She coughed once, as if giving him a warning sign she was there, before taking a seat on the bench next to him.

"We feed Max like that sometimes," Harper said randomly, a smile on her face as she watched two birds peck at the ground then fly off. "He has this weird thing about birds. He's a bit strange sometimes."

Zeke sat straight up, swallowing a lump in his throat. He suddenly felt nervous and tense, eyes scanning back and forth at the birds. What was she doing here? Did she come to yell at him? Or, even more frightening, call him cute some more?

It wasn't that he didn't like her. It was just awkward to receive any sort of attention from a girl, especially one he liked. He was more used to girls liking Justin. He was sure Harper was clumped in with those girls, too.

"What are you doing here?" Zeke asked, though he managed to say it in a more friendly manner than most. Still, he didn't want to scare her off like the birds that had just left, so he continued. "What I mean is..." What did he mean? "Hey, Harper. What's up?"

Harper didn't say anything, instead reaching out to take a hold of his hand. She opened his palm, taking out the quarter of a biscuit that was left and replacing it with his finger light.

"Oh hey! I was wondering what happened to this!" Zeke was now grinning from ear to ear, placing the light upon his finger. He was so happy he forgot to be nervous. "Thanks for bringing it to me!"

Harper's smile was just as big as Zeke's, her eyes bright as she watched him flick the light on. "You're welcome!" She tossed the biscuit out in front of them, watching as the last bird attacked it. She had seen Max do that before, too. She nervously brushed her hands together, attempting to get rid of the crumbs without getting them on her alien-themed dress. "I just figured you couldn't go home without it."

He nodded, using the finger to gently tap her nose. "Thanks," he said again, and as his eyes locked hers, he felt those nerves and that fear come back. His eyes widened, and he quickly turned to sit straight forward, hands clasped on his lap. He didn't know why he had just tapped her nose but he suddenly felt like he shouldn't have done that.

Harper just laughed quietly to herself, her hand raising to touch where he had just tapped. It was cute, and sort of sweet in a weird kind of way. It summed up her feelings about Zeke Beekerman perfectly.

"What's up?" she asked him after a moment of silence, nudging him gently in the side with her elbow. "And don't say nothing 'cause I like to think I know you better than that. You seem...a bit down. I mean, you're hanging out in a park by yourself feeding gross birds. I'm no expert on good moods but I was pretty sure happy people didn't do that."

Zeke didn't expect those words to come from the redhaired girl's lips, so the surprised look on his face made perfect sense. How had she known? He didn't think he looked sad or angry or in any sort of mood. Clearly his acting was not up to par with her. He tried to change the subject, raising his lighted finger to point in his own defense.

"You're here hanging out in a park and you just fed gross birds," he said, nodding in an almost-frantic manner. "Are you going to tell me you're not happy?"

Harper shook her head no, her fingertip gently touching his. "Nope," she said, smile pulling onto her lips. "I'm very happy, actually, but that's 'cause I'm not alone. I'm here with you."

Zeke looked so cute when he ran out of words, Harper decided as the senior opened his mouth to speak, closed it, then opened his mouth again.

Harper scrunched her nose, trying to keep from giggling to herself. Instead she would try to take a crack at what was bothering him, or at least convince him to tell her himself.

"You sure knew a lot facts about those aliens," she said. She looked genuinely interested and Zeke seemed to perk up as he nodded his head. "You spend a lot of time reading about that stuff, right?"

"Oh yeah, tons," Zeke answered. "I read anything I can get my hands on. There is a ton of stuff that's just theories online right now, just from blogs of casual fans, but if you cross-reference it with actual books and facts you can find a lot of truth in even the smallest theories. I think a lot of people overlook that but I figure all information has to start somewhere."

Zeke realized how dorky he sounded, but he considered the fact that Harper still looked interested and wasn't running away to be a good sign. Sure, she had joined the Alien Language League, but Zeke figured it was just to hang out with Justin.

She'd done pretty good with learning some of the basic lingo, though, and her outfit had made him a bit weak in the knees. He had to admit it - he loved girls in green.

Harper watched as he suddenly got shy, sneakers digging into the grass below him, his eyes fixated on a dirt patch a few feet in front of them.

"You know..." Harper began, and Zeke slowly turned to look at her as she spoke. It was rude not to. "I like Justin and all, but I'm kind of surprised you didn't get the award tonight."

"Yeah?" Zeke seemed genuinely surprised by her statement. Since they started planning the banquet all Zeke had heard was how Justin was sure to take it home. Justin had never even considered Zeke might be a candidate.

"Yeah." Harper bit nervously on her lip, eyes locked on his. It was weird, looking into his eyes. They weren't as vibrant as Justin's, but they made her feel weaker than his ever had. They also showed a bit of sadness - a sadness Harper could relate to. "That's what's bothering you, right? You wanted it, didn't you?"

Zeke didn't say anything at first, considering her questions carefully. He had spent the past few years playing wingman to Justin. Justin was on the team and Zeke was cheering from the sides. Justin won the election and, while Zeke had come close, Zeke had accepted that was how things were meant to be. It was obvious Justin was meant to win this one, too.

But he had wanted it.

"I put a lot into that club," Zeke told her quietly. Harper had to lean a bit closer to even hear his words. She'd never heard him speak this low. Even his whisper was loud enough for people in the next room to hear. "I guess I thought maybe I'd be considered for it, you know? I'm graduating, too. Maybe I want my moment, too." He shrugged his shoulders, forcing a big smile onto his lips. "You're a pretty good therapist, you know that?"

Harper had heard this before.

"That's what my mom would say every time she'd tell me about all of the hopes and dreams she had before she married my father," Harper answered with a nod, a small smile pulling at the corner of her lips. "You know, I'd have a lot of money saved up if I started charging her for those sessions."

Zeke's eyes widened. "You're not gonna charge me, right?" He was kidding. That much was obvious when he started to laugh, and Harper joined in. Her hand reached over to touch his knee, and though it startled Zeke, he didn't flinch quite as much as he had before. It felt kind of nice, really.

"Can I tell you something about Justin?" Harper asked, her quiet tone indicating that, while they were having a nice laugh together, she needed to get this out. He nodded, unsure of where she was going with this but willing to listen.

"Justin's a great guy. He's good at almost everything he does...and he knows it. Sometimes he takes his knowledge of it a bit far, you know? Things have to be just right for him. He thinks he's entitled to this, or he deserves that because he worked harder than anyone else. He's got his success-blinders on, so he doesn't see the guy next to him working twice as hard."

The words floated into Zeke's ears, sinking in with a thud. "Is...is that guy me?" Harper simply nodded. "But...isn't that why you like him so much? 'Cause he's so good at everything and all?"

Harper was surprised by his words - not necessarily what he said, but the way he said it. She swore there was a hint of jealousy in his voice, one he would never admit to. She understood it. Zeke Beekerman was loyal to Justin. He would support him through the good and the bad with a smile on his face. Harper knew how that went - she did the same thing for Alex.

"I gave up on Justin a while ago," she admitted, her hands raising to brush her loose curls behind her ears. "I mean, I like him. He's my friend and I'd be lost without him in my life, but we're not...compatible."

"How come?" Zeke didn't realize how interested he was in hearing this until he heard the words leave his mouth.

She thought it over for a minute, her eyes focused on anything but Zeke. She hadn't really talked about this with anyone, but she felt like he wouldn't judge her for it. Maybe he'd even understand.

"Justin's nice, but he's never going to feel about me the way I felt about him." She paused, hoping that he picked up on the past tense. There was nothing more awkward than telling your current crush about the details of your past crush, and the fact that they were best friends made it more awkward. She took a deep breath, finally allowing her eyes to lock with his.

"I want someone who's as excited to hang out with me as I am to hang out with him." And then Harper smiled. She wasn't sure why, but something in his eyes made her want to smile.

"You know," Zeke replied, hunched over a bit as he bumped his shoulder into hers, "I'm easily excited."

She nodded, her hand raising to cover her heart. Her heart was beating faster than she knew it was possible. She took a deep breath, forcing herself to ask him: "But even if you weren't?"

He was feeling more comfortable with her since she had gotten him to open up. In fact, he was genuinely enjoying their time together, and his mood had certainly improved.

"I'd still be excited to hang out with you," he promised.

The two sat in silence, casually making eye contact then shyly looking away, only to repeat the process. Neither was sure what their exchange had meant, but both felt the promise and excitement in the words they had whispered as the sun went down.

"I guess I should probably go," Harper finally said, pushing herself up from the bench. Her hands straightened her dress, then fixed the eyeball headband she'd been wearing this whole time. Harper never felt uncomfortable going out dressed a little differently than everyone else.

"Yeah, same here." Zeke stood too, slipping his finger light into his pocket. "I'll see you later?"

She nodded, and the two started off in opposite directions.

Harper, however, turned back around, unable to fight the feeling that something was left undone. "Zeke," she called after him.

He turned around, and she quickly moved to fill the space between them.

"I'm really sorry you didn't get the award," she told him honestly. Her hand reached out to touch his arm, and she stood on her tiptoes to place a kiss to his cheek. "I'll see you around."

And she walked off, a smile on her lips as she walked quickly through the park.

Zeke was left stunned for a moment, his hand raising to touch the spot where her lips had brushed. He hadn't won the award he had wanted, but somehow it didn't bother him anymore.

After all, the light green lip print left upon his cheek was better than a giant trophy anyday.