"Oh when you look at me like that my darling, what did you expect?
I'd probably still adore you with your hands around my neck."
~ Arctic Monkeys - 505
Summary
While getting ready for yet another charity gala, Loki experiences a flashback and Tony suffers for it.
Loki looked at his reflection and sneered, his regal Asgardian armour had been replaced with a Midgardian ensemble of suit and tie. The black suit was obviously tailored to fit and clung to all the right places if Tony's wondering gaze was anything to go by; and experience told him it was. Almost reminiscent of his 'Stuutgard' outfit but, not quite.
No I doubt Stark wants to be reminded of that
Even if Tony didn't blame him, even if Tony was the only one who knew about Thanos' torture: of the constant agonising heat that seeped into every pore and almost burned him alive. Barely being able to stand from the vertigo; for fear of the nausea escalating into throwing up the tiny amount of food in his stomach. Not being able to think clearly through the permanent dizzy spell to plan an escape or gather enough energy to end the pain.
The eternal fall and loneliness had been enough to smack, push and kick Loki into the realm of mental instability and his capture had been 'the straw that broke the camels back'.
Until he screamed and screamed and screamed for them to stop, that he agreed, that the tesseract was theirs and he would do the dirty work.
"-ki?"
A hand entwined with his own and shocked him out of his flashback.
Loki spun and instinctively rammed the body into the nearest wall with a tight grasp around the neck.
Tony gasped but stayed deadly still; he never forgot that Loki was a God, one wrong move, one little squeeze and he could be dealing with a crushed windpipe for months. In hindsight reaching out for someone midflashback (especially incredibly strong Gods) was not an idea that was likely to benefit his own health but he knew what it was like, when a memory dug its claws into you and every sense drowned in it and there was no way he was going to leave anybody in the state: let alone Loki. So he'd called and waved his hand in front of unseeing green eyes but when Loki started screaming he couldn't resist the urge to physically comfort him.
The hand around his neck pushed him further into the wall and Loki's usually focused gaze was replaced with darting pupils and oh this was bad, this was full on panic mode and Loki could snap his neck with a flick of his wrist and not realise until he'd calmed down.
He couldn't get a word past his constricted throat so Tony carefully squeezed the hand that wasn't restricting his airway. The gentle touch got through to Loki and Tony was immediately released and slid down the wall gasping for air.
"Stark!" Loki looked between him and his hands in almost disbelief, still hyperventilating and shaking. "Tony I-" The proud God moved to sit beside him on the floor and Tony gripped his hand without hesitation.
"It's OK, you're OK, that's all I wanted." And Tony flashed him a true smile with white teeth and eyes that radiated love, only Tony Stark would do something so dangerous and destructive for someone and never consider the consequences it would have on him.
And as they both sat against their bedroom wall, hours late for the charity gala Pepper had wanted them at, and hands locked together, Loki wondered what he'd ever done to deserve Anthony Edward Stark.