Do you remember feeling invincible?
Nico still occasionally woke up feeling that he should be in the Lotus Casino, where he remembered thinking that he and his sister were inseparable he never thought that one of them could die. How could he? He was only 12.
When there was trouble it was us against the world
It was always just them. The only childhood memories he had were of his sister, and when they got out of Lotus Casino they had to face the swarms of pure adolescence. They were often made fun of because they were orphans (half of those people would run like a Cyclops was on their ass if they knew who his dad really was). And the teachers didn't treat them any differently than the students. So they had each other.
Can you save me now?
She left him for crying out loud. Purposely. Turned to the Hunters. Was there something he could have done to stop her?
I get lost up in the clouds
He was always the kid that had a mind were everything was magical and happy. As long as Bianca was with him, everything was okay.
Save me now
When he found out that Percy was trying to go on the mission as his sister he made him promise. Promise that he would make sure that his sister wouldn't die. It was a promise that he never should have made and one that Nico wished that he had never asked.
You were my gravity
She was the center of his universe.
She never should have left him.
Percy should have made good on his promise.
Now my world is shattering
He remembered being told that his sister had died.
He remembered the feeling the day that she had actually died. The horrible buzzing in his ears.
He remembered the doubt that his hero had broken his promise.
A part of him still felt the sting of the broken promise.
I was the moon, you were the sun
I can't seem to shine now that you're gone
He didn't realize how much he needed her until she was gone.
Now I'm out of orbit cause you left without warning
Demigods died young. He knew this. It was something that was in the orientation video.
He never thought it would happen to Bianca. That she would be one of those numbers.
Are you somewhere better now?
She left him for the third time when she went for rebirth. He hoped that she was living in the top one percent of the population getting everything she ever wanted. Because that's what she deserved. Less than she deserved, now that he thought about it. She deserved something that this world could never give.
When the ground drops out I get lost in the clouds
He resented her at the same time.
Who was there to support him when he was figuring out that he was gay?
For a little while he thought she would hate him if she knew the truth.
When you went away, thought I'd never be the same
He wasn't the same as the time that they were together.
Would the nightmare ever end?
Not all the changes where for the better.
And there were something's that he wished she were there to support him for:
When he got out of the godsdamned jar, after being in Tartarus.
When he had to confess to Eros that he was gay.
It would have been nice to know that somebody was in his corner.
If I could do it again I wouldn't change a thing 'cause it's made me who I am
But after he grabbed Hazel from the Underworld, he realized something.
Even though he wants his sister back,
He doesn't need her anymore.
They had memories.
And sometimes it wasn't worth it to try and go back to those days.
He needed the experience of losing her. It made him stronger, as cliché as that sounds. He needed those days of darkness.
He still wants her back, but not enough to force back into the world of gods.
You were my gravity
Maybe one day, her death would be something that hit him so hard every day when he woke up that he forgot how to breathe.
He hoped the others wouldn't leave him too.