I know many of you are waiting for the next chapter of "of bets and bedtimes" but I just kinda had this idea! Also I don't own FMA. Warning utter crud!
Disclaimer: don't own FMA
Summary: Ed is asleep and the subordinates do stuff to him.
Pairing: parental Riza Ed
It was a relatively normal day at Central HQ and Mustang and his crew were rather bored. You see Hawkeye had left at lunch to go to the doctor to get the mandatory flue shot provided by the military, thus leaving Roy and the rest to lounge around like the lazy bums they are. This is where our story begins.
Havoc was resting his head in his palms while he watched Breda and Fury play paper football. He enjoyed peaceful days like this but he wouldn't mind a bit of excitement, things were getting boring. His payers were answered when he heard the sound of loud clanking footsteps. That could only mean one thing, the Fullmetal midget was back in town. Ten minutes later the large suit of armor that was Alphonse Elric walked into the room.
"Hey Al how've you been?" asked fury.
"Okay but I wish I could say the same for brother." He said, "He caught a nasty case of that flu that's been going around." It was then that Havoc noticed Ed fast asleep on his brother's back. Al noticed Havoc's gaze and turned to him.
"Hey Havoc, would you mind watching brother while I go get his prescription from the hospital." Havoc was about to refuse but then he thought of all the fun that could be had with a defenseless sleeping Edward in his possession. (It's not what you're hoping for fan girls! Sorry!) He immediately agreed.
"Sure Al you take your time. I'm sure he'll be awake by the time you get back!" Havoc said with an evil grin.
"Oh okay!" Al said brightly, "I'll be back soon!" and with that he left. Havoc resumed his evil smirking and rubbed his hands together mischievously. Fuery looked worried.
"Havoc," he said nervously "what are you going to do?"
"I'm gonna get him back for being a brat to us all these years. And you all are going to help me!" he said turning to the rest of mustang's staff "I have the perfect punishment in mind! Fuery go get an extra uniform out of your locker!"
"O-okay, but what are you going to do with that?" Fuery questioned.
"We're going to give him a military makeover!" Havoc said happily. Everyone looked at him.
Breda: "I'm in."
Farman: "Me too."
Fuery: "you got it!"
So Fuery went off and got his extra uniform while the others laid Ed out on the couch and began to strip him of his clothes until he was left in his black tank top and boxers. When Fuery returned, they put him in the uniform. It was at this point that Mustang decided to come out of his office to get some coffee.
"What the hell is going on here?!" Roy asked when he spotted his subordinates huddled over the sleeping form of a military-blue clad Fullmetal.
"W-we were j-just getting back at Ed for all the times he was a brat to us." Fuery said nervously.
"HOW DARE YOU PULL A PRANK ON FULLMETAL WHEN HE IS ASLEEP," the colonel yelled while his squad coward in fear. "AND NOT INVITE ME TO HELP!!" The subordinates looked at each other and breathed a collective sigh of relief.
"Well I actually think we finished but you can check our work if you want," Havoc said stepping out of the way so Mustang could see. Roy took one look at Ed and began to chuckle.
"Well Havoc I have to say you did a good job but you're missing one crucial detail. Don't worry though I know exactly what to do!" he said happily, "Put him in a chair and tie him to it so he won't fall over. I'll be back in a second!" he walked into his office again. The subordinates looked at each other and shrugged, then placed Ed in a wooden chair and tied him up. Seconds later Roy emerged from his office holding a pair of scissors.
"What are you going to do with those sir?" asked Fuery nervously.
"Just wait and watch Fuery and you'll see." Mustang said as he approached the back of the sleeping Elric. He grabbed Ed's perfectly done braid and placed the scissors at the nape of his neck. Then, in one fluid motion, he snipped off Ed's precious braid. (A/N little did they know just how precious it really was to him, but we'll get into that later!) Every one in the room gaped at what Mustang had just done. But Roy was not finished yet. After depositing the severed braid into a near by trash bin. He stepped in front of Ed and began to trim his bangs until they were short and spiky. He then clipped away at the back and sides until his hair was an expectable military length. (A/N think of Ed's hair when he first went through the gate.) Then he patted the clipped hair off of Ed's shoulders. He then began to untie his small subordinate. Ed chose this moment to start to wake up.
"Uh….What's goin on….where am I?" he muttered sleepily. His eyes fluttered open and he rubbed the sleep out of them. It was then that he heard the chuckles coming from across the room. He looked up and saw Fuery, Farman, and Breda giggling behind their hands and Mustang and Havoc outright laughing.
"How'd I get here? What's so funny?" he mumbled still groggy from sleep.
"You are twerp!" Havoc exclaimed. He went over to Ed and hoisted him up by his shoulders and steered him towards a closet with a full length mirror hanging on it. "See look" Havoc said making Ed look up.
All sleep was immediately gone from Edward. A look of total shock and horror crossed his face. He reached out and touched the mirror cautiously, then jerked his hand back in terror when he found the image to be a reality. He whipped his head around to face Havoc.
"W-why?" he asked shakily.
"Because it was funny." Havoc said with a giggle. Ed's face became filed with rage. He punched Havoc square in the face, making him fly a god six feet across the room. When he landed his nose was bleeding.
"What the hell was that for?!" the lieutenant yelled.
"Fullmetal that was completely unnecessary!" Mustang scolded.
"Oh really Colonel?" Ed asked body trembling and voice cracking "I think it was perfectly necessary. I think I should punch you all in the face for what you did…what you did to me!" Ed bowed his head and a steady stream of tears began to run down his face. Everyone in the office was shocked, Ed never cried. Especially not in public.
"I-I promised Al I w-wouldn't c-cut my h-hair until he g-got his b-body b-back." Ed said trying to contain his sobs.
"NOW YOU ALL HAVE BROKEN A PROMISE I MADE TO THE ONLY FAMILY MEMBER I HAVE LEFT!" He screamed at them, clearly hurt.
"And my m-mom," he said getting even more upset. "She always w-wanted me to h-have long hair." He wiped his eyes and nose on his uniform sleeve. "I h-hope you're all g-god d-dam happy with yourselves! Y-you took away one of the few things I h-had l-left to remember her b-by!" It occurred then to Mustang just how much truth there was to those words. Every time he saw the young Elric his hair was always neat and clean even if the rest of him wasn't. He felt terrible.
Ed suddenly began to cough. He fell to his knees and broke down. He alternated between coughing and sobbing. It was like his world was coming to an end. The officers just stood there and stared. They had no idea what to do. There was only one thing on their minds, how had one little prank turn into a possible life wrecking incident for poor Edward?
Just then, Al and Riza returned from the hospital. Ed looked up at his brother, his face was red and rivers of tears ran down his cheeks.
"ALLL….ALLL," he sobbed stretching out his arms too his brother in a pleading manner.
"OH MY GOSH, EDWARD!!" Alphonse cried as he rushed over to Ed. Riza took one look at the two boys huddled together on the floor and then at the men staring across the room. A look of pure fury crossed her face. Shot at the officers angrily, narrowly missing their skin.
"WHAT THE HELL IS THE MATTER WITH YOU?!" she screamed, "AS IF WHAT THESE BOYS HAVE GONE THREW ISN'T ENOUGH, YOU IDIOTS HAVE TO GO AND PULL SOMETHING LIKE THIS! NOT ONLY IS EDWARD SICK AND EXHAUSTED BUT NOW HE'S PROBABLY SCARRED FOR LIFE!! FRANKLY I'M ASHAMED OF ALL OF YOU! ESPECIALLY YOU COLONEL, YOU SHOULD KNOW BETTER! WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING?!" she turned to look at the boys. Edward was frantically trying to find comfort from his brother but it was exceedingly difficult considering Al was made of metal.
"Al I'm so sorry…I'm soooo, soooooo, sorry!" he sobbed while Al tried to no avail to consol him. Riza's frown deepened.
"Al was just asking if he and Ed could stay at my house until he got better." Riza stated to the Colonel. "I am taking both Elrics into my care until I say otherwise. Also Ed will be out for a week on sick leave." With that she turned to the boys. She knelt down beside Edward and pulled him into her embrace.
"Hush little one," she said soothingly, "everything's going to be alright." Ed buried his face in her shoulder and whimpered. Riza rubbed the back of his head and stood up. She carried the still weeping Edward to the door with Alphonse in tow. She turned to look at the rest of the squad.
"Good day." She stated flatly. She left the office with the two boys, slamming the door behind her. The men sighed and looked at each other.
"She was really angry." said Fuery.
"Can you really blame her?" asked havoc.
"We have to figure out a way to make it up to her and to Edward." Mustang said.
"Yeah" they all sighed. And with that they all started thinking of ways to make it up to Riza and Edward.
Well that's all for now. I could continue this if you want but it's up to you. Please review if you want to know what happens next. PANCAKES FOR REVIEWERS!! :3