Torn Creature
a Smallville fanfiction written by Calliope Sylvers51
Running away was something that Clark Kent had thought about plenty of times, but never actually considered doing it. There are things that lie deep inside dark boxes and everyone is to afraid to open them to find the secrets but once it is opened, whatever beast lies inside cannot be safely tucked underneath the lid. Once something powerful is unleashed, it tends to be uncontrollable. Not always, of course. Not when it can control itself. But that is rare; yes, it is rare for someone to defy who they are…to betray their flesh and family and become something that is unnatural at least in terms of how they were raised to be. It truly is, I guess, in the eye of the beholder, because what was normal for one person in one culture certainly would not be normal for a different kind of person in a different kind of culture. Clark knew he was different and he knew where he come from but he didn't really know any of his own people so in reality he just saw himself as one of the Kents, the son of a farmer and a teenager painfully in love who carries too many dark secrets to be allowed to be in love. Genetically he was Kryptonian but emotionally he was just a human who just finished his sophomore year in high school and who just happened to save the life of the beautiful Lana Lang more times than he could count.
Okay, so he didn't want to go, but he had to because he didn't want to hurt anyone. He had tried to stop it. He destroyed the ship. But that just made the problem worse. Destroying the ship couldn't ever really destroy Jor-El because Jor-El had died years ago.
'We all have certain genes', Lex had said. 'that no matter how hard we try to avoid it, dominate us.'
Clark didn't want to believe it. He never completely trusted Lex but he tried to. Lex was a Luther so it was natural that he had ambitions. It was natural that he had secrets. But Clark had secrets too and he was pretty sure the Luthers were curious. That was one of the reasons Clark had to leave. Clark cared about Lex, but emotions were his weakness. His friendship with Lex would inevitably destroy him. Lex would get into some scary predicament, Clark would run to his rescue, and correspondedly one of the Luthers – father or son – would find out Clark's secret, and sell it. What would the state do if it knew? Lock him up and experiment on him? Or worse, the bad guys could get a hold of him. Use him as a weapon. Force him to become an assassin. No. Clark would never let that happen.
Clark ran to the Torch to search for the red kryptonite ring Chloe had. He threw papers on the floor. He used his x-ray vision. It had to be there somewhere. It had to. Pete ran in and told him that he didn't have to do this; that this wasn't the way, but Clark knew better. He looked around and then he saw it. A small jewelry box under Chloe's desk. This had to be it. He looked at it. He was about to open it and Pete warned him that he wouldn't be himself but Clark liked the way it made him feel and right now he needed to escape how much he felt like his father hated him and he had to escape how guilty he felt and that his mother lost her baby and that he would never be a big brother and that if he ever told Lana who he really was she would hate him because oh yeah he killed her parents even if he was a baby and by the way someone would probably try to hurt Lana if she knew.
"Where are you going to go?" Pete asked.
"I don't know," Clark said. And that wasn't really a lie. He didn't really know where he would go. He would go off on the motorcycle and have some fun. Maybe go to a club and drown in someone else's sorrow. And then he would go where exiles go. He would go where outsiders go. He would go where no one would ever think to look for him, and start a life for himself there, alone, in exile. Maybe one day he would come back. Secretly, maybe. Maybe he did have a destiny. Maybe. But he didn't know yet, and he didn't know where he was going to go.
Clark ran back to his house at approximately the speed of sound and grabbed his motorcycle and a torn leather jacket and right when he was about to speed away he saw Lana.
"Lana."
"Clark. What are you doing?"
"I love you Lana, more than you'll ever know, but I have to go. For the sake of everyone."
"Don't go……………..I need you. Your mom needs you. Chloe needs you. You don't know how much I love you…"
At that moment there was an ethereal quality to Lana's face, and she was more beautiful than any angel. Her dark hair looked so soft and her eyes were wide and innocent. Her eyes were a mysterious kaleidoscope, and Clark was sucked right in. Clark leaned into Lana's lips and he kissed her. There was something so innocent and beautiful about this last kiss no matter how lustful and dark and passionate it was. It lasted for almost a minute and then Clark broke away and whispered, "Come with me."
Lana shook her head. "No…I can't. Smallville is my home, Clark. It's your home too."
With sudden resolution, Clark pulled the red kryptonite ring out of his pocket and put it on his finger. "Not anymore." Clark sped off on the motorcycle. Some dust from the ground flew up and hit Lana in the face, but she didn't care. She brushed her hair out of her face and she stared at Clark as he left and she felt that she lost the only thing that ever really mattered to her and she knew that if he didn't come back soon she would have to go off searching for him.
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Clark rode on with resolute abandon. The red kryptonite had already spread throughout his blood stream and had become a part of him. In a sense, he was the red kryptonite. It became him, and he became it. He let it flow through his veins and then he let all of his pain fall aside and the dust the motorcycle left behind washed away all of his guilt and fear and love. Love was the hardest emotion to watch away. But Clark knew that love was dangerous. Jor-El was right, in a way. Because Clark was really Kal-El, and even though he loved his family and he loved Lana and Chloe and Pete and Lex he knew he would always be different and he would always be dangerous and besides he had a Destiny to follow. His biological father had wanted him to take over Earth. But Clark had other plans. He would find a way to save Earth. There were victims everywhere because there was evil everywhere. Evil was not the only force that made people kill. Evil was not the only force that created monsters – torn creatures, twisted in the flesh so that they are desperate and beyond saving by any means. How was Clark to save someone like that? Who would be there to save the torn creatures?
Like the meteor freaks, for instance. They couldn't control whatever ability they had as a result of the chemical impact of the meteor rocks. It was Clark's fault. Yeah, he was a baby and he had had no control of the situation, but because of his race of people, there were torn creatures that were not accepted in society. Mental institutions could never really save them. Because what they are, what they have become, is something that only an insane person could ever believe to be real. No person with any kind of position of authority would believe their stories. The stories of the torn creatures would remain untold.
And eventually the torn creatures would have to be destroyed, because the whole world can not sacrifice itself just for the torn creatures by willingly becoming victims. A world of victims would never survive.
There would always be people who prey on the week. Sometimes because of some evil hatred or malcontent, but usually either because of mental derangement or some twisted form of necessity. That was why Clark knew it would be hard to play the role of the superhero. You have to kill to save. You try to save everyone, even the bad guys, but then the bad guys come back for more blood and the next time they might be successful.
Clark went into a club and decided to let loose everything; just be himself. After all, why shouldn't he be able to? Why did secrets have to control his life?
The music was blaring, but to Clark's ears it wasn't really that loud. Clark stood at the back wall and even though he was wearing the red kryptonite ring he still didn't feel like dancing or hooking up. He kind of felt like showing off his powers but really that was just too unnecessary so he didn't. He was actually quite bored out of his mind.
Clark didn't know why he was hanging out in a club. He kind of felt pathetic. None of the girls were even hot. They didn't even compare to Lana and Chloe. Clark sighed. He was about to leave when the door opened. A bunch of bad looking boys walked in and started attacking a skimpily dressed girl. Clark sighed and ran to the rescue once again. He used super speed to catch the bastard, super strength to move the slutty girl out of the bastard's way, and fire from the eyes just for kicks…to annoy the hell out of the bastard to show him that it wasn't his place to humiliate and destroy people who didn't know better. Clark stomped his foot and sped out of the blasted place before anyone saw him.
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Clark supersped to the desert in New Mexico. He stood in the sandy, deserted land, thinking about how vast the area was. How could no one see the beauty in it? How? What is it about sandy hills and stones that made Clark feel so at home? Clark loved the heat. He breathed in some of the dust and thought about Lana. And he smiled, because there was no kryptonite here. He was done being a superhero, for now. What he didn't know was, he wasn't the only one here. People were watching him, and what he didn't know is that he would end up having to save a torn little girl from herself. Would he understand her? Would he understand her pain? The red will sink in. He doesn't really know what it's like to be different.
TO BE CONTINUED………………dun dun dun dun….