Disclaimer (s) :

I do not own the rights to Digimon, or characters related or existing through the digimon series.

(I also do not own the lyrics to the song(s): )

"A tout le monde" by Megadeth,

"Crawling" by Linkin Park,

I'm just using them to present a fashion to co-mingle a story for you, the reader. Enjoy nn!

Summary : Tai and his sister live in what Pink ( The pop singer/hiphop artist) would call a world war three. His family fights constantly and usually always. Who will help Tai stay sane? His best freinds? His sister? Will his 'parents' split up, like his mom did with his real dad?

... Don't remember where I was, realized life was a game...

Tai woke up, to the sound of a monotonous beep which was emitted from a small box, that seemed to read six thirty. He freed one of his covered arms, which was trapped underneath the blankets of confinement, and rolled over on his still covered arm and swung his free hand to attempt and hit the snooze button located on the alarm clock. ' Sweet', thought Tai as he was now unable to hear the alarm declare it's war call for another new day.

Tai groggily pulled the covers off his tired body. He was quite tired, especially for being a 18 year old, chocolate spiked hair boy, who actually went to bed on time. He had work at eight in the morning. He looked back over at the clock., it was now a quarter to seven. He went over to his cheaply finished chestnut wood dresser, with the grains of the wood still sticking out, causing many rigorous bumps. He opened the first one, and took out a fresh pair of white ankle socks and green patterned boxers. Next he went to the drawer below and opened it to reveal a sore sight of mixed feelings. He stared down at the petite object. It was very shiny, as its body mainly consisted of metal. He reached down and picked up the handled object.

... I had no idea what it'd cost, my life flashed before my eyes...

He examined most of the aspects of the handled object. He flipped it open and felt the edge of the object. It was sharp enough, as he looked down at it and jerked his thumb back as he ran it over the blade. Blood quickly oozed through the now newly created escape hole, that helped the red limited liquid with in him. Tai quickly snapped out of a firm star gazing hypnotizing and put the knife back in the drawer, and took a brown pair of shorts and a jersey meshed T - shirt, and grabbed his goggles and wristbands and walked out of his room and into the bathroom to take a shower.

As he entered the shower, he noticed that everyone was up and getting ready for another day in a world where everything seem to repeat itself, just one difference separated each day, the where another day. They all sat in the kitchen table, eating what seemed to be the usual sugar coated cereals on television. Ta finally closed the door and stripped off his clothes and started up the water for a shower, and looked down at his solemn wrist.

Scars of a past he once chose over his own life.

... Discomfort, endlessly has pulled it self against me, distracting, reacting...

He stared as he just got lost in the moment. he stared again and flash backs of the past came and jolted in his head. He had wished that he had never succumbed to this mental illness. It almost always consumes him of everything he is, and on many occasions threatening his very life. "I can't cry here. I'm strong. I'm a group leader, not a second hand pushover..." mumbled Tai to himself, as he looked away and climbed away into the shower with a rather noticeable frown.

He finished several minutes after he started. Tai was never takes a lot of time to do and get things done. Plus, Tai was always strong willed when it came to getting stuff done, if he didn't let it bother him. That was his only weakness, which is probably why he was the group leader back at summer camp, when they were in the digital world. But times of fun and excitement of the past are over, and now he's dealing with the real world. He misses Agumon. He used to tell his orange fossilized friend almost and paretically everything that was on his mind. But those days were over now. Gone. Now it's time to deal with reality and its evil villains, and his own world as well. He didn't like telling his sister, who was Kari, his mom or dad, his best friends, Yamato, Sora or Daisuke. He would hide behind a person of false leadership, and claim that everything is al right, instead of telling his problems from eating and chewing himself out.

He got dressed and put on the many necessities that seemed to define who Taichi Yagami really was. Old spice cologne and Old spice deodorant, and Göt2B spiking glue gel. As he began to spike his hair, he noticed that his hair was really disorganised and messy, but he finally clued in. That was his style. It was normal, because it was always was a messy type style, which was followed by the hair dryer. Usually, Tai noticed, that the effect of the glue gel and heat, hardened with in seconds. He forgot to put on his goggles, but then remembered that he didn't want to get the stuff in his hair on his only prized possession; his stylish goggles his only one.

Tai hid his fears from his friends, which also led to him hiding his problem. But one thing Tai made clear, he was a terrific actor. He always acted like the gun ho hero who was willing to dive in problems, head first. That was real Tai, not a scared, hurt and sissy Tai. But he held that pain in him for so long that it was starting to meet him face to face, as he was destined to meet him...

Finally his concentration was broke as he heard the front door open and slammed it shut. He could tell his dad had just left for work, and soon it would be his turn to disembark. Tai finally was fully dressed as he walked out to see a half awakened Hikari, attempting to eat her multicolored cereal, commonly known as Lucky Charms. As he entered the kitchen, as his little sister looked up at him with her small, sleepy looking eyes and smiled. Kari seemed to be the one that had a smile that was almost impossible not to return. "Good morning, Tai!" greeted Kari as her sleepy face was fooled by the lively voice she spoke with.

"Good morning! You sure sound like your tired!" added Tai, as he yawned loudly while he stretched his arms to relieve his joints from his stiff sleeping positions.

Tai quickly looked at the kitchen clock, which was located above the stove and determined that he had fifteen minutes to get ready. He had to be to work at quarter to eight, just until school had started. It was a summer job that was practically considered full time. But it made up for good pay, the equivalent to ten dollars.

Tai grabbed an empty bowl and began to pour cereal and milk in it as he noticed his little sister, still in her night gown, made her way over towards the television. She was probably going to watch one of them kiddie shows like Pokémon or Medabots. Tai took out an Orange and began peeling the outside skin of the round fruit, then deposited the peelings into the organic garbage. Tai's mom was usually really neat and precise when came to sorting out garbage. Speaking of his mom, she was also up by now. For some unknown reason, she still slept very soundly. Tai now remembered that Kari was awoken several times last night and this morning, as she woke up Tai to tell him that they were fighting really badly again. He quickly sat down and ate his orange and cereal. Then after he put the spoon and his empty bowl once again in the sink, he walked over to Hikari and sat down beside her.

He noticed that there were dark sleep bags, which almost resembled two very big black eyes, on his sister's face. He knew they woke her up and kept her from sleeping. "Kari, did you sleep at all last night?" asked Tai, as he noticed a blank stare was also being watched by the television.

For a second he though he saw something roll down her face, starting from her eye, down her cheek. He knew something was wrong. She still stared at the boob tube. Lately it seemed that Kari's and Tai's parents always fought, after they both went to bed. They would always wake up Kari, and usually Tai, but this time Tai slept through it. Usually when they fight, Kari tries to sneak into Tai's room for comfort, as she gets him to hold her, until she falls back asleep.

Kari's face seemed to change dramatically. She looked as if she was going to totally break down and cry. She looked at Tai, and from the innocent face Kari gave, it was dead obviously she was going to cry. She immediately hugged him and bawled her little eyes out. Tai was shocked at how fast and firm the little girl had hugged him and how much she was crying. He looked at the clock as he realized he had to go. He thought of something. Maybe he could get Yamato or someone else to look after Kari for a day. He was really worried about his sister. He wish he could stay home from work to look after her. Just then the phone rang, and for some reason, he started crying. He didn't know who exactly why he was crying. He couldn't though, because then she would think her brother wasn't courageous or strong enough. He let go of the firm hold that his sister had around him and firmly applied. He had caller ID, and read it as he picked up the phone. It was work. "Hello, is Taichi Yagami there?" asked a small feministic voice, which sounded awfully familiar.

"Yes, speaking!" replied Tai, as he cleared his cheek of any tear residue.

"Sorry to inform you, but Osaka carpentry has officially ceased its account and became bankrupt. I'm terribly sorry Mr. Yagami. You will get a full week's pay next week, I'll personally send you the check, as well as the lay off slips. Thank you very much for your co-operation!"

Tai smiled brilliantly. This actually made his day a whole hell lot better then what it was before. He then realized the voice was that of the small secretary at the front desk of the office. Tai was usually there, because he was always clumsy enough that he would hurt himself. Last week he smashed a hammer on his thumb, and was rushed to out patients, but through his thick skull, that he still had to work for money even though he had an injury, instead of going on workers compensation.

He realized he was still on the phone. "Ok… Thank you very much. I'll talk to you later. Bye."

Tai put the phone back on the receiver and walked back to his half sobbing sister, and sat down beside her. He was always caring and loving for his sister and sister alone. He loved her as a sister. And he was glad that he could do it just for her. She looked through two semi blood shot eyes and asked him a question. "Tai, who was that?"

Tai smiled. "It was the secretary at Osaka's carpentry. They went bankrupt!"

"Tai, that's sad! Now you don't have a job any more." Added Kari as she hugged her brother very briefly, and sat back down on the couch, where Tai was currently sitting.

Just then Tai heard someone stir from the bedroom, it was his mom. He wondered why she wasn't up yet. He didn't want to tell his mom that he was laid off from bankruptcy. She walked into the living room. Red hand prints laid on his mothers face, cheeks as well as red finger marks, and streams of tears rolling down her face.

…Against my will I stand beside my own reflection, it's haunting, how I can't seem…

…To find myself again…

Fear haunted the room as well as confusion mixed in with hatred. Tai thought he had just figured what had happened last night, and it almost tore his heart apart in two, knowing that his step dad had done this and his mom let him get away with it. He was speechless. He was almost unable to talk. He was in pure awe. He looked over at his sister, and saw a perturbed look, that was easily defined as being scared with her hands over her mouth.

… The more serious I took things, the harder the rules became…

Tai's mom was unable to talk. She looked scared and ashamed. Ashamed for letting them see what their step dad was getting away with. "…I'm so sorry Tai, Kari… I'm so sorry…" replied Tai's mom as she looked at the blank faced of Tai and saw Kari's perturbed worry face.

Kari quickly got up and ran over to hug her mom. She felt indigenous of her mom's predicament. She wanted to do what Tai was doing to her. Comfort her. She didn't like seeing people down on themselves either especially when it was her family.

Tai still looked at his mother with a vicious blank gaze. He finally subsided and looked down at his hands. "What will I become?" mumbled himself, as he couldn't hold the tears back anymore.

Tai examined his hands thoroughly, examining each and every wrinkle and imprint and joint. He wondered if he was going to be exactly like his step dad or even worse, like his real dad. 'Am I going to hurt the very one I love?' asked Tai in his head, as he felt the small snakes slither down his face. 'Am I?'

"Tai please don't…" begged Tai's mother, as she knew what he was going to attempt.

"I'm sorry mom… I've got dad in me… I don't want to hurt…" sobbed Tai as he looked up at his mom.

"Tai, you're nothing like him… TAI!" screamed Tai's mother as he darted for the door, leaving his loved ones behind.

Tai now realized why his sister was sad this morning. Not because of the fight, but because she was scared that I might become another Yagami, an abuser. Tai wished that this was all a dream, and that he wished he was working now, instead of going through what he just did. He ran past the front door, and exited a world of hurt, that Tai was totally incapable of sustaining in him any longer. It took full control over him now.

…Crawling in my skin, these wounds they will not heal, fear is how I fall, confusing what is real…

Tai thought for a moment as he was almost in a uncontrollable sob-matic fear. He tried to think of someone to go and talk to. He thought of someone he really loved. Sora, and she loved always helped him in situations. Tai was completely unable to control his rhythm of each and every time he breathed from crying many obscure streams of tears running down his face and cheeks.

He continued to run, till he arrived at the block where Sora was located. He saw Yamato's car, which he bought last week, by her house. He stopped as he wiped his face clean of tears. He didn't want her to see him cry. He walked up to the door, and rang the doorbell. With in a couple of minutes, the door opened and revealed a reddned face Sora, with her hair very messy, semi dressed and panting. Tai was shocked. Maybe she just got up, or got out of the shower. "Sora… I need to talk to you. It's really important…" urged Tai as he motioned to enter her house.

She blushed a deep crimson, and looked down. "I'm sorry Tai, but I'm busy… I got to make some… lunch… for mom…" falsely lied Sora as she attempted to look him in the eyes.

Tai looked puzzled. Sora again looked down away from his face. He walked past Sora, with out Sora even attempting to stop him. "Please, Tai, don't go in there…", but the words were cut too short for Tai to actually listen.

He stood by the sofa, as he noticed a blonde haired male, with pale ice blue eyes exchanging a common glare. Tai's eyes had already hurt from his parents issue, now he felt himself almost choke on his regurgitated heart. He felt completely used and hopeless. He held his anger back. He wasn't one to get angry. He felt the heat of the liquid run down the small of his face. He looked down as it rolled off his cheek.

…I found out how little I accomplished, all my plans denied…

Thought Tai, as he, couldn't bare himself to hold his head up anymore. He slowly walked out of the Takenouchi residence, and paused by a teary eyed Sora. " Next time you hide something from me, remember to put on your pants back on…" added Tai as he dashed down Sora's street.

She looked down at her almost half naked body, and brought her hands up to her face and began to cry. She let down the very one she loved so dear, so real, and couldn't control herself as she felt extreme guilt. She fell on her knee's as Yamato came over and held her attempting to comfort her from her secret affair.

Tai ran a far distance. He didn't care. 'I don't fucking care anymore. Just whatever…' trailed off Tai, in his own dazed and confused head. The tears still flowed down his face ever so. The burning sensation of crying was too much and too much as he felt their attempt to shut from being completely exhausted from crying so much. He tripped over something, probably from the fact of crying for almost several hours. His eyes widened and revealed he was falling on a blushed figure, landing completely on top of her. He could tell that it was a girl indeed. As he fell, he landed on his hands and on his knees. He let out a small shriek of pain and anger, as he tried to look through his blurry vision eyes and see what trouble he had accumulated.

"Are you all right?" asked a winded female figure.

Tai looked up and saw what he assumed was her face, as she slid out from under him got up and offered him a hand to help him back up.

"Tai… is that…" asked the pinked haired girl, as Tai got up with a grimace, and bloodshot eyes from crying and asked her "What do you know girl…"

Then Tai quickly ran away leaving to girl probably to worry about him. He didn't care what happens anymore. His family was dysfunctional. Tari (his older sister from a long time ago) was dead. 'Tari…' …and Kari was a strong girl. He had only hurt though. Him, the great group leader? His real dad is probably out serving time in prison or is roaming the streets as an ex-con, and now Mr. Kamiya is gone for good.

… Please smile when you think of me, my bodies gone that's all…

Tai quickly darted into the bushes, and immediately fell on his knees. He was to scared to stand, and to face the real world. He took out a piece of paper, which he always kept in his back pocket, and wrote his very last message. He tried to read what he wrote, but his current emotion disabled him to actually read. But he mesmerized what he had written. He put what he learned in French class into good use.

…A tout le monde, A tout mes amis, Je vous aimes, Je dois partir, These are the last words I'll ever speak, and they'll set me free…

Tai then removed a handled object from his pocket, as he flipped the knife open, and stared at the reflection and his key to another way out. To deal with all of his troublesome differences…