Summary: Based on a prompt by Morkhan on the Glee Angst Meme:
"Inspired by The Hangover. Because William Schuester is the worst chaperone in the history of time, the Glee Kids have a night on the town and wind up in some... interesting situations.
On Day 2 in NYC...
Finn and Puck wake up cuddled on a bench in Central Park. With no shirts on. Wearing each others' underwear. As hats.
Sam and Tina wake up fully clothed in an unfamiliar hotel room. Sleeping on the bed between them is a small Asian child that neither has ever seen before.
Quinn, Mercedes, and Mike wake up mostly naked on a mattress on a rooftop. No one can quite remember who had sex with who.
Rachel and Kurt wake up on an unfamiliar couch. They soon discover they are in the apartment of a small family of two parents, a boy, and a girl... all of whom speak only Russian.
Lauren and Santana wake up in a shelter of cardboard boxes in an alleyway. They are surrounded by broken glass, covered in bruises, and, for whatever reason, both carrying nunchuks.
Artie wakes up being pushed around an unfamiliar area of town by a strange homeless man who calls him 'Clarence' and uses him as a human shopping cart.
Brittany wakes up bright and early in her hotel room ready to face the day and wondering where everybody went.
None of them have wallets or cell phones on them. And none of them have any idea how they got there. How did it happen? How do they get home? What does William Schuester do when he realizes he lost every single damn kid he was responsible for except one?"
A/N: I can't promise that all points of the prompt will be covered, but I'll do what I can. This is my first attempt at Glee fanfic, as well as crack-angst, so please let me know what you think. Thanks!
What Happens in New York
Prologue: Will & Brittany
William Schuester walked down the 13th floor hallway of the Manhattan Holiday Inn with a bounce in his step. Everything was going well: not only did the New Directions finally make it to Nationals, but Will even had an audition today for a Broadway play! April Rhodes may not be the best playwright, but she still managed to score a theater on Broadway, and that's what mattered, right? Right!
He waved jauntily at the cleaning ladies as he passed their laundry cart. He had to meet April in an hour, but first he had to get the kids out of bed and remind them that they had to finish their songwriting by mid-afternoon so they could start rehearsals tonight. It was last-minute, but last-minute was sort of their thing. Heck, they came up with an entire new setlist on the day of their first Sectionals and still won. If they could do that, they could do anything!
He finally made it to the boys' room and knocked loudly on the door. "Boys, time to get up!" There was no response, but that didn't worry him. They probably weren't morning people. "Breakfast downstairs in 15 minutes!" he shouted, and walked across the hall to the girls' room.
"Rise and shine, ladies!" he called, knocking again.
This time, Brittany answered the door. "Good morning Brittany," he chirped. "Is everyone up?"
"Um… up where?" she asked, puzzled. "Do you know where everyone is, Mr. Shue?"
Will frowned. "What do you mean? Aren't they here?" He stepped around her to see into the room, ready to cover his eyes at the first sign of pajamas. Only one bed was rumpled, the other still made and the cot folded up against the wall. Other than Brittany, the room was empty of people.
"Mr. Shue," Brittany said, "I think they were abducted by aliens."