Some random thoughts on the shinobi's world seen through eyes of a child. Not so random child, because it's Itachi. Much more characters mentioned, you should get all the hints if you know the series.One shot.

My writing experiment after some constructive criticism I've got.

I do not own Naruto.

The Shinobis' World

Death is the inherent part of the shinobis' world and makes it different from everything else, affecting every single aspect of their lives and taking from them, little by little, all these little pieces of humanity and normal life they still have. It makes them harder and in some way it creates the rules they need to follow.

He's not older than three when he notices it for the first time. His mother eyes are red and gleam in a strange way that makes him immediately think about little drops of water. Her face is serious and a smile has disappeared from her face, making her look a bit older and a bit more tired. Sometimes her hands are shaking; it's something he notices with a surprise, because even he knows that his mother is a strong woman who never shows her emotions. "Because emotions makes you weaker", you know, and there is no place for any weakness in the shinobis' world.

One could think he's somewhat worried, and maybe he is in fact, because he can't understand why his mother behaves in a different way than usual. He's watching her with corner of his eyes when they are sitting together in the garden and he's showing her what his father has taught him. She's sitting at the porch, her hands resting on her thighs, and she's looking at him. He focuses his mind on training again. He aims and throws his weapon. The kunai hits the target perfectly and he sees his mother wave at him and he goes in her direction.

'You did well.'

She raises her hand and ruffles his hair and he notices that her hands are not shaking anymore, but her face is still sad and her eyes are still watery.

Later this day he finds out that his mother's close friend has died and that the death itself has affected her badly. But being who she is, she can't allow herself this short while of comfort spent on crying in solitude. Because shinobis never cry. Because the Uchihas never cry. Because she's a mother, a kunoichi, and she should give a good example to her child.

&

He is only four when death appears again in his life. They've dressed him formally and he has been taken to the official ceremony that takes place in the Konoha memorial place. His mothers hand is resting on his shoulder – a simple gesture which is probably to give him some support, but in fact he's all over that and feels too grown up, too mature, to really need that kind of comfort. But he lets his mother to keep her hand on his shoulder, because some quiet voice in his heart whispers that the one who might need support is his mother herself. Her hand is not shaking and she's not clutching his shoulder, but her face is pale and her lips are pressed in a thin line and he knows that something is wrong. That something bothers her.

He's looking around and what he sees are pale, blank, indifferent faces. And in that short moment he sees the truth hidden behind their behaviour. They are here only because it's expected from these who they are – one of the most powerful clans in Konoha. The noble clan. The Uchiha. In fact they don't really care about this boy that died a few days ago during the mission. He thinks about the boy. What he remembers about him is his smiling face and his clumsiness, nothing more and nothing less, although these traits aren't the only he should remember about the member of his own clan. Yet he recalls nothing more.

'He was too weak,' he hears. 'These who are weak are doomed to be killed.'

His eyes watch the men closely when they're talking, completely oblivious to the fact that out of sudden they've got one more, unexpected listener.

'The shinobis' world is strange,' he thinks. The adults' world is strange.

After a short while his eyes move to the other participants of the ceremony, but he's still pondering on the thought. And then he catches a glimpse of some other people whom he doesn't really recognize. He watches them. He sees a boy with white hair, a man whose hair are blond and spiky and a brown-haired girl. They're not standing with the Uchihas and with some surprise he notices that, although none of them cry, (because you know, shinobi never cries) their sorrow is easily noticeable and seems to be much deeper, much stronger, than everything that any of the Uchiha feels.

But after all being the Uchiha means something and there are things that are expected of you, no matter if you want to do them or not. And none of the Uchihas would ever cry, even the mother of the boy who died.

&

And then the death strikes again. It has come with something he recalls as an earthquake and a wall of fire, although he's not sure about it. He has a fever and feels dizzy when he's sitting with his mother in the caverns situated in the rocks over Konoha. His mother is tense and in her arms she's holding a baby, his little brother wrapped in a small blanket. She's whispering comforting words into the both brothers' ears, but it does not really affect him much. Nor does the situation. He does recall some pale and scared faces he's seen before and some short phrases heard, words taken out of context. Fox. Attack. Demon. Kyuubi. Hokage. Fight. DEATH. And people running here and there. Yet his mind is dazed, blinded, by the fever and he couldn't care less in fact. He rests his head in his mother laps and just looks, trying to find something that would occupy his mind for a while.

And then he catches a glimpse of some girl that is sitting there, surrounded by other children. She's not really older than them, but she's hugging them, patting their arms, kissing their foreheads, offering some words of comfort and assuring that everything will be okay and that their parents will come back. But he sees even more. He sees that her eyes are wide opened, that her face is pale and even when she smiles, there is no smile in her eyes. And he thinks that in fact the shinobi world must be a really strange place if even this other child does not allow herself to show her fear. Her weakness. But then the fever finally defeats him and he nods off.

He sees the girl a few days later and with some surprise he realizes that her behaviour has not changed at all. They all are in the Konoha memorial place, bidding their farewell to the man who a few days ago sacrificed his life in order to save Konoha and to all these that were killed during the attack.

She's standing just a few meters away of him, her hand resting on a shoulder of a crying child. He sees her leaning down over the child and he sees how her lips are moving. He can't hear the words, but he's sure that these are words of comfort, because the child wraps his arms about her waist suddenly and hides his face in the girl's clothes. Her hand is ruffling his hair and she smiles, but for some reason her smile seems to be extremely sad to him, making him think that such a smile can cut through one's heart in exactly the same way that a blade of a sword can.

He sees a few people coming to her and asking her about something and he sees her shake her head and smile again with exactly the same sad smile, with the other child's arms still wrapped around her waist. And they smile back.

'People are blind,' he thinks and continues to watch the girl.

The ceremony is over, the child is gone and people are slowly coming back to their houses. Yet his mother is still here, still standing and looking at that small memorial monument. And for the first time he sees her being lost in her thoughts.

And then he notices that the girl is still here. She's standing and looking at the same monument his mother is looking at, but now her face is pale, her lips are pressed and in this one short while he's able to see through her mask and he notices that the girl is close to tears, but she's still restraining herself. And something breaks inside of him. He remembers all these unshed tears he's almost forgotten about. Tears that left deep scars on his own heart. Tears that would be the sign of his own weakness. Because boys never cry. Shinobis never cry. The Uchiha never cries.Itachi never cries. And the whole shinobis' world is somewhat unfair.

In this short moment he makes his decision. He goes into the girl's direction and stands by her side. He raises his head and in a calm, quiet voice he says, 'You can cry now. Nobody can see you and I won't tell you anyone.'

The girl tosses her head and looks at him with her eyes wide opened and surprise clearly visible on her face. He looks at her with a serious look in his eyes, focusing on her face. She looks at him for a short while and then she hides her face in her right hand and starts to cry.

She cries voicelessly, tears flowing down her face, her fingers and wetting her dark shirt. He stands by her and feels uneasy about the whole situation. Because he realizes that in fact he doesn't know what to do when someone around him is crying. So he does the only thing that comes to his mind and puts his little hand on the girl's left hand, not really sure what he is hoping for. The girl's fingers clutch on his hand, but he doesn't try to free it. He's standing by her side and waiting till the girl stops crying and calm down a bit.

After a short while she looks at him and her clear eyes are filled with something, although he is not really sure what it is. She smiles trough tears with that sad smile of her, her face is still wet, stained with tears, but she doesn't wipe them away.

'Let's pray together for a while, okay?' she says and lets of his hand.

Despite himself he does what she says. He's standing by her side, with his eyes closed, praying silently. He finishes his prayer and lets his mind wander.

'The shinobi world is strange,' he decides finally.

He can't stop wondering why he was born in such a world, but he let the thought go away. Instead he decides to enjoy this short moment of calmness; one of these rare moments when he does feel like human.

The end. Well, how was it?

Constructive criticism/comments, please?