A/N:okay, just a fic that came to me. I noticed that there aren't any KurtXEvan fics, and this came to me...er, at least none I could find...So, please enjoy and don't worry there it isn't very slashy...I don't do graphic..this is my first slash so be gentle..its really kinda sappy at the end, and there's some language I hate to use, I really hate the language, but if you wish to know why I used it please just ask nicely. All flames will be used for my Scolbowl (quiz bowl) team's beagle roast this year.
and now this is very long and rambley..damn...
Please enjoy and review!
thanks!
Ragni-the-rambler.
ps-i've reversed the norm. Italics are not flash backs, normal type is. fyi

It was raining.

He hated when it rained, it made his knee hurt.

But that wasn't the only reason why he hated the rain. The rain took something from him...something important...

But the rain also gave him someone. Someone he'd died for, someone he cared so deeply for. Someone the others didn't know he felt that way for.

Evan wasn't sure when he noticed the first time that he was being watched. Maybe he had always felt it, but he was sure that he was being watched, a year ago today...

God it had been a year already? Damn, where did the time go?

Sitting on the window seat, Evan watched the rain, remembering that day (and the week or two before it) with a bitter sweet smile on his face.

He had been out skateboarding again, like he always was in those days, he rarely got on his board anymore, only when he was asked to.

He was coming back, late for dinner..again. Auntie O would kill him, but was it really his fault that his watch broke last week when Kurt fell on him? No, and he didn't have enough money to buy himself a new one yet, so he was usually late now for everything.

Evan jumped off his board, kicking it up and catching it as he ran up the stairs of the mansion. He wouldn't hear the end of it tonight, he knew it. He was missing not only dinner, but he was pretty sure he'd missed a danger room session. Damn he was definitely in for it tonight.

He heard everyone in the dinning room, and he really didn't feel like being social right then, so he ran to his and Kurt's room, figuring it'd be empty. Kurt never passed up a meal, he couldn't. Not with his metabolism.

So when Evan opened the door, and found Kurt lying on his side, shuddering every so often, he was a little shocked.

"Mien Gott! Katchzen, Go Away!" He yelled, rolling over to glare at Kitty. But it wasn't Kitty. It was a very shocked Evan. "I am sorry Evan. I thought you vere Katchzen. I am sorry."

Kurt looked really down and he rolled back over, seemingly set on ignoring his roommate. Evan was a little worried, what could have happened that kept Kurt from eating? From the smell of it it was pizza night. Kurt never missed pizza night, even if he was down in Hank's lab being patched up. He'd just sneak off.

"Dude you okay?"

"Ja...I am okay." Kurt replied sounding anything but. Evan set his board down and walked over to the other side of Kurt's bed to look at him. He had been rooming with Kurt long enough to know that he was not okay.

"Dude, its pizza night and you're in here, crying. You are not okay. What's up dude?" Evan sat on the edge of Kurt's bed, putting a hand on his shaking shoulder.

Kurt tried to roll away but Evan wouldn't let him. He'd done that enough at night when he started screaming, waking and scaring the shit out of Evan every time. He set his hand under Kurt's chin and made him look at him.

Kurt shut his eyes, tears still falling, sobs racked his body once again. Evan didn't know what he could do. Every time this happened-usually in the wee hours of the morning- he felt so helpless and useless. He couldn't help his friend with his nightmares, but he had a funny feeling he could help with this.

"Dude, you can talk to me. It'll be okay, just tell me what's up." Evan tried to smile but it didn't work, and Kurt only cried harder. So he did the only thing he could think of that might remotely help. He took his blue, sobbing friend into his arms and held him tight.

"'S'okay dude. 'S'okay. Did Kitty freak on ya again? She didn't call you a monster did she?" Evan asked, trying to find out what the hell happened while he was out, all the while trying to get him to stop crying.

"Nein, Kitty didn't say anything like zat. She didn't do anything..." Kurt choked out, holding onto Evan now like he was drowning. Slowly Evan rubbed Kurt's back, trying to calm him down, remembering how his mom did that when he was little. It made him feel better, so why not Kurt?

"So, if it wasn't Kitty, what-" Evan stopped mid-question. Why didn't he think of that sooner?

''Pietro?"

Hearing the name of his crush Kurt started sobbing harder, unable to vocally answer, but his reaction told everything.

Evan sighed, still muttering that it'd be okay, still holding Kurt close. A very small part of his mind was asking him if he was really comfortable being that close to Kurt, especially after Kurt's admittance of being bi. But Kurt was his friend and he needed someone to talk to, to hold him when he cried, and he had a feeling that no one else would be able to do that, without asking a million questions.

"Dude what the hell did he do? I swear if he hurt you I'll-"

Kurt looked up at him in horror,"Nien! Nien! Evan he didn't do anything! He just looked at me and ran." Kurt sobbed out, dropping his head back to Evan's shoulder, needing his friend to try to understand that he had been rejected and that it hurt.

"'S'okay Kurt. If he can't see how great a guy you are, then he doesn't deserve you." Evan whispered, shocking not only Kurt, but himself.

"Was?"

Kurt was looking him in the eye, and Evan could only pray that he didn't get mad. A mad Kurt was funny as long as his anger wasn't directed at you, if it was, well...run.

"Yeah. Its true ya know." he assured, and he felt Kurt stiffen a bit. Evan took his arms from Kurt and slid off the bed, giving his friend all the space he needed.

The elf seemed to cheer up a bit at that, despite Evan letting go of him. They sat in silence for a bit, all the while Kurt's eyes stopped watering and the puffiness went down.

Evan had moved himself to the window seat and was staring out at the darkening sky. Someone would be up eventually to see if Evan was back and if Kurt was sick..eventually.

He was thinking about holding Kurt like that and what he said. It could be taken as he feels for him as more than a buddy, and he doesn't...does he?

While Evan was pondering his sexuality and everything that went with it, Kurt was watching Evan stare blankly at the night sky. He heard a stomach rumble and his own replied.

"Dude, you vant to see if zere is any pizza left?"

No response, so Kurt walked over and poked him in the side of his head. Jumping a little, Evan looked at Kurt and his devilish grin. He knew that grin, Kurt was planning something.

"What did you say du-"

BAMF!

Evan let out a shocked cry as he and Kurt landed in the dinning room, smoke clearing around them. Kurt let go of his waist and he stumbled a bit grabbing the back of a chair.

"Dude didn't I tell you to warn me when you're going to do that?" He asked, hearing snickering coming from somewhere next to him. He'd have looked, but his head was swimming. Unlike everyone else, teleporting never sat too terribly well with him.

"I'm sorry Evan." Kurt apologized, back to being the carefree joker everyone saw. He pulled out the chair next to Evan, onto which he gratefully collapsed. Dropping his head onto the table he heard the Professor say something.

"Huh?"

"I said you are late."

"Sorry.'' he mumbled, knowing full well the lecture to come. He didn't want to hear that right now, hell he didn't even want to be there right now. He had a skating contest early tomorrow and he just wanted to go to sleep so he'd be up early and ready.

So for what was left of dinner, Kurt joked with everyone and Evan sat in relative silence, staring into space.

#

The next morning Evan left before everyone who'd come watch him, to get ready and everything.

It was a few hours later, when the competition had started, did he feel a set of eyes never leaving him, no matter where he went or what he did. That was a bit unnerving but he was hoping it was someone who could make him big. No such luck.

After he finished another round in the competition he caught Kurt staring intently at him. Evan gave him a smile and waved his greeting before he went on. If he had looked back he would have seen Kurt blush a little. Storm did, but she was sure Kurt was getting a bit overheated, as he was apt to do in the summer.

When she offered to take him some place cooler, he stuttered assuring her that there was no need. He was fine.

So the day went on and Evan finished second much to his disappointment. He had to admit the first place winner was really good, and she deserved it. He felt bad that the rest of the guys there were being assess to her.

After breaking away from the shit fest that was going on, he made his way towards Ororo, Kurt, Jean and shockingly Scott. Giving Ororo a hug he listened to everyone try to make him feel better about coming second.

"Its cool. She's way better than I am."

And with that the subject was dropped, and everyone piled into the van to head back to the mansion. The entire drive back Evan felt someone staring at him, but when he looked no one was. Either he was getting veeerrryyy paranoid-always a possibility -or someone was really good at hiding their attention.

Finally Storm pulled up to the mansion and let them out. Evan jogged up to his room, needing to chill after the day of skating. Not that he minded, but he figured it'd be better if he crashed on his bed and not the rec room couch..again, and then be sat on by Scott and Jean who were too busy trying to suck each others face off to see him zonked out. That was fun...

So onto his bed he fell, finally reaching his room and his eyes shut before he even hit the pillow. And he dreamed, oh man did he dream.

He had woken up with Kurt curled up next to him, his tail around Evan's waist, promising him everything. And then Kurt's lips met his and -Oh God!- that tail moved from his waist to someplace lower. He moaned.

And he must have moaned out-loud too, because Kurt was shaking him awake, worried that Evan might be in pain.

"Huh?"

"Are you alright?"

Evan's brain couldn't quiet catch up with Kurt and he stared blankly at the worried face. Being a worried friend Kurt sat down, trying to get Evan to look at him. He wouldn't, every time he saw Kurt he saw...oh god, what the hell?

"Dude, Evan, are you alright? Do I need to go get Hank? Or Stor-"

"Nah dude, I'm cool. Just a really...weird dream. I'm alright." Evan muttered to his wall, wanting Kurt to take his hand off his shoulder, all the while wanting Kurt to just hold him. But Kurt wasn't into him like that so he should just get rid of these thoughts.

"Okay.." Kurt replied skeptically, something was up with Evan...Oh Gott, did he know that he had been watching him all day?

A tri-digit hand patted his shoulder and he heard Kurt shuffle over to his bed. It was then that he realized that it was dark, and Kurt was only wearing pajama pants.

Not wanting to think about that any longer Evan flopped back down on his pillow and slept..for a while. Til he heard Kurt talking to someone, who sounded like he was sitting on the window sill.

Evan rolled over without a sound, opening his eyes a crack, seeing Pietro sitting on the window sill, his hand on Kurt's arm. They were both smiling at the other and Kurt leaned in and brushed his lips against the speedster's cheek.

He couldn't help it, he groaned and sat up. He kept his eyes looking closed but he saw the two freeze. Rubbing his head, he stood and shuffled to the door, ignoring both of them. Out of their room he walked and down to the bathroom, locking the door behind him when he entered. The tub was just as comfy as any a couch they had, so he might as well.

God he thought Kurt told him that Pietro turned him down? God he was so stupid, he should have known that the speed demon would have come back, anyone would have. God damn it.

#

Loud knocking woke him and he tried to roll over. Whoever it was could wait for Kurt to let them in..wait.

Kurt!

Evan sat up and groaned, every muscle in his body protested, not liking having spent the night in the tub.

"Who's ever in there hurry it up!" Kitty called, sounding very impatient.

"Yeah, just a sec." Evan tried to stand, but his knee popped painfully and he fell back down, making a loud thunk when his butt hit the tub. Kitty heard the thunk and came in, shouting a warning about decency.

She found Evan in the tub, trying to get up.

"What are you doing-"

"Never mind, just help me up." he groaned out, his neck stiff and unwilling to move. She did and again asked why he was in there.

"You don't wanna know." And with that Evan hobble down the hall, praying that he wouldn't find Kurt and Pietro in bed. He had no problem with them, he'd just rather not see that...well, Pietro anyway.

So when he opened his door, he was relieved to find Kurt lying in his bed, fully clothed-or as clothed as he had been when Evan left- sleeping. Evan shuffled over to his dresser and pulled out a change of clothes. Changing as quickly as his stiff body would let him, and trying to stifle as many groans as he could, he succeeded in waking Kurt up.

"Evan?"

Kurt watched groggily as Evan tried to get dressed, seemingly stiff all over. He never got stiff after a competition, so what was wrong? He moved like he fell asleep on the-oh Gott.

"You vere avake last night, ja?" Kurt asked, afraid of what his friend would say.

"Yep."

"You fell asleep on the rec room couch again?" Kurt asked, feeling bad that he had woken Spyke up and made him leave.

"Tub." Evan grunted as he tried to get his jeans on, falling onto his bed in the process. "Ow."

Kurt sighed and got up, the least he could do was try to help.

"You von't tell anyvoen vill you? I do not think zat zey would be too happy if they found out zat.." Kurt trailed off, seeing a pained look cross Evan's face. "Dude, seriously, are you alright?"

"I'll get back to you on that.." He moaned, trying to move his head to look at Kurt. Kurt sighed again and moved to prop Evan up in front of him.

"Wha-"

"You vould like to move your head ja?" Kurt asked, his accent pretty thick that early. Saying nothing Evan let Kurt work out the nasty knot that had formed in his neck, trying not to enjoy it too much.

"So, you and Pietro?"

The elf was so grateful that Evan couldn't see his face, things didn't go quiet as planned last night.

"Nien, it did not go well last night. He asked to talk and he told me he had no interest in guys...I made a fool of myself." Despite Kurt's hurting his hands never stopped working out the knots that he found were covering Evan's back, neck and shoulders.

"Oh well, he's a dick." Evan put out there, glad to find he could move his head without much pain. Kurt laughed and made a point of pushing on a really big knot. Evan moved away as much as he could, letting a whimper of pain escape his lips.

"I know, zat's why I like him." he joked, laughing when Evan shook his head.

Having finishing fixing Evan's back as much as he could, Kurt got up and got dressed himself.

#

A week or so passed in relative peace, nothing to do really. And Evan found himself hanging out more with Kurt. Not that he was complaining, he enjoyed the fuzzy one's company. And he also finally figured out what was up with him.

Evan wanted to tell Kurt, but he figured he should tell his parents first, or at least Storm, but he calmed up every time he tried. How did Kurt tell everyone he was bi again? Er..has he has told everyone hasn't he?

Evan shook his head clearing those thoughts, and went back to watching Kurt scarf half a pizza down by himself. He went to grab the last slice only to find it had disappeared into someone's mouth.

"Dude, not cool."

Kurt shrugged and smiled, looking outside.

"It's going to rain, ve should head back." Kurt pointed at some nasty storm clouds that were on the horizon. Evan nodded and figured that he could talk to Kurt on the walk back. So he paid for lunch, and they headed out.

"So, uh, Kurt..I was just wondering," Evan stopped briefly to see that he had Kurt's attention, "Have you told everyone you're bi yet?" Evan saw Kurt flinch a little and shake his head.

"Nien, only you know." He sounded a little regretful about that. But Evan didn't dwell on that too long, it was starting to rain and there was lighting. They were a little short of the city limits when it started pouring down. They wouldn't make it back to the mansion, they'd get sick. So Evan decided to pull Kurt into an alley near an older building, so they could hide under the eaves and stay semi-dry.

"Evan, was-?"

"You wanna get soaked?" he asked, seeing Kurt shake his head. So they stood under the eaves, freezing their butts off, because neither of them planned on rain and it was getting cold.

At one point during their chilly wait, Kurt had inched really close to Evan and was almost leaning on him. Without thinking about it, Evan put his arm around Kurt and hugged him close.

"Evan?"

"What?" Kurt motioned to the two of them. "So?"

"You have no-"

Evan shook his head, stopping Kurt with a hand over the mouth. "Dude, I got something to tell you." He started, hoping that Kurt'd just guess it and he wouldn't have to say it. But Kurt remained silent behind his hand, which Evan quickly removed. Kurt had tilted his head to his right, studying Evan in the shadows of the alley.

"Ja?" he encouraged, seeing Evan wasn't finishing his thought.

"I-I...damn it, I can think it but I can't say it!" he groaned, feeling redicusly weak. He tried several other times but stuttered himself to a stop. Finally Evan settled on showing Kurt what he was trying to say.

Evan pressed his lips hesitantly against Kurt's and when a very shocked Kurt opened his mouth invitingly he deepened their kiss. Somehow Kurt ended up against the wall of the building and hands were roving very freely.

Then a throat cleared. They broke apart immediately, Evan turning to find some of his 'friends' standing there watching them.

"Hey dudes, what's up?'' he asked, trying to sound casual.

The one in front barked out a laugh. "What's up? You're a f-cking faggot that's what's up! God and to think we were friends."

"Kyle-"

"No, you f-cking mutie fag, you don't have the right to say my name." Kyle spat, eyeing both of them in contempt. Evan felt Kurt shrink behind him and he moved to say something when a fist flew out and hit him in the side of his head, knocking him out instantly.

"Evan!" Kurt yelled, catching him as he went down. His voice echoed around a bit, and the other two moved to gang up on him.

Kurt wasn't sure how long they beat him and Evan-mostly Evan- but by then the rain had pretty much stopped, though it still looked like it would start again any minute. They had stopped beating up Kurt, he wasn't that much fun, he took his hits and didn't cry out. The very unconscious Evan on the other hand...

With every cry Kurt tired to pull away from the one who held him, feeling like it was all his fault that this was happening. The familiar tickle at the back of his mind, telling him he could 'port was not there and he knew if he tried he'd end up blacking out.

Evan was bleeding a lot, and his left knee was not facing the way it was suppose to. All Kurt could do was yell at them, beg them to stop, beg someone to come help.

And after what felt like an eternity, and Evan had stopped yelling and could only whimper, Kurt's pleading was answered. The three had moved from Evan over to Kurt, figuring he'd watched long enough.

"Three against one huh? That ain't fair." A voice growled out from the opening of the alley.

"WOLVERINE!" Kurt cried, so relieved that help had finally showed up. He looked away from the three thugs that Evan once called friends, to where Logan stood with a very concerned looking Jean next to him. She appeared to be speaking to everyone, telling them something.

Kyle, 'Skull' and Eric looked over at Logan, who was waving his claws at them. Seeing that they fled down the alley, Kurt falling to his knees. As Jean and Logan rushed over to check on them, Kurt crawled over to where a now motionless Evan laid. Seeing his friend, Kurt started sobbing, begging for forgiveness.

Jean took Kurt into her arms and held him back while Logan checked him over. Swearing he hit his comm. badge yelling at Hank to get his furry blue ass over there now!

Soon Hank and the rest arrived, Blackbird at the entrance of the alley. Hank gently set Evan on the stretcher he held and looked briefly at Kurt, clucking his tongue in worry. As cold hearted as it was of him to say, Kurt could wait. Or Storm could take care of him. Evan was Hank's first priority.

Getting the two on the Blackbird, Hank started working on Evan and Jean tried to get Kurt to tell her what happened.

"Kurt, did it have something to do with your image inducer fizzing out?" she asked gently, drawing Kurt's attention to the fact that he didn't look 'normal', but his normal blue fuzzy self. He doubted Evan would be too happy with him saying that it was because they had been making out, so he nodded his head mutely.

"He was protecting me...Oh Gott..." Kurt started sobbing, shaking all the while. Kitty walked over, set a blanket around his shoulders and hugged him, letting him cry.

#

They got Evan back and into Medlab in one relative piece and when Hank was sure he'd be alright-and after he let Storm see him-he set to checking out Kurt. The poor boy was sitting on one of the beds, staring at Evan, rocking back and forth, either not noticing or not caring that he had a cut on his head, along with all sorts of bruises and contusions.

"Kurt?" Hank set a hand on his shoulder and he nearly teleported out of state. "I'm sorry for startling you. I need to make sure you're alright." he spoke softly, stepping in his line of view, blocking his view of Evan. Kurt teleported around him and sat on the other chair next to Evan's bed. Obviously he needed to see Evan, to assure himself that he was alright or for some other reason, Hank wasn't sure, but he had to check Kurt's head.

"Kurt, may I look at your head?" Kurt nodded, never taking his eyes from Evan's bruised face. Hank cleaned the cut and found that there was nothing else really that needed attention. The split lip would heal on its own, the few bruises that were visible on his face would take care of themselves, and Hank gave him strict instructions that if he got a headache or started hurting anywhere to come back down.

Kurt nodded mutely, his legs drawn up to his chest, still watching Evan. Evan was into him and all Kurt did was get him beat up. Ended his chances at going pro. He had heard Hank tell Storm that while he would still be able to walk and rejoin the X-men, his skate boarding days would be over.

A few hours later Storm left to call Evan's parents and Kurt moved to the chair closer to Evan. Looking around quickly and seeing no one around, Kurt took Evan's hand in his and whispered how sorry he was.

"You confide in me and I get you beaten..Gott I'm so sorry Evan." He leaned over the bed, and set a gentle kiss on his forehead. Evan uttered a moan and tried to shift over to his side, but the brace on his knee made that impossible.

"Dr. McCoy!" Kurt yelled, seeing Evan wince. "Sorry," he dropped his voice, giving his hand a squeeze. Right before Hank entered Kurt tried to take his hand from Evan's. Tried, but Evan wouldn't let him.

There's nothing sexual about holding a hurt friend's hand, nothing sexual at all. And when Hank walked in he didn't even bat an eye at Evan gripping Kurt's hand. He was in pain and Hank had yet to give him anything that would really help, he had feared a concussion.

After getting checked out by Hank and sobbed over by Storm, Evan was left almost alone. Kurt was in a corner, watching him, guilt written on his face.

He motioned with his hand that didn't have the IV in it for Kurt to come over. He complied and sat in the chair Storm had vacated.

"You...okay?" he croaked out. He had been hit in the throat, he wouldn't be talking for a while.

"Ja..Evan I'm so sorry, I-" A hand taking his three fingered one shushed him. Looking at Evan in surprise, he saw that his friend was smiling..or as much as he could in that state.

"Not...your...fault..." he coughed, wincing. Kurt tightened his grip and smiled a little. Evan gripped his hand back and continued to speak, despite the pain, "I...think...I...love...you..fuzzy man..."

Kurt's heart skipped a beat, no two. Evan loved him? Holy Gott...how he had always wanted to hear those words..And now he couldn't say them back.

Kurt's silence made Evan rethink what he had just said. Maybe Kurt wasn't really-

A pair of lips brushing across his own stopped all those thoughts. He opened his mouth and he and Kurt explored each other for a bit, vaguely hoping no one came to check on Evan.

When Kurt pulled away he saw Evan give him a goofy grin. That answered that question.

"Vhen Beast lets you leave, I'll take you out...ja?" Kurt asked, seeing the unspoken happiness in Evan's eyes. Then it was replaced by worry, and Kurt knew before he even opened his mouth what he was going to ask.

"Nien, I did not tell zem..Zey assumed it was because my vatched died on me...I lied to zem." Kurt smiled when Evan's hand moved to his face and brushed his cheek in thanks. "Ve vil have to tell zem sooner or later."

Evan nodded, glad he had someone with him. Hank had told him that he may never skate board again, and he was sad about that yeah, but he was so happy that Kurt was okay and that he wanted him as much as Evan did.

He drifted to sleep, dreaming of a blue fuzzy elf, holding a tridigit hand.

"Evan..Evan.." a voice called to him, bringing him from his remembering. He looked at the person in front of him, his tridigit hand on Evan's left knee, rubbing small circles over it. He smiled and looked out the window again.

It was drizzling now, not storming like before.

"Are you ready to go? Zey are dying to know vhat's up and quiet frankly I'm starving. It's pizza night, come on!"

Kurt now stood by the door, wearing the ring Evan had given him earlier that day, special made by Forge, looking oh so eager to go downstairs and face them. He briefly looked at his own hand and the ring that was on his thumb.

He stood and walked over to where his elfin lover stood, and wrapped an arm around his waist. Before he closed the door, he looked out the window one last time and smiled broader, feeling Kurt pulling him along. Together they headed downstairs, to where both of Evan's families waited to hear the news they had to tell.

Kurt rested his head against Evan's shoulder, and smiled up at him.

Like he said, he hated when it rained, it made his knee hurt.