This is my 1st fanfiction The main reason I'm writing this is because I'm going through a bit of a tough time right now and it lets me get my feelings out and it also give me something to do and actually be motivated to do something (Sorry for sounding dramatic). Anyway, the character Jordan is based on myself it's not entirely me (e.g I'm 18 not 20). I'm no used to this website and adding chapters and stuff like that I've written the 1
st 3 and I've started the 4th hopefully I'll get the hang of it. I'd like feedback from you if that's ok. XxChapter 1
"So how are you feeling since…you know? Chris finally brought up the subject he, Mike & Ted all wanted to bring up-The locker-room finding out Jordan's gay. This was "The new clique's" first meal together at the hotel since a conversation between them was overheard during a house show. Jordan knew his friends were desperate to know what he was thinking. He knew one of them would have asked sooner or later.
"I'd prefer it if they didn't know. I mean, since you found out I've been more… aware of my sexuality- in a bad way. I wouldn't say I was ready when you found out. I'm still not ready to be open about it."
"Do you wish we never knew?" Mike asked.
"I like that I don't need to hide anything but I don't want to talk about it…yet"
"You know Jordan, we don't care that you're gay and no one else will. You know you can talk to us anytime. You shouldn't bottle up your feelings" Ted was closest to Jordan in the clique, Jordan was his valet/on-air P.A and they always shared rooms together. Ted was like Jordan's big brother.
"I know but I'll talk about it when I'm ready. The few times I actually tried to talk didn't help at all. What's important is that you 3 accept me, I don't care what the rest think." Jordan was lying. He has heard all the little negative comments, speculating his sexuality. He isn't the most masculine of people. The way he acted wasn't masculine, the way he stood wasn't masculine. He acted like a 14 year old girl at times even though he was 20. He was slightly obsessed with staying thin, working out in the gym (only doing cardio to stay thin) and doing yoga to tone his body. People were surprised how he would sit with Ted, Ted would have his arm around Jordan who would rest his head against Ted's chest. Even Jordan's taste in music was girly with singers like Madonna, Dannii, Kylie, and Ke$ha being in his ipod. He was very insecure about is nature but he became more open after Ted, Chris and Mike found out he was gay and encouraged him to be himself. Jordan didn't socialise with anyone outside the clique but Ted, Mike and Chris did. Because of this the locker-room saw Jordan as quite ignorant and cold. Also because he didn't get on with Natalya Neidhart he was seen as a bitch.
"Can we just end this topic please? In fact, I'm going back to my room I need a lie-down I'm jet-lagged. Enjoy your night out guys" Jordan got up and left the table, heading to his room before he started to cry.
Mike broke the silence "He's not ok is he?"
"No" said Chris. "But I'd leave him alone right now. You know what he's like"
"But for how long? He never opens up and he's been acting stranger since we all found out" Ted said.
"He's probably wanting to only talk to one of us at a time. Ted you're closest to him more than anyone, he's most likely to talk to you." Chris instructed. "I think he wants help but doesn't want to ask for help."
"Oh Chris you're so wise" Mike joked.
"I'm not just a pretty face"
"You're right Chris. I'll try to talk to him tonight when I get back to the room."
Jordan lay in his bed staring at the ceiling. He couldn't sleep, his head was spinning over what's been happening lately. It was a good thing he was awake since he'd have to let Ted in.
"I didn't wake you did I?"
"No I've been up all night"
"You should go out with everyone more Jordan. It's better than staying in a hotel all night."
"Aye because the locker-room are all asking for me…not"
"They don't hate you, they just don't know you. You're so mysterious. No one even knows you're last name."
"What's your point DiBiase?"
"If you went out more, you wont be depressed alone with your thoughts."
"Are you saying I'm depressed?"
"You will be if you bottle up your feelings. C'mon it's me. I won't even tell Chris or Mike what we talk about."
"Talk about what? It doesn't matter because I'm not talking!" Jordan was getting annoyed. He turned on the TV and lay on the couch. Ted laughed. He loved how childish and dramatic Jordan was. He turned the tv off.
"Please Jordaroo"
Jordan sat up and gave a half smile. "You had to Jordaroo me. You're lucky I'm you're bitch"
Ted laughed and sat next to Jordan, putting his arm around him. Jordan rested his head against his chest.
"So…have you ever had a crush on me?"
"Oh god aye. Look at you Ted you're gorgeous."
Ted was shocked by Jordan's directness. "Really? Wow. Didn't see that coming. Do you still…?"
"Not really. I mean maybe if you weren't married or straight it would be different but no it only lasted a few weeks. I still think you're hot though."
"Thanks, I think. Anyone else you've had a crush on?"
"Well I don't think he's as hot as you but I had a mini-crush on Chris for a few weeks too. When I fall for someone it either last for a few weeks of years"
"Who's the long crush then?"
"I'm not saying. You'll tell. I don't mind about Chris but that's it."
"Come on Jordan. You cant leave me like this. Who is it? Randy? Cena? Miz?"
Jordan looked away when Ted mentioned Mike. "It's Mike isn't it?"
"If it will shut you up. Yes it's Mike. I fancied him since I first saw him on ECW and now I'm his friend and I actually know him I fancy him even more. It's hard trying to hide this knowing he doesn't feel the same way. I should probably stop hanging out with him but he's one of my best friends. It's so hard Ted."
Ted could feel Jordan's tears on his shirt. "I had no idea. Do you want to tell Mike how you feel?
"No it will only make him feel awkward. Ted don't tell anyone. Not even Chris." "Don't worry you're secret's safe with me" They get up and hug. "Do you feel better you've talked?"
"Well it shut you up but I'd rather have just taped your mouth shut.
"You wouldn't do that. Remember you're my bitch"
"I'm going to bed. Good night Teddy"
"Good night Jordaroo."
Please tell me what you think of this I'll really appreciate it. Xx