He's at a loss.
Yes folks, you heard that right: the almighty narcissist dubbed as Anthony Stark is for the first time in his life, utterly baffled.
Why you may ask is this, "genius, billionaire, playboy philanthropist" confused?
Because for some odd reason. Some totally bizarre, insane, out of this world reason he is in a relationship with the most attractive, compassionate super soldier the world has ever seen.
Well, then again there only is one super soldier in the world to begin with… but that's beside the point.
It's not the idea that said Captain is taken by him that is confusing him, but the reasons behind him doing so.
If he is to be totally honest, Tony Stark isn't just a genius philanthropist. Nor is he strapping on his speedo to go and bathe in a pool of money every day or throwing on a tux to run off to a strip club and tell a girl that she's stolen his arc reactor.
Underneath that suit of armor is also a clumsy, dorky 100% geeky DOOFUS that the media never gets to see because he keeps that side of him in the dark.
See, it's because he spends so much time with Steve that the nerdy side actually comes out, unlike with other members of the team or world really for that matter.
All the times that he's laughed so hard that the wonderful obnoxious snort came and made him shoot liquids out of his nose have been observed by the worst person to see it. Or the moments when the star spangled man has just been so darn affectionate and caring that a horrible, raging blush can't help but fight its way to his cheeks. And when he's in the workshop and the fantastic Steve Urkel glasses come out because damn it- yes his eyesight is just bad enough for him to require them but not terrible enough for contacts to become an option- good ol' Cap is there to witness it all.
So when you put a squealing, red- faced, four- eyed nerd next to a flawless, charming and crowd pleasing super soldier… well it makes him feel a little out of place. And sometimes he fights it back and tries to contain it but by that point it's too late and the damage is done. In the end, Tony just wants to be able to make Steve proud when he gets announced as the other mans better half. He just wants to be…per-
"Tony?"
Squawking in a high pitch tone Tony jumped and spun around to see none other than the man who had been preoccupying his thoughts for the past hour standing behind him. Straightening himself back up to his full yet unfortunately small height, Tony tried to casually lean back on to his work table as he musters out a, "Yes?" at the Captain. Of course, however it was just his luck that his feet end up slipping on some blueprints left on the ground and giving away from underneath him. The next thing he knows he is sent in to an awkward tumble towards the ground with his face slamming in to the concrete floor rather painfully.
"Oh my god, Tony! Are you alright?" he hears from above him as his vision clears and he finds himself staring straight in to the most gorgeous pair of baby blue eyes he has ever seen. Groaning and choking out a, "Super duper" at Steve he sighs before attempting to stand up again.
Bad idea. The world begins to spin around him before he is once again caught in a warm and familiar embrace before slowly being lowered down back on to the floor. "Easy there," the Captain playfully scolds as he brushes some of the hair away from his boyfriends eyes and cradles his head in his lap. "Don't move, that fall looked pretty painful and if you get up too quickly you'll just make it worse. Let me carry you to the couch so you can lay down more comfortably babe."
Barely able to manage a feeble protest, Tony was easily picked up by the other man and carried up the stairs to the living room. "You need to eat more, you weigh about ten pounds less than you did last week." Steve whispered in to his ear before gently lowering him down on to the plush piece of furniture. "Too much work- no time for food." Tony murmured in to the cushions as he groaned in relief at the delicate fabrics contact.
"You're thin as a post. Work can wait. That's actually why I was coming down to the workshop- to tell you that I had just finished baking a batch of cookies and was wondering if you wanted one. I was just going to have Jarvis ask but you had been down there for five hours straight and I found you burning holes through a screw driver with your eyes." Chuckling at the last part he continued, "So do you want one now? They're still warm."
Weakly smirking up at the other man Tony managed a smile and a raspy, "Sure thing doll face. Just make sure that-"
"It's not too crispy around the edges, I know Tony. We've been through this a hundred times. I'm going to get you some ice too- that bruise on your forehead isn't looking to swell."
After receiving a quick peck on the area of his forehead that wasn't damaged and making sure that Steve had sauntered away to the kitchen Tony lifted his hand up to his face before smacking it down upon it as hard as he could and making a quiet noise similar to that of a humpback whale mating call. Stupid, stupid, STUPID. Now clumsy gets to be added on to this seemingly never ending list and Steve has to baby him for a whole day all because he couldn't remember where he had left his blueprints. The pain from his self harm rushed back to him just as Steve returned and he let out a gasp as the cool ice was pressed on to his head.
"Better?" The super soldier questioned. "I feel like a million bucks Stevey- o I really do. Now where's that cookie, I actually haven't eaten anything today," Tony remarked.
Frowning as he handed him the treat Steve scolded, "You really shouldn't let yourself get distracted as much as you do Tony. If you neglect eating and drinking for too long god only knows what could happen. You could pass out and if I wasn't home then-."
"Hey," Tony cooed, reaching out to lace his fingers through Steve's, "I have Jarvis watching over me every minute of every day. Nothing bad can or ever will happen to me."
Running his hand through his hair Steve leaned back in the couch and groaned, "You just worry me sometimes you big doofus. If something were to happen to you I don't know what I would do." Tony smiled back, genuinely touched by his concern. Then just as soon as he began thinking he could start putting back up his walls and neutral facade again, Steve swooped forward and brushed his lips against the other mans nose. As the familiar feeling of heat rushing to Tony's cheeks began the other man gasped and in a desperate attempt to not be seen as a dorky teenager in his lovers eyes, smacked his face in to the side of the couch, sending his ice pack and forgotten cookie flying across the room.
Baffled as he jumped up to retrieve said objects and put the ice pack back on to Tony's head, Steve asked him in a confused tone, "What was that Tony? Is something wrong?" Cooling his cheeks down with the back of his hands, Tony flipped back over to be met by such a gaze and chuckled nervously, "Wrong? W-what, uh um NO! It's just my cheeks are ermmm… is it hot in here? Let me turn down the thermostat."
Pressing my hands down gently on to Tony's shoulders to prevent him from escaping again, the Captain quirked an eyebrow and asked, "Are you sure…? I mean you've been acting really strange lately. I feel like I have a right to know whats going on."
A long pause erupted between them and if Tony still had one, his heart would have been going a mile a minute. "Tony look at me," Steve whispered. Suddenly becoming incredibly fascinated by the cushion pattern he found himself looking anywhere but. If he looked in to those eyes… he knew he would end up saying something he would regret. But then the voice came again, "Tony, please." Oh jesus, rip his reactor out why don't you. Giving in to temptation at last he slowly turned his gaze towards the other mans and found himself overcome with dread and guilt. Worried pools of aquamarine met his eyes and before he knew what was happening the words had already slipped from his lips,
"I don't deserve you."
The silence that followed was so strong you could have heard a pin drop from a mile away.
"Wha-what did you say?" Steve choked out at last, looking down at the other man disbelievingly.
"I said," Tony responded, feeling more worthless by the second, "That I don't deserve you now and I never will. I just… you're so perfect alright! Every time I look at you I see a handsome, charming, beyond compare super soldier and then I look in the mirror and… I'm not the genius, billionaire, playboy philanthropist who I claim to be," he paused to try and will his voice to stop shaking so he wouldn't appear more pathetic than he actually was. "I'm a nerdy, damaged goofball who wears glasses and snorts and blushes like a 12 year old whenever you're around who lately has felt like… like he just doesn't deserve you."
Minutes that seem like hours pass and without another word, Steve gets up and leaves.
Heads straight down to the workshop and abandons Tony to sit there and wallow in his own self misery. Its for the better really he guesses… that they don't end up together. Lord only knows he can become romantically involved with someone better than him. Then, just as he is about to let the numbness of sleep over come his worthless form, he hears it… footsteps.
Cracking an eye open he unbelievingly watches as Steve slowly climbs beside him on to the couch and reaches in to his pocket. Slowly he pulls out a familiar looking black case and he finally speaks up, "You know what Tony, you're right about one thing- you're not a genius. Because if you were you would have noticed by this stage in our relationship that I don't care what you look like or the quirks you have. All I care about is that your heart beats as strongly for me as mine does for you."
Then before Tony knows whats happening, Steve has slid his horrible glasses up on to his nose and begun massaging the sides of his face with his thumbs to prevent him from ripping them off. Relaxing at the touch, Tony is willed to look up at him before he is swooped up in to a passionate kiss, which lasts for a few heavenly moments before he pulls away to find Steve looking at him with a dopey grin and a disbelieving look in his eyes.
"What am I going to do with you," he mumbled, brushing the tears away from Tony's cheeks. "Can't you see that underneath all these muscles I'm still that skinny kid from Brooklyn who was beat up in alleys and teased by bigger guys for practically his entire life? I don't know what lead you to feel like this but let me tell you something right now Anthony Edward Stark. I don't care what quirks or flaws you have- they're what make you who you are and I wouldn't want it…" he paused to tickle Tony's sides to cause the man to blush and snort beside him, "Any other way."
Letting out a pleased sigh and wrapping his arms around the other mans neck Tony whispered, "Thank you babe. You always know exactly what to say." Sliding his arms away so that Steve could press his lips against the other mans, he breathed, "I love you Tony. Don't ever change for me." Smiling in to their kiss, Tony deepened it and pulled back only once when oxygen became an absolute necessity.
Panting, Steve leaned his forehead against his boyfriends and softly whispered, "So now that your head feels better... I guess you won't mind me doing this…"
"Steve what- NOOOOOO!"
The snorts and high pitched screams echoed down the halls as the Captain ran his fingers along the red faced, glasses clad mans sides and realized then and there what it was really like to be imperfectly, absolutely in love.
~ le fin ~
Hope you liked it! If you didn't then I'm sorry- please only leave helpful remarks in the comments and no flames :( This is one of my very first pieces of writing and I could use some suggestions but if you're only going to leave a hurtful message then please refrain from doing so. Many thanks my lovelies 3
-Pheobe