"Cho?"
Her head snapped up instantaneously, black eyes searching for the person who had broken the silence of the night.
"Oh. It's you," she said, her body relaxing visibly when she found a pair of familiar blue eyes.
Terry continued his descent down the stairs. He walked to the sofa she was seated on, noticing how her body stiffened yet again when she realized where he was going. Or coming, actually.
He noted with disappointment how she shifted a fraction of an inch to her left when he sat down on the vacant seat on her right. A pang of resentment ran through him as he watched how she averted her gaze the moment he looked into her eyes. Rejection flooded his veins when he reached his hand out to hers, meaning to take it in a friendly and comforting manner, only to have her pull hers away coldly.
He suddenly felt extremely foolish. This was Cho Chang. The beautiful, intellectual girl that every other boy swore to smell in Amortentia. Who was he? Terry Boot. Mention his name to a bunch of Hogwartians and you'd get confused looks from nine out of ten of them. Who was he to talk to Cho Chang, to attempt to make physical contact with her, to try to comfort her as if they were actually friends? And if it was comfort that she was seeking, she could have simply talked to one of her billion friends instead of sobbing her eyes out in the dead of the night.
But as abruptly as his feeling of foolishness came, a courage like that of a Gryffindor's hit him and he decided that it was now or never.
"Are you okay?" he started, ignoring how her body turned away from his ever so slightly.
Well of course she isn't okay, he scolded himself. If she were okay, why would she be crying in the common room at such unearthly hours in the morning?
"I'm sorry, that was a stupid question to ask," he mumbled.
"No, it wasn't," she said, looking up at him and turning back to face him. "No one's asked me that all day. And my answer is no, I'm not okay."
'Uh… Do you want to talk about it?" he asked unsurely. He was crossing boundaries, breaking through the barriers that had separated them for years. He knew he was treading through unknown territories and briefly wondered when she would snap and push him back out.
"Well I guess I'm just… Confused," she said, hot tears spilling over and rolling down her rosy cheeks again, rewetting the tracks of dried up tears. "And annoyed with myself."
He nodded, encouraging her to continue, reassuring her that he would not laugh or scorn at her, that he wouldn't judge her, but listen to her unconditionally.
"It's just… I miss Cedric. A lot."
She inhaled sharply as she suppressed a sob, He patted her on the shoulder experimentally, glad when she didn't pull away, and elated when she actually cracked a half smile at his actions.
"But I really like Harry a lot too. Then that night when I kissed him after the DA, I actually pretended he was Cedric for a moment. And it felt so right, and yet so wrong at the same time. It felt wonderful when he responded to my kiss, it made me feel wanted and happy again, even if it was only for a few brief moments. But then I thought of Cedric and how I was using Harry as a replacement, a substitute, and it felt so bad, so wrong. Then I felt guilty for kissing him when it hasn't even been a year since… that."
He watched as she stared at the wall behind him, probably replaying the horrible image of Cedric lying there, stony and lifeless, while Harry bawled uncontrollably, hugging the body protectively.
She shook her dainty little head, as if it could somehow clear the horrifying memories.
"And so I thought about it. Did I really like Harry for who he was, or if I liked him because of the way he reminded me so much of Cedric. And I finally decided that I did like him for who he was after much thought. So I went to Hogsmeade with him and brought him to Madame Puddifoot's."
Terry felt the envy course through his veins as he imagined Harry Potter in Madame Puddifoot's with Cho Chang. What he would give to have been in his position.
"But he wasn't responding anymore. Were his feelings for me gone? Then I just had to bring up Cedric and we got into an argument and I don't even know what's going on anymore," she rushed, more hot tears rolling down her cheeks, faster now.
She had returned to the position Terry had caught her in. Head in hands, sobs wracking through her body uncontrollably.
"Why am I even telling you all this?" she spat through her tears.
Terry felt himself draw back a little. This was the snap he knew was inevitable. But instead of retreating back to his dorm, he decided to put an arm on her shoulder. He had come so far that it wouldn't really matter if he did this anymore.
"Cho, it's okay," he said, scooting closer to her when she refused to move closer to him. He wrapped his other arm around her, hugging her.
Slowly, she stopped struggling and relaxed into his hold. Tears dripped down, splashing onto his arm in tiny warm puddles, but he didn't mind. Her two hands grabbed the white shirt of his uniform, fisting them in a death grip, but he didn't move. He let her lean her head against his chest and listened silently as her breathing gradually returned to normal again and her tears eventually stopped flowing.
"Feeling better now?" he asked, almost in a murmur. His hand was rubbing up and down her back slowly and soothingly.
"Mm," she breathed.
"Yeah, sometimes it's good to just let it all out."
She looked up at him with reddened eyes, slowly tracing every single detail of his face, as if really seeing him properly for the first time. She noted the way his brown hair was combed back neatly, allowing full view of his handsome features. Her eyes travelled down to his nose, to his lips- and how kissable they looked just then. She followed the line of his jaw, and back up his well-defined cheekbones, finally stopping at his eyes, nearly getting lost in their blueness.
Her hands had slackened their fierce grip on his shirt and had somehow found their way up to his thick, brown hair, twirling the soft strands between her fingers.
She pulled him a little closer, her experience in kissing all coming back to her.
But for the first time in her life, she was rejected.
He pushed her away gently, his blue eyes boring into hers. She could see the want in them, but the steely self-control overpowered it.
"You're confused," he whispered. "I can't let you kiss me and get even more confused about your feelings. Go to your dorm, wash up, and get a good night's sleep. Tomorrow you can think about it again, and everything will make more sense."
He hugged her and pulled away slowly, smiling warmly at her.
"Goodnight, Cho," he said as he climbed up the stairs to his dorm.
"Goodnight, Terry," she replied, as she picked her stuff up from the ground and made her way back to her own dorm.
She washed up and crawled into bed, more confused than ever. Was she friends with Terry now? Did she actually like him that way too, or was it her emotions taking over her and running wild? Finally, she just decided to take Terry's advice and sleep on it, hoping that a new day would bring new wisdom.