Understand

By FinntheHuman1697

Disclaimer: *sigh* No, I do not own The Walking Dead... but if I did, things would be a lot different... that's all I'm going to say.

A/N: Hello everybody! Yes, I'm back, after a long, long, LONG year of school and drama and whatever I am writing again because with all the shit that has happened in season 4 (seriously, don't even get me started) I couldn't just let it slide without releasing some form of my opinion other than some pretty intense rant sessions with Axelrocks. Speaking of them, I would like to give a huge thank you to Axelrocks who is not only my partner in writing/crime, but has also encouraged me to write again. Thanks dude! Also, I know that a lot of people here have maybe lost faith in Caryl because of this past season, but never lose faith! Season five is just around the corner, so we have to stay strong, Carylers!

Here we go again... Caryl on everybody!

-Understand-

He couldn't believe how fast everything happened. One minute, he was in the train car with Rick and Glenn and everybody trying to create some type of plan that would get them all out of Terminus alive and the next he was running for his life through the forest following Carol to God knows where. And for the life of him, he couldn't understand how it happened, again.

He couldn't fuckin' believe that after all the shit that they went through, they got separated again. Looking back, he thinks that maybe they could have handled it better...

-Understand-

"Okay, is everybody set on the plan?"

Rick scanned the group of people that all seemed to be relying on his leadership at the moment. With weary eyes, everybody nodded and looked around to see if anybody would protest. Nobody did, but that only meant that nobody had a better idea. Rick, seeming to sense this, spoke up.

"Look, I know this isn't ideal, but this is the only option we have right now. If we all work together, if we all stick to the plan then I know we can make it out of here. You just have to trust me,'kay?"

With that everybody seemed to look a little more secure about the plan.

"Good, now let's go over this one more time. Now, we know that they can't just leave us here to die, so at some point they are going to have to bring us food or water or even just open the door to take us out to do whatever they want or have planned to do with us." Rick stopped, trying to gather his thoughts and make sense of all this bullshit they were caught in, because it just seemed unreal that their lives consisted of slipping from one disaster to the next. Closing his eyes for a moment, Rick brought himself back together and spoke again.

"So, when that happens, we have to all be gathered around the door. Not too close that they see us, but close enough so that we can all force our way out. If they only call one of us, probably me or Daryl, then we will get in a group behind that person. Once they open the door enough, we all force it open more and jump out and from there, we start fighting. No doubt there is gonna be a lot of gunshots, so I advise all of you to go after somebody with a gun and take it from them. We have to get the upper hand. Once you have that gun, you kill as many of the people from Terminus as possible. Try to help each other out if you can, but if you see an out, take it. We will rendezvous at the train tracks at the south entrance of the build-"

"I know a place." Sasha said. Everybody's head swung over towards her where she stood by Bob and Maggie.

"Down the tracks a ways there is a big building, and it's empty. It should still be... I was gonna, um, stay there, but then Bob and Maggie... and I... look I just know that it's there, and we can use it." With an anxious look on her face she motioned her head back to Rick to take the attention off of herself. "That okay, Rick?"

Rick slowly nodded his head, "anywhere away from here is good enough for me. So, once you find an escape route, get the hell outta here and get to that building. What does it look like?"

"It's a big red brick building." Sasha spoke up, "There are a lot of cars around it... And an ice cream truck too, I think. Maggie and Bob know what it looks like..."Maggie and Bob nodded in agreement.

"Sounds good. 'Kay, if and when you guys get out, follow the tracks to the red brick building. Once you get there, set up camp, and stay there. Three days, four max. After four days if nothing bad happens then you have to decide if you want to move on or not. Now I'll ask again..."Rick looked up at the group he had come so close to in the past year.

"Is everybody set on this plan?"

-Understand-

"Daryl?"

He heard her, the voice he had been missing since the day she never came back. The day he had lost her, again, seemed so far away because of everything that had happened. Vaguely, Daryl heard that the voice kept calling his name, softly, but firmer each time. He slowly looked up to make eye contact with the same blue eyes that had haunted him ever since the day they lost the prison as he grumbled out a "what" from deep in his chest.

Carol met his hard gaze head on and immediately replied, "Daryl, we have to decide what to do. We lost them, but probably not for long. WE have to decide what we are going to do, where we are going to go... we could just wander and see what happens, but I'd rather not do that. Any suggestions?"

Daryl thought back again to the conversation in the train car. 'Big red brick building... empty... cars around it... away from here...' Daryl cleared his throat and spoke in a gravelly voice, "I, uh, I know a place. It's by these train tracks-"

Carol looked at him questioningly, "You went on the tracks?"

"Uh, yeah." Daryl said. "We all did, I think. But while we were in the car Sasha told us 'bout this place on the tracks. It was down the road, she said. I don't know how far, but that was the plan that Rick made. I think its worth'a shot." He stared wearily at her waiting to see if she would accept it.

Carol looked down and took a moment to mull it over in her mind, then looked up at him again and said, "Rick suggested that, huh?" Daryl nodded. "Well, I guess it couldn't hurt. Let's just make camp here for the night and tomorrow morning we can go for it. You can go hunt if you want, I'm gonna set up the perimeter. Meet back in an hour?"

Daryl let out a sound of acknowledgement, grabbed his crossbow, and left to get dinner for the pair. He liked the woods better anyway.

-Understand-

After splitting a rabbit in two for dinner, Daryl and Carol bedded down around the fire and tried to go to sleep. Every once in a while, he would look over at her to make sure she was still there. That she hadn't left him again. That he hadn't imagined her. And for the first time since he'd known her, the silence between them wasn't comfortable and easy, it was forced and awkward.

It was something he'd never experienced with her before, not even when he came back with Merle. The more he thought about it the more it bothered him, pissed him off, even, because it had never been like that between them.

As he analyzed it to no end, he heard her saying something to him but didn't pick it up. "Hm? He mumbled with hopes that she would repeat herself.

"Um, I was just asking how everything has been with you guys. Tyreese told me all that happened with the prison. I'm... I' m sorry about what happened to Hershel, and I know that doesn't fix it, though. But, uh, what-what happened with you?" she said hesitantly.

Daryl sighed and closed his eyes. "Why the hell do you care?"

Carol looked over at his questioningly, "What do you mean what do I care? Of course I care! But if you want to be an ass about it then whatever. Go ahead and keep it all to yourself. Because that worked out so well before..."

Daryl winced at her words. He didn't mean to be an ass, especially not to her, but so much shit had happened in such a small amount of time that being the Dixon that he was, he didn't know how to process all of it. He sat up, sighing and turned towards her but not looking in her direction.

"A lotta shit happened when the prison fell. We all got split up, nobody knew where to go. Thinkin' back, we probably should'a worked out an escape plan, but whatever. Anyway, I found Beth as I was leavin' and we got the hell outta there. I didn't know what ta do, where ta go... it was hell. A million times worse than the farm 'cause we knew about the losses, but at the same time, we didn't know jack shit about what to do, or where to go, or... just anything, really..."

Daryl continued to speak about all of the hardships he had faced in the weeks since the prison. As he went on and on about the funeral home, setting the house on fire, the group he met up with, claiming, Rick, Carl, Terminus... revealing more and more things every minute, then every other minute remembering little details that meant the world to him he saw how much her face changed. Sadness, anger, understanding, pain, even laughter, when it was appropriate.

And when he started he couldn't stop. With each word that tumbled out of his mouth he felt the weight he didn't even know was there being lifted from his shoulders. He found that the more he revealed, the more he shared with her, his best friend, the easier he could breathe. Daryl realized that he missed this; he missed her and the ease that just her presence brought to him.

He didn't remember falling asleep. He only remembered the calm he felt, if only for a moment.

-Understand-

Gunfire. Chaos. Blood everywhere. That was all he could see from where he stood in the Terminus courtyard.

It took days after they created the plan for the Terminus people to actually open the door. They sent in food through a hole in the corner, but it could only be opened from the outside, so that option was thrown out the window. But when they heard conversation outside with people that sounded familiar but couldn't place, they all had the same idea.

They got in their positions, ready for the leader but instead were met with yelling and fists connecting with flesh outside the car. They could only hear the muffled sound of a battle, but when somebody started shooting, there was commotion at the door. Everybody in the car was startled, but quickly composed themselves and became ready fight for their lives. The handle continued to shake along with the fight outside, and as the door opened and the crew went on the offensive, they were greeted by the face of Tyreese, the very last person in the world they expected.

Sasha cried out for her brother and ran toward him but Bob held her back, remembering that only a few feet away a battle was ensuing.

"COME ON" Tyreese yelled at them. "YOU GUYS GOTTA GET OUT'VE HERE, NOW!" With that he tossed a few knives and guns into the car and them scrambled to obtain a weapon. Their plan had a kink in it now, not starting how they believed it would, but they immediately adjusted and burst out of the car ready to fight.

Daryl, who was unable to get a weapon, immediately looked around for a guy with a gun, but instead saw his beloved crossbow sitting on a table across the yard. Deciding it was worth the risk, he bolted across punching and shoving his way along and the minute he grabbed his bow, shot it right into the forehead of one of the 'Termites'.

Once he was sure he wouldn't come back, Daryl went back to the fight and saw Carol and Tyreese fighting alongside everybody else. As relieved/shocked as he was, he had to go back on the attack. He reloaded his bow and went straight for a man that was attacking Glenn.

Before he knew it, he found himself cornered by two guys and one girl, each having some kind of knife or baseball bat. He saw Carl who had just shot a man in his late 20's, it looked like, and finally, he saw Rick between the two looking back and forth.

"RICK! RICK GET OVER HERE, HELP ME, PLEASE!" Daryl boomed. He was going back and forth between watching the attacking Termites and Rick. He had only two arrows left, no knife, and not a gun for at least 10 feet. Just as he thought he was done for, somebody came up and like a ninja, quickly and quietly disposed of all three of his attackers.

As they dropped to the floor Daryl looked up to thank Rick, sure that his brother would help him in his one time of need. But when he looked up, he saw Carol yelling at him and making big gestures towards a brick wall. He tried to focus in on her words, but only saw out of the corner of his eye Rick running away from the fighting with Carl and not looking back, and some of the group scattering. It hurt for a second, but before he could address it he himself was being dragged along by Carol away from the smoke and yelling and bloodshed to the wall, where small hole was dug out of the wall, so they crawled through the small tunnel and immediately ran off into the woods with no direction or plan of action.

From there it was a blur of trees, walkers, and running for his life. On his right arm he felt a hand seize him and before he knew it, he was screaming.

-Understand-

He woke up that morning to being shaken and yelled at by Carol and from what he could tell, it was early morning, just after dawn. He quickly looked around and took in his surroundings, finally setting on Carol and being calmed by her bright blue eyes that held concern for him, at the moment.

Breathing in her scent, Daryl began to calm down, his breathing evening out and he began to actually register what was going on around him. He screwed his eyes shut and slowly breathed in, then gave a big exhale and opened his eyes to once again, see her staring at him, a little less freaked out and saying soothing words to calm him down.

"Daryl? Daryl can you hear me? Are you ok? What happened?!" Her barrage of questions didn't help, but he still tried his best to collect himself. He didn't want to tell her what he dreamed, because of all the nightmares he's had over the years, this one was one of the worst. Maybe because it was so damn real, that he couldn't believe that it actually happened. It wasn't even a dream, it was a flashback.

He looked up and was angered that Carol had to see him like that. After all the shit that's gone down you probably scared her, you dick. He just bolted up from his spot on the ground and she shifted away from him with a confused facial expression. It took her a second to understand what was going on but when she did, she slowly stood up and chuckled while shaking her head, mumbling something to herself.

Before he could say anything, she held up her hand, almost anticipating his response and said, "Don't Daryl. Don't worry about it. Just be ready in ten minutes, we are going to look for the tracks and go for the building. If you need me, which you probably won't, I'll be over there."

Carol walked off to her area and quickly packed up her bag. She strode off into the woods, probably to do her 'business', so he just got his crossbow together and sat waiting for her to return. When she came back a little while later, she just swiped up her bag and mumbled a quick "let's go" and before he knew it she was on her way and he was quickly scrambling to catch up to her.

They walked for hours, and there wasn't a minute that went by where Daryl wasn't watching Carol. After not seeing her for so long, he didn't want to take her for granted ever again, no matter what she'd done. He didn't have time to ask her about Karen and David, and right now, he didn't want to. He just wanted to be here with her. But he did see that she was stewing over something, and by the look on her face, it was important. So when they stopped for a 'lunch break', he just had to ask.

"What tha' hell you thinkin' so damn hard about? If you're worried about the others, I'm sure they're fine. We'll find 'em when we get to tha buildin'." He stared at her again, waiting to see if that would put her at ease, if only a little bit. But the wheels kept turning.

"No, that's... that's not it Daryl" And that was all she said before she went off again.

"Hey!" Daryl called. "If that ain't it, then what the hell's wrong with ya? Ya haven't been this damn quiet in a long time."

Carol turned around and stared him in the eye and said, "You won't like what I have to say, Daryl."

"Oh shit, well now I have ta know... C'mon woman, spill."

Carol seemed to be thinking about it, actually thinking about it so with one more nudge, she opened her mouth to talk again.

"It's about Rick."

Daryl snorted. "What 'bout Rick? Look, I know that you're pissed 'bout him leavin' you, but I'm gonna talk ta him about that when we meet back up with everybody at tha' building. I promise. Imma make it right."

Carol just shook her head. "No Daryl I'm not mad about what Rick did to me, not anymore. It's about what Rick did to you."

Daryl stood there, confused at her words. "What do you mean, what he did ta me? He didn't do shit ta me."

Carol threw up her hands, "EXACTLY Daryl! That's exactly it! He did nothing for you! You were in trouble, on your last legs, cornered by three people and Rick still went after Carl!"

"Carl was in trouble too... he was fightin' off a dude an' he needed help an'-"

"NO Daryl!" Carol cut him off harshly and brought her hands up to rake through her hair. She stared at him intently and spoke again, "Carl was fine! You should know by now that Carl is able to fight for himself. Carl was fine... How do I know? Because I WAS THE ONE that had to help you when Rick went off with Carl! I saved you. He didn't even give you a second look Daryl! He had no concern for your safety... He saw an out and he took it."

Daryl just shook his head at her, trying not to believe her words. "Uh-uh. That's his son. He had ta help him. And... there was a lot goin' on, and..."

Carol pointed at him as if she had caught him in a lie. "There! That's exactly it! If Rick was so 'in the right' then you wouldn't be stuttering! You know that I'm right, but you won't admit it, so you are stumbling through your excuses for him. He's not here with you, I AM and you are still defending him! I'm telling you right now, he wouldn't have made the same sacrifice for you that you have made for him so many times in the past. I know it. You told me last night how you practically gave yourself to the guy that led your 'claim group' or whatever it was just so that he wouldn't get hurt. You sacrifice yourself for him, time and time again, and he just takes it for granted. He takes you for granted."

Daryl shook his head as he quickly said "No. No, Rick woulda helped. Rick would sacrifice himself for me just like I would for him. I know he would. We are broth-"

Before he could finish the word Carol slapped Daryl's cheek. Not terribly hard, but harder than he ever thought possible for her. His entire head snapped to the side simply from the shock that he felt at the fact that one of his best friends had stricken him and slowly turned his head back towards her, his jaw set firmly and ready to explode.

However, as soon as he made eye contact with her, he saw too many things in her eyes. He saw anger. He saw pain. He saw desperation. He saw affection.

But what surprised him the most were the desperate tears that gathered in her normally crystal blue eyes which were now clouded over with a hurricane of emotion. He waited for her to say something because he knew that there was no way she was going to do that and then not say anything.

Carol inhaled a large breath and said in the most pleading voice possible, "Daryl, PLEASE. Please see this the way it is. You may think that Rick would risk his life for you or sacrifice himself, but unless you are 14 years old with a sheriff hat, half of Ricks blood and a bad attitude then he's not gonna to do shit. He would only do that for Carl! He's just been stringing you along because he and everybody else knew that if you left him he would be nothing! I meant what I said at the fire that night after we lost the farm. He'll just pull you down. You don't need him. You do deserve better. Oh, what I wouldn't give for you to see that. Please Daryl, please just open your eyes and see what you've been denying for way too long. Understand that Rick can't be that figure for anybody besides Carl because he doesn't want to be. Understand that Rick hasn't been ok in a good long while... Understand... Understand that he doesn't love you the way you deserve."

Carol exhaled sharply and looked down mustering up the courage to say what she had been trying to deny for years.

"Daryl, understand that I want to do that for you. Understand that I'm the one that would sacrifice myself for you. Understand that I love you how you deserve. Please."

Daryl just stared back at her, as if simply by the sheer force of his will he could stop her tears. Now, all at once, the slap made sense. The harshness of her words, the razor sharpness of her voice and the anger and hurt in her eyes. "Pookie" seemed like a million years ago. And in that moment, the questions arose like bile in his throat: Was Rick really a fake? Was he just another Merle for him to blindly worship? Was Carol the only one?

Could he ever truly understand?

Did he even know who he was anymore?

Did he even want to. . . .

And there you go! *exhales* whew! That was crazy, but I hope you guys liked it! Don't be afraid to drop a review my way if you liked it and follow/favorite because I'm going to be writing a lot more coming soon... I have more of this planned out, as well as a couple more one-shots up my sleeve, and a multi-chapter fic... If you guys want more I'd be happy to continue!

Good day my fellow Carylers!