I own nothing.
Just a lot of Frigga, Thor, Loki feels put into words. The films missed out so many opportunities to show the relationship between the family (deleted scenes anyone?). This was written at 6 in the morning, so it may not be the best I've written; and it certainly isn't the happiest.
She has always seen them.
Her boys; one brash and bold, the other calm and cunning. One is fire where the other is water.
She remembers the joy that encompassed her soul when she held Thor in her arms for the first time; a small, pink infant. She remembers the tears that fell when he had first opened his eyes and stared up at her with eyes as blue as her own. He had been loud and demanding, and she had spent the first few years almost constantly tired due to caring for him. Odin had tried to persuade her to use nurses more often but she wouldn't hear of it. He was hers, and for all the sleep she missed, there was always a smile on the face of her son when she played with him.
She remembers when her husband returned from the war, bringing an unexpected surprise. She remembers how she'd gone into confinement until it was plausible that the child was theirs. Those had been long, secretive months. But not boring; never boring. This infant was different from her own, his eyes were green and he had a peace about him. She had named him Loki as he had no name, and from that moment he was hers and she was his.
She has seen them as children - playing and growing, laughing and learning. She showed Thor how to wear his red cape the first time, and she explained to Loki how he should fasten his belts. They called her Mama then, centuries upon centuries ago. Her boys had grown close, despite their differences. She saw how Thor would lead his brother by the hand when he thought no one was looking and she saw how Loki would play harmless tricks to keep him entertained for hours.
She had seen then, that one was a warrior and the other a strategist.
But she had also seen the confusion in Loki's face when Thor had asked him why his hair was not gold like the rest of them. She remembers smiling and telling them both it made no difference - they are brothers always. She remembers the relentless arguments with Odin about honesty and family.
As they grew she watched as Thor ran in with his first prize, his first spoils from the battlefield. She saw how Odin had greeted him, and she saw Loki's face. Loki. She saw him when he studied; determined and absorbed. He had always been a clever boy.
She saw their devotion; to the realm, to the family, to each other. To her. She watched it strengthen with every battle, every challenge. She remembers when Thor began to talk like a leader and not a child. She remembers when Loki stopped playing tricks for fun and started using magic to defend. She had worried then, afraid they had grown too different, too devoted. Ridiculous, Odin had told her, how can a prince be too devoted?
She saw Thor's pride when Odin declared him the heir and she saw the saw the shock in Loki's face when he returned from Jotunheim. They had still been boys.
She remembers sitting at Odin's bedside. She had seen Loki's pain, his confusion. She rushed to assure him we are your family. She felt wretched - her boys were not meant to feel separate from her. Not her boys. She remembers Loki taking the staff, and the determination that had filled his features. He would be a good King, she could tell.
When he struck Laufey down and embraced her she had seen the pride in his eyes. I swear to you Mother, they will pay for what they've done. It had shook her to see him so vigilant. She had seen all traces of confidence leave him when Thor returned.
Her eldest had changed; she saw it. She saw the solemnity he carried, the awareness in his gaze. When they mourned, she saw his grief. He told her about Midgard and about the girl he had met, and she saw the softness in his eyes when he said her name. Jane.
She noticed how he would visit Heimdall each evening and she saw how he seemed both more melancholy and more uplifted. She wondered if he asked for his brother or for the girl.
She remembers when they found Loki was alive. She had nearly sobbed from happiness. But she had seen the fear and anger that engulfed Thor when he was told his brother planned for Midgard. She worried.
When at last, both her boys came to her she had seen them, both weary and hardened, and she saw them cold to each other. It made her want to weep. She saw two men. Where had her boys gone?
She had always seen them.
When Thor - her brave, blonde soldier - lost the last remainder of hope for his brother, she had seen it. She saw him turn away, saw it pained him to look at the boy he had grow with. Do not give up, she told him. You are brothers always. She saw the disbelief in his answering gaze.
When Loki - her clever, collected protegee - was presented in chains he smiled, and she saw it. She saw the rage in his eyes and the hollowness in his heart. She saw his loneliness in her visits to his cell. Do not give up. You are brothers always. She saw the denial in his answering grin.
Her boys were not her boys anymore. They were grown, and moulded, and twisted by fate. They were men of stone, too hardened to be what they once were.
But still she saw them.
She had always seen them.
Like I said, it's all just feels. Let me know what you think, comments are appreciated :)