Chapter 1: Le Sexy Introduction

Once upon a time, there was a T. In the 'T' lived five teenagers, unsupervised, and somehow able to pay all of the high-ass electricity bills (*cough* Batman). Inside of the five teenagers were Cheesy Queasy Sleazy Beezy Wheezy puffs and grape soda. The five teenagers had completely different personalities-but they all loved Cheesy Queasy Sleazy Beezy Wheezy puffs.

Robin was the Boy Wonder. No matter how much he hated to be called that, his first appearance into the DCU showed him jumping through a paper trampoline that was being held by a smiling man in a rubber black suit, he is to be called that. For eternity. Forever and ever and ever and ever. His black hair was so shiny you had to wear sunglasses to look at it, as was his uniform. Sure, he was manly…as manly as you can look in apple green spandex and a Newberry red racing top, some frog fasteners, and a domino mask. Since he was raised by Batman, he was a broody, asshole-ish, son of a gun who cared only about two things:

Creased capes and tracking down villains in a sociopathic manner.

He was also not allowed to reveal his real identity to any of his friends. Not only because it would lead back to Bruce- I MEAN BATMAN-, but he would also get teased by every single person on his team for it…except for maybe Starfire. What was his name? Dick Grayson.

"Get over here, Dick."

"Pass me the salt, Dick."

"You better have my money by the fifteenth or so help me, I'll tie you to a totem pole, bedazzle you, give you vampire fangs, and sick you onto the fangirls! Dick, do you really want me to do that?!"

If he was a social network, he'd be Linkedin.

His direct opposite was named Beast Boy. Beast Boy was a Changeling. What does that mean, you ask? Well:

'A changeling is a creature found in folklore and folk religion. It is typically described as being the offspring of a fairy, troll, elf or other legendary creature that has been secretly left in the place of a human child. Sometimes the term is also used to refer to the child who was taken. The apparent changeling could also be a stock or fetch, an enchanted piece of wood that would soon appear to grow sick and die. The theme of the swapped child is common among medieval literature and reflects concern over infants thought to be afflicted with unexplained diseases, disorders, or developmental disabilities.

A human child might be taken due to many factors: to act as a servant, the love of a human child, or malice. Most often it was thought that fairies exchanged the children. Some Norwegian tales tell that the change was made to prevent inbreeding: to give trolls and humans new blood, humans were given children with enormous strength as a reward. In some rare cases, the very elderly of the Fairy people would be exchanged in the place of a human baby, and then the old fairy could live in comfort, being coddled by its human parents. Simple charms, such as an inverted coat or open iron scissors left where the child sleeps, were thought to ward them off; other measures included a constant watch over the child.'

…But we all know that Wikipedia is always wrong, right? Hehe…anyways. Beast Boy is nice, cute, fun, awesome, and just about any other word that fangirls can drum out of their minds. He is a very green person. He's green in complexion, green health-wise, and green as in eco-friendly. His skin is green, a very beautiful shade of green in fact. He eats a lot of tofu since he is a vegetarian, although he has been every single animal, which contradicts to logic. The logic that if you've been something, why would you eat it? For example, why would Beast Boy eat an egg if he's been a chick before?

Oh, and before you get the wrong meaning from that wording, Beast Boy can shape-shift. He can turn into any animal he likes within the blink of an eye. A bunny. A t-rex. Pretty much anything.

If he were a social network, he'd be Instagram.

Raven is the opposite of Beast Boy. She's been called 'moody', 'mean', 'bitchy', 'emo', 'gothic'. But she's just…Raven. She likes to meditate alone in her dark bedroom. But that doesn't make her any of those things. Something that nobody- not her friends, not her mother, not her demonic father-knows about her is a secret that she had kept under wraps for a long time. That secret…is very dark. Very twisted. Very disturbing. Raven…is a gleek.

That's right; the dark demonic sorceress sits down every…whatever day that show comes on…and sways along to the music.

Her powers include moving stuff, punching stuff, kicking stuff, and levitating over stuff.

If she were a social network, she'd be Tumblr.

The opposite of her was the happy-go-lucky, smiley, bubbly, positive, Starfire.

Starfire is…well, like I said: happy-go-lucky, smiley, bubbly, and positive. She is an open-book and shares her feelings with all, letting them flow like a river filled with honey and rainbows and the melted remains of chocolate unicorns. But she had to let her feelings flow; they enabled her powers to work. She shot fire thingies from her hands, crushed things with her hands, shot eye-lasers with her eyes (no dip) and flew with the power of L-O-V-E! She also has the power of kissing people to learn languages, and making friends with anyone and everyone.

If she was a social network, she'd be Facebook.

Cyborg isn't really the opposite of anyone. He can be broody like Robin, moody like Raven, happy-go-lucky like Starfire, or goofy like Beast Boy. He was the second in command, the co-captain, and the token black character. He was super-duper strong, and could shoot a sonic cannon out of his arm. Why? His body was half-electronic, so he could be listening to music on one arm, blogging on another, and shooting a Vine in his palm. In Fanfictions, he is typically completely ignored, seen as a useless character. Quite a shame, since he's a professional cock-blocker.

If he were a social network, he would be YouTube.

So, as you can see, this is a very beautiful team who lives inside a very beautiful T. Who ever thought that this beautiful T would burn down in less than 48 hours from the update time of this chapter?

Hey thar! Miss me?! No..okay...

Let's try this again...hi! Well, it's me, I'm back from the hiatus that never happened, and I'm writing another stupid story that came from my mind! AND I'M SO EXCITED! NOT BECAUSE OF CHRISTMAS- WHICH I AM- BUT BECAUSE MY BIRTHDAY IS IN 18 DAYS! Although I'm pretty sure nobody will read this...

*goes and cries in corner*

Review and Favorite. Grammar Nazis and Flamers welcome!